Untempered is a podcast curated around deep conversations relating to self development, mental health, relationships and so much more. Here, I'm creating a safe space to have helpful sharing of knowledge, and be able to be vulnerable in order to spark a positive change in all of us.
I have a question... If one is raised by a narcissistic parent/parents, then what determines one child becoming a codependent & the other child becoming a narcissist?
I don’t know if those who stay are unhealthy. A lot of times you’re in your 20s whereas you do not have enough experiences to know what is right or wrong. This is why older narcissist (like Pdiddy) go after 19 year olds. This is why redpillers say that women are mailable young. All young people are impressionable and do not know through experience what is healthy. Most people find it hard to leave relationships and that’s probably because they really fear aloneness.
We need to stop calling people with aspd psychopaths. An outdated term psychopath was much wider than aspd and wider than all personality disorders. I have eupd and according to that old terminology i’m also a psychopath. But eupd is treatable. Hi there from “a psychopath “ in remission. So i have no idea what or who this man is talking about
no. every situation is different. most of us see the sweet side of these people and hope for them to change and stay sweet. because that's what WE would do. we don't need or want to be mistreated. signed someone who left narcissistic abuse and already healed
When you meet someone who starts telling you about what lousy parents he had, and how he was victimized, isn’t it easy for an empathetic person to try to help them?
The Devine is spectacular, amazing, beautiful. Catholicism is one of the worst things that happened to me in my life, and I wish my lovely family wouldn't even bother with organized religion. Great day, evening or night!
acceptance, forgiveness, boundaries and indifference has been a game changer for family and relationships for people who are emotionally unavailable and have codependent/abusive traits.
They start to feel like people that are just dead inside like they're zombies like we can at Bernie's they look like a guy walking around but it's really a dead guy walking around it's just the strangest thing
If you start seeing red flags of something that just doesn't feel right about someone you need to start holding back a little bit and putting them in the acquaintance zone and don't let them so close to you that's how you protect yourself from a narcissist
They can seem really fun and loving at first but eventually The mask will slip and you'll see that they are the most empty miserable people you have ever met.
To me you can tell a narcissist because there's not really a person inside of there to connect with it feels like you're just grasping at straws to have a basic get to know you conversation a lot of the time. It feels like there's no one home inside of them. They talk about their special interests or about things that will boost their ego and they can't hold a basic conversation about how are you how's work what have you been up to what's been going on etc etc.. you'll see them constantly belittling other people based on mutable characteristics and snap judgments...
The average man wouldnt even be looked at by this woman. The average man would get zero connection with this woman. If she wants to only go for toxic men at the top of the male socio sexual hierachy that obviously other women want then that is on her.
Grannon has no clinical training in these matters. It is obvious he has a very crude approach and one that demonizes people. It is has nothing in common with how understanding of actual complx issues are treated. But the public wont know that and he utilises that to project an image of knowledge....but there are massive flaws in his content. Victimising people is a crude form of scapegoating in itself.....but thats lost here as people are distracted by his inaccurate use of special terms ...which are nothing like this in real psychological practice. Its a crude parody. Grannon is a bouncer who wanted to be in psychology.....i let my plumber fix my sink but i get my consultant to do my colonoscopy.
Grannon is one..... funny eh....obsession with narcissism is for people with deeply unresolved issues..... creating a hysteria. Authentic people are not bothered by such people. So watching narcissistic types discuss narcissism as if it's everywhere is a demonstration of the dual issues. It warps the perception of such issues far more than is necessary. Amateurs. Grannon is a bouncer who doesn't like standing in the rain chucking out drunks....so a platform and creating hysteria serves him well, but only adds to the overwhelm of unhealthy societal paranoia and mental health distortions.
Deep inside my soul, I have always felt but never wanted to admit that, I was actually getting supply from the Narc as well, no matter how horrible she would treat me. After this interview, now I can accept my own reality. I knew the game was rigged, but ignored the inevitable outcome!
