You Are Who You've Been Looking For by Adam Roa 

This poem changed my life

This poem speaks to my daughter. Twelve years old, struggling with depression and suicidal ideation and an eating disorder, she read this poem to me and my wife today in an adolescent inpatient facility. It speaks to her deeply. I thank you from the bottom of my heart, Adam, for giving her another voice speaking words she needs to hear. She keeps a printout of this in her journal, there for whenever she needs it.

You are who you've been looking for. So stop looking for more unless you are looking in the mirror because it is about time for you to see clearly that: You are who you've been looking for. And that empty feeling you got, that hole in your chest you only got that feeling because you think you are not blessed with everything you need. You see we live in a consumerist society which means they need you to buy stuff and the easiest way to sell it is to tell you 'You are not enough'. Buy this car, you will get girls. Buy the bra, you will get guys. And we are seeing is so much that we start believing these lies. But the truth is: the make up they are selling to make you feel prettier is the same make-up you buy to stop feeling shittier about this lie they keep telling you that 'You are not enough'. And what about the movies we watch or the shows on TV The more I watch the more I see 'I need you to complete me'. And yes, love is the answer, love is the key but if you can't love yourself how could you ever love me. And loving yourself what does that even mean like massages and selfies and that sort of thing? Because the more I think about it the more it feels weird, I was always been taught that self-love is something to be feared. I've been taught that arrogance is bad and vanity, it's not good. And even my bracelets are telling me to act like Jesus would. So what should I do? How should I act? I am supposed to love myself but how do I even do that? Well, I got a trick that I pick up from a friend. Who noticed that I was quick to defend her when she would say something negative about herself. She would say 'I am so dumb' and I would say 'You are so brilliant' She would say 'I am so weak' and I would say 'You are so resilient' And when she said 'I feel ugly' and I said 'You look beautiful', she asked me why I was so dutiful filling up her cup constantly and yet treating my own cup so irresponsibly. Because when I looked in the mirror my voice was quite clear “You are ugly, you are too thin, your hairlines receding, you got a pimple on your chin” And that was when she gave me a piece of advice that changed my life: She gave me a hug and she said 'Treat yourself like someone you loved' Treat yourself like someone you loved. Now, I've been standing but I needed to be sitting because I couldn't believe that I had been letting myself keep forgetting that I was who I've been looking for. And deep in my core I knew it was time to stop looking for more until I could look through all my fear and look into a mirror and see clearly that the man looking back at me was the only one who can make me happy, and I am already enough. And I am not any more special or unique than you that is why I am here to speak to you 'You are already enough'. And when you start to see that you will start to be that. Your world will get brighter, your load will get lighter and you see that with life you can be a lover and not a fighter. And that life... you deserve it. Because you are worth it. And there is no point in letting yourself keep forgetting because no matter what you say or do: 'You are perfect'. As of today I hope I leave you with a direction correction away from the flaws you see in our reflection. They aren't flaws to me they are simply protection against all the doubts you have of your perfection. So start today, take a good long look in the mirror and say 'I am who I've been looking for'

every time i watch this and he mentions how he treats his cup irresponsibly, i get chills. every time.

The Dr. Suess of SELF COMPASSION.

Be a lover, not a fighter Treat yourself like someone you love

‘And yes love is the answer, love is the key, but if you can’t love yourself, how could you ever love me.’ One of my fav lines.

Monday Feb 12 74 yrs old 40 yrs clean and sober and still need to hear this poem right now and probably daily along with 12 steps ,helping,others,prayer,meditation,therapy,healthy food,god,service,fresh air and new people places and things and continual healing from a searingly hopeless disease! Linda S in sf

This poem made me cry, it changed my life... im watching it over and over

“Treat yourself like someone you loved.” This hit so hard, and there is so much truth and depth in this one small sentence. I love this because we are so quick to judge ourselves and look down upon ourselves. I watched this at work and I started tearing up because this is so deep. So true, so thank you. I am forever watching this on my hard days💛🌻

Love is the answer. Love is the key! But if you can't love yourself, how can you ever love me? I love this poem!! ❤❤❤

Confirmed! We have a prophet Among Us... Preach brother

It actually makes so much sense!!!

I’m crying ❤ listening to this. I’ve watched it before and i always cry because it speaks the truth of my soul.❤ Thank you 🙏 Adam for showing me that I am enough. ❤

So special Adam. Thank you 🙏🏼

My teacher showed this to my class at the end of the day and I almost cried. This message is super strong and changed the way I viewed the world.

