i found some holes in entps and infps deal breakers for entp dogma is bias towards something that someone beliefs or thinks that thing is best for everyone while infp have problem with someone's bias towards other people and I'm sure that with the right frazing it would be possible to say every mbti type hates bias toward something now try to guess with mbti type i am
As an ISTP I agree, being easily offended is a deal breaker, however I would also add (quite obviously) restricting my freedom as one too. The moment I notice that someone is trying to take away my freedom/control me, I'm out. I think this one might be more of a deal breaker for me than the first one.
I just found this channel and it's just baffling how diffrently people react. My reaction when people tries to control me is smile and just enjoy the ride. Maybe not for the long run, but it isn't a huge deal for me.
Over the course of my life when interacting with ISTPs, i noticed ISTPs are mavericks by nature. I'm an INTJ and we're similar in that sense when it comes to craving independence or freedom. INTJs by comparison are iconaclastic free spirits. It's no surprise that ISTPs and INTJs get confused or mistaken one for the other by lots of people.
I think a lack of integrity is a WAY bigger deal-breaker for INTJs. We absolutely NEED the trustworthiness and dependability of our partner to be beyond doubt. Not that a lack of integrity is acceptable for any relationship, but for we INTJs who invest so much in our future and who want to open our rich internal world to someone close to us a relationship can feel like playing with dynamite at times.
Yep, it's like if we INTJs finally resolve to enter into relationship, it means that we're ready to invest huge amonts of resources, labour and time into them, and if for the partner our relationship actually means nothing (...worth investing the same amount of dedication) or they can easily change plans towards us, then that's a disaster.
Yes, 💯. I think he’s not entirely wrong; I don’t dislike aimless people, sometimes I find them interesting. But it would indeed be a dealbreaker for a relationship even if I like them. Because I wouldn’t have enough clarity to know if it’s a good investment, until they resolve that uncertainty. In the same vein, untrustworthiness is also a dealbreaker, and is much worse as it loses my respect as well. Unlike an aimless person, an untrustworthy person wouldn’t even qualify to become a friend.
God, this. Nothing can screw with me more than eventually starting to trust and depend on someone, to open myself up to them and start caring about them... only for them to do a 180 and become unreliable, hot and cold and basically making me overanalyse every tiny thing they do because I don't know what to expect from them anymore. It's maddening.
INTJ here. Agree with someone above who said lack of integrity was a deal-breaker, but irrationality and over-emotionality are very irritating, too. However, the other big no for me is emotional manipulation. Just don't try to guilt or tease or "poor-me" wheedle me into doing something, or I'm done with you. All of the above applies just as much to friends, too. Ask up front, and take "no" for an answer.
I think all of these things would be a deal breaker for me. But I won't even feel emotionally towards someone to get into a relationship with them if they're aimless. I find them too boring to even consider them as a friend. And sometimes a lack of integrity can't be seen until you spend some time talking with them which could be a couple of dates to see that their morals aren't wholly in alignment with mine.
Emotional manipulation is a big no - no for me too, I'm an ISFP. Anyone who tells you that you are this and doing that, and you're not, needs to be kicked out of your life, ASAP. Especially if they are the ones, in fact, doing those things that they're accusing you of
Agree on ISTP. I would add that (for me at least) I don’t have to be part of the conflict to be annoyed. Even when i have nothing to do with the situation, If I see someone’s taking everything personal or making a big deal out of small things near me, my dislike of them instantly grows. I also relate with the INTP one, I love to hear different points of view and I’m always reevaluating my beliefs, people with too many bias usually can’t get out of their shoes and are highly hypocritical and that’s a big turn off for me.
I think your explanation hits home better. People who take everything really personally are just impossible to be around. And not in a sense that I go around offending people, either, far from it. Taking everything personally is a sign of being extremely self-centered and bad at viewing things from other points of view. Like if you genuinely thought I was trying to insult you, that means you think I'm the kind of person who would go around insulting people. And that's an insult to me. Hard pass.
INFP here too, I don't know how much of my INFPness comes from the fact that I'm gay. And that's a problem because there's some narrow minded views even inside of the community that I completely dislike.
@@luisj.m2471 As an INFP we put a high value on authenticity. It can be hard to understand why some people rely so heavily on stereotypes. But I'm sure it has a lot to do with an inability to read people.
That one hit hard. People who don't judge others by personality and action are seriously puzzling to me. If you can hate someone that easily, get therapy.
