Why Marriage Is NOT a Contract (It’s a Covenant) 

most people do take marriage seriously, but I do believe there are times when one or both parties has a right to leave the marriage: abuse, neglect, or infidelity are often times great reasons for someone to leave an unhealthy marriage. there is study after study that tells us about the effects of abuse, neglect, violence, and infidelity have on a couple and that effects the children. sometimes, an annulment or a divorce is necessary for the well being of all parties.

Yes. The best married couples I know not only put God first, but they literally took their marriage as a covenant between them and God.

God bless you both ❤️🙏

Wow! That's great. I must confess that as a 39 year old man I have never seen a happy marriage in my life! Half of my family is Catholic and half us Nazarene. It doesn't seem to matter what Church you are part of. I almost think that it is more luck of tge draw than anything. I sometimes think that marriage is less a gift from God, but more of a curse to punish us. I truly think God wants people to be unhappy in this life. I think that the more miserable you are in this life, the more God will bless you in the next life.

I am a very happily married women of 42 years. What a joyous, wonderful covenant it can be. But it takes work, support and time to develop a fabulous relationship. Marriage is just the start. The covenant and the paper matters.

@@Alexander44665 I feel so bad for you! Marriage is a Sacrament, like Baptism. It is a gift from God. If you are faithful He will lead you to the right person. Make sure you are going in the same direction, want the same things, and are both committed to marriage. My husband came from a marrying family. Marriage meant forever. That helps too: being committed to your vows, not just loving the person. A Hollywood actress was married to a man who cheated on her constantly. Friends asked her why she didn't divorce him, as she had every reason to. She said, "I didn't just take my vows to him; I took my vows to GOD." I was blown away. I respected her so much. Sometimes I want to choke my husband of 32 years, but the good times are SO GOOD. Not always easy, but worth the work, the forgiveness, the patience, that is essential to a good marriage. Remember: you don't know what goes on in someone else's marriage. Your family may be much happier in their marriages than you know. You can't judge. Pay no attention to complaints. Everyone has to vent sometimes when their spouse is driving them nuts! Doesn't mean they aren't happy. Marriage is not a lifetime of unending bliss. That cannot be sustained. Respect, admiration, caring, compassion, and forgiveness are all things you have to practice to keep a good marriage happy.

@@knitwit7082 as regards the Hollywood star one does not have to stay with an abusive or serially unfaithful spouse to keep vows. If a person chooses to leave such a spouse for their and their children's peace if mind or protection the person is still faithful if

God bless your marriage ❤

Holy Moly 😮 Congrats!!!That is incredible! I am turning 42 in a few weeks and I can’t believe that I’ve put up with myself for that long little own someone else haha. I’m just kidding. Your blessings are a great inspiration for many. Especially me 💗 Thank you for sharing!

45 last August

Catholic marriage is "until death do we part" and you are free to marry again after the death of your spouse. Of course, you don't HAVE to! That's a given. But you are definitely allowed. Catholic marriage is NOT "forever."

@@SilverCottage You're right that a Catholic can remarry after the death of a spouse, but there are two versions of the marriage vows. My husband and I chose the "All the days of my life" version that the above commenter mentioned.

This was a great video. My fiancé and I are planning on meeting with our priest next week to go over the church’s sacrament of matrimony. I am catholic, my fiancé is not. Is there anything he should know or we should know before going into this meeting?

The bond may be forever, but the "marriage" literally ends at death. There will be no married couples in the resurrection, as Jesus said.

I'm not Catholic but what a beautiful statement. God Bless.

Happy 25th anniversary! My wife and I will likewise celebrate our 25th this year.

♥️✝️🩸 1 Peter 3 KJV 18 For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit: 2 Peter 2 KJV 1 But there were false prophets also among the people, even as there shall be false teachers among you, who privily shall bring in damnable heresies, even denying the Lord that bought them, and bring upon themselves swift destruction. Acts 20 KJV 28 Take heed therefore unto yourselves, and to all the flock, over the which the Holy Ghost hath made you overseers, to feed the church of God, which he hath purchased with his own blood. 1 Peter 1 KJV 19 But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot: Colossians 1 KJV 14 In whom we have redemption through his blood, even the forgiveness of sins: Romans 3 KJV 25 Whom God hath set forth to be a propitiation through faith in his blood, to declare his righteousness for the remission of sins that are past, through the forbearance of God; Ephesians 1 KJV 7 In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace; ♥️know♥️ 1 John 5 KJV 13 These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God.

your feelings are understandable, It's always difficult to let go of someone you love, i was in a similar situation when my wife of 12 years left me, i couldn't just let her go. I did all I could to get her back, I had to seek the help of a spiritual adviser who helped me bring her back.

