❤️‍🩹autism & menopause 

I am just so thrilled to finally see someone talk about this. I'm 53, menopause started around 49-50ish and I just found out I'm autistic in the last year. I had always felt "off" but menopause multiplied that by 100. It's so hard to find information out there regarding both and how they affect each other. Thank you for bringing this subject the light it needs.

I’m 41 and this is the first video that has ever made me feel normal!

My menopause has lasted for over 10 years. Ive had lots of meltdowns. Id had a diagnosis of CPTSD form childhood experiences which all came to light in perimenopause. I had really hidden a lot from myself and, whoosh, it all came out. Self abuse, catatonic behavior, screaming fits, I really put my family through a lot. I haven't slept through the night in over 10 years. I had 4 years mostly in bed from fibromyalgia. I had to leave my teaching career and have not held a job for over six months at a time since! And Ive been working since I was 14. Have had to work through a shit tonne of trauma to become healthier and happier. And the icing on the cake is finding out i'm also an autistic person. its a lot and its a relief to have some answers. Im glad Im not alone!

My autism diagnosis came during perimenopause, along with depression and losing my job. It was like the 'volume switch' of my autistic traits was ramped right up and my personality changed in that I just couldnt cope. This video totally resonates with me!!

When I was going through menopause, memory issues were a big deal. So don't get frightened if you experience that also. That being said, I'm on the other side of menopause now and am here to tell you that you can make it too, and the relief of it finally being over is wonderful! So hang in there, Dr. Kim! Thank you for bringing up the issue of having difficulty being understood and taken care of properly. Don't be afraid to seek out the right medical professionals who can help! The best is yet to come 😊

OMG thank you for articulating some of the issues I have been experiencing. I feel as though I am losing my mind and it has significantly affected my ability to work. I have yet to find the right caregiver for HRT. It helps tremendously to know that I am not alone.

I'm 57, an Aspie with CPTSD from a childhood and adulthood similar to yours, Dr. Sage, and on the tail end, I hope, of menopause. Long story short, menopause pretty much threw my body into rather severe autoimmune issues, also, that made existing moderate arthritis, severe veinous issues, thrombophilia and erratic BP so bad, I became permanently disabled in 2020. I'm lucky to get 3-4 hours of sleep a night. But, on the tail end of menopause things are slowly getting better, but will never be good enough to be able to sit or stand to work full time. I'm exhausted with chronic pain and insomnia all the time. Because of the blood clotting disorder, I have never been a candidate for HRT. I've always been a quiet, relatively happy, introvert from autism, but when menopause came to town, I found menopause heightened all of my environmental sensitivities as well as very much lowered my ability to handle being around most people, especially loud extroverted or cluster B types to the point I basically am alone all the time except for my boyfriend. I just find it easier to keep to myself and enjoy "The Public" in small conversations with cashiers, and random strangers for literally a few minutes. I don't really have any friends anymore and my family lives far away and I hate to say it, but I'm not lonely in the least. Autism, CPTSD and the menopause years truly is the recipe of the perfect storm. But, as I said, as my body is leaving menopause things are normalizing a lot. I'm slowly regaining a lot of my health and the autism social stuff is getting much better. I'm not the anxious vexed person around people as much anymore. So, take heart ladies, I think it does ease up in the end. Good health and bright blessings to everyone! Thank you, Dr. Sage, for all of this investigation between autism and CPTSD. I think you are about the only professional out there really digging into it and I find your videos very helpful. Take care.

I went through very bad menopause, where my adrenals tried to compensate for the lack of estrogen by working overtime, which overproduced cortisol. After three years of extreme suffering I ended up at the hospital, where they put me in the psych ward because I was "eccentric" and a "hypochondriac". I was drugged with heavy drugs I can't metabolise, and medically abused, ridiculed, and bullied for three years until rescued by a sympathetic and knowledgeable psychiatrist. They had the bloodwork that showed I was going through menopause, and that my cortisol was high, but they thought "curing" my autism was more important than helping me deal with menopause symptoms they didn't even believe in. 13 years later I'm still in therapy for the PTSD from that.