Agreed about INTPs and INFPs. And equally, the opposites, lack of bias/high openness for INTP, and tolerance/compassion for INFP are super attractive 😍
To be pretty much honest, some people that said to me in the lines of "because you do this ...... that means you will also do ..... on someone else" which basically is asking me to believe that I'm going to make something either bad or good to be a habit even though this was a statement or a "bias" enforced upon other people, which to me I sense BS in there. Also it's also a red flag that some people do this either they "feel bad for you" or just want to watch your reaction on falling for the statement. There's also another thing that sickens me is ageism, another form of showing bias that is becoming problematic because of age discrimination. I basically see a lot in roblox Games seeing Users literally mocking other calling them "you is a 5 year old??" or making other discriminations that possibly should not be spoken about in public that was somehow publicly shown in Video Game Chats.
Too real.. I'm an INFJ and was on a date with someone who kept bragging about how spontaneous he was. He would book flights on the same day the flight is happening, go to places like Paris and Cancun without booking a place to stay or plans, by himself. Most of the time he just takes selfies and leaves after wandering around the city like a homeless person. He was handsome but I felt soo unsettled by his attitude
@@meridiansplendour haha he felt kinda like a ISTP, very unbothered and impersonal. I would've made him do the quiz but unmatched as soon as I got home lol
hit the nail on the head in my ENTP opinion! i can't stand people who can't take a second to entertain a question or idea even if I myself know its silly and unrealistic. just pretend and have fun for a second! also the part of needing someone who provides a bit of structure but isnt controlling - 100% accurate
Spot on for me as an ENTP. On my online dating profile, I wrote under "strongest belief" something along the lines of: "if something can't be shown to be objectively or empirically true, you have no business demanding others to agree with you." Advocacy and strong feelings are wonderful, but know when it is and when it isn't a fact.
ENFP here, I'd say the biggest deal breaker for me would be the lack passion, or may I say, depth and intensity to their identity and beliefs. I also don't like overly conventional people but that is not just for the sake of being quirky, it's because most of the time, conventionnal people don't have a really deep motivation about these conventions. I'd say I need a partner who can be deep, intense, passionnate, and who is aware of where this passion comes from. Also I'd say a more personnal deal breaker for me would be people who judge people too quickly and do not seek to understand them first. In other words I'm in love with INFPs ? Hahaha
I agree, I was on a blind date not long ago, and the reason why I didn't go on a second with that guy was: HE HAD NO PERSONALITY TO BEGIN WITH, He didn't just lack depth, dude had nooooo interest in ANYTHING, I couldn't even hold a proper conversation with him cuz he only gave a 1-word answer and ended it.
As an INFP (or sometimes I get ENFP but I think I lean more to the introvert side) I couldn't agree more about my biggest deal breakers being judging without trying to understand ppl first, and lack of depth and passion. Also I LOVE other NFPs, it's like we get to form this big bubble of compassion and safety when we get together where one could literally admit to murdering someone and we'd all listen intently as to why they did it, trying to see the humanity in them before assuming they're just "bad". It's beautiful lol
INTJ: I think that idea is more of a theoretical one than that relates more to working partners than life partners. Our emotional and romantic side is quite different, as "aimlessness" might be totally fine in a romantic setting, depending on external needs (i.e. is there enough money to support both people). Case in point, look at INTJs and INFPs, which is a very common pairing, whose stereotypes -- that being the aimless INFP -- suggest a relationship that shouldn't work but very often does. If you want to see an INTJ fall head over heels, an INFP is a good bet. What is much more likely to turn us off is shallowness. If you're Instagramming Kardashians on your pink iPhone while talking about Taylor Swift's latest boyfriend, when we asked you about the war in Ukraine, then that is a deal breaker. Oh, and please eat with your mouth closed -- that's going to be another one for many of us.
are INFPs aimless? they have goals and if they can define them, commit and/or support intjs in reaching their goals, this is quite a good aim. i think they just struggle with formulating their goals in conventional terms and don't have a scheduled plan for their execution, but here intj can help.
As an ENFJ, that’s 100% correct. We don’t need to talk all the time (non-verbal communication is nice too, and I also need alone time), but it’s pretty draining when I’m the only one making an effort to communicate with the other person. Of course, because I always try to understand and take into account that everyone has different social batteries, it takes a really long time for me to break off a relationship with someone genuinely uncommunicative.
Same! I genuinely crave deep interaction with other people as I feel like that's the real them, or even just normal conversations so they can voice their thoughts, so when someone is unwilling to communicate it's def a major deal-breaker. I doubt I'd be able to have a steadfast and strong friendship or relationship with someone who is mostly unresponsive or uncommunicative
Exactly, i don't want to be the one who makes the first move all the time, it just feels unbalanced and awkward, like they don't actually wanna talk to me.
