101 Love Letters for Windows: From 1995, With Love 

You had me at 42!

Roses are Red Java is Hot 418 I'm a tea pot!

Also send your partner a copy of this song to make sure they get the message: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-Pg4xdLYS2wo.html

Producer: You've only got 100 letters here. We need another to hit our 101 goal. Writer: Screw it. I'll write one about having AIDS.

I'll admit, that made me laugh way harder than it probably should've.

It's for when you've had a general protection fault...

You just made my day! I can't stop laughing! Thank you!

Marry me! T_T

lol

"To understand how much I love you you'd need to divide by 0."

General protection fault

UwU

Valentine's Day is one time I actually love social media. All the other single peeps, men and women alike, seem to come out and post snarky shit. The snarky shit is nice enough on its own, but it's even nicer to be reminded that you don't absolutely need to have a significant other to be a fully functioning and recognized adult.

incels?

I swear, with some of those, if I sent any, I’d have a restraining order filed against me so fast...

@@newtrussell1835 SIMPS

😓 that's definitely something

Just too narcissistic to ever open up

Now THAT’s what I call a Mad-Lib!

[He stabs him]

For the Bugchasing market

the 90's were dark times, you know...

I like how that's the first thing that pops up. Every time you go to write a love letter, you have to see that.

I love how they've separated AIDS from other diseases, like they really wanted to drive the point home that they've covered the "whoops, gave you aids!" angle.

Late 80s early 90s was like the peak of the AIDS epidemic. “Dear lover, sorry I gave you an incurable STD. Let’s stay together forever!”

this line got a chuckle from me

@@YoureUsingWordsIncorrectly That must have been one hell of a Hello World program lol.

"Dividing by zeros" sounds like a dope band name

Better than calling the pickle jerk cops.

Chris Chan's worst nightmare!

Especially when most of them read like mindless slave devotion. :D

See when you had to buy it on a disk it seems entirely tragic... But hide it behind a website, call it [adjective] [animal] and charge a few quid to deliver it and it's entirely acceptable, don't you know!!

While I could make the argument that certain people just wouldn't be able to express their feelings without the help of something like this, but I also believe that most people wouldn't be sad enough to buy this thing

NO EFFORT?! Do you know how long ut took LGR to finally be able to make it work slightly?

@@mapesdhs597 true, they are so cheesy that I paused the video to read them with the dumbest voices I could think of.

They've been together for 69 years, how sweet.

@@zephyrian1006 they've been together for 69 years, Nice

Yeah, didn't get the ever-approaching-towards-infinity love.

I love you so much, NAMEOFSIGNIFICANTOTHER

*ILOVEYOU.txt flashbacks*

@@SharlyTV More likely ILOVEYOU.exe Remember that virus?

@@-SundayWolf ILOVEYOU.TXT.vbs

@@polyphonydigital you mean LOVELE~1?

Hahahahahahaa

Werd

🤣

Not only AIDS, it was AIDS, diseases and more.

It does start with A

You are like CIH my darling, for I was infected with your love on April 24th

9:43, btw

Surely that will turn his floppy into a full hard disk.

Prequel quotes? Proving once again Clint is a man of culture and class

"butt"

"YOU DESTROYED A PART OF MY SOUL." Not you, Anders. I actually relaxed this afternoon with a jigsaw puzzle and the Planet X2 and X3 soundtracks.

Lmao

Can happen anywhere in code, in sort loops or algorithms. Math is used everywhere in code.

My guess would be something to do with memory management, dividing by an uninitialized variable.

@T J B The date shouldn't have anything to do with a word processor failing to process words. It's just a terrible product.

@@Cucumbercastle1 Sorting usually don't use dividing ops and loops (over collections) are commonly only done for non-zero length. The GPF and Divide by Zero kinda implicates some unintialized pointer mem-read which either results in an invalid address or an 0-value were a non-zero values was expected.

As others have pointed out it could be due to almost anything. I'm wondering if it could possibly be due to file corruption. The files on the install disc are compressed, but I'm not sure how much integrity checking there would have been. It does seem somewhat unlikely, but so does selling a boxed copy of a software that crashes on start. On install even. The setup application did throw an error Windows 3.1, and I'm assuming they used some 3'rd party software for the installer. So the problem might stem from the installer itself being corrupted. Perhaps a bit far fetched, but I view it as unlikely that the setup application would throw a general protection fault because of a damaged archive. Well, just a thought.

Lieutenant Major divide by zero 😂😂😂😂😂 6:11

7:02

I'm trying to remember now if it was a file you could edit to get the snarkey comments or if it was just a fake clippy program.

Exactly. Perfect top-down design by the devs, really hammering home what it truly means to be in Love

:-D

: o

Did you divide by zero?

:0

Hey, that's Lister's line!

It didnt escalate, it had a very early climax

Aids, disease, and love.. All this and Mike Wallace tonight on 60 minutes!

More importantly, fell through what? Is some of his furniture too holey?

This is seriously what I thought when I got the notification. It was plausible!

