The issue of space is tricky for me. It's so hard to find someone secure enough to give me room to breathe, relax, and grow without taking it as some kind of personal attack. The idea of romance is great, but give me a life-long genuine friend instead.
This is reassuring bc I have a heavy suspicion that my guy is an INTP, and we spent a long time just being friends and figuring out each other’s vibes. It’s only recently we brought up the idea of us being more than just friends, but we definitely give each other a lot of space and independence.
Another: Be prepared for our obsessions and weird random thoughts/ideas! And hearing every itty bitty detail about them. We love hearing about yours, too. There's not much out there that we can't find deeply fascinating.
I just rejected a guy because he is close minded, treating my sharing as snake oil. The stuff he shared with me was repetitive (almost the same text several times in the last 2 months). No original thoughts or ability to go into tangent. I know I’d be bored with this guy in no time. Tbh I had an inkling at the beginning. So glad I listened to my intuition to wait and see.
#1, #2, #4, #5, #6 - 100% agree... #3 - you can get us chatting non-stop for days if you want, just open and be able to hold an interesting discussion... Just don't bomb us with things like "what are you doing?" or "thinking about you."... #7 - at least from my perspective, that name is so wrong. I mean, sure, start from friendship, go slow, but when I am interested in you, it's for real... And from the few other INTPs I know, I don't think we really do friends with benefits. It's either friends or it's partners for life, there is nothing in between.
Preach! Thanks for posting this comment. It makes me feel better that I’m not alone here. Everyone I have ever REALLY dated or had an intimate relationship with where I actually got vulnerable with has tried to get me back. I’m not interested in showing up completely vulnerable or being expected to provide husband-like love and support if the intimacy is not reciprocated. I hate feeling like I’m being put into a box or category.
Leave them alone and let them come to you. This type actually ENJOYS being alone (it’s just me, myself, and I)..They will ghost you the minute things get complicated and you cause them mental stress. This goes for family, friends, lovers, doesn’t matter
I'm an entp in love with an intp. We're going sailing together and she is usually quiet when we're with others. But as soon as we're alone she starts talking endlessly about physics, philophy and politics. I love those topics too and it just makes me smile when she opens up and starts doing little dances or laughing. I hope I can slowly become closer to her so that we can meet outside of our hobby.
Yeah, I think that, at least in my experience, INFJ really tend to click with us INTPs. It's not without some huge challenges though... like wrapping our logical brains around your feelings is a really tough nut to crack... :D and I think that our brutal honesty must be rather hard for you to take, no?
Hey all of you, hope you're doing well and I hope your experiences with INFJs are going well As an INFJ, I'd love to know how to deal with those challenges better as I don't want to hurt my INTP Any tips are really appreciated (especially if it comes to the independence part) and if I can do anything to help in your cases, please let me know, I'd LOVE to assist you and make those silly INFJs feels more understandable lol
@@nostalgiken Hey! INFJ here. I can advise you on two things: 1) Ask yourself why you are not comfortable with the independence and space. It might be an insecurity you developed from family or previous relationships. You need to overcome the misconception that love is about calling all the time and spending all the time together. My fiancé' lives 10 minutes away from me. We see each other 2-3 times a week. I had to reduce my need for physical presence and he had to increase his willingness to go out. We do make sure we spend at least one night of quality time a week, go out for fun, and do family visits or attend events. However, we stay in touch throughout the day; we're always sharing interesting info or discussing matters. We lead independent lives, but we are there for each other when needed. This is what matters at the core level. 2) Communicate your needs without being afraid of rejection or having a request declined. Don't take things personally with an INTP. Also, INTPs do not get nonverbal cues easily, and from experience, when I clearly state what I need and want or expect, he is very understanding and receptive. He caters for me. Just don't make him feel guilty nor lacking 🥺 Relationships in general need soo much work and effort, constant communication and conflict resolution.