"Recklessness" Me who loves every reckless ENTP character: interesting... I think recklessness is only a turn-off when the reckless person doesn't know how to handle the chaos that they caused.
The absolute number one dealbreaker for me: the inability to laugh at oneself. This usually indicates the lethal combo of taking yourself too seriously and being easily offended. Hard pass.
As an INFP I totally agree, however this excludes sarcasm that's particularly negative. My bf and I tease each other constantly but we make it clear that it's all in good fun. I would NOT tolerate someone who delivered constant put-downs under the guise of "sarcastic humor" - that's just abuse.
I agree with what Nathan said about INFP and ISFP. Personally my preference changes until I get a certain type that I would eventually date. For me (ISFP), one is inconsistency. But unappreciative is spot on. When they tend to over-analyze everything. Life doesn't have step by step instructions for living. Of course there's time to be serious, but not all your life.
I'm struggling as an INFJ (me) with an ISFP. Asking too much shi and going for answers, truth and purpose. I think I'm overbearing and pushing them away.
INFJ, very subjective ofc but unsure if I'd say reckless for myself. It's never really crossed my mind. In a weird way, I've found people who romanticize to be deal-breakers most often? I don't want someone in love with the idea of love, or with their own idealized version of me. I don't want someone who enters a date thinking they can't be happy single and will only be complete if I like them back either. I want to authentically get to know a person, without pressure, and in a perfect scenario I'd like to grow together with them as we figure out our best selves. To have someone demanding my heart without even recognizing it as MINE or who I am just feels kind of horrifying. Inauthenticity/performance might be similar too. Would rather have a quiet and very specific/personal experience than something flashy.
Well as an INFJ, I suppose careless recklessness is off putting. But I have a fair mix set of dealbreakers (I guess I am complicated that way): Careless recklessness (as mentioned) Indifference (lack of eagerness to connect; lack of care, understanding, and negotiation; and lack of affection) Closed-off insecurity Fakeness
@@xpedro2960 I feel like indifference is the contrary of love so that's definitively a big dealbreaker for me too. I just don't know what would be specific to our type. Like of course the biggest dealbreaker is a narcissistic asshole but that's pretty much universal. Personally I could like someone who's a little bit reckless because I'm absolutely not spontaneous
I think the biggest dealbreaker for me might be someone who has 0 internal locus of control. I can sympathise with struggling, with being hurt, or having all kinds of difficult challenges, but I *need* to see you trying to get somewhere, that you're striving for something. If I see you struggling through the mud I'm willing to offer what little I have to support you, be it guidance or just sticking by your side through it all, but if you're just sitting there crying for someone to pick you up, I'm leaving you there on your own. I'm quite adamant on this: if I have to be your gf I don't want to be your mommy. And it's not that I lack compassion or don't understand what it's like to struggle, but it's just painful to watch an adult being a helpless baby who can't do anything without another holding the spoon for them. There are a couple of types who tend in this direction a bit too often for my taste. I'm not gonna add the "as a xxxx" cause I'm kinda tired of seeing it in other posts too lol.
Haha, I get where you're coming from with the last bit - ~as an INFP~ I also feel a little annoying when I add that to my posts - but it is very relevant and helpful to specify what type's perspective you're giving on a video on MBTI types. Don't overthink it. :)
these were really good. im an infp and before you mentioned mine i guessed from personal experience you would say someone who is narrow-minded. I absolutely love theorising and contemplating different philosophies and etc. Having someone dismiss these as unnecessary or pointless would be an easy way to annoy me. I guess being narrow-minded and intolerant are very much synonymous though :)
Agree on the inxj front. Reckless behavior makes me cringe and basically avoid said reckless human. Also am low-key control freak and best friend is also low-key control freak. We get along great, I think there is a mutual respect of the control-freakery and calculation towards our lives.
Yep, I'm an INTJ and can confirm I have dumped an ex after 3 years for lack or drive or passion. My partner wasn't lazy just too content about everything... think "Aimless" is spot on for INTJ's
Well, I try to add to that, maybe it has something to do with dedication, and dedication includes an active (and productive) involvement. A funny thing how INTJs can be smart manipulators, but, I guess, they hate relations where they actually feel themselves being in that role. Initiativeless partner for an INTJ is a dummy. And a dummy doesn't worth feelings and dedication.
That's funny, cuz I'm an INFP dating an ISFP and we're both completely aimless and I love it lmfao. We just float around enjoying and exploring everything 😂 couldn't put up with the rigidity of the INTJ's lifestyle (not that it's a bad thing, just to me it feels rigid).
