My parents, my brothers, my friends, my work colleagues, my bosses, my ex-wife, my future wife, (likely) my kids, Wenzes (due to the lack of engagement from my posts but others), people on this video, people who pretend to care, people who think they are INFJ, people who think they are generous (but are secretly narcissists), people who are evil, people who are manipulative, the person reading this, the person reading this (in proxy) and me.
I get so tired of this. If you're not serious, with a furrowed brow, that means you don't know what's going on. When in reality we're the only ones that truly understand. Beyond frustrating.
Ex narcissist boyfriend who called me "Edith Bunker"😮. His nose still hurts after the door 🚪 slam.😅 Now I know to say right away, "I will not be disrespected."
1. Anyone with authority who doesn’t like being questioned or welcome new ideas. 2. People who prefer to communicate through hidden messages. 3. People who feel insecure when they see someone else’s light Moral of the story… be an INFJ anyway 😘
Omg not putting certain people on a pedestal in the corporate world is totally what I do. In my previous jobs, I always found it strange how my co-workers would walk on eggshells. If I expressed any kind of feelings of not being treated well by my manager I always had this feeling like I was being some kind of troublemaker. This shut up and do your work and take the abuse is not for me and it shouldn't be for anyone. I see us all as equals and we all should be treated fairly. I think this is why I'm not big on celebrities' lives. I might admire them but I see them as the same as me.
The most dangerous person is an unpredictable person. As you stated, by not reacting to their aggressive behavior, it angers them even more because they dont know how or when we will react. If they can get you to react, they can control you, and we refuse to be controlled.
As an INFJ, I'm friendly and kind until I'm not. I'm an alpha but I watch, listen & learn so I can know who I'm dealing with. I trigger bullies just by being friendly and intelligent. When i determine that they're bullies, then I pull away. If they keep coming at me, I will find a way to create a distance between us. If they continue to harass or try to intimidate me, I give them a tongue-lashing like they've never had before. I can be quite scary when I finally react. 😅 I've told narcissistic people that they're narcissists and I don't tolerate their manipulative, self-serving behavior. They might end up hating me, but they know not to F with me anymore. 😊 I had a female acquaintance who put me on a pedestal but she was shocked when I finally told her off for her immoral, bad behavior. She was cheating on her husband and using me as her counselor. She didn't listen to me anyway, she just needed a priest image so she could confess her sins. I knew it was the end of her imaginary friendship with me and I was So glad to get her off my back and out of my life. 😏 As a result of my many interactions with many unsavory people, I love being alone with my rescue dogs. 😌
The things that hurts the most is when people you have validated before and helped invisibly turns out you and decides that you're the problem, because they are so unwillingly to see the real problems in their own lives.
Once worked at a restaurant, along an “alpha” who kept trying to get me to react. Gotta say, it was fun to make silly reactions they didn’t expect, like I couldn’t understand. LOVED to see the frustration.
I had to switch positions due to an "alpha" female, older that was threatened and in her feelings about me being smart, hard working, friendly, liked by others and good at what I do. She would literally yell at me mid restaurant for doing my job. People could t believe it because she is so phony and fake to everyone else. I've learned that the food and beverage world is full of fragile egos.
Yes, yes, yes. The number of times I have put myself down in order for others to feel good is insane. I do it unconsciously as a survival strategy in order for me not to seem threatening. That was necessary in my family home to keep the peace.
I had a severely bullying boss who decided one day (after a few years) to really come after me and not let me get a word in edgewise. Everybody was afraid of him. When he tried it on me, I slammed my fist on the desk and shouted WHAT THE F*** !!!! and he ran out of the room. I figured I was fired, but he left me alone for the next few years. It was a hellish place to work but he finally triggered my INFJ rage big time.
"You may be nice on the outside and send only positive messages, but inside you judge them quite harshly." Yes, this so much. I feel like this is what is a major difference between me and my ENFJ bestie, she really gives people the benefit of the doubt, but also let's you know when she starts judging you. While I can try to optimise my communication for whatever direction I want this to go, even if my internal thoughts are different. And then people get whiplash when they cross me once too often. I should be more authentic, either I care and stay with the positive messaging or I let them know what I think, albeit gently.
I would suggest, as a middle aged INFJ, post several “dark nights of the soul” that it isn’t necessarily that we seek to validate, so much as we see the light within others, so clearly, it outshines superficial defenses. We genuinely love to express the beauty we see, in the world, in general. Not specifically to “validate” a person who has an insecurity. Quite the contrary, in fact. I only choose to suppress the desire to acknowledge a person’s light, when I sense that person needs validation, frankly. It’s about the motive. In principle I believe in validating the soul; the light in the world, not to pacify insecurities.
"we are not the person that they thought we were"..... who's responsibility is that ? Not ours. It's on them to make adjustments. Not our job to do. In that way we teach people... a lot ! And that is completely ok.
