7 Things Not To Say To Someone with Anxiety 

THIS IS WHAT MY MOM HAD A 3 HOURS LONG "CONVERSATION" (She yells and blame me for my anxiety and I shut up and stare at her) YESTERDAY, She compared my anxiety to fucking cancer just to point out that she's right. God please make her more empathic. Please.

" A: there are people who have it worse than you, you have no right to be sad B: There are also people who have it much better than you, so you have no right to be happy"

Big Leo this is precise

Big Leo IK people always says that with me!🙄

It doesn't matter people don't have to invalidate other's feelings

Omg yes.

Omg yes

Wow exactly

OMG yes

So relatable

If you have anxiety please tell me something, I have a friend who has anxiety and I'm worried about him. Is asking if he's OK quite often offensive? Yesterday he told me to stop asking and I can't tell if he hates it when I ask if he's OK. He also doesn't like talking about his problems so yeah I would appreciate if you answer

@@LegoCityFilms For me when someone asks if I'm ok sometimes it makes me feel like they actually care and sometimes it just makes me more anxious. I can't really tell you how it makes your friend feel but if he asked you to stop you might want stop or ask less often.

@@bluebookchair4301 ok thanks for replying

wooow my mom said that t me when i told her i have anxiety lmaooo

I agree!!! Why do people say these things? It is obvious that the other person is struggling so they need help. It’s like if someone was stuck in a deep hole. You would get a ladder or a rope and help the out. Same principle with anxiety and other mental issues.

Been there. I don't talk to my family anymore.

Who knows a it true😕

oh wow we have the same parent

That's a bad mom

@@northfox5368 She's not a bad mom it's just she'll say things to me out of tough love and we all say things we don't mean; it happens sometimes. We're human but it annoys me and makes me feel worse.

Agreed, literally anyone can stress and many people stress without even knowing it.

why i don’t like r/im14andthisisdeep

Been told this many times

Yeah, and this lead me to PTSD. And my mom never know this because my parents always think psychologist are way too expensive so they claimed me never had a chance to help myself.

@Tale Teller lol so relatable

Depression too actually.

Yup...loseing weight stres related is acting Btw i agree with you

I almost lost most of my friends because they're all feed up by me... I know it's not easy to have a friend like me, but I can't help myself from anxiety attack... That's why I became somewhat introvert... I can't afford losing any friend now... I feel sorry for them for having to know me😅

"stop crying" but they are screaming at you

“every student feels like that sometimes“ ...duh thank you mom

I hope you find someone that will understand you :")

@@cheeseycheezy thanks

Yes this is what my family said 😔

If you are selective with who you spend time with, you will find people who understand you, validate you and support you. A lot of people who don't understand never went through anything like what you went through or were told similar things when feeling upset and have no capacity or idea of how to be there for someone in an emotional way. But a lot of other people do- they just seem to be more rare because we are much likelier to associate with people who are representations of childhood figures and the people that either caused or severely heightened the anxiety we felt when it started to become a part of our lives. And it's not the difficulties in our life that hurt the most- it's going through it alone. If your friends don't understand you- or don't try to understand you- then know there is much better out there waiting for you. You're not alone, there are people who truly get it and people who truly want to understand, even if they've never experienced it themselves. The more authentically you can be yourself, the faster you will bring them into your life. I know that might be the hardest thing I could ever ask but being authentic about our experience with anxiety (or anything) even the tiniest amount can be extremely helpful- it's like putting out a call to people who are seeking someone like you

My sis said everyone will have anxiety is just that how high the anxiety level is😒

my own dad has told me this multiple times, i feel ya

And „I know how you feel.“

Really hate it when people say that. U fucking don't know what I'm going through

My teacher told me that

I hate the one that people said is: you choose to be like this

Who chooses the anxiety life

Maybe bts (jk)

I want Hobi to step on me I smell...Army

Nil space 😑🙄

@@unapple8374 its joke :/

That's a good idea. :)

yes please

that's a very very great idea. i hope they see this. ^^

They made one already

Yes please!

Oh my god my situation is same as yours

Yup. Same case. Times 3. I dont talk with them anymore

Same, but it is my father.

It’s really frustrating that some individuals think anxiety is an excuse and you’re just being lazy and effortless.” I’m so sorry you’re going through this situation :( I hope you are okay stranger and you get the help or support system you need :(.

