We help people heal from the pain of affairs and betrayal. Our programs are research based, combining a solid curriculum with the strength of collaborative support to provide solace and recovery for both couples and individuals. All of our materials are created by clinical professionals, many of whom have personally experienced infidelity.
I think I would have him involuntarily committed to a mental hospital or psych ward. And insist on hypnosis, the electric shock treatments like they did back in the 50’s , 60,s . I heard that would make them remember😂
My wife did this exactly. Any time I ever had a concern or a need I was shut down. I was checked and gaslit into compliance and made out to be the crazy one. So I started lashing out because of how abandoned and starved I was for understanding and connection. And all my wife wanted was a dream life at my expense. I wanted to give her a dream but she never cared to work things out. It was just her way or the highway and she was so attached to a very specific life (joined at the hip with her parents and have everything revolve around them) that she hated me for not giving it to her. The whole marriage felt so terrible. She ended up leaving me for 2 months and I filed for divorce, but I withdrew it because I honest to God in my heart don't want this broken family. I want to figure out a way to make it work, and she takes all of my leadership as a blank check to manipulate me.
Did I mishear this video? Her scenario was that the woman cheated and the husband didn’t want to talk about it. But the advice the man gave was spoken as if the man cheated and the woman needs to take steps to get her power back? Am I missing something? Maybe I need to watch this a few more times.
I am 2 yrs from dd 2 & 2 1/2 yrs from dd the Slap This man has trickle truth , minimized, lied ,still withholds information. He says they werent loving cuddling laying in each arms. They had sex and rolled away. 😂😂 He thinks i am stupid. No women is going to do that and hang around for He guestimates Around 19mnts. And they only did a few positions. Well i read part of his journal, yup, i snooped, he did everything with her and he did with me. They all lie and cover themsleves Saying its to protect me... lol. Its to make themselves look good.and protect their own ass. My mind already goes there... why not just tell the truth. Intrusive thoughts. Every day...... Why, because our minds are powerful places and we are not stupid....... Its the hurt is tremendous. Knowing someone who supposedly loves you could hurt you with out a second thought , sleep in our beds after being with them. Sick minds......😢 .
My husband came clean because he understood it was better than I found out by myself. And because he's not the kind of guy that can lie for a long time.
That's actually pretty crazy. IDK exactly what she means from birth but I know my daughters haven't even kissed a boy at 18&20 and having met anyone they've wanted to do anything more yet but 😭 bwas molested as a child and was very sexual bway too young bc of the advantage older ppl took if me. Otherwise I wouldn't have been so cluelessly promiscuous at such a young age. From birth? No we grow into it and hopefully through love if we're raised properly.
So absolutely true - been there myself. I focus on ketsugi - the Japanese art of mending broken things &making them even more beautiful by using gold paint on the cracks - i apply this to my marriage & our relationship. I would like to see the full version of this podcast.
This is 90% of my story. Except in my case the cheating continued during the whole marriage until I found out about it. He NEVER STOPPED of his own volition
This was the most lacking video I’ve watched on this channel. I can say, from my perspective, there may be a lot more under the hood than what is being touched on.
These are good words and true but it’s easier said than done when you’ve been cheated on so badly. And you are the cheater in your relationship so seems not right hearing it from you.
7:51 It’s not selfishness.. most cheaters are narcissistic or have narcissistic tendencies to begin with. There is shame only because you got CAUGHT. Where was this shame when you were screwing your affair partner? Imagine being “selfish” after all that you have done. Cheaters deserve zero remorse cos y’all have zero morals and integrity.
These struggles are real. Even "struggles" sounds like minimizing. Please stop it with the kids. There are plenty of couples that have never had kids. So they do not hang in or go it because of them. Yes, it's not fair. It sucks. Injustice on steriods.
These videos are leaving out a lot of backstory and a ton of context. Before I'm willing to agree with Rick that the guy is the problem here, I need to know a lot more. How long after d-day? What was their story / what kind of affair(s)? How long did she trickle-truth and meet him with defensiveness? And how about now, is she meeting him with contrition, displaying empathy and remorse? What is her level of effort? What healing and relationship repair has she tried? Without this backstory, this video comes across as very tone deaf, and suggests that the unfaithful wife shouldn't be expected to bear any relationship discomfort or consequences.
