Its time to leave. That does not mean you love him less, but there is nothing left to work with. Especially with the gaslighting and guilt trip. Sounds more like he is showing his true colors. Youve done nothing but reach out to him and the second you pull away, he makes you the bad guy. Don't forget, you also lost a daughter. He refused to meet you half way and when you demanded he make an effort, he shutdown again with the same disrespect he's been targeting you with. You really have nothing to feel bad about. He is the one that should feel bad. Life is short. Live.
Honestly, I would quietly move out the next time he is out of the house, leave the divorce papers and a handwritten note explaining why I was leaving (it would be heartfelt and basically say I love you but we both have different ways we need to grieve in, separately. And whatever else was pertinent). I’d try to make sure it sounded as empathetic as possible, but I would have to value my own mental health enough to put myself first. If he wants to burn his life to the ground because he can’t handle the guilt, then it is what it is; OP can’t stop him, but she _can_ save herself from the fire.
Just because he’s hurting does not excuse hurting his wife with his actions, nor acting like the second after literally 2 years of him becoming a litteral nightmare that she’s suddenly the bad guy for no longer being able to tolerate the disrespect, back lash and outright violence (via throwing and breaking shit while raging.) He needs extreme help she cannot provide and should not be expected to sacrifice herself to help a man intent on drowning without any regard for who else he hurts along the way. Either get him on an involuntary psych hold if possible or leave - or do both if nessecary. But she should not be expected to keep suffering his abusive and abrasive treatment at her expense nor deny herself the ability to properly grieve since she’s probably had to keep shelving that to take care of him.
OP needs to leave. You can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped. Also, OP needs to process her own grief and feelings… I wish all the best for OP! 😢
If I was her I’d file for divorce and leave while he wasn’t there, then I’d file for a restraining order. He’s already expressed he wants her dead, and she needs to first get evidence (voice recordings) then go to the police, because they won’t believe her without it. She needs to have physical money, never use a credit card, or none of that. Most people would go to their parent’s house, don’t ever do that! He knows where they live and he’s gonna try to find her, and that time he will lay hands on her. If he refuses to sign the divorce papers, she can do a default divorce. And get a restraining order for 30 ft and never look back. It may look like I’m taking this too seriously but my bio mother (who isn’t in my life) and my stepmom’s mom was beat on severally. But it all started with this behavior. My bio mother was almost killed.
It’s kind of like CPR doesn’t work when there’s no blood to circulate, you tried all you can but it’s to the point there’s nothing left for you to fix. Your time is done. Leave and move on, celebrate your daughters life how you want and move on with yours. You shouldn’t feel guilty for this, again there’s nothing left for you to do.
Traumas or bad experiences do not give us the right to take each other for granted and treat each other badly. He is choosing not to get help. Her ultimatum is getting help, or they divorce. He is now violent and has told her to go 💀 herself. While she seems to have done everything so he can grieve, she has grieved alone, it seems. She doesn't love her child less. She loves her family as a whole and is healthily trying to grieve and live. She should have a period of separation, and if he doesn't, then see what's wrong, she should leave. She wasn't showing her true colours with the ultimatum. She showed his. She wasn't abandoning him. He abandoned their relationship by choosing not to get help and instead becoming more abusive and using grief as his excuse. 😞
This entire story tells me the husband is a psychopath who wanted to get rid of the daughter so he could have more room in the house and then wanted to get rid of his wife so he’s being neglecting and mentally abusing her since the daughters death. Run before he takes you in the car with him. There is something majorly wrong with him other than losing his kid. when you lose someone you don’t generally tell the only other person you have to go die unless you really want that to happen. my question is, were the father and the daughter fighting or arguing in the days before.
This poor man is seeking a punishment he blames himself and he wants you to hate him and leave him he wants you to hurt him I am so sorry but it sounds like it is getting dangerous for you and letting him blow up at you will only make it worse I don’t know if there is enough to get him involuntarily committed so you only choice is to walk away
@@AjiaJ Oh sh!t! I'm such an idiot. I'm so sorry, I was too busy watching what your hands were doing, that I didn't see that up at the top of the screen.
wow.. ur pregnant again rn? but still making thirst trap vid to show off your body and cooking skills that you still can be wifey? I mean, what are you doing? Even if you end up single, is immediately parading yourself around the market the way to go? no time to take being single and reflecting? nothing like that? just get pregnant with the same man again..? What you gonna do, use this against him for child support? just stop and be honest with him now incase he don't even want the kid in those circumstances, not everything is about you and only you, he matters too@@AjiaJ
I don't believe that story. She's not just some understanding angel that never does anything wrong. Don't go to strangers with a fake story to validate your decision. If you want to leave him just leave him.
By the way, looking at the other video's, her whole channel might be about telling the stories of others. There are reddit stories so this may not even be her tale. Relax.
@AnthonyRodriguez-zm6uv regardless of whether or not she is perfect the way he is acting is dangerous! He is throwing things and being overly aggressive. Greif is a strong thing that isnt any reason to fly off the handle and verbally abused someone who is also suffering the loss of their child. He isnt absolved of any of this behavoir!
So you should just divorce him because you’ve said it’s been a couple of years that the accident happened, so if it was maybe a year or 2 months I’d understand that he needs time but that much time and he’s still not tried to go to therapy at all like nah you gotta leave him. Doesn’t mean you don’t love him it just means he isn’t in his right mind anymore and until someone can get through to him or until he realises he needs help he’ll never change. An accident like that can change a person and maybe he’s feeling like she would leave him or blame him and that’s why he’s staying away from her. I doubt she blames him though it’s just a tragic accident and he shouldn’t feel guilty but he will. It sucks. This is why he needs help though. To grieve.
