Taking the time to role play and pre plan for a crucial conversation is a game changer when success is the desired goal. Detachment is a super power and most of the time we make much better decisions following a plan and pivoting when necessary then we do relying on emotional decisions and winging it in the moment. When progress is the priority, it always helps to plan!💪🔥🙌
My problem is that it's still dishonest. You aren't sparing 'Jamie' from having her feelings hurt down the line and it'll be an even bigger insult/injury/shock to her after you've been yet another person too polite to just tell her the truth and give her a moment to reflect. Just do it as kindly as you can and if she's mad -- well, she's not going to hurt you unless she's truly unhinged (and if she is, then why are we trying to be so diplomatic), so why obfuscate the real reasons? Reality always wins.
@@rickjones641 well said and one other thing to think about is how different a spec ops unit is from a office. In a spec ops unit your #1 commodity is your own image/reputation. A commander can't be embarrassed.In an office either the employee does her job or the problem goes to HR.
@@idsavo All of you, please take into account that here we are talking about giving an information that the project will be canceled. And there is always a REASON why. Would you allow to go with e.g. shitty project which will ruin your company's budget only because somebody cannot swallow rejection and stamps its feet like little girl after saying "no candies today"? Just like @michaelhowell5872 said - we don't give a F about Jaime, because she is not a REASON.
One of the most important things that pilots say is that the more stressful, hectic and dangerous a situation becomes, the calmer they get. That requires a lot of practical training/simulations so to rehearse and know exactly what and how to deliver a crucial message in such a corporate conflict is a good preparation and strategy to succeed.
For those that care, I have a gender-neutral alternative, that doesn't sound forced, for "manned", "overmanned" and "undermanned": "staffed", "overstaffed", and "understaffed". There are probably a few more variations. If you find this useful, you're welcome. If you don't, sorry for wasting about a second of your time.
A lotta hyperbole, there was an unruly, and underperforming employee. It was portrayed as acquiescing because she had a bad temper. The temper which was probably a mitigating factor. Something that should have been addressed before termination was imminent. She was enabled early on. Then was coddled when the time for honest assessment arose. Her progress should have been monitored, disciplining as it digressed. Leading to termination.
Sounds like a “development” area has been identified for Jamie and regular one-on-ones should be checking in on any progress that has been made. Don’t fail Jamie by dancing around or sugarcoating performance issues. Help Jamie overcome them.
The amount of effort involved with this is insane to me. "Jamie" needs to be fired or transferred to another department. Seems like there would be a lot of opportunity for that to happen.
The sad truth is that if these “Jamie’s were men they would be fired on the spot. The world is full of Jamie’s, they are commonly called Karens. They are harder to fire because they whine and act like victims whenever someone tries to hold them accountable. I have seen adult women denigrate, other associates in front of management in profanity laced tirades without a single hint of disciplinary consequences.
@@woodwarddlw You might be right but if everyone is walking on eggshells around them the whole team can suffer and grow less and less effective. Some people no matter how qualified, and intelligent are just sociopaths that can only work alone.
I couldn't make it through the video- I was thinking the same thing. "Jamie" needs to understand her role or fuck off. Take it from a union rep who's literally agreed with management 2 or 3 times in about a thousand meetings/confrontations.
All this mission control and role playing is to avoid be embarrassed. Just deliver the news. No need to care about her reaction or being worried about how it will make you look.
Disagree, prep will help the person delivering the news anticipate scenarios and help prevent the conversation escalating. Nothing to do with avoiding embarrassment.
@@mtb71 I really disagree. Let them escalate, let them blow their top. When you are focused on controlling their reaction, you waste time correcting the problem. Your job is to deliver the news in a calm but firm manner, where they go with it is up to them. Too many managers are so obsessed with their own image they're afraid to say vital feedback.