Same

but cancer and anxiety are two different things. You can learn to control your anxiety, you can't control cancer though

​@@justanotherrandomperson180I don't think that's what they're saying. While I agree that cancer isn't the best choice for an example, they're trying to say that telling someone with anxiety to just stop caring is the same as telling someone with something out of their control to just stop affecting them. And for the record, you can't control anxiety. There are ways to make it better, or to stop it from affecting you as much, but you can't control it.

@@josephine8405 by "control" i meant there's things you can do when you're feeling anxious to help you calm down or reducing it/making it feel less miserable. I didn't mean you can stop it completely bc anxiety is a part of human nature, it can't go away forever

Oh my god I hate the "you're too young". I get that at work all the time, it's the dumbest thing.

Someone said to me, "your to young to have anxiety" and it really annoyed me and frustrated me.

No one is too young for anxiety. Mental illness does not discriminate .

"You're too young to be anxious" My therapist used to say the same thing to me and it didn't really help me get better at handling my panic attacks. My mother used violence on me to stop my attacks but obviously it made them worse No one is "too young" for anxiety

My roomate always says the word that makes my anxiety worse. And they also said "your too young to have anxiety" like it's really harmful and I can honestly choke then.

Stop staying back and tell them this is wrong

My fake friend is always saying I want attention and he's always pressuring me to speak (I have selective mutism) and I feel terrible

@@DontInterractWithMeBetween9-5. I would if I could but I can't :)

Roger Taylor's pair of maracas I feel you. Here's a hug.♥️

@@anagonzalez-mm4sz i was raged about all of them are saying same thing sorry i didnt mean that i usually erase all my comment in weeks also sorry if i offended you you, here some cake for the damage 🍰

How relatable 😭

I have had anxiety since I was 11 and back then my parents didn't take me seriously because I was "too young to have anxiety" and that "only teenagers and adults can have REAL anxiety". I don't think they understood how much it hurt me. They were only trying to be comforting but I wish they listened to what I was saying and didn't just push me away saying that I was "too young". It's been two years since then and now the people around me understand a little bit better. But I still don't feel comfortable to go to my parents when I'm having an anxiety or panic attack.

I’ve had anxiety since I was like 7 or 8 THAT JUST TRIGGERS ME also if they say “you’ll be fine” I automatically think of all the reasons why I wouldn’t be fine

That's really really bad to say To kiddos like me

😖

@Deepshikha Das I feel really bad, it's always like this and it just drains me whenever I think about it. To me it feels like the already bullshit 'education system' is much more important to parents than their childrens' mental wellness, as if we're worth nothing.

Ikr smh

I'm always sarcastic to cover up my anxiousness

ikr! that's the most *HELPFUL* thing anybody has ever said to me!

Yay sarcasm my cover up!

I love the sarcasm XD

Same here, my mom thinks saying these things helps 🤦🏻‍♀️

It's true though

@@xar91 Hi. I sincerely hope you never experience anxiety attacks. Anyway, after fighting anxiety for three years now, here's what I can tell you: 1. "It's all in your head" isn't exactly true. Anxiety is not a byproduct of mere imagination. It's a mental struggle; a manifestation that something isn't right with the way your brain is processing information. 2. "Nobody else can help you but yourself" isn't a definite truth as well. While making a deliberate decision to help yourself is the pivotal step to healing, someone suffering from anxiety requires more than himself to get better. Going to a professional is always strongly encouraged (just like how Psych2Go has always reminded us). Of course, reliable support systems are also as crucial as the first two mentioned. 3. "Just stop it. Don't think about it" cannot be true/applicable at all. It's like saying to someone with a cough, "Just stop it. Don't cough." Anyone who experiences anxiety attacks will tell you how much they want to avoid the episodes. That is why most of us stay away from the triggers, regardless how miserable it can be (imagine skipping a sentimental dinner with someone special just because you're afraid of people that surrounds you). I wish we could just stop it. Life could have been so much easier. Sadly, no matter how much we try to distract ourselves, it always finds its way back to our minds.

@@xar91 Again people who have no PHD,first Hand experience or anything speaking on subjects they know nothing about. There’s physical symptoms that come from it so I’d suggest doing some research on things first.

why do people blame everything on phones

ATS Gaming: I don’t know tbh, but that’s something my tells me overtime when my anxiety disorder is brought up

I need Sleep I want to rightfully slap the shit out of those people.

@@teraspeXt THAT'S WHAT I WANNNAA KNOWW

@@ginthemaid112 I've never related to smth so much-

Okay yeah that hit hard.