@@octopus4925 (INTJ) I personally disagree with Harry O, as romantically, INFP has been my most likely match up, with ISFP a close second. As long as we have enough to live on, that's okay with me. I would rather be with someone exploring rich inner worlds than a repressed empire builder who doesn't know their own feelings.
I'm an INTJ and for me being "aimless" also refers to not knowing what you want out of me/from dating me. If I ask you why you ask me out/what you like about me and you say you don't know, that's a big red flag and I'm not going to waste my time waiting for you to figure it out.
only yesterday my intj boyfriend told me how utterly confused he is by aimless people (using our isfp friend as an example). You could see from his face that it really bothers him deeply, like few things can do. I wonder if there's a way to convince him that it's not a bad way to live, just different...
I'm an infp. Back in my dating days, 2 incidents caused instant, sharp rejection of my dates. One called me "babe." I was 20. I was probably a "babe." Don't ever call me that. The other took me out to visit a museum. Then he took me home with zero interest in any side trips or additional tangents. That, my friends, is the death knell to any Ne.
INTP here. When someone's "research" translates to stuff they read on Facebook. No critical thinking skills are a huge no. Another big one would be no curiosity about the world. AKL (always keep learning)
Finally someone who mentions our philosophical side. People are always so shocked when my Ni jumps out lol. These are 100% accurate for my type and everyone else I know. ESTP&ISFP is the perfect pairing, I will die on this hill.
ENFJ here. I have never dated but in the past, I had this one friend who would disappear whenever we're not together in person, no texts, no calls no nothing, every summer. And this was when I lived in the suburbs of the countryside, and everyone around me had to work or go to college, so I was alone for weeks at a time. Being alone is fun, until you can't escape, until it is the default. So early on I was upfront about this with my friend, but every summer, she would disappear. Eventually we graduated and I just can't stand the silence anymore, so I told her to fuck off if she wanted to so bad. Turns out she had a grudge and was ghosting me as revenge. Yikes. Never involve yourself with someone who can't communicate, from the little bantering to big issues.
@@Lhadten yeah, i get where you're coming from but I'm just talking about my friend who was unable to actually voice their problems with me (not THEIR problems, THEIR problems with ME) and then went on to avoid and ghost me, so in the end things turned sour. It's like your partner getting mad at you and then ignoring you, nothing gets solved, and problems pile up. I don't want my friends to share everything they're going through so your advice doesn't apply. I respect privacy in all of my relationships. In fact, I myself am personally very private about my issues. It seems that you're implying that ENFJs, and by extension, I am nosy. People aren't obligated to tell me anything so why would i take it personally? Excuse me but you misunderstand. Also this isn't an ENFJ thing as much as it is a general thing, you want to date someone that you can have healthy communication with. People can struggle at communication for many reasons but people are also responsible for their needs and communicating them. Sorry for the long rant but your response was simply off the mark. -Respectfully, Ruby.
@Lhadon T this is not my problem, your problem is that you are dealing with annoying ppl and my problem is that my friend ghosted me. I don't appreciate you projecting this onto me. I just said that I respect the privacy of everyone around me. Just leave me alone.
@@Lhadten yeah it's ok, ig i'm not over them either. It does suck when other people are being nosy too, like bro i don't wanna talk abt it. I kinda feel the pressure to "represent" the enfjs, like i'm not allowed to be flawed or it'll reflect on the others.
Hello. You nailed it for the ISFJ too man. I hate inconsiderate people. I also have an allergy to micro controlling people but thats not specific to my type i guess. Great work 😃
You hit the nail on the head for ISFJs. I was thinking at the start of the video that I wouldn’t be able to be with anyone who is dismissive of others’ feelings, but you’re right that it extends to other considerations too.
Very true for Isfj! Stability, consistency, and reliability is spot on. Without these traits, the potential for a relationship would be crumbling right away.
Some of these things mentioned are basically an expression of a type's 4th function. For example, the enfps dealbeaker would be overly conventional. Of course Si which is their 4th function can be overly conventional. But do types not secretly have an attraction towards such opposite things? I can see how types might think they dislike things (somewhat) related to 4th function, especially if they do not know themselves well.
I personally find people who use my 7th & 8th functions well as attractive (am I making sense? English is not my first language). Showcasing 4th function to some extent is admirable, but if too much, it'll be overbearing, and can be very frustrating.
