Hey Sunflowers! My name is Brenda and welcome to BPDsquared, the channel dedicated to educating, healing, and spreading awareness beyond the mental health community.
Thank u for making this I hope im not commenting too late to this, so I'm unsure if I have BPD or not but I do have a tendency to obsess and attach over ppl I get attached to to the point where it's quite similar to what an fp in BPD would be with the way i would emotionally depend on them , and recently a few days ago my bf broke up with me saying his reasoning was that he isn't in the right mindset anymore and that when he feels "cracks" he runs away from ppl he loves most..and he blocked me EVERYWHERE with no chance of contacting him.. And ive been really struggling to let go, I was rlly obsessed with him and he was also rlly sweet to me during this whole time, I've been rlly paranoid, panicked scared, upset and also more suicidal bc of this situation... I know I need to give it time.. I know my bf reassured me that when he returns we will start over as friends and that he doesn't hate me.. Shortly before blocking me But I'm still scared and paranoid having thoughts like "what if he changed his mind and hates me now?? " I rlly hope I can get over soon... But it's probably gonna be rlly hard..and im also impatient..i have no idea when he will return.. Or if he ever will return... Or if he will ever unblock me.. I'm scared he will forget me.. During our relationship I felt rlly comfortable with him telling him stuff that I never told anyone else.. I was rlly happy with him.. I wish he didn't let go so suddenly... When I asked him if he will return to me he only said "I might do" which only confuses me more bc it isn't a definite yes or no...
I don't remind myself of what it feels like to feel bad when I feel happy, but I was raised by my bipolar uncle who would beat me & psychologically abuse me when he was manic, so I feel guilty feeling happy, like I don't deserve it.
You have never lied! I’m 26 about to turn 27 next month… I don’t feel like I’m in my mid 20’s mentally. I have gained skills to take care of myself but I still feel like a 19/20 year old because of the self image issues with BPD
Yes, so much. Where I feel in my head has changed over time but it's never where my chronological age is. Rn I'm 40 and feel mid-20s most of the time though it varies.
I know how you feel. Sometimes people come in and out of our lives for a reason. As an autistic boardeeline myself, I can empathise with how brutal it is to loose someone you love strongly amd I've felt hate, anxiety, grief and this person was abussing me and I had to accept that they never cared about me and I was better off without them. I also learned I found it hard to leave this person who was abusing me because of abandonment fear.
I am not able to advise you from a medical standpoint, nor can I say what is best since I do not know her, but I will suggest that if this is something that happens every month, she may need to adjust her medication, get a second opinion about her diagnosis or change some factors in her life that could be causing her stress. Again this is just a suggestion to look into, not medical, professional advice. 🌻❤️🩹
I encourage you to try. Sometimes the things that help us the most are the most difficult to get into. Give it a try and let me know how it went. 🌻❤️🩹
I broke up with my girlfriend in October after a series of manic episodes. I still hurt every day. She hasn’t left my dreams. I appreciate you sharing your story. It makes me feel less alone on this tough journey.
We are autistic and OSSD your experience ead validating. Our host whe they were little used to dream of a lot of worlds some places theyd never been in. Theyd always get night terrors. With age that did die down but vivid dreams wont. Also validating on another point as to how blue showed up, because one of ohr alters st. Jimmy and billie joe Armstrong would show up the same way. We remember out host not really caring about greenday growing up, but billie was just still there in our system and we knew it. Wewoulr see him whenever our host would play as a child he would sit beside us just wacth and listen billie would. Billie now probably has the closest relationship with our host out of most of the alters. St. Jimmy being 2nd he originally showed up differently from his source but he was still connected to source. He was just more of a tender soul to him. How wed describe his presence he wore a light color palette. Later once our host got closer to him he started to become more source connected. He would also do the same thing billie would do, just sit and listen and watch. Specially showed up when our host was angry or mad or even depressed and Sometimes providing our host with hugs or comfort if needed be. This role would be important later, because he had grown such a close relationship with our host that he said let me hold that rage. We have a very large headcount some are more ingolved than others. -mike dirnt
I was misdiagnosed for a long time with borderline personality disorder. When I finally started talking to my trauma informed therapists and really advocated to them for myself about my deepest feelings and thoughts about what I experience, I was told I have cptsd and osdd. This video was recommended and I want to see what happens on your journey! Sometimes it takes a very long time to figure out if a person has a dissociative disorder. ❤ Dont ever feel discouraged.
I just lost my husband/favorite person of six years. I've been going through tragic heartache, and as a person with BPD, I wanted to express that I understand the pain you're feeling - you are certainly not alone. Stay strong, sunflower.
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I'm glad it was helpful! Thank you so much for sharing. I hope you find what works best for you. Congrats for taking steps to manage your mental health. 🫂🌻💕
Needed this thank you 🙏🏻 im so lost and feel so alone reaching out left right cenree for support but ive had to wait but therapy starting next, i just cant let go riht now and its been 3months. Its destroyee me
I'm so glad it was helpful. Just remember healing has no time limit, nor does it look the same for every person. It's okay if you're not ready to let go just yet, but know that you are taking steps with therapy and reaching out. Take your time. It WILL get better. Thank you for sharing. 🫂💕🌻
I dislike not always being able to stand up for myself. I'm m learning to be more vocal about the things that affect me and when my boundaries are being crossed.