Wait wait wait… Grannon speaks Spanish?! Whatttt 😅 Second, u can have a superego without an ego? Is that perhaps just an introject? An adopted voice that’s not your own? Third, I actually very much disagree with the repeated solution of “go to therapy.” Having went through 4 degrees in psychology, a doc program, and saw a few therapists while I was in school, I can say that MAYBE 1 out of 1,000 therapists really have any clue what Narcissism is, let alone how to treat it or its etiology. Reason being is because the DSM-5 hardly does it justice and doesn’t even touch on etiology. There is hope. I got through it by watching what feels like thousands of hours of videos on narcissism AND by never falling into the trap of being a “victim.” You’re not a victim, take ownership of where you went wrong, never stop working on the best version of yourself, show yourself grace, strive to be better.
i'm shocked that he knows so much about narcissism yet looks up to a narcissistic psychopath like jorden peterson. grannon is like "watch out for narcissists, they like to scapegoat people. anyway, jordan peterson is a really deep, intellectual for scapegoating minority groups".
The lady talking, talking to this man, seems like she has some similarities to her own parents. It’s important not to repeat one’s own parents’ patterns. It’s sad when our parents don’t change. We can’t change who our parents are, but, we can choose not to be like them ourselves. Once we get healed and whole, we no longer need to be afraid to be in their lives, and bound to cut them off from your/our lives, not continue acting, and talking like we’re still victims, their victims. We don’t have to cut off our parents, if we’ve become healed, and whole ourselves; that’s when we look at them with love pity, and respect, but, at arm’s length ❤️
@@jeanie5074 Life is short. And if a person-be it a parent or not-ruins it, undermines your self esteem, takes away your strength, time, money, emotions-leave his person. Give yourself your space and this person a chance to have healthy life, don't waste your time. That's how I think.
They love to bait. They love to confuse you with word salad then say you’re dumb for not understanding. Every attempt at getting them to talk about their bad behavior follows the same predictable pattern.
OMG this exactly 23:50 all together good and I turn out to be the bad person. I am holding onto them being the bad person this time. I have attracted 4 more after having my father narcissist.
What if we idealize the real? You are correct Richard Grannon. We idealize each other and we idealize the image we imagined that person to be. People are so funny. True npd's are quite damaging to those they "love". All of us humans value and desire love so much yet deny that we are ever seeking it. Love is really the only purpose of life in my humble opinion. Is enlightenment not a form of love? What is a higher purpose? People have fallen victim to the idea that love equates happiness. It does not. Some of the greatest examples of love are sacrificial. Is that the true issue with this epidemic of narcissism, political and moral divide, and blurred boundaries? Do we value our own individual autonomy more than sacrificial love? Is this what our societies are truly struggling with? Maybe. Love, with all of its ensuing sacrifice, is no longer valued as an ideal. Truth went first but everyone was distracted by MTV and reality television and didn't notice. I have often felt that those of us living now were born on a precipice in history. The edge is rapidly approaching.
Somatic work might help, the body need to release emotions as well. Walking in nature is good for the nervous system. Now it is worse than ever before because the pain is coming to the surface. Listen to Gabor Matè. Read Eckhart Tolle...Ciao
Are we "blind" for real or is it that we don't want to see what is real? Because every time when something was unhealthy... down, very deep inside was a feeling, but every time as well was the thought that ït can t be so".... I'm in recovery for some years, but i'm feeling lost and also this question is always on my mind. Until what point was our responsibility? I was raised by a narcissistic grandmother ( and an absent narcissistic father) and also have two long relationships with this type of people (romantic). I don t know why is so important to know the answer at this question, or maybe i know.... it s hard for me to make peace with me, who wanted or stayed in those relationships, or think what i could not make it without or that part of me who was so afraid ... so hard to accept . Thank you
I think they brainwashed our brain that we will not acchieve anything without them. And we believed that because of low selfesteem. Now , when you do try and see that you indeed can accomplish things alone : 1. your selfesteem grows . 2. you become less interesting for the narcs. Forgiveness need some time. I know the feeling of being like paralized of the thought of leaving . You can try some mirror work , it does not Matter If you believe it or not: " i Love myself, i respekt myself , therefore i forgive myself" .