I think people like witnessing and learning from that 4th function when others use it well, but they don't want it imposed on them or prioritized to a degree that negates their own dominant function.
literally this weekend a good, long friend of mine showed me an unforgiveable amount of intolerance and now I simply cannot feel comfortable around them anymore. It feels almost wrong... that such a strong friendship could be cut loose from one simple showing of character. I will be honest in saying I have 3 times now tried to speak with this individual to allow us to come to a certain understanding. But all I am given is more hate. why can't I just let it go like most people seem to be able to? Up until this weekend, this person was a valuable friend and I viewed them as a good person. but now I just can't anymore
Ugh yes. Fellow INFP and while confidence is nice, arrogance is a huge turnoff Edit: either misread that or you fixed a typo lol. Guess INFJ and INFP folks can have stuff in common (hardly surprising, two of my favorite people are INFJs)
I cannot date someone who is kind of fake, posing as someone he is not or lying. Arrogance falls into that for me, since it is usually a front of someone secretly insecure. I would rather date someone who is openly insecure.
@@mirriyastia7041 In some ways, yes. However, I find it usually is a mask for trauma and no matter how you cut it arrogance is a corrosive trait. It causes people to become blind and makes it hard to exit a sort of positive feedback ego-loop (perhaps it IS an ego-loop), it diminishes self awareness. So, while arrogant people MIGHT be straightforward I find that arrogance is a guarantee of low self awareness given that the entire point is to abolish weakness and appear superior and indestructible despite being a human with flaws and weaknesses.
@@alexmcmahon2810 idk, maybe for us INTJs it is somehow a natural trait to be socially blind, and I don't feel bothered by it in any way, as for me my inner independence is of the greatest value. Well, greater than someone's feeling about me.
I’m an ENFP. My INTP brother’s ENFJ partner wouldn’t answer a question I had about what he’d do in a certain time travel scenario because, “it’ll never happen, so why think about it.” Like a knife through my heart! 😵 I’m pretty sure I recall my brother also talking about biases that night. From my small sample size, this video is nailing it.
It’s so funny, because, I find a lot of these dealbreakers being things the types dislike are things they can be also drawn to, as it is more of their opposite expectation to their personal normalcy. The ENTJ dislikes overly-emotional people, yet a lot of them crave the authenticity INFP’s exude. They will actually bend their own principles at times, as frustrated as they may become, if they truly truly love someone. They see the INFP as a mirror of their weak points, but also a mirror of an inner self they cannot tap into and would rather not. It’s surprisingly powerful.
Couldn’t have said it better! As an INFP, I hate to be controlled or bossed around but I realized that I find myself attracted to them because they possess all the qualities I wish to have. Their dominance and assertiveness just turns me on and I love how they push everyone to their limits
@@orxihui Not true. Both enrich their lower functions, making them perfect for growth. And in all honesty, any pairing can go together with the right amount of communication.
My result on the official test was ESTJ, but for this video in particular, the ISTJ hit it exactly on the nail for me. What you described for ISTJ is literally my biggest relationship deal breaker.
INFJ here:🎯. Recklessness in thought annoys me profoundly. I spend so much time thinking beyond the first step/surface & deciphering how things are connected that it irritates me when others don't. People who cannot (or will not) think beyond face value, are insufferable. My biggest peeve- people who race ahead/cut off others in their cars only to end up in the slowest lane- which would've been obvious had they just looked ahead- are the worst. Stupid rude is the ultimate deal breaker.
Someone trying to control me (big brother style thought crime) and someone who doesn’t trust me enough to tell me the truth. Both relating to long term relationships (friends + love) - female entp
I resonated with both the Ti and Fi dealbreakers for this one (I am an INFP). The one about people who are easily offended brought to mind a person who used to be in my life who tended to blow hot and cold. They never communicated why they were behaving differently this week, and we weren't close enough for me to ask directly. Of course INFPs immediately assume that whenever an interpersonal breakdown happens, it's our fault. So I was constantly anxious about what I had done to offend this person until I got tired of it and stopped engaging.
I agree with all your points, per usual. I learn so much from you, and I’m always entertained at the same time. You’re always to the point, and communicate sensitive points in a way that’s not offensive. A great teacher
I am an estj and my mother is an entj and I am the child she get's on with the most. Also, yes we are both unemotional. I think emotions exhaust both of us. If there is one thing that my mother hates the most, it is making irrational, emotional decisions. Everything should be done in one's advantage
General avoidant tendencies often amount to a deal-breaker - or a resistance to explaining one's ... shall we say "uniqueness" ...combined with an entitlement to my blind acceptance ... Although I did learn the hard way to watch for these things and start quickly cutting ties before they become truly destructive, but in that case I would say it should probably be a deal breaker for any type or at least encourage better communication
Fair...to be honest, to me being inconsiderate is a reason to distance from a person, but unreliability truly enrages me. Too bad for me I am surrounded by unreliable people. Maybe this is why my personal ideal partner is my ENTJ lady and I get along the best with INTJs. (ISFJ but Si/Ti, so that might make some difference as I may be compassionate, but I am far from being emotional)
This INFP abhors arrogance dishonesty and insensitivity. Oh and I don't like being micromanaged or rushed. I like somebody who is easy going and open. I also would love somebody who is interested and exploring.
