As I move into middle age, I have noticed that I am treated differently when well dressed. While a breast cancer patient, I made a point of being "extra". I couldn't help looking pale, hair loss, etc. But I wore happy colors and statement earrings. People's positive response boosted my* mood.
Wishing you health always, yes it’s important more when older. I am not trend driven however can fit around it as I always wear well fitted clothes, never tight, good natural fabrics abd colours that suit. I have not had my hair cut since I left home to University a long time ago, always have it smooth back up and flattering. My style is ageless actually. I bought a beige wool melton blazer with gold buttons when I finished school before uni, beautiful, very expensive wth my savings, black exquisite one from The Cupboard in NZ in 1986I and currently have a camel hair version now, no gold buttons and beige camel hair version with leather buttons. I could have worn all at any time in my life. Not the python skin coat though I made that went with the 60s mini skirts.
My mother always suggested a full length mirror in the hall to see what the world will see before you step through the door, and when you step back into the house and take your shoes off, you clean them apply comforters to them and store them properly, hang and brush clothes.
Yes..please look at your rear view before going out. Shocked that some women wear clothes that are too ill fitting,tight, look awful as they walk away.
@@edennis8578 lol 😂 shoe trees to keep the shape and reduce creases, that or screwed up newspaper or tissue paper, checking the heels and using a good quality leather conditioner. Getting them mended when necessary.
When I am "not feeling it", I make sure I dress really well that day with something i love and pay particular attention to the details of makeup, jewelry, accessories, shoes. It helps as a pick me up.
I was brought up to dress well. It makes me feel better to present myself to the world in my best manner. Too many people are way too casual. It is disrespectful in my opinion. Thanks for this Gemma💕💕
Thank you! "Presenting yourself to the world" is a concept that so many people don't think about. I've seen comments like "nobody cares how you look," "my clothes are how I express myself" (while looking totally mental), "I'm so glad that people no longer judge by appearance" (what planet are they on?). If more people stopped to think about what they're telling the world about themselves by their appearance, they would be a lot happier.
I think that it depends; "dressing well " doesn't mean "dressing like what's socially considered trendy/acceptable " ; equating the two is how people end up following every fashion fads, one after the other; even though a lot of people look horrible in "trendy " clothing that are extremely unflattering on them. The truth stands in the middle.
I totally agree! I have always tried to dress well (for my current mood) and worn a full face of makeup (again, for my mood) every day. I work from home and still do this. I did so during lock-down when my teenage boys and husband were the only ones to see all day, day in and day out. It wasn't for them, it is for ME! I dress and make myself up in the way that I want too. I definitely feel better when I think I look better! I love your videos because they always feature classic styles! I wouldn't complain if you posted more! 😉
EVERYTHING you said is absolutely true! One example: a woman who worked on the 'Dallas' show (years ago), borrowed some of the clothing and went home for a holiday on a plane. She had reserved coach class, but the stewardess took one look at her and moved her into first class! YES, dressing well affects EVERY part of your life and of those around you. Dress well: YOU DESERVE IT!!!!
So true! I used to work as an English teacher overseas when I was in my 20s. My older, usually male colleagues believed we should all dress down in order to not seem superior to the students. The problem was that I got no respect - the students didn't listen and it was hard to get the class started. When I decided to do the opposite "dress superior" lol, wearing smart skirts, blazers and professional attire, the students paid attention immediately. I save about 15 minutes of class time when I started doing this. The older male colleagues were oblivioous to the fact that most respectable people dress well overseas not sloppily. I suppose they had good intentions lol, but for all their experience overseas, they didn't understand that the cultural norms were different.
Gemma, I loved this video! I agree 1000% with the content. Many years ago, my former boss gave me the advice that “if we dress professionally, we think professionally.” This has stayed with me - not only on a professional level but in my personal life as well. Nowadays, I still try to dress well, clean, coiffed appearance with manicured nails and good shoes. Lol. If we don’t invest in ourselves, why should anyone else? ❤
Thank you for this. I've been going through a lot of very difficult things recently and felt embarrassed and shallow for still wanting to look nice and keep my wardrobe updated. I've realised that wearing a basic 'survival' outfit all winter where I rotated waterproof trousers with a big jumper was contributing to me feeling more depressed. When I dress better I feel better and it gives me a more positive outlook. My grandmother and auntie didn't have much money but they always looked extremely elegant and stylish. No matter how poor they were they always looked smart and well put together. That then tends to lead to better work opportunities and being treated with more respect. I'm looking for a few nice knitwear items this winter to help keep me out of my usual rather depressing winter uniform.