What I took from it was that "I am responsible for me" Abuse is not ok and I can set boundaries to enjoy the kids. My pass does not dictate my future, if I my hurt spouse is not safe for me or the kids something needs to happen.
@@riospablo what do you mean not safe exactly? He should talk I agree but nobody’s kicking me out of my own house especially a cheating spouse who spoiled the sanctity of the house and home
Let me get this straight, she cheated she betrayed her husband, her life partner but she is gonna make rules. She needs to beg for forgiveness. She doesn’t get to make rules. She broke the rules of marriage
You are right, and also remember that abuse is never okay, no matter what happens. I am responsible for me. Additionally, the video says that after 18 or 24 months abuse is still going on and the hurt spouse is not taking steps to be safe for the relationship. It seems like a very specific situation.
So, are you saying it will never stop? That fear and threat level? I understand there’s ways the unfaithful spouse can help, but will the betrayed spouse always have that fear?
I usually disagree with a lot of stuff here. But kicking the "betrayed out" that is trash. You are treating the betrayed as the soul source. Even when the unfaithful is the wife. This channel is more pro female versus male. Rick and his staff are just part of the problem of feeding those unfaithful specially women in today's society. It is precisely of that ultimatum and other toxic attitudes from the unfaithful to the betrayed that I firmly stand with divorce. The world's of cheating are really deep to have to deal with the source of the pain who most of not all of the time is what in this channel doesn't want to admit a text book narcissist at best to a psychopath at worst.
We need more content from a males prospective. Men dealing with betrayal is highly unspoken about enough and we need more videos to help us deal with as we harbor the troubles and traumas we suffer.
It hurts they will never say anything negative about the affair partner 😢 it sucks when they defend them yet they think of their spouse as a piece of poop
My wife of 27yrs lives out if town during the week. She just told me on my birthday that she has had 4 one night stands and 4 dates with 8 different guys. What a birthday present. I ruminate constantly and don't know what to do. We have had some of the most intimate moments since the affairs , which were just 2 months ago. 4 guys he slept with in 6 days. I want to figure out what I need to do. Does anyone have any idea about this? I am seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist. I'm still a wreck. If you don't have any way of helping. At least pray for guidance and wisdom.
My ex-wife was busted, had lots of evidence and she denied, lied, gaslighted. We had several blowouts over the months I tried to work it out, but each time she denied, lied and gaslighted. She refused to go to counseling and told me i better not go myself. She was angry she got caught and had no remorse/guilt whatsoever. When i finally told her i wanted a divorce it was the only time she cried...you promised you would never leave me when we got married...ya but then you cheated and lied about it over and over....the truth sounds better than your lies.....but he's just a friend and its a big misunderstand.....your AP admits it....but that's just how he jokes around.....the lies and denial drove me insane.
My sister is struggling with this exact issue, however, the relationship with the AP can’t be buried because there is now a baby that has come out of this. Any advice that I can share with her?
I’m at a low point. I have forgiven my spouse, I’ve taken the responsibility for the things I have done wrong,ive corrected behavior i know he hates. I felt that after 48 years i had to try. He finds fault & blame no matter what I do. It’s very depressing. He gets so angry, I would do anything to get away from the anger , the dehumanizing blame , the knowledge that after doing every thing I can do, it isn’t enough. It will never be enough. There is no escape.
I had suspicions. I went through his phone and saw enough to be socked and was traumatized. He left and he has not said anything to me. No sorry no trying to explain. It's been 3 weeks and I have not tried to contact him neither. It's killing me because I want to get over him and not feel this way.
This has been the most informative and helpful video I've watched yet. I've watched many of this recovery series and multiple others but understanding the biology behind my many mood swings and sometimes feelings of lunacy is so incredibly helpful. Now i will watch this with the source of my pain and hope it helps us both. Thank you for this awesome series!! 🙏