Sigh... this is why I rather stay at home. "If you want to get better I think should go out more" they say. Well sheet, no thanks if I'll end up bringing everyone down. Win.👏Win.👏

Oh yeah, I definitely relate to that. I always worry I'm bringing everyone down when I get in my "moods" because I've heard things like that too.

"Don't you realize you bring EVERYONE down?" Ik we're talking about anxiety but this is literally what my dad has told me about my OCD, that I ruin everyone's day and make everyone upset and I deserve to get yelled at.

@@j_iris You don't deserve to get yelled out for something you can't help. Ocd is that nobody can help, it's almost impossible to change behaviour without therapy.

How is that person a friend? My enemies treat me better than that.

@@MrCmon113 TOXIC friend is different. Toxic friends will go out of their way to make you feel as bad as possible. Enemies usually just don't like you.

Don't let those bitches treat you like that. They don't deserve you 💖😚

I had the teacher one so many times. ;-; and some of the others...

Ah, The fist 2 is me, And it always hurts me when they keep saying it over and over

I had all of them besides the crybaby or you just want attention one.

I hate doing work with a partner. It either I'm the one doing all the work or the other way around.

I’ve been told this so many times all of them especially “ You just want attention “ and “ Your being a crybaby “ and the teacher ones

Dexter Smith I don’t have anxiety and reading this made me feel bad, ( my point is: this is something that could hurt anyone and just saying this things to someone is not right). I’m really sorry that a lot of people gets hurt with such harmful words. And specially the ones that get the worse time dealing with it.

"It's better to be alone than in bad company"!

just reading this is giving me anxiety

I-I never expected this to get so many likes.... and I’m sorry if this comment upsets anyone. I didn’t mean this to trigger or to hurt anyone.

Dexter Smith you didn‘t hurt anyone ;) But I think you let several people (myself included) remember how they got hurt with one of these sentences. I rememberd that I could add a dozen more to your list. And THIS feeling, THIS memory sucks :( Not your comment :) And to be honest, I strongly believe your comment is helping a lot of people to confront their feelings! ,e for example. I‘m now in a position (because of external help) to challenge my problems. Now I have the strength to do so. But I keep coming back because I am so afraid and I still try to avoid any position I could get hurt and therefore I still am very lonely. So, actually your comment reminded me that I am much more capable than I tell myself I am! Great job 😄😋

Tilda Decerein I hate when they list things you already know. Like please stop your not helping your just making me feel frustrated and annoyed.

This is the summary of my mother

@@gio9789 lol 😀 relatable...

@@gio9789 It scares me how relatable your comment is

My boyfriend likes to say number 3 and number 7 to me all the time

So pretty much say nothing to someone with anxiety. Give me a fucking break

Hi

"Your arm wasn't broken yesterday so it can't be broken today" That's how stupid that sounds wtf

Evelynn Bowte people are so clueless and stupid...

You are not alone, we're in this together

omg ikr..my dad said "i miss the old you" to me and it makes me cry harder :(

Yes I totally agree with you this is also my story it's awful thinking of you sending you love and light and many blessings stay safe lovely 🤗🤗💐💐💐💐💐❤

Rachel Casey omg I hate this too - I would love to be the old, carefree me, but that’s impossible now. It feels worse to hear it from someone else

BlueeyedCat that’s so kind thank you so much i hope if you’re going through anything too you can overcome that. we’re in it together.❤️

I get told a similar thing, one time my friend said “if you keep quiet your whole life then you’ll never get anywhere”. In my head I just wanted to say “you think I don’t know that”.

y e a

Lmao my parents always say those.

I sigh

those seem like something someone who seeks alot of attention would say, like they are making the problem worse instead of being supportive

@@wut6251 sameeee

@Bacon Bandito It's also often used interchangeably with "a few".

The “You’re just doing it for attention” are usually from the smarties at my school.

@@siriusly6321 Well, these lines also come out of the mother of a child I deeply care about who has severe anxiety and depression. So it's not just the students at school who are a problem. There are so many people who have things against all of us who have mental illnesses. And it sucks because some children aren't getting the medical treatment they need, just like the example I have here.

ive never heard the "you're just doing it for attention" but its most likely what people will say if i ever show someone my arm :/

@@cherries.1143 Consider yourself lucky, I suppose. It's extremely demeaning for someone to go out of their way to invalidate your feelings and what you're going through. Remember that your feelings are valid because of your experiences, no matter what any other person may tell you. Honestly, that mother I mentioned in an earlier reply would say the same thing if I myself or her own daughter would show the fact that we've harmed ourselves.