I tried HRT out of desperation but I got potentially deadly blood clots from it. In fact HRT must have turned on something in me that made me develop clots again a few months later. I'm lucky to be alive. I can never take HRT again. However, there is a trend now for people to say "take HRT" and say HRT solves everything, "you should just go on HRT!" I find that sooooo annoying because of my situation, and I'm already annoyed with everything as a neurodivergent menopausal woman!

OMG I am 47 and am in medical menopause. I started having night sweats around 7 years ago. Now I just get hot flashes. But I have many other symptoms, all which intersect with undiagnosed autism, and some very stressful life things all at once: 2020 happened, my teenager had an eating disorder and some other issues, we had some major changes at work, and my dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer's. That journey of helping my parents was quite rough, and then dad passed away a year ago. I am an only child, and my mom doesn't drive, so I became her driver. But I'm much more than that to her, as I discovered along the way that she is probably also autistic, and has some additional needs that dad once managed. I'm just over here treading water. Every emotion has been heightened due to menopause, so I very much appreciate this content.

Anna's wild yam cream works for me, even though I have up's and downs.... I am OK. ❤ Thanks Kim and wishing you all a lovely weekend. Australian

Started perimenopause at 38, doctors finally told me I was going through perimenopause at 43, had a brake down at 46. Finally found someone who could tell me what was going on. I was told I am autistic the year I turned 47 and diagnosed with autism at 48. This year my perimenopause systems are getting worse. My autism is all over the place and I don’t know from day to day what I will feel like.

I’m 38 and the topic has been on my mind, lately. Thanks for speaking to it.

Thank you for this video dr. Kim. It's so concerning that you could not get the information you needed. You're already going through the stress of having to have surgery, and then there is no guarantee that the procedure is safe for you. That's just too much uncertainty and stress. I hope you are well

I'm 57 and in menopause hell. I'm actually going to the doctor next week to explore HRT. I find my high sensitivity and being overly emotional is magnified times 100. I'm very depressed and don't care about things that I usually care about. I'm so sorry for all you're going through

Oh lordy. OHH LORDY... So very, very relevant on this very day, in fact, because I am STILL dealing with the same PMS horrors every month. Being poor in USA (TN) I have no access to health care so even though I know there are meds that could help, I feel hopeless. I take melatonin to help with sleep. At least that works. Just 1.5, half a chewable. I can't stop feeling depressed about never having another child even though rationally I don't even WANT another child. I have two and they are lovely, both autistic like me, so the last thing I need is to have another baby lol and I am so emotional. I had a duck in my pond yesterday and I was just bawling watching this silly duck bob his head in the water. And I swear my sensory issues have been 10x worse since all this started last year. I can't stand clothes. I wear the most ridiculously loose 5x males V neck tees all the time. I can wear a large, maybe an xl, but I can't STAND the binding of a shirt. So you can imagine what it's like putting on a bra. Which I do not do, ever. I never had these sensory issues. The auditory sensitivity is so bad sometimes the sound of my daughter talking gets to me and she is my best friend and I love talking to her. But she has a tone that hits me in the back of the head sometimes, if you know what I mean. And I'm just SO tired. OMG I was a construction worker for YEARS. I was so strong. I was the only woman in the company so I had to work twice as hard to prove myself (or I thought I had to!) and I had big muscles. And then I had my second child and I got fat and lazy and now I ache and I'm so tired all the time. I try to eat healthy nutritious foods, thankfully I've never had trouble with food, in fact I have trouble eating too much so that's a constant battle because if there's one thing that always makes me happy and makes life a little more cheery it's EATING. And I'm an outstanding Southern style cook with a great love of butter and bacon grease and white sugar. And lard. Sigh. So... it's been a bit of a struggle lately.

the phone thing is so true. I live rural and hardly anyone offers online scheduling round here and I'm often too anxious to call so I just don't go to the doctor. I haven't been to my OBGYN in 7 years or so, I'm pretty sure I'm at the beginning of perimenopause and actually would like to talk about it with someone but it's that darn phone calls that I have to make. I keep pushing them away. It's not 1985 anymore so why can't I book it online?!

