WHY I LEFT AA ( Alcoholics Anonymous ) 

Four years sober (February 16, 2020) and I had a couple in person meetings before the COVID pandemic shut everything down, but I attended online meetings twice a week. I religiously followed the 12 steps (never had a sponsor) and connected a lot of my life upbringing to where I ended up, and was able to rewire my thoughts, actions, and emotions to turn things around. Life was correcting and relationships repairing at such a fast pace that when I attended meetings it made me feel I was doing something wrong, as most of the attendees all seemed to struggle. I felt this was doing more harm then good to my recovery so I stopped attending, except for a yearly meeting to remind myself of where I was. AA changed my life for sure, but I just believe there is a time when it has to become the past and not making the fact I am an acholic my identity. I now live my life within the guidelines of the 12 steps, strive for personal improvement, and continue to grow in a positive direction (while staying sober). The fundamentals of AA are fantastic, the meetings is where I think it is not for everyone on a long term basis and no one should feel guilty for expressing any opinion on what is the right way...recovery is different for everyone.

I’ve been abstinent for 28 years and work in the addictions field. I think there’s something that works for everyone. There’s nothing wrong with any of the treatments available, it just depends on what works for each individual. I think we can all learn from lots of different things. Whatever is working for you, keep doing that!

Tried AA many times I don't resonate with it. Most of the people are very nice and well meaning. It can be very toxic. I believe in healing and moving on. Most of the people I know who are sober and healthy did so without AA. One of the themes of most meetings are people talking about feeling crazy when they havent attended a meeting.

I just happened to stumble upon this video. This is very brave of to share so much of yourself. I wish you the best.

I highly recommend Melody Beatty’s Codependent No More. I share your struggles. It really helped me.

AA taught me to talk about my problems instead of avoiding them.

Very thoughtful video. I really enjoyed this. Great work

I didn't know what a resentment was until I came to AA. Most of the people on my 4th step resentment column were from AA,

AA IS ABSOLUTELY FANTASTIC WITH THE CORRECT COUNSELLORS I WENT TO A VERY STRICT ONE AND IVE NEVER LOOKED BACK BECAUSE IT SAVED MY LIFE ❤❤❤❤ BECKY 🇬🇧 🇬🇧

You could not have said this better..I've been thousands of times, I'm long sober..I get it..I have not attended in 5 yrs about..thank you

I don't believe in God and AA helped me...

First off thank you for this video, I enjoyed, agree and can very much relate with what you have to say:) I have 27 months of no alcohol currently. I started going to AA for the first 7 months after that I started drifting away from AA at odds if it was really for me or not? It does feel cult like in some ways but I have taken away some really great tools from AA. But for me it really is an all or nothing type of thing and I also had trouble finding a sponsor although I didn't try very hard to find one, sharing my personal life experiences with complete strangers is something I'm not super in line with. It's good to know I'm not the only one who feels like this and it's nice to come across someone else who does. All the AA meetings in the world cannot change my past and the only thing I can 100% commit to right now is not drinking which so far is going fantastic for me:) I look forward to more videos, Cheers🥰 oops:) quick side note I am also a musician and I utilize my musical talents as a way to unravel and heal from my abusive alcoholic behaviors which has been a really great tool and I'm blessed to have music writing and performance to help me in my recovery journey🥰

AA= name of the book.

There are many other tools, Than A.A , and you have to find what works, If some people you don't fit in with, find another meeting, there all over the world. There's mental health therapy, Religion, Whatever works that helps you not pick up a drink. Thank you for posting this video, I've been sober since Jan 20th of this year, Had long periods of sobreity , been locked up, Runied my life from alchol, I could chat with you for a few hours to tell you the whole story, You're not alone, Remeber 1 day 1 thing at a time, and whatever it takes not to pick up a drink DO IT. If you need anyone to talk to, I'm always here for you! :)

Thank you so much for sharing this. So many people don’t see or understand pages 20-21 in the big book that discusses the “hard drinker” who can look very much like an alcoholic-but is not an alcoholic! You may very well fall into this category? Many “hard drinkers” can need a detox or medical help to initially stop and need support to do so BUT if they have “sufficient reason” to stay stopped they CAN! Because they have not lost the power to be able to do that! Real alcoholics don’t have the ability to stay stopped without a spiritual solution. They can’t stop once they start to drink due to the “physical craving” and they can’t stay stopped once they have stopped due to the “mental obsession.” There truly is a world of ignorance and misunderstanding about alcoholism-(page 20) including people within AA-and even those who are die hard BB practitioners-don’t fully understand the differences between hard drinkers and real alcoholics. As a recovered alcoholic with 26 years, I aim to do my very best to help people qualify themselves as an alcoholic or hard drinker by discovering their own truth with both the craving and the obsession. (meaning from their own experiences with both craving the obsession) Because we only need the 12 steps as a way of life permanently, if we can not stay stopped without a spiritual solution, after we have stopped. That being said AA and the big book is also not the ONLY spiritual program that can show you how to stay stopped! There are many other 12 step type of paths that can show you how to tap into a higher power to stay stopped. And of course the big book acknowledges that some people still really need to find out if they can stay stopped on their own-and factually even encourages them to try to do it IF they need to(page 34)-so they can actually find out if they are powerless to do that/or if they actually can stop on their own power. (Which hard drinkers CAN do.) But If you find you can’t stay stopped you can always come back to AA if you wish-and you will be welcomed back with open arms. Or try another spiritual path that might also be able to show you a way to do it. Whatever happens, I wish you the very best. And I truly hope more AA members get to know what our text book, the big book, is actually saying about this extremely important subject.