That’s terrible advice anyway. It only makes you co2 levels spike which makes the anxiety worse. What is more important than breathing in, is breathing out. When I learned that it really helped me. Now I try to remember to breath in as normal as I can and focus on rather breathing out all the way so I empty my lungs fully. When I remember to do that I don’t get that tingly feeling on my lips and finger tips and it gives me something to focus on. I say that sometimes to people acting like they’re the expert on MY anxiety. It reminds them that the expert on my anxiety is me.

This perfectly describes what I'm feeling now.

That's how I feel but I still don't want to admit I have depression...

ohgawd, that's another comment I hate from people (not yours, yours is absolutely valid), the whole 'don't you want to go out somewhere? Aren't you lonely? Always by yourself?' Like... no. I feel FAR more lonely in a group full of people than I could ever feel when I'm alone.

I can’t describe how much this resonated with me. I haven’t been diagnosed with either, but I have been having a really hard time recently, especially in quarantine. Usually I’ll have my friends to distract me from what I’m thinking at school, but now I’m stuck with my thoughts constantly. My procrastination is out of hand, I’m in my last year of school and am so behind but can’t find it in myself to do anything about it. I also hate talking about how I feel, especially to my parents. My mum keeps telling me that it is something ‘deeper’ that is influencing my procrastination, but doesn’t think it’s anything as serious as depression or anxiety, but I’m honestly not sure anymore...and maybe she says that because she doesn’t really understand what either truly can be

Lol sorry for writing an entire book

man, why didn't I think to just not have a panic attack? "thank you that was helpful" i say right before passing out

I have both xD

@@MacaroniBalloni same..

Omg I love this comparison so much ☺

@@MacaroniBalloni *hands you a inhaler along with sound canceling headphones and just smiles*

I'm hollering at this comment!!!! So accurate

Buff Clash I'd say "Well *now* I am"

Everything is ego with a lot of people. Just "me, me, me, me!"

That's when you let them know you need some time and patience. It's not you, I'm just trying to take care of myself.

Yup

I'd be like no shit sherlock ugh

What about people telling you to "learn how to handle it" I have anxiety and someone said that to me.

@@dulciewatson6349 i hate that my family sucks at trying to help but..I know they doing it bc they love me lol

Someone said that to you!! I'm so sorry.😢hugs

Exactly like no shit sherlock now if you don't know any helpful tips I suggest you shove it back up your ass because if I wanted to hear shit coming from someone's mouth I'd start talking to my mirror.

I hate when people say things like that I'll be hyperventilating or having an anxiety attack and then you hear: Oh just take deep breaths you'll be fine stop overthinking things. They don't understand how hard it is to actually do that while hyperventilating and trying to gain some sense of control.

tbh i ask my anxious friends if i did anything because I’m anxious too :/

I hope u the best

...I'm sorry you have to go through that!

I get the "I think you're overreacting" all the time. I'm sorry you go through this ❤️

I get most of these and "you have everything I went through many things when i was little and I still did many things"

Omg. I'd want to murder somebody if they said something like that to me.

Guys who cry are no less strong than guys who don’t. Emotions aren’t exclusive to gender.

Everyone can cry and everyone deserves to be supported

Sadness isn’t a bad feeling. Don’t live up to what others think.

I hate hearing people make comments like that.Even tho I’m a girl,my heart goes out for you.It seems at times that society is harsher on guys that have mental illness

Fuck that in particular. Being a boy doesn’t make you alien and you feel things like everyone else would.

My dad tells me that all the time and uses his childhood fear of Thunder as an example 💀

@@Alisonsgachaverse I'm sorry that your dad does that to you I understand the feeling when someone says that but you can get through this with your anxiety and just don't let anxiety get the best of you I have both anxiety and social anxiety but just listen to calm and relaxing music and do whatever makes you happy while listening to music😊 you got this! I believe in you!

Was brought to my school counsellor today - she normally deals with ADHD students all that from what I’ve heard apparently I’ve got moderate-severe social anxiety and it’s gotten to the point I am beginning to avoid school. I’m always arriving late (usually 5-10min) When she counselled me this morning, she told me to tell my brain if I’m overthinking, to just say “I’ve got work to do!” So to basically like push the overthinking and anxiety to the side Normally I see the other counsellor (who works Thursday/Friday, but this one works Monday/Tuesday) Sent me to class half crying. It was overall already a while later, but... hell.. I can’t just tell myself “hey let’s stop overthinking, I’ve got work to do !!”