As an entp I agree, I’m a true neutral and I’m ok with anyone having their believes but when they impose their believes without listening to the other party it seems illogical and stupid, like I disagree with you but I’m not going around hating on it.
As an ENFP i would say "disingenuous" "fake" or "treats people unfairly". I think "overly conventional" could capture much of it for me, but not quite.
Ah yeah true, as an ENTP I couldn't stand when someone tries to impose their beliefs OR their standards to me. It pisses me off so much when they expect me to follow when they couldn't even answer my questions about it, at least give me a reasonable explanation and I'll think about it (doesn't mean I would do it- still, but I probably could too). Also, I'm actually a very chill person but I'm extremely impatient, so honestly I can't stand someone who doesn't take initiative.
Man, as an INFJ that was really spot on. I absolutely hate when someone makes a rash decision, or even a decision that they could've given more thought, to the point where I could internally scream lol.
*Date:* "thats just your opinion, man!" *Me:* No, its logic, its a literal syllogism! aaahhh! Ya know what, I'm out, I can't... I just can't with you anymore. Not everything is just some vibe or hottake. Facts and reasoning matters! I'm not saying I'm right just because I think I am, I can prove it too! And I'm not just saying I can prove it, I actually can and will!" *Date:* "Nah, I don't care anyway." *Me:* This is [super important political/scientific issue] HOW CAN YOU NOT CARE?! *also me:* ragequit. True story. 3 guesses what type I am haha (its won't be hard lol)
Okay, as an INTP, I disagree with XNTP guesses, and I think you're a XXTJ type. As an INTP it bothers me too when someone is being unreasonable or illogical, but I'm not as bothered when they don't 'care', because most INTPs are aware that you can't make others 'care'. It's the problem of Fi, not Ti. Ti checks for logical inconsistencies, not for moral inconsistencies. That doesn't mean there aren't things I care passionately about, but I think I'm fine (kinda used to it) when others don't share the same passion as I do about things. I think you're more likely to be an INTJ or an ISTJ but that reaction against unreasonableness and lack of caring is quite Te-Fi of you. I'm leaning more towards INTJ though, due to grammatical errors (STJs are usually more likely to be irritated by grammatical errors) My guesses: INTJ, ENTJ, ISTJ.
Close your eyes and listen to all descriptions without knowing which personality type is being mentioned and you’d feel that all descriptions or a big majority of them apply to you irrespective of your type. These all refer to the same thing i.e. the human condition.
My biggest dealbreaker is being forced to share my thoughts and feelings before I fully understand them. Or being asked questions that you don’t want me to answer honestly. -INTP
INTP and ISTP take it personally when they think their advice is not taken, yeah! I have been on the receiving end.. But how do they know their Ti advice is not taken, it might have been considered and processed by the other person internally but not taken action on it. And it’s better than someone pretending to act on it just to get close to them. Yeah, That’s a trick to trap them 😏 I have observed one intp closely for years now, crying about being hurt by close people all the time. The point is he has been pushing away people who might have his best interest but are independent thinkers who might challenge him and raise their voice. Rather, he has a tendency to allow followers or bootlickers in the inner circle. (Or young people who can be easily molded) This may not be true for healthy types, but there are some similar inclinations amongst these Fe inferior types. I mean these Ti advices are not personalized and may not work the same way for the other person in their circumstances. Being judging types, They can jump to conclusions rather than giving the other person the benefit of the doubt.
Oh crikey. ENTJ here. Can confirm. I like roller coasters, just not emotional ones. Strongly relate to some of the other dealbreakers too, mind you. Uncommunicative is an absolute dealbreaker for me.
A big dealbreaker for me is. When people blame me for something that i never did. Its one of the few things that genuenely makes me irritated. And as a reaction to that. I always had a "well if im going to be blamed for it, i might as well do it" mindset during such times. Ofcourse this dosent happen always. But its more of a build up. When i keep facing the false accusations, at one point a switch clicks. -INTP
Yep, I totally agree with you, even more when it happens on a daily basis... It's like they are stubbornly trying to change reality as they please and that I can't accept it. If I have to listen to you talking nonsense about what I did, I may as well decide to make it become reality. At least now they have a reason for saying so and I can finally make sense of it...
