20240724 

as the long segue into exploring spaces and drones started coming together, i realised they are not where i want or need to be.
there was always the strong temptation to add layers of greater texture and variety, melodic gestures and pointillism, followed by the realisation that the drone basis wasn't gelling with the additional layers in a consistent way ...
in that respect, the focus on creating the long evolving monoliths, in the expectation of creating a live set, is starting to feel increasingly like a distraction.
on the upside, all the sound design code that has gone into that is now providing a basis for returning to the basic idea i had in mind under the "between silence and light" working title: pointillistic, expressionistic abstractions, but with the hopefully retained emphasis on obtuse harmonies, solitude, and spaciousness.
similarly, there is now a growing realisation that, with some appropriate trickery and switchable key mapping of pitch collections, i can move away from generative strategies towards more actual (gulp) playing (of keys, initially at least ...)
this live improvisation was essentially me trying to mock up something for myself to discern whether this can work. there is enough here i think to now focus on reinventing and refining this approach, with a growing list of code based edits and implementations to try and bring this sound and these tools to greater fruition.
even within the drone explorations, there was a fundamental desire, within all the brooding and gong like resonances, to have some sense of a constant "fading away" that was in essence often lost along the way behind the desire to achieve "the monolith of sound" ... perhaps coming at it from this angle, i can eventually find the way to "have my cake and eat it too" ... for the "cavernousness" and "non-musical" aspects of the sound are still things that i would be happy to integrate into the overall picture.