At least you get that my parents don't belive that I have anxiety everything I bring up they won't get me diagnosed and its getting harder and harder by the day. J have school. So I'm missing assignments. My mom won't get off my back. And I have to share a room with my little sister who is always yelling

Exactly

@@dyamondwomack549 my parents believe I have anexiety and the therapist and doctor confirmed it but they are like oh it’s nothing we all get scared and nervous all the time like bruh it’s not that simple and yea it’s hard to do school work when ur constantly scared of something bad happening

@@ppank277 I'm sorry about that

Yes hate it when said to me "Use your breathing exercises " Makes me want throw a spit ball on their face.

I had a nasty ex who told me that I’m just “playing the victim” and it was a very painful thing to hear from someone who I loved. I carried that thought and pain for months

People who crowd around you and tell you to “breathe” just make everything worse...

@@Kittihoney I'm really sorry that you went through that. I hope you find someone that treats you how you deserve to be treated. Sadly the person that treats me this way is my mother.

@GotchaGaming L. It may not make sense, but that's kind of what I prefer. A lot of people don't understand how to properly handle anxiety attacks, and often times it results with the person trying to help getting frustrated and my attack getting worse. I have talked to some of my closest friends about if I ever have an attack around them, to just give me some space, make sure people aren't crowding, and when I get calmed down enough, I'll ask for help. But it sometimes happens in different degrees of severity, so getting my attack to pass requires different methods. People have different ways of dealing with things, and my way may be difficult, but at least I'm trying to actively work on myself.

To the person who said that: you can't just get over it dumdum. Actually don't tell them please-

My school AEP teacher told me," its all in ur head, make urself busy with work. You r over thinking things bcuz u r idle" and all this when I went to her and just said I feel really sad and depressed. She didn't listen to the things I wanted to say...other than that everything listed above has been said to me but I especially quoted that bcuz it was coming from someone who was supposed to help.

Maybe hes doing bad like you but you cant understand him because you cant think but your anexity and stress others dont matter to you huh?

@@DontInterractWithMeBetween9-5. I don't know what you mean but of course I care about people with anxiety and many problems and I try to help people the best I can always! This person was my cousin, I was living with her and she hurt me pretty bad, and when I was having anxiety attacks or panic attacks she would leave me alone and critizise me because for her I was "overreacting" to everything, even to the most quiet noise in the house. If she told me she was facing some things I would've helped her the best way I could, with anxiety or not. Instead, she told me nothing and kept telling me these things.

@@suchitrabhattacharjee3283 that sucks! I hope you find the help you need and the best one!

As a parent, it's their job to help you. If she says shit like "don't put ME through this," then she should've swallowed. Going through this comment section, some parents don't get the point of being a parent

Sheep Tail I get that too :( I’m sorry. I hope they put more effort into understanding you and panic attacks are the worst agh. Keep going peeps

Sheep Tail I am sorry but if your parents say that, then they don’t deserve great kids like you

If it’s ok may I suggest you take your mum off your ‘safe’ list. This is a list of people you can discuss your anxiety triggers with. Sounds simple but having a safe an a unsafe list can help you manage your boundaries and keep you mentally well

Totally feel you!!!!

Stop being weak noone cares about your made up health issues

Agree!

I would like to know what to say to my friend so it can actually helps and not make it worse

That's an interesting topic! We will discuss this with the team :)

Love it!!!

yeah I honestly think that's better.

That person wasn't trying to help. 😂

That person was trying to hurt you . . .

I mean, I do have anxiety but I don't understand other people who also do. I have a few friends with anxiety and all of them say that they often cry or feel sad, whereas I don't. Seriously it's been months since the last time I cried. It's not that I'm happy all the time, it's more that I don't feel anything at all, for example when something that used to make me cry a lot happens. Is it weird? I'm very sorry for looking like an asshole by talking about me, sorry again

@@naturalLog26 It's fine, some forms of anxiety have symptoms of depression intertwined.

someone like that should never be considered a friend

Do you like Soup? First.......is that your real name if it is that’s amazing (I’m only joking) Second.....you’re such a good friend 😊

I wish I have friends like you

Bat... Soup?

Same

you’re a good friend

I Agree. Not sure why they see it as something bad.

@GotchaGaming L. At least they helped many people.