I don't remember a time that I dressed well and it made my mood worst. Dressing well ALWAYS uplifted my mood with no exceptions. It made me feel put together hence acting out in a put together way. It also shows respect for the people I am meeting that I care enough to look presentable to them. The world isn't suppose to be your living room. Your living room is only your living room to be comfortable in.
This is so true for men too ! My husband wore a required work uniform in a dull brown or tan but then when wearing " dress " jeans or khakis w/ a nice oxford shirt on days off , he " stood taller " ! Also , a sport coat & tie outfit or a tux for a yearly holiday charity really boosted his physical & mental mood !! ( Note - no matter what he wore , he was always friendly , outgoing , but dressing well made his personality shine ! ) 🥰
You are so right! On my way back from a formal meeting in full makeup, heels, shift dress, jacket ..... Stopped at M&S to grab something for dinner. As I reached my car, a gentleman appeared from nowhere to ask if I would like some help to put my heavy shopping in the boot. Then, at the petrol station, another gentleman offered to help me with my petrol so I didn't get dirt on my "pretty outfit". Aside from that, I will often see a lady shopping in M&S food or Waitrose who looks great ..... I will stop her and tell her how lovely she looks. It was wonderful to see a complete strangers face light up!
Wow Gemma, you really hit the nail on this one❤❤ Self care!! That special attitude that you matter. Your self respect tells the world,how they should treat you. Versions of your best self,lead to best days. Amazing advice Gemma on all aspects 😍😍
This is certainly a video which gives fantastic advice. Taking care of your appearance indicates pride and respect for yourself which we all need to do. Thank you for sharing 🙂
Thank you so much for this. It really does help and I've always believed that, but since lockdown it's been harder. People do approach you more readily even if it's to give you a compliment on what you're wearing , and this is because you are signalling to them that you're a worthwhile person to know. It's about self-worth. There is a huge amount of self consciousness right now about image and a backlash against being well dressed which I find bewildering. People say you're trying to look wealthy, whereas in fact you're just trying to be the best version of yourself because of the obvious benefits including mental health.
To "put your best foot forward" was a requirement in our Dublin household. My sisters and I wouldn't dream of leaving the house looking sloppy or unkempt, because it would reflect badly on our parents, and ourselves. It was a habit well learned and never forgotten, and it is remarked on almost daily, so I know my mother is smiling, wherever she is ❤
That video is so true, thank you. Since dressing well I have taken more care of myself in what I eat, my posture has improved, my skin has improved and most importantly my worth to others and myself has improved. So dressing well has a huge positive impact on my life.
I went through decades of feeling awful about myself and wanting to disappear in public. But I finally went on a self-care journey to become as fit as possible to maintain independence through my advancing years (I am 62). I had no sense of how I would represent myself after living in black swing tops. I began to watch several channels on how to dress - to determine what spoke to me. Your channel stood out and really resonated with the inner 'me.' I don't have much money, so I finally began to shop at thrift stores. I am amazed at the high quality treasures to be found, cashmeres, silks, wools, linen, lined trousers - most still with original tags. I began to dress thoughtfully even to run errands. The posture aspect you mention is very real, I stopped slouching. I feel confident and want to go out and interact with the world instead of hiding myself away and missing out on so many opportunities. I really enjoy your channel and it's made a big difference in my life.
Gemma, your hair looks so good, healthy. I really like the v- neck on you also. Thanks for the video, I agree with everything you've said. After the covid lock-downs I've been dressing so much better, planning my outfits and accessories, and it's noticeable, I've been receiving compliments and it feels great.
Hair, nails and skin are big ones for grooming. If you wear them everyday you are worth it to keep them maintained. Teeth are essential and if you don't have a good smile you will be affected emotionally.
Great video, Gemma! "When you look good you feel good and when you feel good you look great"!! (This is a quote I've always remembered from a Miss Clairol commercial when I was a child)
When I look good, I feel even better. 😊 Clothing can be a positive projection of self when you can’t meet and speak w/someone. Carriage does improve when nicely dressed. Wearing attractive, quality wardrobe is comfortable. That comfort is not limited to wearing T-shirt and jeans type outfits-which can also be elevated. Perception. 😇 Thank you, Jemma, for reminding us the connection between wardrobe and personal characteristics.