I started menopause at about 42, maybe earlier. I am now 49. It has been horrible. I have had extreme anxiety issues that lasted for years. I developed driving anxiety after a bout of SSRIs that created more issues than anything. Hot flashes every 10 minutes, crashing fatigue, brain fog, extreme sensory issues, arthritis, and I developed some really bad allergies. All of the led to me figuring out that I am AuHD. During this time my youngest was struggling with ADHD, school, and suicidal ideation. All of his things led to a diagnosis for him, which confirmed what I suspected about myself. There is NOT enough information about menopause and autism, or just menopause by itself. My Mom was no help. She just keeps telling me that all she had were some night sweats. I am not sure that ANYONE really believes anything that I bring up about the issues that I am having either. It has been like the lifetime of issues that I was having all built up and exploded.

I have Googled this many times and found nothing. Thanks for all the information that I was searching for. Recently was diagnosed with Stage 2 Breast Cancer and I will be starting hormone blockers soon. I wonder how that will be for my energy levels and ASD. I feel exhausted going through the surgeries and I haven't even started radiation yet. I'm tired, tired of life. Health care professionals still don't know enough about Autism and how it effects treatments to even advise their patients.

Thank you for making this video. This is my life, currently. 😮‍💨

We start dropping oestrogen at about 35years of age. I am perimenopausal - which is when the hormones fluctuate the most leading to the 'worst' of the symptoms - I add this to say that those of us not in menopause yet should also link the emotional state to this stage of life. Perimenopause nearly destroyed me - there are some stats out there - females are more likely to commit s** at age 50 (peri/menopause), more likely to become alcoholic at the same age, etc, etc. Gave up work - quite literally before I throttled someone. Thankfully husband is supportive. Had some very dark moments. It was actually perimenopause that shone a light on my cptsd - there had to be something going on. I had managed throughout my chaotic life prior to perimenopause to keep it together, or just lurch from one crisis to the next without much reflection or questioning - that ability all fell apart when my oestrogen plummeted. Now on HRT which has also been a bit of a struggle - and by no means is a magic cure! I take HRT primarily to guard against osteoporosis, dementia and heart disease - all diseases of menopause/loss of oestrogen. Thank fully it has evened out my hormones too. In the UK we have to fight to even get HRT - over here we still think it is a case of managing hot flushes, etc, disregarding the emotional toll and of that on our future - hormone deficient - bodies. Thanks for doing this video.x

HRT free and that’s how it’s staying.

I also went through painkiller addiction due to a car accident in 2007 and I got to tell you if you have women who have gone through detox from painkillers or opiates and their randomly feeling like they're going through withdrawal again with the hot flashes the cold sweats and restless leg and all sorts of other things then they might want to make an appointment with their OBGYN because I realized when I thought I was randomly going through withdrawal from medication I hadn't taken since 2015 that it was actually menopause. Yep it's like that. Went to the hospital three different times not knowing what was going on shaking like crazy freezing no fever yeah and they're studies now that show that estrogen produces histamines and then histamines help produce estrogen. That's fun too

I’m still trying to get an autism diagnosis after just figuring this all out in the past few years (I’m 63). I went through menopause in my mid to late 50s and I’m trying to figure out now if they may be what may have caused my life to completely fall apart. In late 2021, I had to leave my job of 20 years because I could no longer cope. I have completely lost interest in things that I’ve loved my entire life (like music). I don’t necessarily feel depressed anymore, but I feel unable to do anything. I try to analyze everything to death and wonder how I got here and what caused this. It just recently started wondering if menopause had something to do with it. Was it a case of major autistic burnout and menopause? You’re the first person I’ve seen address this subject at all.

