WOMEN DON’T WANT KIDS | Women on TikTok explain why they are childfree | 

To the first lady, you can adopt at any time. I was adopted by a woman who really wanted to be a mother but had shit partners. She said "I have a lot of love to give and I want to be a mother and a man won't prevent me from achieving this" then she saw me at age 3 and the rest was history.

That first woman's story is heartbreaking. The ridiculous pressure and shame foisted onto women who don't have children, even if they are infertile or their partner is infertile is sickening and demoralizing. I really feel for this woman.

That first woman needs a huge hug. ♥️

When I was a little girl, my dreams were to be rich, have a nice penthouse in NYC, an amazing wardrobe and a Mustang…I traded the NYC penthouse for a Cali condo and the mustang for a challenger…but even then, just like now, there was NO DESIRE to have kids or get married. I wouldn’t even mother my baby dolls; they were audience members on my cooking talk show and nothing more 😂

I never wanted bio kids. I have chronic illnesses and did not want to pass on my genetics. My husband agreed with me even before we got married. I was 30 when we adopted our beautiful daughter. She is healthy and happy and so smart. No, we don't want any more children. I am proud of the women making their stand to do with their bodies as they wish! No more doing what "society" aka our families and friends want. My body My choice.

And if you don’t want children.. make SURE to protect yourself!! Not wanting children is OKAY

I stopped dating too. Mental health struggled and I finally feel peaceful in my life.

It's so sad that we have to justify what lifestyle we choose when that choice affects NO ONE. So unfair. I will also be child-free.

Your life would be a lot worse if you had kids with the wrong person! I have friends who are going through divorce, custody, lawyers, money, their partner has moved on with someone else, and their kids are only 6 and 8. My friend has to put up with all this crap until the kids turn 18. Can you imagine the stress? I used to want to have kids but I have a fertility issue and the right guy never showed up. Plus, some of the kids I have seen have horrendous behaviour and they expect presents and treats all the time and they have no freaking manners, either! If the opportunity came that I could have a kid and with the right partner, I'm not sure if I would want to go down that road now. My life is quite busy and fulfilling without kids. Don't give yourself such a hard time about not having a child, whatever the reason is. The birth rate is dropping globally because people want to enjoy their lives and they see parenthood as a hindrance more than anything.

I used to feel the need to explain that I wasn’t able to have kids and I don’t anymore. When ppl ask me, I just say nope proudly. The looks on their faces is priceless.

I’m the same as the first woman. I’m 48 now and haven’t dated in many years. I was so tired of getting hurt by men.

Kudos to all the ladies who live their lives as they choose. ❤

I feel as if men were more reliable there would be less women wanting to be chid-free

I'm child free also. I'm a high risk pregnancy first of all, and I don't want to risk my life for a child just for the sake of having a child. Besides, I'm a black woman and frankly the only black men I've met without kids already haven't been right for me. I won't date a man who has kids with someone else. If we really want children, we can adopt, they'll still call us MOM and love us. I keep a Nexplanon and I enjoy my hobbies.

I grew up in an abusive home. I choose not to have children for fear that I would have been an abusive parent.

I have a young daughter, and although this may sound paradoxical but I always tell her not to have children because I love her so much. To be honest, being a parent really wears me out and there are times I regret it immensely. I wish my daughter could just be herself and live life to the fullest, without having to sacrifice herself for someone else.

Reasons I am not having a kid: 1. I know I can't financially afford a kid. Plain and simple. 2. They're very low on my list of prioritities 3. I need my space at the end of the day. I work with kids all day, and I need quiet at the end of the day. 4. I'm selfish. I like the freedom of not having kids 5. I never really had the "gotta have kids" vibe go off 6. My family history in terms of mental health and physical health conditions. I already have PTSD, Major depression, Hashimoto's, disordered eating/eating disorder behaviors, high cholesterol (under control now), and I would have a STRONG possibility of passing down that stuff. 7. The thought of actually not being interested in my child and what they're doing. Due to my depression, I sometimes struggle with feeling genuine excitement, and kids need LOTS of that, especially when they are young, and the world is a whole new thing to them. 8. The stress and judgement I would recieve on raising my kid. As much as I want to say that we shouldn't be influenced by others, and what they have to think or say, we are. 9. Overstimulation....I get overstimulated by loud noises sometimes, and if my kid is screaming and crying, after I've been with kids all day who also scream and cry....nope. 10. Time. Kids are basically a life long committment, and I feel like I wouldn't be able to be my authentic self if I was always having to focus on them.

