You all knew this was coming. Listen to the ending song in full, if you dare: • Elton John's 'Tiny Dan... Follow me on Twitter: / kylekallgren Support me on Patreon: / kkallgren
Fun fact: Sir Elton John is actually a gnome with a rare form of gigantism. It gets left out of most biographies for some reason, but it goes some way to explaining this movie.
This is the only logical trajectory of all Shakespeare adaptations. Anything less than the presence of a tank in the narrative out of nowhere will be considered subpar at most.
An accurate version of this movie could be great tho: It's garden gnomes, but they talk with the bard language and actually fight and kill each other. At the end of the story the homeowner comes home to find his garden trashed, with two shattered gnomes covered in poison in his front porch. It would be an interesting surreal experiment.
"None of this information will enrich your life in any way." Au contraire, this life-enriching nonsense is EXACTLY why I come to you Professor Kallgren.
I can never know that information is useless or not until such a time that I require it. If I have once benefited from knowing that the resonant frequency of your eyeballs is about 18Hz, and that loud noise at this frequency just beneath the range of human hearing can cause you to hallucinate because it deforms your body's tissues, then I will not doubt that the history of gnomes will one day be of use.
It’s staggering to me how Kyle, in his depression, is able to create such professional and even transcendent work as this-editing especially. Don’t get yourself hurt, sir. I’d prefer you to be around for a long time, not be a star burning brightly for a short amount of time.
[Sees video title] What?! Who would be so stupid, so crazy, so unbelievably desperate-- [Sees it's Kyle] ...so brilliant and amazing and patient enough to watch this movie!
Oh, Kyle. It may not do much, but have a virtual hug. Your videos regularly help me fight back depressive slumps, and for that, I'd like to thank you sincerely. I hope you'll find your way out of this unpleasant episode soon! There are better times waiting for you ♥️
Hope you're doing okay Kyle, want you to know that you're videos have entertained, informed & inspired me for the past several years, and I always look forward to seeing more content from you, because you really are one of the most unique & insightful media analysts out there! And for the record, I did not want this for you. All I wanted was Pan's Labyrinth: Cinema Antifa.
It's been a few years since I saw this movie with my family, mostly out of boredom and probably avoiding seeing something worse, but I remember finding one shout out to the original text I found pretty cute: the house that is the central setting is a duplex. It's literally... a house divided. Womp womp woooooomp.
My favorite story about this movie is that it was originally being produced by Disney Animation, but once John Lasseter was promoted to be the new head of the studio and he started taking a look at all the existing projects, he reviewed Gnomeo and Juliet and asked the staff “why are we making this movie?” Nobody could answer. Project canceled and shuffled off to a different studio.
I feel like the world has been depressed lately (me included). Kyle, your words soar above such mediocrity. They raise hearts and smiles. We care about you, and send virtual good wishes. And may you never have to watch ‘Sherlock Gnomes.’ PS I’d wondered about ‘Bowdlerisation.’ I learned something from this video. (My degree is in English Literature, and I’ve watched Shakespeare in Stratford several times.)
"Hey Patrick Stewart, would you like a small part as the statue of Shakespeare in a cartoon adaptation of one of his most famous plays depicted by-" "Why yes, I *do* like money."
Sherlock Gnomes is one of the best Sherlock Holmes movies ever. It has, hands down, the best depiction of a 'mind palace', which in turn is the best way to follow Sherlock's deduction - and doubles as an excellent joke when Sherlock retreats to his mind palace to zone out.
I've been watching you for years and honestly I just wanna say your videos matter. You are unlike anyone else on this hell-site, and your ideas, your honesty, your commentary and range of subjects inspire me so much. I would like to join in the cybernetic hug and tell you that you and your work are so, so valued. Thank you for being you.
You are fantastic. Nine years and you're still fantastic. The information you're able to dig up always astounds me and I really do find educational, and always wish that my brain could actually retain all of the amazing things that you teach me. Even from a product as mediocre as this you're able to dredge up so much. Never stop being you, you are always amazing.