Aa was the only thing that helped me get and stay sober. That being said aa has also taught me that I am more than just an alcoholic. I have mental disorders as well that the steps would not help with these other issues. I didn't like the authority that some sponsors in aa use. People are sick in those rooms. People are still people so I try not to judge them.

I left AA because I really wanted to get drunk peacefully, and, without judgement. Actually, I quit drinking in one day and stayed sober for nine years - just did not wanna wake up feeling like crap, ever again. I started again and drank for about four years. Then, I quit completely about 30 years ago. I got a DUI (when I was drinking the second time around) and got sent to AA by the court and it never helped me, whatsoever. I'd leave those mandatory meetings and just wanna go drink some beer. Everyone's different, I guess. I was never swayed by all of the testimonies and did not like the insistence that I was powerless and somewhere a god was controlling stuff. When I wanted to quit, I quit - for me it was that simple.

Progress. Not perfection. Also, welcome to "in between" land. For me, "in between" land is the most fascinating part of recovery. Thank you for sharing your story.

AA worked for me for a while, but I saw no joy or freedom. Never really hurt or abused others in my drinking. I'm 62 and the mad drinking is over, but I enjoyed the conviviality of drinkers having a good time! 👍🙏❤️

I just mainly go to birthday and speaker meetings

I used Allan Carr's Easyway to break my 40-year addiction to booze since childhood. It cost me £5 in a charity shop, and took 1 week. No religion, no AA. You can get the book & CD free in your Library. I made a video about it, "An Artist's Journey to Alcohol Free". Hope it helps. Sober now for 6 years.

AA has only a 5-8% success rate. I read somewhere that on his deathbed Bill W. asked for alcohol… Hard to reconcile that information in my mind. There is a multitude of excellent online sobriety coaches (craig beck, annie grace, kevin o’hara, simon chappel just to name a few) that use current research and not an “approach” that is 90 years old.

It is in the way that we find God but what people don’t know is that God find them first. Some time it takes a long lived life to realice. Unfortunately, you do not need sobriety to realize that it’s like knowing between right and wrong, and still choose to do what is wrong or not knowing that we actually have a choice.

Interesting perspective of your point of view. Alcohol destroyed 15 years of my life that I can never get back. I agree to disagree on some of the things you said but I agree that AA ain’t for everyone and they seem a bit harsh with there rules the 12 steps ain’t for everyone also. I do agree that AA and the 12 steps have saved thousands of lives and has helped thousands more. I personally never got into the AA programs and meetings, never read the big book and never followed the 12 steps but here I am 5 years sober later. The thing is that I am an addict and alcoholic and will always be. Just because I’ve been sober 5 years doesn’t make me a non alcoholic. I am a beer away from ruining my life again or worse. Being sober as and addict or alcoholic is extremely hard but it is possible to be sober and stay sober with hard work and dedication. You saying that you’re not an alcoholic anymore because you are now sober is a F’n joke. If you never struggled with alcoholism and addiction to an extreme degree, then I would Iagree that you ain’t no alcoholic or addict. But if alcohol was your only way of life no matter how sober you are, you are literally a beer a way from destroying your sobriety and how hard it took to maintain clean. A real alcoholic an addict will always recognize and admit to be being an addict and alcoholic no matter how much time and years they have been sober. Happy you’re sober though and good for you. Keep grinding with your sobriety sister

AA is marmite, very well said & perhaps the best way to conceive of AA & all other approaches that advocate ONE way & ONE way only - BIG BUCK THINKERS!!! Aka fundamentalists of all persuasions; fundamentalism is the same as any cult anywhere, anytime…😊🤗 I love marmite, especially with toasted cheese & as a spread under fried eggs on toast…weird but works for me & I love it. I also like apricot jam & sliced boiled eggs on toast……🤗😊

Thank you for sharing and being vulnerable. I also made a video as a testimony how Alcoholics Anonymous did not serve me 💫✨

I have resorted to drinking premix zero sugar cans, so far so good 🤔😊

mind over matter you decide to control your drinking,smoking etc not it controlling you,,,,cold turkey and mean it,,not a lifetime addiction

I love the old literature of AA but I'm not a big fan of modern AA . 2 different entities entirely. The old literature was not polarizing. Modern-day AA has some individuals who are mean spirited and dictatorial. Sad! But is principles before personalities. Hang with the winners. Meaning the ones who know how to love...

I love your videos, you are a beautiful and interesting woman. What supplements would you recommend for someone with generalized anxiety disorder and social anxiety disorder?

Greetings from 🦘

I found people in AA to be controlling and hypocritical. Tried it off and on for years and it was more detrimental to me than helpful.

Don't know why I was recommended this, I don't even drink. But good luck everyone I guess

Is not a curse, is a warning. Read how it works some have grave and mental disorders

You’re beautiful

AA is stuck in the 1940's. Addiction is better understood these days.

harm reduction is far more effective

You are sneaky 😈 😈 😈

It is a criminal organization

No one 'used to be' an addict/alcoholic. Once an addict, always an addict. We are either active in our recovery or addiction.

Make your point!, stop being so apologetic

Yep yep, you are an alcoholic. Alcoholic has a mind problem and is not a self help program. Alcoholic has a thinking problem. Not drinking or staying abstenerse from drinking doesn’t chang the fact once an alcoholic is all ways an alcoholic. This is the tepical read pg 30 of the big book.