YES Thank you Adam Roa

At 25, I realize that I don't know how to love myself. I am still clueless of how I wanted to be loved. But this shed the light to my path way back to home, leading back to myself. This is the first step where I believe I can find my true self, my worth, and of how can I love myself. I'm leaving my cocoon, stepping out of my comfort zone. 😳👊 Every step little by little will not hurt me. It will be hard but will be bearable. 💪

Brilliant and Beautiful!🐾🌟💋

I found this poem three years ago. It has helped me to get through a lot. I’ve been reading it every time I’m feeling self conscious, depressed, anxious, like I want to end it. But I read it and hear it. And life seems a bit better. Thank you so much for this

I just LOVE, Love, Love this poem. I also Love his IAm Enough Poem. 🥰

Treat urself as u treat some one u loved thats all wow so life changing

Okay..... Now I am binge watching your channel and WHAT. IS. THIS. Adam, wow. You are a poet. You are a unicorn. You are... damn, need I go on? You already know it all. Thank you for this. Have it bookmarked for my melancholy, uninspired days. much love, Marina

THE BARS THIS MAN HAS

Wow, Wow, Wow, Wow, Wow!!!!! Life changing!!!!!!

Well I have no idea who you are but I'm definitely in love with you.

I live with chronic depression and social anxiety - these 2 things have made it difficult for me to make friends & maintain relationships. Last spring I went through a rough breakup that almost broke me. My life was flipped. Most days are pretty heavy for me. I try to bury myself in work so as not to think about things, but the mind goes where it wants. 9 months after the breakup, and I still haven't figured out how to "get out there" and be social again. It's just not in my nature. However, every single time I'm feeling like I've hit rock-bottom, I watch this video. A couple of months ago, I put post-its up all over my home with quotes from the poem. They help. Thanks Adam

I don't add a lot of comments to videos. I'm just one to watch and move on. But I wanted to say something. This video triggered a change in my life. People have been telling me my whole life similar things to this - love yourself, believe in yourself, etc. But I've gone through my 50 years pretty much not loving or even liking myself. Your message came at a time and in a way that really made me look at myself. And change. I've realized that I am who I've been looking for my whole life. Thank you

Never heard the truth about loving yourself been said so powerfully ... Thank you Adam

This poem made me feel like I wasn't worthless and I started to cry because I've never really been happy and happiness is the best feeling I've ever felt and I hadn't felt it since my mom died in a car accident and my dad said I was a piece of shit and I didn't deserve to be born and that I was a disgrace to the world and I shouldn't have been born but now I know he was wrong and this poem made me feel loved again thank you Adam Roa you have changed my life

Our Sociology lecturer made us watch this, in class, and as a poet, I was so intrigued by this, and wanted to know more of your works. This is beautiful! ❤️

@Adam roa we want to see always like that this energy is amazing👏

One of the best poem of my life I love to listen in morning after bed from 1 year this is amazing...

I have seen this vid many times and its still amazinv every time.

I’ve watched this 4 times now i believe. And i cry every single time.

glad people not aware of this realization can move their focus for only what brings them fulfillment, life goals,and real change, the world was always routing for you, just not in methods and 3experiences we stereotypically look back at like a tv show. But time shows us this.

Our creator, is the one that we are looking for......

I watch this every once in while to keep me in check

In Frozen 2, when Elsa’s mother tells her “You are the one you’ve been waiting for,” and Elsa’s smiling through her tears, I always get overwhelmed. That was one of the most impactful moments in my life, sitting there in the theater and hearing that. Now, sitting here listening to this, I’m smiling through my own tears. Thank you.

Watched this when it first came out 3 years later still find myself coming back to remind myself. Thank you for this(:

From insta to these channel glad

I watch this everyday and make me perfect

BRAVO!! ADAM ROA... You are as wise as a 100~ yr old Gentleman, You are a Beautiful Soul... Much Success and Blessings from Jesus & God Above

🥺 had only heard sound bites on tiktok but very powerful this!

Mindblowing! Thank you for your inspiration

Oh wow beautiful love your energy 🦋

It's heaven on earth when you hear his words. A miracle, life is something wonderful and still we don't know it.

I love me and I love you Adam!

"Treat your self like someone you love" This phrase has been my go to when i lost a close friend who has been with me since back then. So i took care of myself and everytime i feel the longing i repeat this phrase.

I'm not gonna lie, I thought poetry was a dead art. You crushed this man. Great job. I'm a fan for life.