Heavy on the being able to afford them and its not just basics you need to consider can you afford your kids if they have special need? Can you pay for therapists and medications and all the thhings that may come with that for the rest of their lives? There is no guarantee that your child will be neurotypical can you afford what that would entail. These are thing parents dont think about until they have the child.

I'm 22 years old and single. I give up on relationships because men are too chaotic and dramatic af for me I love spending time on solitude a lot so I'd rather be single and happy rather than getting married and miserable.

Once, I heard a woman said..."You are worthless, as a woman if you can't kids" I took my time to educate her cos' i knew that was the spirit of patriarchy talking. The best, thing you can do for the world as a woman is not to have kids. The dis-advantages, is far more than the advantages. Most, importantly you will be saving innocent children the trauma of having to deal with a patriarchal society that is disorganized on every level. Children, are not protected let alone adults. So, what's the point of keeping the system in existence? I know that soon, men will start forcing women to bear children. If you haven't, seen the series "Handmaid tale" you should make out time to watch it. I feel, that movie is a prophecy cos' more women will stop bearing children.

I'm not having kids if I can't provide a better life than my single mother provided for me as an only child. Private schools from Pre-K till University; includes private tutoring for 6 years too Scheduled annual one month vacations... France, UK, Dubai, US.... Live in Nanny/Housekeeper and a chauffeur... We had two owned homes. Monthly allowance starting at age 10 All these happened while growing up in West Africa... I live in the States now... the future seems bleak enough

The last woman. I think about my mom having to be tied to my dad forever too because of me. I don't want that for myself.

How the prices are going up rent food everything I can’t imagine adding a kid into that mix rn . Ima live life and be the aunt still

For the first time in history women aren’t forced to be the homemaker and take care of the children, when there are other options besides this one, why are people surprised that people want different things?

after having three children and raising them as a single parent with no support from any other human I completely understand how humans are waking up and realizing they do not have the ability to raise happy confident children that have empathy and sympathy for others.

Women are the default parent. Kid is sick, call mom. Teenage lashing out, on mom. Hungry, call mom.

I don't even like kids I'd probably be one of those moms that end up in the news doing something horrible to her children; Like they can just stay home alone for a few hours right, what's the worst that could happen ?? 😅 Not to mention men are disappointing and I don't want to be the inevitable single mom. Plus I'll probably die of cancer and then my mom will have to take care of the child and she already raised 7 kids. My family already has enough descendants without my defective psychotic dna contribution.

My mother raised a stubborn child. I used to get the husband and kid questions a lot. My response don't want it and it's my business.

No matter how much you do for your kids it’s never enough. They will blame you for ruining their lives. Don’t have kids. Ps mine is 46 years old

27..Child free by choice...tried to date I consistently get told my reasons are not valid, that who will take care of me when I'm older, that I'm not normal, that I'm a feminist,some men purse me in hopes I'll change my mind or I might end up pregnant by chance etc... 😅People have the wrong notion that because you don't want kids that you hate them on the contrary I like kids but I like to return them to their parents and I really want to help low income families... It's not easy but I'm happy with my decision made it years ago. And I'm sticking to it... Don't get me wrong I've met great guys one I even contemplated changing my mind for but I noticed I was compromising a lot on my side what was he compromising for me so I called things quits and vowed to never do that again... I would still like a relationship /partnership... Someone to travel with etc...

Oh, and don't feel the pressure because more and more younger women are not getting married and having kids. So much so that in some countries the gov't is in a panic and have financial incentives to couples. I mean, even in China there are young couples who don't want kids! I'm Asian ... this is culturally abnormal! Which, I love.