It is not only respect for yourself but showing respect for those you are with by dressing well . complimenting others on how they look is just being a considerate human being
Great sound advice, dear Gemma. I completely agree. An elegant lady is not only well dressed as it's also a matter of carrying herself with graceful attitude and respect towards others. Loved this video and you look stunning as always. Thank you 🙏
❤love the empowerment to become better dressed men and women. COVID-19 sort of put us all in a too relaxed dress mode. Back in the day, we called it dress for success
COVID-19 accelerated the decline but I clearly remember that my we stopped going out for dinner because my husband couldn't stand looking at the dirty flip-flopped feet and beer bellies peeking out underneath stained and ripped T-shirts.
During lock down, I dressed up in an outfit everyday including a little make up, hair, and jewelry. I realized that dressing up made me feel better. Staying in pj like attire makes me think of being sick all day- yuck!
"only a shallow, silly people would waste so much energy into their look" " I don't care what people think of me. I dress for myself, not for others". Those brave words were uttered by a newly arrived american girl here in Tokyo when she observed how the locals always make an effort to dress up whenever they're out in public ( even if it's just for a grocery shopping at a neighbourhood's konbini ). Of course she soon find out that she really sticks out like a sore thumb among the locals, and the locals tend to avoid interacting with her.
I’ve always dressed well in classic tailoring. The funniest comment I ever received was from an acquaintance the same age as me who always dressed like a schlumpadinka. In the most reproachful tone she said: “People respect you and treat you better because you dress well.” Uh, yes. And do you draw any conclusions?
Thank you for your videos! You remind us that packaging/branding matters. I’ve often been told that ~90% of communication is nonverbal, so one’s appearance and presentation are very important in communicating to the world who we are. Clothes, hair, makeup: all are visual media for communication! Side note: This video made me smile because the sweater you are wearing (navy with horizontal stripes) is very much my style. I have several tops (sweaters, long-sleeved tee, short-sleeved tee) that are all variations on that navy-with-stripes pattern. Apparently I subconsciously made that part of my branding, so to speak.
This is all true and relevant . I seldom put an extra effort into dressing well but past positive complimentary comments by strangers make me smile when I remember them . I'm in the process of ridding myself of my worst towels which I use daily - bought new ones yesterday . We easily slip into a rut before we take notice I think .
These were great reminders, Gemma to looking fabulous. I am becoming so much more aware of the styles that truly suit me. It is true that it helps me shop more intentionally. Thanks for another wonderful video.
As I have aged (I’m 72 but cute with it !), my dress code is dictated by Audrey Hepburn. Simple, clean lines, elegant. If Audrey wouldn’t have worn it, nor would I to this day.
This video..... is perfectly said and presented. I really needed to hear this today. As a matter of fact, I am saving to watch again and again. Thank you!
I have been consistently dressing well since childhood. My mom always dressed well if on a budget (she came of age in post WWII France) and I thought she was beautiful and commanded respect. I wanted to be like her. In high school, I would humor the freshmen when they mistook me for a teacher. I was happy when a classmate called me "classy". The rest of the time as a teenager who did not fit the mold was more difficult, but I learned to be less sensitive to what others thought of me. I built a small circle of true friends. In my adult life, dressing well has served me well, in all the ways described in the video.
My mom always said if you’re feeling unhappy or stressed, fix your hair, makeup, and put on your favorite outfit. It works. It’s hard to feel bad when you look your best. On the other hand, it’s also hard to feel great when you look a mess.
Gemma, this is a lovely length for your hair. I've heard the saying how you present yourself is your calling card. And dress for the position you want in life.
I live on the Gold Coast. Even though the lifestyle here is relaxed and casual I always make an effort to dress well. I notice that women here dress very slovenly. There are beautiful clothes in the stores and yet most wear flip flops, ripped jeans or flayed shorts and black or dark navy. Hardly any women here wear pretty colourful or classic skirts and dresses. Because of such a sloppy approach to dressing, it doesn't take a lot of effort to stand out. When I do make the effort, I feel proud of myself!
In high school I was voted ‘best dressed’. I made all my clothes myself. I also wore nice shoes. In college I wore skirts and dresses and when one evening I walked into the dining hall in a pair of jeans the hall went quiet. I like being anonymous so I had no idea anyone gave me notice. I’m now 74. I still dress well, not expensive, but classic styles. I put on a little makeup, less is more, and still nice shoes. I do it for myself. Not trying to impress or act like a snob. I just feel better. It’s funny though, I get treated better when I make an effort. My Mother always wore a dress and never stepped out without her lipstick on.
