Im a bi woman who fell hard for a guy in a poly relationship with another woman and your words have been very helpful. Notably about "is there someone with a veto power even if they dont call it their primary partner" - yes, exactly that. He says he doesnt rank his affection but there absolutely is someone whose comfort predominates over everything else and idc that "she's fine with it", i care that potentially, she could not be, and that would be enough to meddle with anything he and i share. I also want kids at some point and "dad is away with his other lover this weekend" is not a perspective i would accept. Even if it breaks my heart, i think id better cut it there. Love your honesty brian, you are a champ.
Thank you for the insight, though I am aware of how poly and open relationships work to a degree. I am now entertaining the idea of seeing someone who is in an open and has a person. What I can tell anyone else thinking about it or are entering into starting one. Get very clear on everything so there are no grey areas. Ask questions like is this a 1 time thing, is this a friends w/ benefits, etc. Not to take the sexy out of it, but think of this like a business contract set your terms and conditions, get their terms and conditions and that way you can make a clear minded choice. Allow the opportunity to come back to the table to renegotiate the terms as it is needed. Do not be afraid to speak your worries, thoughts, wants, or needs. The more open you are with your communication in the beginning the better it is for all parties thst are involved. Lastly each poly or open relationship will have it's own rules of engagement to be a healthy one for everyone.
Brian! I need some advice. I went on a date with a man in an open marriage. He is very honest about his wife and family. On the first date we fooled around a bit but I don’t feel comfortable going all the way. He asked me out on a second date and I told him I don’t move so fast and although I find him intriguing I would like to get to know him more before becoming more intimate. He hasn’t responded yet. Are my boundaries reasonable? I don’t just jump into bed with someone - whether he’s in an open relationship or not. I can’t tell if he’s just looking for a hook up buddy.
When people leave the sexual design we are created in, the end is not pretty, to say the least. That's repeated over asnd over in history, so, go ahead and repeat the awful end that zillions of other victims have died in and from, with nothing much to show for their next generation, which does not exist, nor do they have the family that people are designed to have around them in their elder years. Sorry to see you go, but, hey, live and let die....
I have no idea what you are talking about people have thrived in ethically nonmonogamous relationships for all of human history so thanks and have a good day!
@@thisisbgm of course you have no knowledge of my point! The manufactured phony history your handlers feed you leaves out the horrible fate of societies who run against sustainable, natural replenishment of mortal creatures. Your blind way leads to man's extinction, exactly what man's eternal enemy is determined to do to man.