I have children that I love with all my heart but I choose to remain single because like the first woman pointed out, it’s damaging to my mental health. I had children and my ex husband violated our daughter and I tried dating men but it’s just too exhausting and I rather focus entirely on raising my beauties.

To the first woman: there are a lot of women who (1) choose to not date any more and (2) choose to adopt. And they have wonderful, happy lives. One of my family members adopted a beautiful little boy. Nobody calls him the "adopted" cousin. We call him our cousin. Period. You don't have to share blood to be family. Also,pregnancy only lasts 9 months anyway; most of the mothering comes AFTER that nine months. Please consider adopting a little one to love on. There is a wonderful woman named Lisa Harper; you may want to google her name in quotes and adoption. In her early 50s, she adopted a little girl. She is having a wonderful time raising that little girl. Please look into it.

I’ve never had any biological children of my own, but I have a stepson. And let me tell you, kids are a negative in so many ways from a young age to adulthood. This child that is now an adult, is a narcissistic sociopath and made my life miserable. If I had to do it again, I wouldn’t only not have children biologically again, but I would certainly not marry someone with child/children. Just my experience and opinion.

Pregnancy , childbirth & dealing with an annoying crying screaming infant Isn’t some magical experience. I can’t stand It all, but I do adore older children. I mean toddlers & up. Infants though? Nah, I don’t see the hype

I never wanted to be a single mother - there was only ONE WAY to guarentee that.

Woman at 2:51. I have never had children and reason number one is why I never had children. Children change everything and require a lot of self sacrifice. Not for me!

I don’t want a son. I’ve seen how they turn out and I don’t want those problems. The matricide rates sealed the deal. So no kids cause I can’t risk it.

My aunt and uncle (my mom’s siblings ) are both childless. After my mom died from cancer, they were around to spend time with me and guide me through life. If they had their own kids, I would have truly been alone. It takes all kinds ❤️

I'm so sorry for your loss. I am childless, not by choice; and people have made assumptions and looked down on me. I am OK though, and you will be, too.

As a mom of 3 I absolutely commend you all. It takes so so much and my marriage went to shit after my last baby was born and I've raised my kids alone with the exception of my oldest kid for about 10 years. The woman speaking about people romatisizing seeing kids online and wanting what you see just online but she was correct. Its honestly super exhausting. Daily. Anyways I am so proud of you all, it is not necessary to have kids to exist or have a nice life. Society is different from 300 years ago where everyone basically had to have kids or you were shunned from community. Anyways, enjoy your lives everyone, seriously. Xo

Sad stories but it is better to not be a parent than be a bad one! There are way too many people who have kids but cannot take care of them. 🥺

Ive totally had that nightmare where im fully pregnant and i cant get an abortion 😩 I'm so stressed out. I wake up so relieved that i dont have kids and made the right decision for myself.

I am a very selfish person, that’s why I am choosing not to have kids. No child deserves to have a selfish parent. It’s a good thing I am choosing not to have kids.

More power to them ❤

I think women who don't want kids, shouldn't. Do what makes you happy. I've raised 3. They are exhausting. 😂

It’s ok to not be in a relationship or want kids

50. NEVER wanted kids, NEVER wanted to get married. I am reminded on a daily basis how good a decision that was and I hard times it is SO much better. It makes no sense, other then a generic coding, to think you need to have kids....it's generic....no.matrer how much you think you are deciding you want children, it's GENETIC!!

There is a reason why i only had one. I made damn sure it didnt happen again. Shes almost grown and shes a pretty cool person. She does not want kids. I am still with her dad. I have friends who all have had 3 plus kids each. I could not imagine.

I've already made up my mind not to have kids a long time ago when I really started to suffer pain and agony of all sorts I don't want to bring children here to suffer. I don't want to marry either because the husband will end up rejecting me too like I was rejected by every single person that I've ever met.