@@bartholetbay412 Wow, how did you get a spiritual adviser, and how do i reach her?

@@Margart526 her name is MONICA ERLENE MORA, and she is a great spiritual adviser as well as a caster and healer

@@bartholetbay412 Thank you for this valuable information, I just looked her up online. impressive.

​@Margart Bochner how did you know the spiritual adviser was a girl?

Our parish does that also. So nice!

Praying for you I feel you 🙏

@Leaf My priest and the diocese said its a petrine annulment and can take up to a year and a half

@@leaf4958 I forgot to mention im a convert in the RCIA so I hope that helps

@@leaf4958 That is my understanding as well. You only need an annulment to remarry. The Church does not recognize divorce.

@@tiff1622 If you're not yet a Catholic, I'm not sure divorce would be an impediment to joining the Church and receiving the sacraments.

Correct....there's the idea, and then there's reality

You are right, however let's disagree to agree. First point is you do not need a paper to show or prove that you love someone. The marriage certificate is a legal statement and officially social recognition of your union, but again, the marriage is the acceptance of the other by choice regardless A B C D criteria, this is called unconditional LOVE. And in the Catholic and a normal Christian faith, marriage has been established (institutionalized) by God Himself, so by principal it is a convenent not a contract. First marriage is the one of Adam and Eva (Book of Genesis), there wasn't any certificate or any sort of condition. Marriage is a gift to Humanity. This is why I still find it hard to desacralize marriage as we can now see in the modern society where marriage is being materialized and perverted.

@@c-bastyanaka8231 I’ll say it again for those who need the extra help…Marriage is a very serious endevour & most of us pick foolishly & treat poorly. It is not something to be taken lightly but most do. When you let God in your heart & see his way & he shows you your true self…one picks more wisely. Left to our own understanding…we pick so foolishly & what seems like a perfect & desirous match is anything but. Humbling to the marrow. The End.

Skunky, I am so with you. Even if you only live like you are brother/sister for awhile, there's discernment for awhile. A lot of discernment is really important.

"On the flip side…if it’s just a “piece of paper”…what stops people stopping playing house if it’s so insignificant?" Nothing. That's why marriage is declining and polling has found that a significant number of people under the age of 30 have never had a serious relationship.

Fr. Mike is a blessing and you blessed us with this lovely statement ❤

👑♥️ easiest Crown to receive in the Bible. 2 Timothy 4 KJV 8 Henceforth there is laid up for me a crown of righteousness, which the Lord, the righteous judge, shall give me at that day: and not to me only, but unto all them also that love his appearing. 1 Peter 3 KJV 18 For Christ also hath once suffered for sins, the just for the unjust, that he might bring us to God, being put to death in the flesh, but quickened by the Spirit: 1 Peter 1 KJV 19 But with the precious blood of Christ, as of a lamb without blemish and without spot: Colossians 1 KJV 14 In whom we have redemption through his blood, even the forgiveness of sins: Ephesians 1 KJV 7 In whom we have redemption through his blood, the forgiveness of sins, according to the riches of his grace; ♥️know♥️ 1 John 5 KJV 13 These things have I written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God.

Marriage is contractual with terms.

Marriage already existed for thousands of years before this god was even invented

@@TamponesBand is yours an infallible statement?

No. It is defined as a LEGAL CONTRACT. That is what marriage IS to distinguish it from other relationships. You can have a fancy Catholic wedding, but if you don't have the license from the office of records or city hall-the CONTRACT, which is what marriage IS-you are NOT married. You are shacked up with none of the bennies that go along with marriage.

Exactly correct. It has always been secular. Religion glommed onto it much later than its origins of 5,000 years ago.

True story!

