Lyrics: :) Chooooooooooooooo- When I was a B O Y, I had a favorite treaert. It was when my mum made chohc. [Chocolate Cake Enjoyment Revving] I L O V E D C H O C O L A T E C A K E My mum, she says to me, "{ listen, michael, } if there's any chocolate cake left over at the end of the day, you can take some to school tomorrow to have at playtime, or at playtime, or at playtime, or at playtime, or at playtime, or at playtime, or at lunchtime, emitime." So I used to go to school with a piece of chocolate cake in my little box, and I'd be walking to school, [drug-related foreshadowing] (itsinthereiloveityeeaaaahhhh) and I'd get to school, and it would be playtime or lunchtime and I'd, o, d'I dnd I'd, open up the box, t- [admiration] ... open up the paper, [sniffing of chocolate cake] (Look at it!) [it was drugged] Gonna get- [the drugs are kicking in] Ah ha an nyah ah ha- [Rosen Confusion] [ROSEN ALERTED] Y- [drug-induced love episode] Ah- [paranoia] [drug-fueled love episode 2] [michael hesitates before biting] [it's too nice] A- A- I lullulloved my mum's chohc. [digging through chohc] [judgement] And one time, there wawas some chocolate cake left over at the end of the day. Yaay. And I went to bed. And I was faafs. And then, in the middle of the night, I woke up and I thought, [snapansnapansnapansnap] Chocohchocohchocohchocolate cake. [drugged joy] Mayammayammaybe, I could go downstairs, a n d h a v e a l i t t l e l o o k a t i t n. No one would know. So I got up, out of the bedS H H H h h I must'nt wake my brother up! Alolalolalong the passage s h H h, careful not to tread on the creaky floolfloard, outside Mipsnadnimaedroom, because, IF THEY WAKE UP AND FIND ME I'LL BE IN BIG TROUBLE SO REALLY QUIET. RRR are they still asleep? yeey ?p? yes! okay, along the passage, down the stairs, into the kitchen, open the cupboard and YE-EY dna dr [drugs again] And I take it out. Just have a little look at it. [fumes] And then I notice, some little crurcs on the plate. So I think if I- yiay- lick the end of my finger, I could pick up some of those crumbs. ANDNOONEWOULDKNOWANYTHINGABOUTIT. chkachkachkachkachkackahckahckahckkhakchakkchakchkhckchckchkhckhckhc [crumbdrug episode] MMMMMMMMMMMMMM And then, I notice, on the side of the cake, there's some little crurc- elttil emos s'ereumbly bits falling off. So if I take a knife, I could just… { tidy it up a little bit } N O O N E W O U L D N O T I C E [knife spreads and unspreads] [cake squelches and unsquelches] [michael breaks the loop and grabs cake] [this is quickly reverted back to drugs] [the rippling effects of the rosen when exposed to cake are profoundly disturbing to the average watcher] And then I notice, that as I've tidied it up a little bit over here, then maybe I could just… EVEN IT UP A BIT OVER HERE- so I take the knife again, and this time, emit sis time, thruwu uwu uwuthe crispy icing on the top, thrOOOOUGH the squashy icing in the middle, [hweeewh hwooh], and I've got a wh a hwh a hwh a whole slice this time, yeah! And it's all gonna go in there [Consumption] [Enjoyment] [Reversal Episodes] I can't stop myself, so I go- [Chohc Murder] [Dear Lord] [It's Still Going?] [Oh Thank God He's Slowing Down] [Cake That Makes You Stutter] ... slice- [Confusion] Oh no. I- Woaaow. It's all gone. Oh no. They're bound to notice now. A whole chocolate cake doesn't just disappear. What am I gonnannogIma- What am I gonna do? Whew? [He Knows] I know, I'll wash up the plate and the knife, and they won't know anything about it. Good thinking. Take the plate. And the knife. [Drugs interrupt Michael's dishwashing] - drawer, zztpop. [Michael struggles to close the drawer] And back up to bed. s s s s S S S S H H- up the stairs. dkdkdkdk. along the passage. now i know where the creaky floorboard is now, so all i've got to do is tread OVER it cause if i tread ON it and it makes a noise, i am dead. careful now [death]