To that first woman… I hope you see this. I’m 48. I have had *horrific* relationships, marriages to monsters, etc. No kids. Trust me when I tell you that if you go to therapy and really dedicate yourself to healing, you will no longer feel like you’re missing out. And, anecdotally, once I felt truly healed and became whole and happy on my own, last fall, I organically met a man (in person! in the wild!) who is amazing. Wasn’t even looking for a man. And he has kids that I am looking forward to loving like my own. Don’t give up, sis. Families come in all shapes, sizes, and flavors. ❤

Not trying to contribute to overpopulation 😂😂 that lady lol My primary concern is that this world is dark and dingy. I think babies are safer in babyland where God looks after them. Not here, this place is a dark squatter camp and after listening to my mom talk smack about my dad all my life plus the fear of possibly dying during labour is enough to discourage me

I think I was around 25 years old when I asked my gyno to tie my tubes. She said I was too young. Hmmm I’m 25 years old. I’m old enough to vote and enter into a contract. She also said I could change my mind. I went to another gyno. He said no too. I am 57 years old. Guess what I don’t have??? KIDS! I knew then. I knew in my 30’s. And I knew in my 40’s that I did not want kids. When will we be heard? Now here we are in a place where women will be forced to have children. Women will decide to end their pregnancies the way it was done which is dangerous to their health. Or end up bleeding out from an ectopic pregnancy. But hey, it’s just a few dead women. I grew up with shitty role models. One was an alcoholic and a drug dealer. Oh and he was extremely physically abusive. In his eyes, I would never amount to anything. I was stupid too. The other parent chose this person as her partner and took his side, even though he beat the shit out of me and my mom. So my view of parenthood was fucked up. I stopped the generational trauma and I am so happy I listened to my inner self and did NOT have children. Lastly, I am graduating with my masters in about 4 weeks. So yeah, not so stupid after all 🖕🏽👊🏽✌🏽

I very much agree with the second woman. I want to spend my money on ME, I want to buy whatever I like and travel and shit, and I want sleep and free time. I don't want my life to only consist of parenting and working, I saw what it did to my mom. No time for hobbies or friends, money worries, everything is always about the kid... No thank you

If they don't pay your bills don't pay them no mind. Sissy that walk.

Why is the first woman’s story part of this compilation? She doesn’t “not” want kids. She does want them and missed an opportunity to have them for whatever reason and is grieving.

Reading through the comments and yes I agree, some of you really shouldn't have children

Why would you feel the need to explain one of your most intimate decisions? Is nobody's effing business.

Imo if your number 1 reason not to have kids is "not being able to drink", it should make you pause and think... We are also childfree, but alcohol is none of our reasons. I hope her list is out of order.

i feel for the first woman so much :( i’m not at her age as yet, i’m 30 but I feel i will end up like her 😞 it’s beyond devastating to grieve for a child you never got the chance to meet. i been wanting kids since my early 20s and i work with kids for a living so everyday i constantly have to deal with parents, colleagues constantly wonder or ask why i never married or had kids as yet. I’ve tried but my luck with dating has been awful. All of them wasted my time and dating has mentally ruined me that I just feel like giving up because i can longer put myself thru it again. i was in one abusive relationship for 3 years and one man dated me for 4 years just to leave me for an arranged marriage.

I’m a man and I’ve been single for years No kids

9:04 and the last lady is telling the truth.

Yeahhh thats another thing is if the father turns out to be shi, youre going to have to deal with him for the rest of your life like no thanks id rather die c:

I can confirm the dental issues after pregnancy. I needed several fillings. Also, bladder control is half what it used to be.

that first lady ! shes hurt over the time she spent on the wrong one , the trust she lost - not so much the kids

And what about the woman that are raped and forced to have the kid and don’t want nothing to do with it?

Jesus turned and said to them, “Daughters of Jerusalem, do not weep for me; weep for yourselves and for your children. 29 For the time will come when you will say, ‘Blessed are the childless women, the wombs that never bore and the breasts that never nursed!’ 30 Then “‘they will say to the mountains, “Fall on us!” and to the hills, “Cover us!”’ Luke 23, 28-30

Also. All these women who have kids, they arent even raising the kid. The phone and teachers at school are.