I had to think about “recklessness” for a second to put into context because I don’t think it necessarily equates to spontaneity…I don’t mind spontaneity so long as it’s not ruining any previously made plans or just being inconsiderate as a whole. I think the recklessness that I really can’t be okay with is recklessness with other peoples’ lives and feelings. Just like toying with someone because you might feel entitled? Or because you feel like you can? Absolutely not. Recklessness can be intentional and that’s something im not okay with. I suppose you could say all my other dealbreakers kind of boil down to… recklessness. Pretty spot on-infj
You are spot on with the ENFJ. I can forgive an insane amount of things, as long as the person pours their heart out and shares their deepest, most vulnerable thoughts with me.
i don't ask, i write it down and leave 1 or 2 days blank, so in case anything goes not according to plan - no food waste. he rarely proposed changes after looking at it, so i find it more efficient to plan by myself.
As an ENTP the deal breaker unequivocally is that the person is boring. I like dogmatic people because they offer an opposing stability because my mind is literal chaos. A healthy ENTP has two friends ones that they can endlessly bounce ideas off of, trampolines and people that are unmoving when we have to make decisions, pillars. The world of an ENTP is that of a trampolined Parthenon library. Say that three time fast.
As the mom of an ENTP twenty-something - this sound quite accurate. He also loves or seems to love pushing the boundaries of the unyielding, poking and prodding until he finds their boundaries and then pushing just a liiiiiitle bit more.
@@LadyIarConnacht Well that's not nice. Just because you're an ENTP doesn't mean you shouldn't respect people. I know full well where people's limits are, but I don't go out of my way to aggravate them. I find one of the most entertaining things, is knowing that we live in universe in which a single person's will cannot be reconciled with reality. But it's not my place to fix that. Reality seems to eventually fix that for people. I'm saying this to present one view of our personality type and validate you. With the hope that you will not use it as an excuse to try to change your son because eventually reality will do that for you. Thus presenting a paradox that proves my thesis, whether or not you act. Noodle that.
I'm an ESTP. For me, looks are huge. Literally the most important thing. The ultimate dealbreaker. Looks meaning not fat, nice facial bone structure and the breasts to waist to hips ratio. That's it. Anything else is literally not important in the slightest.
Oh my gosh, I had to watch the video twice just to be sure, but it’s hilarious to me that the Te leads were the ONLY types where you put a disclaimer out to people who might want to be in relationship with us and how they will need to help improve/change us. All the other types: “If you’re in a relationship with these types, be aware of this and this is how it might go. Be aware of who they are!” Te leads: “If you are in a relationship with them, be aware of this and this is how it might go. Also, don’t let them be like that all the time. Better not let them be too much themselves!” Awesome. 🤣
Recklessness is definitely something that makes me unconfortable as an INFJ, and you put a word on it for me. Additionally, I personally don’t like people who “micro-manage” me or show any signs of manipulation. I can’t help it that I’m always psychoanalyzing people, and if a potential partner shows signs of guilt-tripping me or making me feel belittled, I’m definitely out 😅 If I had to put a word to it, I’d call it being judgemental. Just let me (and others) do what they want and not judge them for it. It drives me crazy when someone is overly judgemental
I am an ISFP, and only recently when discussing a young ambituous book character that chooses wrong ways to climb the social ladder, I admitted to my friends that fiery passion and intensity is what I can't help but like and respect in people
9:00 THIS! This is insanely accurate(to me at least😂) Like, pleeeaase the one word answers are killing me. I wanna know more about you🥺 No offense to anyone who is more private and would rather keep things to themselves, I never wanna force people to be open if that's something that they're uncomfortable with. Although, I personally couldn't date someone who was that way because I find it extremely difficult to be close to people who can't be expressive towards me. Honestly they probably wouldn't wanna date me either because of my stupidly long and detailed answers to every single question would probably drive them nuts😂
Honestly, if a person is only giving one-word answers, they probably shouldn't be dating at all. I'd be like, what's their motivation? Why are they REALLY here with me? What are they hiding?