I have experienced each of these kind of triggered people. Your explanations rang true as per usual. We just don't play the games other people love to play. We may play them for a while but we get bored or realize the futility and move on. This makes people who love the games they play very angry with us.
👍 I don’t want to get angry. I’ve told several people over the years that we’re always testing. “You don’t want to release the monster. It will not end well “! They always backed off. I was serious I knew it would be ugly. Women like to push and bullies like to push. Bullies ended up in a heap not always physical. Some Women think they can get away with anything. Wrong and they get told.
Wenzes! You're awesome! I've been following you for 3 years now, and your channel has helped change my life! I think INFJ's are a people group, that mostly misunderstands themselves, and they are most hard on themselves. Your channel has helped reveal that we are just as human as everyone else, and there is no need to be ashamed of who we are. We are the most genuine people, and it's a shame for others to undervalue us. I believe INFJ's need to step up more in leadership and find the spirit of entrepreneurship because that is where we thrive and that is where our skills are needed. I just wanted to thank you again, Wenzes, for what you do and encourage you to keep on doing what you're doing! Blessings!
Geez! This infj gift is not for the faint of heart i tell u. A mere mortal tasked with bearing this power would crumble and fall. This gift surely i say! "Its for the chosen few ones" which yes! The INFJ race of mankind🎉❤
1:07 #1 The validation-chasing person 6:37 #2 The play-by-the-book person 13:06 #3 The aggresive person 18:44 #4 the delusional person 21:07 #5 The person who had put you on a pedestal
I think for a long time I had no clue of the types of behaviors that are out there and I didn’t even have those types of behaviors on my radar to watch out for. I think I have a tendency to not even notice what’s happening until I feel utterly confused by why I get bad “ vibes “ about a person or a certain reaction from them that I didn’t expect . Interesting video … I need to put these behaviors to memory and see what I notice now that they’re on my radar. It’s not that I never think people could have ulterior motives that affects their behaviors but I just don’t recognize what specifically is happening if that makes sense because I don’t act that way lol so I automatically assume it’s rare that others do .
that 2nd one is big for me... I always have to create my own system... and as soon as I come along a lot of people will start breaking the rules but it's not my fault... i think they break the rules much worse than me. and they will selectively pick rules they want to enforce...
Thank you so much for this video while breaking down every nemesis of the INFJ 😄. Sure we attract narcissists, but what about people that aren’t heavily on that side of the spectrum? Narcissists aren’t the end all be all in who we trigger the most, and you explained in detail the other types we clash with and why? Thanks again for everything 🤗
There are lots of different kinds of Narcissists, some of them are not recognizable unless you know how the different types manifest. They all seem to have some kind of radar that helps them find empaths they can vampirize for energy or ego boosting. Dr. Ramani and a few other experts on youtube can really help with identifying the different types.
I got that from family, friends, work many times. I also have had avoidant personality disorder, so you end up taking things and come across as weak, and that's why they target you. But a rare personality will not fit in like most others and that can make you a target. Can't damn win.
This INFJ would probably barely acknowledge the "Aggressive Person" and walk away or sit down calmly. If this situation wasn't so serious it might be funny to an outside observer. If necessary, maybe even show some "controlled aggression" just long enough to catch them off guard, but they'd have to push pretty hard to get there.
All of this sounded familiar, especially number three and number five. Actually, for number five, it seemed I was either put on a pedestal or put on a "reverse pedestal." Either the people I was with thought I was a genius, or they thought I was the dumbest thing on four feet. Both extremes made me nervous. Sometimes it seemed like there was a combination of these points, e.g. the aggressive person who also played by the book. For the people who treated me badly, I found that the most effective thing was to let them know I wasn't going to put up with it. And by the way, your "clap back" video from a while back was a real help in knowing how to handle it.
Your amazing; I have always kept true to my values and myself, and it seems the more true I am to my self and moral values, regardless of how much respect I reciprocate, to my co-workers and superiors the more they distanced themselves.😮 Their issues are not our problems
I remember being triggered BY these 5 types of people on my one and only long-term job, but if they were triggered by ME, I can understand why, now that I think about it. I was labeled as "insubordinate" by my jerk-faced superiors (and I had more than my share of write-ups to prove it), a "deaf-mute" and "Miss Quiet" by my fellow female co-workers (because I refused to get caught up in their angry teenage High School drama.) As for the employees who worked at the automotive facility, they were the worst of them all; a REAL bunch of Narcs if ever there were any, forever looking down their noses at us security officers while expecting us to idolize them, just because they had better positions with good money. That job is long behind me, thank goodness, but now that I look back on spending seven whole years in that den of wolves in sheep's clothing, I'm only sorry that I couldn't have triggered them even more! Unfortunately, I needed the job. I had just moved out on my own at the time and had to pay the rent and the monthly bills.
The most important person anywhere is the janitors! without them we would be living in filth, so they are the most important person !! so show respect to them !! stop kissing any arse''s or the bosses, bullies and buffoons !!