I’m not fully convinced because of military seal mindset and training that my freedoms are being protected more so. Things are going to get ‘hot’ but when a domestic person that is weak gets into it with you take the higher ground. Always. In the long term, what is it that you offer that will help? Temporary satisfaction? How confident is a seal that everyone else will fall in line even if you eat humble pie when your wrong? Listening to a trained fighter is great for survival but for long term overall wellness not so much. I respect the discipline but can’t bring myself to be included in this mentality. There’s no platform for the military. It endless monetary controls but our hearts and minds see through it.
But in order to do this, you have to get to know people to understand any weaknesses. You cant just come up to someone you know nothing about and expect the situation to turn out in your favor.
Pretty soon it’ll just be you and Dave over there and everybody else will have split. Because you never back down, even when you should. Leading by example, recognizing individuals’ grievances and offering them some kind of redemption and resolution is what keeps your team together. Otherwise, there will come a day when you’ll be wondering why you can’t find good people anymore or why nobody wants to work.
Seems like your beating around the bush; most of the time you should be genuinely honest with the person and let them know their deficiencies and help them improve vs coming up with an excuse to pacify them so you can avoid conflict.
I agree with you that you shouldn’t ignore under performance. However, It’s the specifics of this case. It’s not that they were deficient, it’s that they over manned the project. If you follow enough of Jocko stuff, you’ll see he doesn’t beat around the bush and placate staff. If they were incompetent or unethical etc. then the advice would be tailored differently. E.g. Hey Jamie, we’ll be pulling you off the project. I made a big mistake here, we’ve given you stuff you haven’t done before, and it’s just too much. That was our mistake, and we need to get you aligned up on those things your skills are tailored for. We want to get you realigned and getting after these activities, and we’ll be there to support you on this one to make sure you can get it done. Etc. Make it about you and your own failings, means you can own it and take control.
444❤ YOU are a cucumber that just came out of the fridge You are not there to be right You have zero attachment to the outcome You can walk out right now and you don’t give a damn You are there ONLY for the truth Integrity says All cards on the table both parties If they don’t put their cards on the table Put them on the table for them Sit back and let them explain their position in infinite detail Keep asking questions to get more and more detail After you have let them exhaust everything that they’re going to say You have all the ammunition you need And you have already won Because when you go You have all the data And all the logic And standing in front of you Is a hothead Ready to blow up YOU WIN 👁️
I don’t get if Jamie is being cut off the project for her bad temper or because her poor results or just because other reasons. If Jamie is being cut off because bad temper or because underperforming you here are actually avoiding to address the real issue. Is it really a good option? Who are you doing a favour to by omitting honest feedback?
This is good stuff.....practice makes perfect and rehearsing and scripting the message is smart. Also, when someone starts getting pissed, let them vent and hear them out. When they get done, they will respect you for listening, even if they don't like the bad news you are telling them.
It's a sign of experience. I've been in relationships like this, where the girl goes pretty much insane over small things. You have to have maximum emotional control and slowly bring in the opposite energy. You descalate, then turn the energy around slowly after giving the negativity enough space, without crossing any red lines of unacceptable behaviour, and then work then interaction to the emotional state where you want it to be. It's not easy. The second you lose your own emotional control, it's an avalanche unleashed. Working with women on teams is totally different from fighting the enemy on the battlefield. And guess what, most women these days I've seen are crazy roller coasters, and you've got to be prepared for it.
@@srinitaaigaura in my experience you can’t fix crazy. Jamie should be demoted to a roll that is more aligned with her skill set or should be let go. No drama, no escalation, just walking papers.
Wtf? Just let Jamie escalate as much as she wants and then fire her for conduct. If someone requires this much planning to take direction from management they can feck right off.
As Jocko would say, "These are lies you are telling yourself." If you're that busy as a manager that you can't take a couple minutes to gather your thoughts before delivering bad news to a subordinate, you aren't delegating enough stuff to your team.
It will never happen! I am supporting Donald Trump for president Which makes me a republican! I stand with Israel 🇮🇱 Which makes me human and quite clever actually I am betting on a winner. Gif is on Israel side too
The problem is the idiots in the world dont listen to this. Its all about them so these things dont work with the general public, especially in corporate settings