I’m certain I’m starting perimenopause, but of course my doctor thinks 39 is too young (despite a family history of early perimenopause/menopause), so I’m very grateful for you pointing me to this information! It’s so frustrating how sparse and frankly unhelpful much of the information and research on menopause is (which really is about perimenopause much of the time, technically). Seems like 90% of “here’s how to manage your menopause” stuff on the internet is just telling you to go to therapy and take walks (neither of which I’m opposed to, and I think everyone will benefit by doing both, but it’s pretty reminiscent of the “it’s all in your head, dear” treatment of “hysterical” women)😤 unsurprisingly, we’ve known about the effect of hormones (or the lack/diminishment of them) on the neurodivergent body/mind through lived experience and anec-data, but for us late identified autists, much of that knowledge is only understood through the ND context after we’ve suffered through medical gaslighting and disregulation from birth control, pregnancy and/or PMDD. It makes me want to cry from frustration and fury

Everything. Me.

Are you talking about perimenopause aswell?? Or just menopause??

How about adhd and menopause. It is definitely worse than ever. I’m going to see my gynecologist July 1 to talk about HRT. I’ve been researching HRT & it seems like I’m definitely a candidate. I’ve got to helped. My disorganization is out of control & lack any motivation whatsoever. It’s horrible. I’ve read my adhd is possibly on spectrum of autism. OVERWHELMED.

A thing I learned the hard way is food sensitivities/allergies can develop after things like tick bites, surgeries or other stressors (or maybe just with age) which you never had before. These food issues can make menopausal symptoms WAY worse so maybe start there before messing with your hormones. Also, learn to work with your cycles at any age (see Fast Like a Girl by Dr. Mindy Pelz). Hope this helps someone.

This is my menopause experience so far. I can't afford an autism diagnosis, but it seems that as menopause advances, I get sicker and sicker. I am under two specialists for a rare illness, undergoing tests biopsies, and if I get taken off HRT, it' s going to be the worst (menopause has triggered my MDD and HRT is holding it back). I cannot describe how awful it is. Every second week is a new mini hell (aka medical appointment).

Found out I was autistic AND started menopause at 51! It was hellacious and took until I was 55. I lost EVERYTHING and am unemployed and living on HUD Food Stamps and state provided health care hoping I'm not homeless before I can retire. But I made it though! Traded all the menstrual stuff for arthritis though which is, I guess, better than being pre-menopausal--so, there's that.

As a 40 year old with PCOS, I have been on birth control for half my life. I thought menopause meant the END of hormone issues and mood swings. This does not bode well for me - but thank you for the warning.

I'm 50 and was never diagnosed with autism, but what you just said about difficulty making phone calls has been me for years! In my 20s it would cause me such anxiety! I purposely chose work at that time where I only had to focus on one thing, like straightforward data entry with no phone at my desk. I did learn to acclimate myself through the years and even went to school for Veterinary Assistant, but since having a total hysterectomy and losing so many women who understood me, I feel like I am regressing again. It just makes the world a scarier place right now.

Oh my God I have early onset menopause I'm 45 and I'm completely in the middle of menopause and since this has happened I have become more and more of a art studio recluse.

Does anyone have bowel issues on a morning, like foul smelling hot gas, loose stools?

So thankful to understand why I had such a hard time with menopause along with the death of my father at the same time. Understanding Autism in women is mind blowing. You are opening my eyes to so much. Thank you.

I started going through menopause 8 years ago and have been on hrt since then. The new studies say that hrt can be beneficial for women, and has been beneficial to my health. As far as brain fog, adding functional mushrooms to the diet can help as well as giving more energy.

A HUGE YES! To all of the above!