Kyle, I love your work. Even your most bare minimum effort videos make me happy. Someday, I hope you can find the passion in these works again. I think you are more influential and interesting than you give yourself credit for. Sincerely, A longtime fan.
I've been a fan of your channel for a long time and I sincerely enjoy your content whenever it comes along. I've watched many of your videos hoping to gain insight on films and themes I would've never come across in the mainstream. You find beauty in the madness, and remind me to look closer at things I would've only glanced at so that I could appreciate what they truly were. Take all the time you need. Take care of your mental health and happiness. That should come first above everything.
Mediocre work, I consider myself entretained. Just kidding. I love your work Kyle. I hope you are doing well and that depression doesn't haunt you as badly. You are a professional and a winner, and worthy of praise and happiness.
I'm a new subscriber. I subscribed a few weeks ago, and have spent that time binge watching every video on your channel. All I can really say is, thank you. For somehow managing to be thought provoking, accessible, and entertaining in all things.
Not to invalidate your right to an existential crisis, but fwiw your content has always been intellectually stimulating and interesting and cool to me no matter what type of media or whatever you're talking about!
I missed you, my man. Thanks for somehow finding meaning and education in this otherwise painfully average production. I always feel more enthused about all kinds of work after hearing your thoughts and following your recommendations. Out of film school, your show is something that makes me excited about films again. And of course, it is my main Shakespeare fix. We're all pulling for yah.
As someone who has battled depression and seen Gnomeo and Juliet I must say... Dude, switch your meds, cuz if this average bit of fun bothers you this much it says more about you than anything else.
Oh god, he went into an extensive depression episode over this. Now I feel bad. Go watch the deepest arthouse film you can find, Kyle, just to wash out all the mediocrity.
You mean quite a bit more than a forgettable children's movie. Your work has been a formative influence on my life, and whether you think you're much smarter than other people or not, I have a much greater love and appreciation for art than I would had I been left to mere plothole-picking and bad jokes that 'film-crit RU-vid' was at the time I found your body of work. And for that, thank you. Thank you for being so nice that one time I met you at a con. Thanks for continuing to work even when the depression creeps up again, I know exactly how difficult that is. Thanks for helping me find the sublime in everything I watch.
It wouldn't even have occured to me to ask for this. I kinda hoped he'd stray into the arena of animation (GOOD animation, not this market-driven crap). Not necessarily anime, as that's too obvious and glutted a market, but to hear him discuss Secret of NIMH or Watership Down in a serious, critical fashion would be amazing.
The machine continues to turn. The likes are produced. (also this made me both snort in laughter and also hit a bit too close to home....so well done, you. Hope you're being kind to yourself in ways other than 2048)
Wow, Kyle, even watching the tiny bits of this movie with your contemptuous voice over made the 7 and a half minutes seem longer than it was, I can't imagine having watched it several times. Thanks for taking that bullet for us.
Kyle, even your lowest-quality work is far superior to this nonsense. I'm sorry it sent you into a depressive episode. I hope you feel 100% better soon.
I had to come back here to see if anyone remembers this movie since I really liked it younger- We all just have those moments where you remember some weird things in your past
Nice! I remember watching Gnomeo and Juliet back when I was only 12 years old and it wasn't until I was in high school a year or two later that I read the actual Romeo and Juliet.
Please feel hugged, loved and - for whaever it is worth - supported. If you think it might help and wont damage you too much financially, take time off, take care and - please stay with us.
The dance party at the end of kid's movie actually isn't so far from the original material... as it was intended to be performed. At the end of a theater play, the actors come back on stage for a final salute. It reminds the audience that, even though the characters are dead, it was all a play - it helps the audience go back to the real world. And I think it's a useful part of the performance, especially for children. Movies don't have that - but they can recreate the effect with a final dance party (or a gag reel).