I could have written a better program in high school than this shit. holy crap.

Its on

Step 5: spell stationery correctly.

I don't think they made a lot of profit of this junk

@@matt.604 No, no. The CEO is stationary. As many of that era were. "Things are rolling perfectly smoothly! They're not paying me a million dollars a year to rock the boat!"

Aww, why wasn't this an option in the selection of pre-written love letters?

Dear whatsaname.

Dear Shane?

Max Payne

Dear Mame

This is insane.

Yes, always make sure to use protection before you go swinging around your 5.25 inch floppy..... Disk.

But what about general protection errors, though.

Well then, expect to be making baby USB drives.

Wouldn't it be more like Multiplying by 0?

Ouch XD

4:17

@@4Wilko yes that is indeed the timestamp

You sent him one of those letters with the phone number and full address, didn't you?

I'm almost a million percent certain that Diet Pepsi isn't a legitimate treatment for AIDS.

@@U014B yeah that still count as almost, probably still happen 🤷

@@rogueanuerz That's fair.

Keep your love juices inside the carton.

Everyday I watch you from my car as you walk out of the building. You look so beautiful. Then I follow you to your home. Such a nice home you have. I wonder what your cats name is? I came by during the day... did you know you forgot to lock your door? Boy I'm such a "secret admirer" of you....

🎶Every move you make, every breath you take, I'll be watching you...🎶

It’s awkward how some actions nowadays seem to be pretty blameworthy and just back in the nineties were “romantic stuff”...

ChozoSR388 And... when did that era end? 🤔

No QA testing or optimization at all. If it complied with no errors as you said "Ship it!"

@@glenncaughey5044 late 2010s. We are now in the era of "Ship it!" even if it doesn't compile. Eventually a compiling version will make its way through cont. integration and be shipped

@@TheFerrango example: windows 10

Linux "Don't compile it, just post on a forum this convoluted line of text and they can compile it themselves, Ship it to the repository." 2020's - "Ship it, By the time they download all the updates, we should have all the patches done that the EARLY ONES complained about."

Ooh, a secret admirer.

I'm wondering if they're still sending letters from jail with this program

I want to know if anyone has had a relationship begin with one of these silly letters

unocualqu1era HA 😂

@@isaakwelch3451 If so, and they had offspring, I'm scared.

@@unocualqu1era No, it was impossible - digital media wasn't allowed in jails and prisons till much much later

Keep your chin up man, someday you'll find that special someone.

You seem pretty nice to me.

@@harrkev On most days I'm a nice guy, but on this day of the year, I go out of my way to make as many people feel supported and appreciated as possible. No one should feel alone or unsupported on any day but especially not on this day.

@@TheMrthegovman you're an unsung hero, my friend.

Don't worry about it. You have the rest of the year to find somebody. Take a tip from our friend Galen, and use today as a time to help spread some kindness to others who may also be having a hard time. You are not alone

Almost as bad as the Ayds Weight Loss Commercials from the early 1980s.

Gotta fill in the 'A' index somehow I guess

I wanted to read those letters!

Spagooblio could of used ass lol

AIDS has been the lifeguard of our relationship.

My old pentium 4 must hate me for dumping her 10 years ago for a phenom II x6. She still lives with me downstairs. Its just that she was slow and couldnt do the work i needed her t do and on top of that she didnt have much ram and im a kind of guy that likes computers with big rams.

@@laharl2k LOL!

@@laharl2k LOL!

Her (2013), starring joaquin phoenix

Same

me too

I'm starting to suspect that the program IS infected with AIDS, since it crashes constantly.

fucking hate windows 10 virus.

It should work on 32-bit WIndows 10. And by "work", I mean divide by zero.

That's mainstream media for you pushing the idea that even if you're perfectly content you're never truly happy without stapling another human being to your life.

That has got to be the funniest response I've ever seen on oddware.

I cried hard reading this.

You betcha.

Giggity

polyhistor That's exactly what I had in mind!

Me too, Clint...me too :(

I still recall from too many decades ago reading about the following poem written by a computer: "Roses are red, violets are blue. Raindrops are smearing my ears with glue." Considering the limited vocabulary they gave it, and rudimentary syntax processing, not bad!

@@bobblum5973 Why is it raining glue?

@@PixelatedH2O This was many, many years ago, probably before the IBM PC and Apple ][ existed, possibly even in the late 1960s if I recall where I read it. Computer scientists were using big computers, learning to write programs that could make decisions using lists of data provided. Sort of like the earliest kinds of artificial intelligence. They wrote their program to try to use the rules of syntax, understanding how poems work, rhyming words, stuff like that. Not an easy thing to do, the human brain does it, but how? That's what they were trying to figure out. So they wrote their program, gave it a vocabulary of words, and even gave it the beginning part "Roses are red, violets are blue" and ran it to see how it would complete the poem. The one result I recall I quoted in my original comment. The computer had no idea that it didn't sound right, or funny, but not bad for a beginner! It followed all the rules of English it was programmed with. Obviously computers have grown more capable since then.