@@emyrein123 i wish i could take like half a day to a day to occasionally recharge.. but i know it's important for my enfp to stay in touch so i make that sacrifice. 😪
The last one is so spot on... I'm having a hard time finding someone, because I don't really want to find anyone but I still miss physical proximity. But I can't have it with just anyone so it would need to be someone I'm genuinely interested in, who brings something to me (knowledge, know-how), but without rushing anything but still... proximity because I like cuddles lol
Pretty accurate description I must admit. One big turnoff I noticed about a potential mate is how open he is towards new experiences. I met a guy a couple months ago, He is an endurance sport practitioner. I mentioned GTN (global triathlon network) and his eyes lit up. I am not doing endurance sport but I self learn swimming so I follow a few youtube swim coaches, GTN is on my radar. He started to text me his racing and shirtless photos. I admire people who stick to doing something (I change my interests ever so often) but it is not romantically related. Because of this concern, I wasn’t going to jump in. Sure enough, time reveals why I had reservations. He’s proud of his races and physical fitness to a point of using it as bait and acts peacocky. Also He turned out to be a Si dom like my mother. They stick to doing the same thing over and over, not inclined to try something new. This guy is 5 years to be 70 and has no flexibility. He has no interest in improving his range of motion after I shared my experience and study. That was when I realized that he’s not my match. Being a friend is fine but I can’t be with a guy who isn’t open minded and dismisses my study as snake oil. Insulting an INTP’s field of expertise is high treason.
As an INTP, I sometimes get anxious meeting new people. By "new" people, I mean people that I've known for less that 2 years. During that time, I'll often remember 90% of what they said and see the patterns of honesty and dishonesty in their statements. It makes me anxious because sometimes I'll ask questions that drill into a character flaw, a weakness, or a situation where someone is being less than honest. I hate this because I have to be on guard against myself to not engage someone in a way that makes them feel uncomfortable for shading the truth or lying. After a few years, I get used to their patterns and forget 50% of the weird things they said in the beginning. I don't step on landmines in conversations as much. Maybe this is why everyone I have dated, I've already known for years. They are used to me and I understand where all of their bodies are buried and won't accidentally initiate a conversation on a sensitive topic.
Yes yes yes DO that! I am an INTJ psych professor retired, recently widowed and met an INTP in whom I was interested. I was very attracted. And now after watching THIS am even more so, it explained some phenomena that had me concerned ...now IM not at all!
This video is on point, so accurate. I'm an INFJ engaged to an INTP. We fell passionately in love after we had originally friend-zoned each other. Being friends made our connection very organic and genuine-- no games played and being open to show vulnerability. This created an authentic relationship that evolved into deep love. #7 is totallyy riight! Giving space, open-mindedness, and understanding how their emotions and feelings work are the most important points to take into consideration for a long-term relationship. We often clash when I approach issues with emotions while he analyzes them logically. However, I keep in mind that he has a sweet, baby heart, and he never means to hurt me.
As an INTP who literally went through a relationship with an INFJ (see Golden Pair), I can fully vouch for the disturbing level of accuracy. I appreciate the video/content because it helps me to feel better about these things and view as strengths, rather than weaknesses.
Well yes this is mostly (ok 100%) me and has also been the reason why I’m not engaged anymore…. My recent ex and I even did a MBTI test and my ex and I where perfectly matched… ENTJ and I’m obvs INTP. I thought I was doing it right but then I don’t think she actually bothered to notice all these subtleties… well that’s a lesson for me to tell my next partner to read up and watch videos
Huging and cudelling ❤️ I tend to do it even If I don't know how to pacify my sad friend... Also If IT Is not friend I tend to buy stuff to those people... But last time when someone told me they are not doing good it was like how I didn't know what to do with kind of makes me sad because ussual stuff is to buy person thing, but truth also was that I didn't have money and all I had I gave atleast to coffee stuff
0:40 Yup. 1:59 Yup. 3:15 Yup. 4:31 Yup.🤤 6:10 I confess. 7:38 Yes, please. 8:52 This is it. Let just agree that couples make families and not the other way around. It's gonna be all right.
Lol look at the lack of activity on this video. I don't know what to read in to it but it's odd to see a video that's been out for months on a channel with 30k subscribers to have less than 100 likes and 10 comments.
Because my fellow INTP’s are looking up how to deal with the issues. Meanwhile all the others are running or walking away from us in fear or boredom waiting for us to do anything
welcome to Intp reality, we just really don't care, and dating is for others apparently. are you kidding? dating? you mean like multiple dates in a month or year? doesn't happen over here maybe Chad intp, oh that's me, gets several dates a year. don't hold your breath
I think that most people searching for these videos are INTPs, not the people we wished were searching for them. And, as we know, we aren't going to just hand out "likes" as if they were free...