GotchaGaming L. well i don’t think that’s completely true a lot of these things even though the person saying them might have good intentions could hurt somebody with anxiety

@GotchaGaming L. Yeah, they at least helped many other people on other videos. They may lack a few things, but I believe it is extremely helpful

@GotchaGaming L. To be honest, I dont even know what they lack. Its just some people thinks they did a crappy job and all and lack the information they really needed and those stuffs. Basically. The videos may not be perfect, but it is extremely helpful for many other people, honestly.

So I can't speak for your girlfriend, but I can tell how I feel, as someone who has dealt with anxiety and depression my whole life, but I will try to relate to your situation. First off, realize that if her behavior is annoying or upsetting you, it's many times worse for the her. Remember, you can just leave the room or go to work and you don't have to directly deal with it for a bit. she can't escape it, and making her feel like it's bothering you likely only makes that so much worse. She has anxiety and possibly depression, she's not stupid. She knows it's not ok, she just can't help it, which is a lot of what feeds anxiety. Actions speak louder then words. For me, the little voice in my head that is usually just there to reminder me what is right and wrong, is telling me I am trash and worthless, etc. Even if she realizes those are lies, having someone constantly in your ear telling you you're garbage can be unbearable. So words are cheap and lies are easy. What works much better is actions, especially little things. If she feels isolated or alone, instead of trying to drag her to a better place, go to her and be there. A lot of the time I really don't want to talk about how I'm feeling. so when she's by herself, messing with her phone, sit down with her and pull your phone out too. You don't have to talk. Many people with anxiety feel like being that way makes them undesirable, use actions to show her that's not the case. When you do talk to her about it, watch your phrasing, anxiety means over thinking and over analyzing things. Instead of saying she's prettiest when she smiles, tell her you love her smile. Also, in a lot of cases writing notes or text messages work even better then spoke words, because they are something that can be taken out and looked at again. You could even try leaving notes in different places for her to find, like on her bathroom mirror for her to see in the morning. Ask her for her help. A big source of anxiety for me in a relationship is feeling like I am always taking and never giving. Again, people want to feel desired and needed. it can be something simple, just make it clear you want her there with you. Above all, realize that anxiety and depression are not something that just goes away, it's part of who she is. But along with those negative feels usually comes deep loyalty and empathy. So if you can show her love at her lows, she will likely return it 10 fold.

I was going to say the exact same thing ! I have experienced anticiptory anxiety multiple times since childhood, so hearing it from someone who knows me and current situation can really help me calm down. Something that also helps me ground myself is going back to the bare basics : "I am alive, healthy, I have a roof over a head, food, water, a loving family, and I can even afford my studies. So no matter what happens, everything IS going to be fine". And I agree that even if someone has not experienced anxiety themselves, they can still help by not being judgmental and listening. Talking about how you feel is so much easier when the other person makes you feel at ease.

@@olympe-rds yes, absolutely! With the intensity of the feelings a person with anxiety goes through, it can be very challenging to realize everything that IS going right for them that they can appreciate and find peace in. And even if "everything" is going wrong, there is always an up after a down, and it just simply needs to be heard in order to be acknowledged

"Everything will be allright" can be good but it has to be said the right way by the right person.

I mean you’re not wrong

I usually say: it feels really bad right now in this moment, but it will get better. It's going to be okay. You've gotten over hardships in the past, and you will be able to get through this this time too. I don't if it's the right thing to say necessarily to someone with anxiety, but my friend told me when I said that in the past, it had helped them get through a hard time in their life that I didn't know they had gone through till recently. They found out recently that they probably have anxiety.

No matter how much you have or if you have friends/ family with you it doesn't change the way you feel or what you struggle with. It isn't a sign of not being grateful either I hate hearing this sort of thing too, we can't control how we feel or the anxiety we experience not sure why people don't understand that.

SB Draws people without social anxiety don’t understand how it feels when you feel like you have all eyes on you... if that makes sense.

Just the feeling of everyone's eyes on you is panic inducing. I tend to freeze like a deer in headlights in those situations where I have to go up and talk in front of everyone. If I have a question I'm often too scared to try to ask and I suffer in silence as a result. Even if I somehow get through it, my heart races throughout it and after. Even if you convince yourself to not worry about what others think, you're body will react the complete opposite in that scenario and cause you to panic.

She doesn't know how you feel.

Alex The Raptor Exactly, we don’t choose the feel this way, we just...do

SB Draws EXACTLY! My mother doesn’t seem understand that it’s hard to do when that’s all your surrounded by.