Amazing! So true

Thank you beautiful being. Your poetry connects me to myself and my truth in such deep, profound and meaningful ways. Sending so much love your way from South Africa ✨💚❤💙🤗🤗🤗

I watch this video atleast 3 times a week

I can not believe that I have lived over four years without hearing this poem. I recently came across a TikTok with this sound. It truly changed my life and brought me to tears. Lately, my mental health has been at its worst, though, these words that I have put up on my bedroom wall reminds me every day that I am enough. Thank you, Adam. This poem truly saved my life.❤

Adam Roa, just so you know I'm a therapist that works with children, teens, young men and women. Whenever we discuss self-compassion and self-love, this is always the 1st place I start. I've shared with so many people who needed to hear this and colleagues alike. You've touched so many more lives than you'll ever know. Thank you for this message 💕

I am shocked that this video only has 400k views because this video changed my life and now i always have a smile on my face...... POWER OF WORDS...

I saw this 2 years ago during a long phase of self discovery Adam. It made me cry and played a big part in finding my self esteem. Thank you brother I have a lot of love for you for this.

I was constantly trying to impress others while showing no care for myself. I hated myself for my looks. The poem made me realise that I need to understand and love myself to the fullest first. This poem really helped me to accept who I am.

Performances like these are why I’ve fallen in love with reading and making poetry. A good poem can bring so much out of you

This is why we need more people like you this is brilliant

I wish I can hug you bro. You words help me a lot. May God bless you and your family :)

I may need to listen to this every single day. ❤❤

Every single line of the poem have the impact🙌

Worlds best speech ever

Hail yourself! #LoveFeelsBest

When you said “treat yourself like someone you love” I swear my heart stopped for a split second because I realized how much I criticize myself. This poem was amazing, you’re amazing, keep up the good work and thank you.

Wow wow wow.....I'm speechless......💞💞💞 you are just wow Adam

This has so much depth and truth and has changed my entire out look on life

The best poem on self love man Love you

Eye opener, thank u sir

I like you poetry its make me love my self ... thanks

Love you, Adam.

Thank you!!!!

I LOVEE THIS SM❤️‍🔥

I get chills everytime I watch this! ✨ I'm that to have seen this in person. It was just as powerful that day. ✨

This is beautiful and it’s what SO many of us need to hear and to live!

Wow! That is epic! I wish I had heard it years ago. I wish everyone I know had heard it years ago too. So, so good...

I was such a different person before I watched this .. now I have been watching it for a year and it makes me see life so different now.. recently I had a friend who was down on life and not sleeping so I sent them this video, it helped them so much... Thanks Adam 👍 and well-done

still changing lives four years later thank you Mr. Roa ❤

L’oteal! You are worth it!

For the first time in the past 3-4 years I got to see myself clearly in the mirror, it is also the first time in my life I said I am enough. For as long as I can remember, I've always thought of myself as a machine rather than a human being. Id tell myself everything needs to be done perfectly, no mistakes allowed which eventually led to unnecessary anxiety, trust issues and self hatred. But this video made me truly wake up. Thank you Adam

Thank you very much bro. The words you spoke are true and truthful words are surely MAN'S WAND. THANK YOU. I have watched this video around 100 times. Still watching.

You're lyrically astounding

Powerful ❤️

Adam, thank you ❤

I'm not perfect. I'm just imperfectly perfect.

Love you Adam....for you made me love me more and more

I will listen to this every morning, every night and every time I doubt myself. 🥰

thank you so much for this poem

Thank you soooo much Adam, this is the by far most impressive and inpiring self love speech I eve r heard in my life! Short but right away to the point - and authentic - thats the way I love it!! And on top of it, its a poem - incredible nice!!!

3 years later and this is still my number#1 go to

Life changing... Thanks Adam Roa!

Love this

I'm 17 and I never knew how much I've needed to hear this ❤

Made me cry I'm 12 and I have hated myself from when I was 11 and I'd cry abt it every night this has changed my life forever thank you so much 😭😭😭😭❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

I saw this on instagram some months ago and it instantly changed the way I view things. Now I'm back because I needed the same change again, and this time I want to say thank you. You've made an impact on so many people, and I know I will come back to hear these words again. Thank you.

Wow, what a bucket of ice water on my psyche! A therapist friend once said most of his job was done when he made people realize that they treated STRANGERS better than their self. The great Quentin Crisp said: "Neither look forward where there is doubt, nor backward where there is regret. Look inward, and ask not if there is anything outside that you want, but anything inside you have not yet unpacked."

I got chills. So powerful. Thank you

Powerful! Really touched me! Correct timing!

This is true, thank you.