This is the experience of many of us

Bravo, ladies!

Tbh I find it fine, just don't go shaming those who want to be mothers, because apparently that's a problem on Twitter and tiktok, just because you got shamed for not wanting kids, doesn't give you the right to shame mothers who weren't the ones who shamed you.

To the 1st woman and every woman out there. When I was around 25, I started thinking about having kids without a man. Side note: I have a great father and genuinely happy parents! My dad never dropped me on my mom and pretended to work late; he was always present, and even if he had to work a lot, he would compensate for it a few months/years later when his business took off, and he could spend all his free time with us. If my dad could go on paternity leave with me, I feel like he'd stay home with me for years, lol. So. Dear ladies, please don't base your lives on a man you haven't met yet. Once you turn a certain ago (which is 35 for me), please consider having kids of your own. And yes, you'd need a lot of money and possibly safety nets and help from family and friends. But the point is, don't miss out on your goals and dreams, children-related or not, because of anyone else: not a man, not a friend, not a parent, not an employer - NOT ANYONE. Also, considering the divorce rates and the unofficial "I'd like to divorce, but I can't because of kids/money/social judgement" rates... Maybe it's better to be a single parent? I've always felt like single parents get a bad wrap.

What judgement are these women talking about. I always hear the opposite.

As people age, people without a spouse or children whether they be men or women are always in a vulnerable position. I feel sorry for men and women that don't want to be married or have children cause life changes as you age and we all will need someone.

i use to be like these women 🤦😂

This compilation seems to have been put together by someone who hates childfree women. It's as if someone wants to tarnish them as being either pathetic failed wannabe mothers or selfish women who boast about their selfishness. The childfree women I know are neither of these things. They are just women who chose to be childfree and are happy with their choice and live full and active lives surrounded by people who cherish them and whom they cherish in return. Don't fall for this propaganda where depressed or off-the-wall women are used to misrepresent the majority. They are not the majority. Be who you are, choose what makes you happy, and surround yourself with like-minded people. Only then can you truly be happy.

I’m a 29 year old man and the reason I don’t want to have kids is because my parents were piss poor and I don’t want to do the same to my kids. I have my own issues that I still need to work out. Maybe once I go to therapy I’ll change my mind. On top of that, having kids is hard as fuck. My sister has two, a 4 and 5 year old, and it’s just too much for me to handle. I think by now, with all of the technological advancements society has made, it should be a cake walk to have kids. Having children is the most important thing for the human race. It should be priority number one to have infrastructure to support having kids and raising them.

Women constantly blame them being single-do-to-bad-choices on men, the patriarchy, and everything other than herself why, because 🦹🏾‍♂️ Responsibility & 🦹🏽‍♀️Accountability are like women's comicbook Arch Nemesis 🦸🏾‍♀️

Honestly get off social media 😂

No kids = no husband.

The most incredible experience a woman was created for is to give life, create a human being, love & be loved. “My life is all about me” is very empty in the long run. Keep telling yourself these lies/misrepresentations to justify your choices- just remember you had the ability & you chose to destroy it.

My Mother Had Many Children & Kept Her Hour Glass Figure/Flat & Pretty Stomach. I Had One And My Stomach Was Ruined.

Ewww, Glad he showed his pervert side (to the amazing first woman). And glad they didnt have kids, because he is disgusting to go with a young chick, and the kids would be traumatized by it. And sadly, there are so many cheaters who go behind their partner's back without them knowing, to be with a much younger girl, it's disgusting. She really dodge a bullet there! Never feel sorry for not having kids!