Deep breathing does not work for me, I feel like I will run out of breath

Those are normal things said to me and the “Dissorder group” in my school

Does "did i do something wrong" actually annoy you guys, i don't have anxiety and i don't know what it's like, I'm trying to help someone who had it tho, i didn't say that sentence but i might, now i don't understand why it annoys because someone that says that means that they care and suspect themselves making a mistake, so why does it annoy, i don't get it, someone please explain

abood tube396 yeah im not sure why “deep breaths” and “did i do something wrong” are on this list. people are just trying to help. sheesh.

@@Joe-ou1iw Deep breaths can make a person with anxiety hyperventilate. And did I do something wrong will make the person feel bad because they think it's their fault you feel bad about it.

Little Tae it happens to me too , it's completely normal from what I can tell

I feel you man, i have panic disorder so I experience it on a daily basis, but I've been trying some meditation and having some peaceful time by myself lately and it helped me so much. The first time i had a panic attack i was surrounded by my friends and cus they don't know what's going on it just make some things more worse. So now whenever i had one I'll just ran off into somewhere quite and just keep on slowly breathing until it all stops.

That's human nature. When in an excited mental state, humans will tend to do exactly the opposite of whatever they're told. Police and especially "negotiators" and "public relations" train on this very point. I honestly don't know why more people aren't taught this. If you want an otherwise excitable crowd to turn into a mob, just tell them not to panic... and in record time, you will instigate a riot. SO in that particular manner, you're actually relatively normal. It might only be anecdotal, but I've never EVER seen someone told to "Calm down" who actually didn't get even worse than they started... It's the fastest way to get punched in the face when trying to stop someone with violent tendencies... AND may well be the single most useless phrase in all of the English language. ;o)

Same

same,

I know what's it's like and it does get worse but I didn't know I had social anxiety until I was eleven and I continued to force myself to do things which in the end would just drain me of energy and scare me so much. I hated everything. It started since I could walk and talk and I really wish my parents took me to a doctor instead of just assuming I was overly shy

Bacon Bandito What if I am ?what’s wrong with that?

Jiminie is a cutie it sucks really. Im even scared to work even though I really want to work ,I know I can’t face people

My mom and older sister said shit like that and it would never help. Social anxiety and being an introvert are two different things and people need to realize that.

Bacon Bandito yes I know what gay means but stop assuming my sexuality when u know nothing about me.if u don’t have anything to say related to my comment then just scroll away

'least your dad apologised. I have depression and possibly anxiety, and I was in my room and my dad said: "you can't have depression you're to young!" And he never apologised.

Oh... I kinda understand you. My mom said things like "you want attention", "you like to have a problem", "you don't try to solve your problems". But it is true that teenage make this things worse... Beeing a teen while having mental illness is hard...

my mom says the same thing a lot me while being in my room because I am having a panic attack mom: "why are you such a teenager?"

My dad does this shit all the time. edit:this was super long and turned into a vent so ignore the rest. If you're curious, tldr is I relate to the posts here, dad make panic worse and never apologises , I'm socially awkward and this idiot discovers they might have emotional trauma. Might delete this because I just complain for like a million pages and noone needs to hear that. edit 2: I shouldn't have written this, everyone has their own (most likely worse)problems and this probs just sounds like I want attention ... Today he said I should just grow up and get over it while I was already having a panic attack. One of my triggers is people yelling and/or getting mad at me for things I can't control or stop(yes it's because of him) so him saying things along the line of "quit it" or "grow up" or "that shouldn't bother you" were a lovely addition. At least my mom was there to correct him and explain that what he said just made it worse(I was almost out of the woods but then he had to open his mouth and I started having a worse attack reacting to my trigger). What's worse is he never apologises for the things he says or does even when corrected or told they hurt someone, he just moves on and never acknowledges he hurt me and made it worse. He always gets annoyed at the loudness of my panic and anxiety attacks (I sometimes have fits of uncontrollable screaming, expecially if I try to talk or if I get one that wakes me up while sleeping). Sometimes I can't talk for a while after a panic attack and I have to wither mime stuff out or write it down and ApParEntLY that's annoying too(to wait for me to finish writing or when my mom has to guess what I'm signing/mimeing. He constantly invalidates my anxiety, sleep disorder, depression and panic disorder and doesn't listen to me when I try to explain how it affects me or what's going on during an attack. And that's just if he shows interest in "helping" at all (he usually just leaves me on my own when I have an attack and thinks I should get over it myself w/out help and sometimes even tells my mom to leave me too, but bc she's a good person and parent she has never left me unless it's really important, like to take care of a pot on the stove or to get me something that might help me and she always asks if/ makes sure I'll be ok on my own for a bit: helps me to floor or sit down, makes sure I can breath properly,etc). He likes to make assumptions about what's bothering me or what should be done about it. My mom (who is super supportive) tries to explain based on conversations we have (I feel more comfortable talking to her because she actually listens to me, knows more about what helps/how it affects me bc she is usually taking care of me during an attack and talking to my dad is like talking to a brick wall so we have an agreement that she can speak on my behalf to my dad because I really don't want to) but he only half listens (rarely adjusts his behaviour) and ignores my contributions or specification on the points my mom brings up. He makes me feel unwanted and like my anxiety and panic/anxiety attacks are a burden on everyone else(especially my mom) Sorry I rambled the words just kept coming, I guess I needed to vent... Reading this over I think I have unresolved emotional childhood trauma regarding my dad which affects me more in the present. I'd talk to therapist about it but I have trouble waking up and I don't feel comfortable doing it in person (cause I'm afraid of getting covid even tho I'm double vaxxed)or over a video call(there's nowhere in my house where my family won't hear and there's stuff that is about them that id rather keep private (my mom would feel like she didn't do enough to help or that she could've prevented things from happening, my sibling would make fun of me and my dad is well... my dad). And for SoMe damn rEAsOn talking at a bunch of random strangers is somehow less difficult than reconnecting with my friends and telling them what's wrong. I'll probably delete this, I need to sleep.