Very good, i used this method because i didn't know my strength of skills. All of the camouflage i used actually made become a master of my own faith. To actually feel that and how inspiring it is makes me feel more than just a human. I am in my 40's and i am right now learning these things and about the Sigma lifestyle that i really like and endorse. Now i start to focus on my own path instead of being that good little boy serving others. When you see why they call you to meet them that's when you study them. They don't call just to ask how you are doing but what they see in you that they can have a use for. It's very sad but true, i can see now how i can become very frightfull in thesemoments, when i fall back and don't wish to see them is the moment i feel how i grow inside and it can be scary. Sigma isn't just a herbavor behaviour, it can become a carnivor at the end just to survive.
That first point was very true. All of my family members had been used to me being supportive of them and in their eyes I was positioning myself at lower social value than them. When they find out that that is not how I actually view myself in the dynamic they cannot handle actually treating me as an equal.
Thank you again young lady. You are such a big piece of my puzzle and spot on 90% of the time there’s no such thing as perfection but you get pretty close lol if I could ever buy you and your husband a steak dinner it would be my pleasure. You really help me a great deal, because when you have a better understanding of who you are and why you do what you do, you can breathe easy even if the world doesn’t make sense, we make sense🐶😎🐶☝️❤️
YES!!!! I have been listening to your videos and taking your advice for a long time and I recently noticed that the bullies have just moved away from me. Finally!!! They just leave me alone and let me do my thing. Yayyyyy
Mola Ali as said " When this world favor someone It gives him the attributes he does not possess and when this world goes against someone it takes away the attributes he possess". So this is the reality of this world." So always come from the place of authenticity without caring much about who is going to like you and you will be happy.
I wonder if sadhgutu also made sure there would be enough places to clean the mental confusion he allowed to happen in this particular Form? This is 1000 times worse than corona and Dangerous to all surrounding and involved in this huge mess of unprepared, unnecessary mental chaos, and with this degree of instability plus the undeniable absence of any proper guidance
What the solution when it's a neighbor that gets triggered and do everything to get a response, noise campaigns, tormenting, harrassing,door slamming, . I cant afford to move , but they watch everything i do and if they hear me talking they get quient just to try hear what im saying . What do you do ? Yes they will not stop .
I feel you! We are introverts and very private person but we have this feeling that we wanna be an influencer or we wanna make a difference in this world. 😊
I know a few INFJ's online that I don't get triggered I see them as humble and caring people the only way I get triggered if they're unhealthy INFJ'S or those who think they are INFJ'S when they are not those who give advice that goes against what is true about INFJ'S INFJ'S go above and beyond for people they don't just put their whole energy in themselves I see a recurrent pattern of this focus on your selves it's counter intuitive like the blind leading the blind .
Am 50 yes this pic is me last month . I get told by 30 -40 somethings that am just a kid i din’t understand stuff am like jo i understand many perspectives that freaks them out why just agree how boring is that
I just keep getting better mind body spirit ❤ raise my daughter alone no child support . That even triggers people . Depends where u live am being told environment location makes a huge difference . Me disabled veteran i just get ignored its WONDERFUL not gay either but i don’t care if u are idc what you are really . Aggressive people easier to deal with quite ones waaay more scary that just ruin reputation you have no clue you have. Transparent much better when it comes to narcissist
Yes and I find in my life I often had part-Polish girlfriends (I mean regular friends)... but in Scotland in my ancestral land there are SO MANY Poles in basic labor jobs... and there will always be one Polish woman who is like honey to men, very clever at flirting and so uber-popular. And they do get triggered by me. There's one right now. We're cool most of the time, but there tends to be a moment when they want to take me down. It's like you said they haven't achieved anything in particular. But on the other hand they can have some basic decent skills and hard work. I am not looking for a man, but it makes me disgusted si see all the men competing for htis flirt. It disgusts me. But there was a Latina woman who had that quality at my job in the US, and she really had a problem w me, and every now and then would try hard to take me down. It was brutal but I confronted it harsh too. In the end I kinda won.
Is it better for infj live alone ? .. the tenants arent tenants and its a dellusoonal man with no boundaried.. im getting emotionally abused and ive been hermit mode for 1 year. I have not been authentically me .
Have removed myself over and over. There is a lot of minions. Most people like that don’t even engage directly… just blurt some dumb rhetoric and walk by.
I'm certainly not aggressive it's the fact you can't give an NiTi+ response that gets under your skin but no that stubborn Fi authority always thinks it's right. I merely illustrate my points logically nothing more nothing less, it's not personal, you're simply just not a cognitive INFJ & can't move past that. Go get professionally typed like I did & see what they have to say if you're really that sure. Show your sources...Jung I don't think so
The one stepping yo me busy running a scam at a homeless day gathering shelter with their Grandma dressing up and pretending to be somebody else to get seconds. Lol their granny puts on a rasta hat with a wig and a covid19 facemask and pushes around a shopping cart. Then she goes and ximes back as herself no cart,no face mask and no rasta hat with wig. 😅