Let's be real...motherhood is all consuming for women. Almost everything falls to the mom, even in today's so called modern society. Women end up completely sacrificing themselves to raise their kids for at least the next 20 years, possibly longer. The man may or may not help and many men, even the good ones, don't share an equal amount of responsibility. The woman is still expected to do the lion's share of work or else she's labeled as selfish or a bad mom. Not a good arrangement for anyone except for the man. 🙄

I’m only 23 and have opted out of dating entirely. It is so damaging to my mental health because so many people do not work on themselves. As a woman you’re expected to care for men because poor them, but the moment you don’t make them the centre of your world you’re a bad person. Most of these men don’t care which is why they feel comfortable allowing you to deal with their shortcomings. How am I supposed to see these people as potential mate when they make life harder? Why would I want to produce a second version of them for me to take care of? Marriage and motherhood sounds like my version of a living nightmare. It took me three years to recover from my first and only relationship with a male. Never again, I’m addicted to my alone time and my peace.

please never stop posting these videos. all of these experiences are valid and childfree people deserve to also have a platform to share.

You're NOT SELFISH if you don't want kids!! The selfish thing is to have a kid who you know you can't care for!

Our society is also judgemental for women who did have kids and are not in a current relationship. Women get judged and shamed either way unfortunately.

I am a mother. I loved being a mother, but I want to be really clear. DO NOT have children unless you are going into it knowing how much work it is, how you can't be yourself for decades, and that knowing all this you still absolutely want to be a mother. Do NOT have a child if you have any reservations. And the women who say that it's all going to fall on you and not the man in your life, this is unfortunately true.

As a woman my main reason to be childfree is that no man deserves me to go through 9 months of pain and suffering just to have 50% of his genes when he never contributed anything to the whole process. Adding to that, he can still decide to get up and leave at any moment

There is an interview I saw a divorce lawyer said If you are a woman stay single but if you are a man get married and that stayed with me 🥰

Feel for the first women she childless not child free 🆓.

For the first woman, have a conversation with your sibling, it’s not your nieces place to speak to you in that manor. You don’t have to explain yourself to anyone when it pertains to this issue. Especially children.

I will carry on NO m¤le's legacy! Not through birthing a child or through marriage. My life is for me and I've known this since I was a teenager. I'm 49 now with zero regrets for turning down marriage proposals and staying childfree.

I dont want kids because I'm tired of taking care of people. I've been caring for people for far sooner and far longer then I should've. I'm still caring for people now and I'm 34 and still waiting for my life to start! And then people are still saying I should have kids because "its a different experience". It's not I cared for my grandpa until the day he died. In that time I changed diapers, gave him baths, made sure he got to doctors appts, etc. I dont want to take care of people for the rest of my life. I am waiting for the day I can come home after work to a quiet house and not have to worry about making sure everyone has eaten or taken their medications.

Who cares if they don't want children? That is THEIR choice and not anyone else's business. People need to keep their noses out of other people's lives and shut their traps.

I am 37 and childfree and Married. I came to the conclusion I was better off a Aunt than a Mother. There is responsability that comes with Motherhood that just never appealed to me. Being a Mother isn't for everyone and anyone who tells me anything about it,ends up embarassed and mouth wide open so my surrounding knows better. Women need to stop letting society hate the lives they live and the skin they are in. Enough is ENOUGH. Nobody will be there if you have one and struggle.

First Lady, oh how I wish we could sit over a cup of coffee. I am 64, never married, no kids and absolutely no discomfort, much less shame over it. Take some time to really get to know yourself, know who you are, what you stand for and work to be the best person you can be. When you know and respect yourself, your opinion of yourself is the one that matters - not the opinions of a bunch of strangers or society. Why would you care what a bunch of strangers who don’t give a rats patootie about you think? they do not matter in your world and you don’t matter in theirs. Be proud of who you are, you are so much more than a baby maker.

I am a Mom, and I chose to be. To you that aren't mothers, you saved me when I was growing up. My mother's friends that were childless, and my aunts that were childless, were 2nd Moms to me. We need your guidance. We need your friendship. And, you are awesome, smart, and level-headed. Ty.❤

I just turned 49. I kind of didn’t want kids in my 20s. I thought love and family would “happen naturally” at some point, but it never did. I did not have positive relationships or positive dating experiences, and I knew I didn’t want to be a single parent. I don’t regret being child free, but it deeply saddens me that I have never met “the one”. Loneliness is tough, but deep down I know that being in an unhealthy relationship is worse.