@@insamitygacha2468 dude, it isn’t a competition. don’t phrase it like that

ATS Gaming exactly

"You're not thinking rationally " yeah maybe because I have a fucking mental illness that makes me be on the top of weird scary thoughts and many mixed emotions, don't you think mister rationally?

Oh boy I just hate when people think just because it's a mental illness you gonna get through it and be fine alone. Whenever this statement pops up I say : imagine if you broke your arm in a time that medicine couldn't understand so well how to treat, and what's going on inside your body. If you have money and conditions, maybe you'll go see a doctor, but the bone still takes quite some time to be fine again. Imagine feeling the pain, the suffering and all the bad stuff and having to hear: yeah but your father lost his leg on the war, and you haven't even went for one. You're pain is nothing compared to his you know that, you should stop being dramatic, it'll be fine soon, quite the winning, at least you still have your arm with you, starving homeless people are struggling more than you, you're just making this little thing a big deal. Mental illness are diseases, and pain it's not a fucking number to be compared.

If you ever need to talk, as someone with anxiety, I'm here for you.

Ali-Bee time that's horrible. I'm so sorry your mum is being so indifferent towards your anxiety. If she just did a google search, she'd find out for herself.

i hate going places alone so once i asked my mum to come somewhere and she told me "you need to grow up!" and i was like "anxiety mum" nd she told me anxiety is just me being immature

it just hurts

I’ve heard these before

........actually I have social anxiety so this is actually a bad thing to say for my situation 😂

@@angelacavon9256 yea same bro

@Bacon Bandito tell the part of our brain that is telling us that everyone will hate us and you'll do it all wrong, that. Thank you That's not everything that going through a mind of someone with social anxiety I just tried to think of something quick

@Bacon Bandito I'm seeing you in a lot of these comments saying some pretty rude stuff. You clearly don't understand anxiety so you should be makeing such bold statements.

foreveruseless HURRAY! *high fives!*

Relatable

BruhByers I KNOW RIGHT I start to feel super nauseous and my heart starts racing and I feel like I’m about to faint and sometimes I throw up, and IM BEING DRAMATIC like what 👁 👄 👁

Yeah,,,

Yeah

My mom: "Go ask that Walmart employee where the _____ are." Me: "But can't we just look for it using those signs up there?" Mom: "No, you gotta."

my parents don't understand. my mom has anxiety, but i get close to having panic attacks when it comes to order my own food. my parents say, "you're a big girl, you can order it yourself. we're not doing it for you." and i get so panicked that i just don't eat.

I wish my sister would be like that :( when we’re out in town she’ll pressure me to go into shops and buy stuff when I clearly explain to her I’m not comfortable doing that, then she’ll proceed to call me a coward and how my mum too thinks I’m unable to do anything. I’m turning 16 soon and I’m so fed up of hearing such unhelpful comments :/

Emma Grønborg dude, I know. I'm almost 15 and my 'dad' denied the fact I had signs of autism when Mum did a search online. People don't like change, so they pretend it never happened.

smiling doesn't mean anything but also that our soul is slowly dying...