I always love your content, but I hope it doesn't prove too much of a toll. I hope you'll find your center and feel better. As far as depression ever stops, I hope it will for you
With only that scene in the bathtub in Lindsay's video about Freddie Got Fingered you have surpassed all that Gnomeo & Juliet has done for the world. All the heaps of thoughtful, insightful, thought-provoking and fascinating critique you have done has value beyond measuring. Your existence is not only worthy and meaningful, but important. I do not know you, and I probably never will, but I love you Kyle. I wish you peace of mind. I'm glad every time I get to see something from you, whatever it may be.
I did not know this was made by Rocket Studios, which in turn, was made by Sir Elton John's making. I did not know this, and now I don't know what to think.
Hi Kyle. I hope things start heading on the up and up soon! I know how much it sucks to have month defined by 2048 usage (I also use it as a coping/distraction method, but on an 8x8 board). I don't know if these words will count for anything coming from a stranger, but you are just as much of a valid and valuable person whether or not you feed the content machine each month. (though as someone who personally enjoys your work and has learned a lot from it, I'm glad that you do!) Here's a virtual hug, hang in there, buddy. *Hug!*
@@Amitlu I believe it's fan made (not official) but it works the same way! Also, because the board is so large it's basically impossible to lose and turns into a kind of idle game that you can tap away at during boring lectures or while watching videos... I had a game going for 3 years until my mom's cat walked over my keyboard last month and overwrote it. D': Here's the version I play: cyberzhg.github.io/2048/
I also play 2048 to distract myself during anxious and depressive episodes, and I'm not sure to feel proud or ashamed that my high score is much higher than Kyle's. Much love to you, man.
You were recommended to me by "they." I have one video essay under my belt. I'm looking at as many of yours and LFTS as possible. There are more, but I do appreciate all I've seen from you two thus far, and though I'll do my best to have my own voice, you make it tough not to copy, steal, jack, imitate, and endlessly fawn. Cheers!
also you're not just one of many, you're very special to all of us who love your content specifically so please don't be too hard on yourself and feel better soon
The concept of decorating ones garden with figurines is actually even older than the Roman empire. The ancient Greeks actually decorated their gardens with figurines called a Pirapus, named after a minor god of vegetables, and were said to bless and protect gardens. Being short, ugly and bearded, they bore a good resemblance to modern garden gnomes. They wore a phrygian cap, which resembles the hats worn by garden gnomes. However the Pirapus had one major difference from garden gnomes: a huge wang. So picture a garden gnome with a slong long enough to be a walking stick, and you have a good idea what a Pirapus statue looked like.
Kyle your work raises above mediocrity, after every work of yours I walk away entertained but more importantly educated and with a new appreciation for art
That this is the capstone to a month's depression speaks volumes to your capacity for wit, that even when all enthusiasm for your work has run dry, you still find a good humor I am happy to support. Kyle, this video is no conscious eye-opening work of art like P R E T E N T I O U S nor it a giddy gleeful romp of fun like Beauty and the Beast (GOD can ya sing) but, to be honest, I'd be insane to expect such of anyone following such strife. We can sprint, we can dance, we can leap, but if we stop moving it's hard to keep going after. I'll settle for a casual walk through this mediocre garden. And also kick some grass.
Once Kyle said, “Dear RU-vid viewing audiences...” and then the title of the movie popped up I swear I thought his next line was going to be, “I hate you” in the most sardonic tone imaginable lol
Gnomeo and Juliet, distributed by Walt Disney Studios Motion Pictures through the Touchstone Pictures label, is my favorite romantic comedy of all-time. I love it!
Can I just say that the mp3 to midi conversation of Tiny Dancer playing at the end is utterly horrifying and will probably play a starring role in all my nightmares to come from this day forward
Honestly, I'm really glad that I found this video. Too often, I'll watch reviews of a kid's movie that wasn't made to do much more than entertain some kids and make a profit, and people will act as if it's the worst movie to ever exist, or it needs to be perfect. It's refreshing to see someone who honestly just says, "it's inoffensive, kind of entertaining and it's just mediocre" and not make a big fuss about it
I watched this for my final year essay on adaptations of Romeo and Juliet and various degrees of source faithfulness and it didn’t quite give me a month of depression but I heckled my TV screen the whole way through.