The seriousness of marriage would be correct grammar

How exactly does marriage "settle" a person? It is such an insult to imply that single people are somehow unstable and "unsettled" unless they sign a piece of paper and go through some sham ceremony.

@@suzymoon2067 i was accepted 😊🙏🏼 not long after this comment

I know what you are talking about 👍

Marriage is a solemn contract aka covenant.

I’m so glad you watched this. More people need to understand the difference.

God bless you and your upcoming marriage!

Yes, so grateful! Thank you Lord Jesus for your sacrifice for us!

Congratulations 🍾🎊🎉🎈 so happy for you!

Correct! Finally, someone who gets it!

A marriage ceremony doesn't have to be performed in a church to be a legal marriage. However, the CONTRACT or license MUST exist for a marriage to exist; otherwise, you are shacked up. Marriage has always been a secular concept, not a religious one.

Well, I used to think this too, but no, according to JESUS, HE didn't like it at all. He said it was allowed because of the hardness of our hearts. Just because Im not the one that did not take part in the physical adultery let's say, that doesn't get me a free pass to walk. For the sake of blanket statements here, in the case I described, let's say my wife truly is a Believer as I in Jesus, then she's also my sister in Christ. So per God's Holiness, He still looks at us as 1, not 2. Would it be hard to reconcile; you bet, yet it's the entirety of scripture we must look at us we claim to be growing in our faith. Just because on this case, the wife committed the act, I would be hard pressed to stand before Jesus to give Him a sinless account of my role in the marriage. God wants reconciliation and forgiveness. After all, don't we want God to forgive us much?

@@suzymoon2067 Amen, wish you blessings my dear!

@Mikeschmitz5 oh cool pray that scammers stop commenting on my comments.

It's a solemn contract. If NFP is licit, spouses have zero rights bc NFP makes secondary ends primary.

Sorry for this vocab is very specific and English isn't my first language, but I'll try my best to make it clear, even if through the wrong formal terms lol. If you were young and imature it's very probable that it's a case of anullment. Catholic marriage is only valid when both parts agree competely on human will to take the vows. Some examples of what could be annuled: - shotgun wedding (through external pressure, because of unexpected pregnancy or because you didn't want to upset/let yours or their family down, fear of lonelyness, emotional imaturity). Anything that makes your "yes" at the altar not sincere fits into making the vow fail to be of a true human will, because it's not coming from your inner will, but from some form of external pressure. No need to be a literal shotgun lol. - not knowing beforehand something really substantial. When only after the marriage one discovers something about the other that, had they known beforehand, woud deeply affect wether they would decide to marry or not. For example: someone lies/hides a serious vice, or an intent not to have kids. If, for instance, I have a boyfriend that agrees with me to have kids just for me to be ok with him but never seriously wanted to, then we marry and I find out he doesn't want them, we're on anullment grounds, for had I known beforehand I wouldn't have said "yes". - Basically anything that makes your "yes" not to come from both Reason and Will together can make your vows invalid. The most charicatural case would be a drunk wedding in Vegas, but even the burst of passion can be impairing if you don't take enough time do discern properly. If I were you I would reach out for a priest that understands about Canonic Law or can direct you to some guidance, and seek for the anullment if plausible (it seems to be the case) so you can have peace in your soul, an renew your journey to Heaven :D God bless!

I've had a similar situation. Married in '99, blessed in '10 and divorced in '21. I'm currently seeking an annulment and must say it's been a healing process. God bless you on your journey.

Right but that’s the point: a covenant doesn’t work that way. That’s Fr’s whole point. Everything in a contract is CONDITIONAL. A covenant is NOT conditional. I got married in the Church, and they drove this point through to the end. You have to always bring your best, your 100%, not your 50%, to the marriage, even if the other person is not able to or willing to. ***there are exceptions to that rule***but just because there are exceptions doesn’t make the rule invalid.

@@ntmn8444 I understand the distinction he's making is conditional vs unconditional commitment, but those are not real legal properties of a contract vs a covenant. A contract is not optional once both parties agree. Legally speaking, a covenant is something included in a contract and not a separate type of agreement. I'm not disagreeing with unconditional vs conditional commitment in a marriage, I agree it's best approached as a permanent/unconditional agreement, but the analogy he's making stems from a misunderstand of what a contract is and what a covenant is.