I do wonder what is leading to this situation, just what are these questions? are they to things that they are unsure of themselves? or think the answers would be too boring? or are far more interested in your answers to realise they are not holding up their end? do they interpret the questions as simple requests for information that can be easily answered rather then what I would guess are meant as exploratory probes to start a conversation?
i don't like when people are shallow and just want to do a bunch of aimless things all the time. u have to be able to slow down and be meaningful. u have to care a lot and think a lot, i guess. (- INFJ)
INFJ here. Totally agree with the careless attitude, I cannot help but detach myself from reckless people because I do not want be dragged by their careless decisions. I do not know if this is common to most INFJs, but I cannot stand irrationality, people that cannot be reasoned out of their ideas, that refused to follow the logical path until the end to understand your message. I just cannot deal with that type of people.
INFJ - for me, a dealbreaker is when you are too intense. I need to have a "space" in my surroundings, a space to breathe, think, focus. When you are too overwhelming, I will be exhausted in a minute.
Omg. When you asked the question at the beginning, I said “Lack of communication” and I am an ENFJ. You listed ENFJ’s deal breaker as “uncommunicative” … 🤯
infp and I agree. Especially when it’s not even deserved. Like some people are arrogant (or maybe a little overly confident) but they deserve to be because they did something valuable to yet there. And there are just some who are standing on someone else’s victory and think of themselves as the best of all. Yuck.
intj: back when i was a teenager and dating, after some trial and error my main question became differently phrased version of "where are you going in life/do you have ambition". i noted how some intjs pointed to integrity - but would you even get to that stage with someone who completely lacks direction? :)
I wasn’t expecting the isfp one. Don’t know how much I’m living and appreciating my life really. It needs effort on my part, meditation etc. But I was nodding my head at infp because intolerance is ofc not sexy. I also don’t have the patience for guys who are rigid in their thinking ie the entp "dogmatic" spoke to me. Not being able to communicate their emotions or have that much empathy is also a deal breaker
While highly emotional probably won't work in the long run, it is not a deal breaker for me (ENTJ). What is a deal breaker is when people are manipulative (for instance with feelings), indirect/sneaky, or agree to certain things and then don'tfollow through. In away, it is about dishonesty, That said, communicating with the highly emotional can be hard. But itis not morally wrong, and hence not a deal breaker per se, dishonesty in its many facets is.
I'm infp, and with us (as usual) I think there's a contradiction in here We can't stand absolute intolerance to an idea, be that judging someone we connect or empathise with too harshly, or refusing to 'play'(for lack of a better word) with strange, what ifs in that endless imagined universe in our heads, but (to me at least) in can be equally as disturbing when a person is never disgusted by anything, I mean as in never standing completely firmly on something that is immoral, never having a set of values that you *will not* deviate from
I'm an INFP. If someone is intolerant, then that is extremely unattractive. But, what irks me most out of anything is inauthenticity. If I get even a hint that someone is being even slightly fake with me, then that is an immediate turn-off. This is because of my own personality being built upon being authentic to who I am, and if someone isn't being real with me, then they're ashamed of who they are or have something to hide: both making me suspicious and untrusting of them.
Though I agree with the enfp description on deal breakers, one major deal breaker as an enfp would be lack of logic. The older I get the further I realize how much I appreciate logical information. It could be the reason why I seek logic in my partners. No logic= I’m not interested. Logic doesn’t always mean cruel or boring.
Agreed for INTJ (me) and INFJ (close friend of mine). But you know, INFJs really provoke their close ones to be reckless with them)) while usually I try to be serious and keeping my moral integrity concerning my actions and behaviour, but restrained and passive attitude of my friend literally provokes me to make him bring out his emotions, e.g. to take him on 20-km walk to make him tired as hell, or to make him do something...mmm...hardly legal^^ together with me, or to say some dirty or black jokes in his presence - just to make him behave seemingly, to see some bright emotions on his always sadly-accustomed face.
Just noticed how this kind of video is GREAT for infjs and enfjs, since they're good manipulators and can use this kind of information to create a relationship with someone
Someone who wants to put me in a box, limiting my freedom of thinking and preferences. I also don’t care for living in the moment not thinking about future type. I do enjoy a person who is very much present but not as a long term partner.
People defining who I am. It feels restricting. Kinda like being put in a cage. In such circumstances, the brain only gets to think of 1 thing: I have to break free. Metaphorically speaking: life is a book with blank pages. And I would rather do the writing and holding of the pen on my own than having someone else do it for me.
Interesting conclusion. Especially because both my dominant and inferior function, as well as the (lack) of clearly defined boundaries and systems that the 7th function would have (in other positions in the stack) are kinda visible in my answer.
i dont like organing peaple. also i dont dislike them. but organisation is often an unneccessary circumstance which often function like a chain or an obstacle for me. Its a complicated topic, which I am not able to solve with one or two eaasy sentences