I have started to keep a good posture no matter I am wearing. Someimes I have to go shopping in my garden gear or gym pants because I have no time to change outfits. It might start raining and I need to buy the pots or this summer I have emptied my dad's apartment after he moved to a nursing home. If I have time to get ready, I want my outfit to fit well. It does not have to be trendy.
Love your hair......I must live in a different world. I always dressed nice and was always picked on for doing so which in turn really hurt my self esteem. I no longer have the need to dress nice so I don’t and I don’t get picked on.
Then they win and you are now unhappy in clothes you don’t like . Please put a pretty dress on for work tomorrow. Or to do your shopping. The right people will appreciate your effort . You are not dressing for those that don’t x
Dress up! Don't let those malicious persons get you down. And remember to always laugh in their faces whenever they make any narcissistic comments....absolutely show them who is superior...they will quickly stop when they get afraid of being taken for fools by the others around them. Usually these narcissistic people say these nasty things when there is an audience around. Say something like " Oh I've got so much stuff in my wardrobe I have to put it on sooner or later"... did you get the double wham? Firstly you can do exactly what you want to do and secondly you're full of cash to have all that stuff. Remember ....malicious people are the most frightened people.
Hello Gemma, I noticed that your videos are totally different made compared to one or two years ago. Even if I haven't heard why you changed your style ( maybe you wanted to appear more ... youthful?) Never mind! I like them. But I did like them before too. Classic videos without too much "humor" were in my opinion also good enough.
Something which always amused me, I visited a friend and two male friends of her s were there. I was working packing etc for my friend, when I left I put on my chocolate brown cashmere blazer I had made, the two males leapt to attention. I thought they were pathetic as they knew I was out of their league all along but only gave respect when I wore that. However this shows exactly how it works from 5 minutes to the next and this video is correct. I have a jcrew statement multi strand set of pearls which when I wear them gets me smiles a spoken to when walking up the street. It can also trigger jealousy being groomed and presented even in a non competitive way, cashmere black slightly oversized black crew neck sweater, black neat jeans vivobarefoot low boots…..hair smooth and white and up at the back…small Pearl earrings, amber brooch…real estate agent with 1,700$ Gucci loafers was jealous. Had lots of that.
I understand where you're going with this but I think this greatly depends on your area and your personal goals. My goals are typically the opposite from this here as being well-dressed would have the opposite effect here for me locally than what you're discussing. I greatly prefer to dress to fit in in your environment, even if that means dressing down; dressing well puts a target on you for negative attention and even on occasion bullying in my area. You'll get more backhanded compliments from all classes more than anything. The general populace here doesn't care for you to look like you don't belong, even wearing slacks instead of jeans you will stand out like a sore thumb. And having more people come up and speak to you or remember you often is horrible personally; I have very little social energy, if its used speaking to a stranger then I can't socialize with friends later in the week or go to a work event because my social energy has already been squandered on strangers and the regular work week. That being said, choosing to care for your body and show confidence can be done in many ways; dressing well is one of many. If dressing well doesn't work well for you or your environment, thats okay. It's perfectly fine to find your own way to express confidence outside of this.
I get you. Dressing in a certain way is an instrument, which you might or might not want to use depending on your goals. It's not a "requirement" in order to be a decent human (as some of these comments say).
In some areas being too well dressed would mark you as a tourist and make you a target for thieves. Sometimes it’s better to blend in. What’s important is always being clean and neat, that shows you have self respect.
I find it odd that with the increasing number of people living in overcrowded cities we still need to debate whether or not dressing well is essential. Sharing public transport with someone who worked in catering all day long and neither showered nor changed their uniform may convince you otherwise.
I see my body a blank canvas. It is not perfect but I maintain good weight and shape. I use my body to express my aesthetics and creative side. If 50% population would be proud and creative in dressing their body, the world would be a great place full of diverse beauty, like seeing beautiful buildings and urban design.
I disagree. The problem is that too many people view their body as an artistic canvas without stopping to consider what message they're sending out. Too often it's "I'm crazy" - and not in a good way. More than once I've backed down the aisle in the supermarket because some young woman with a row of safety pins through her eyebrows or giant tattoos all over her was walking my way.
The only place I don’t make an effort is the gym . I understand why people do but I am very confident in myself . My gym is a home from home and I never want anybody to hit on me in there . I don’t want to have to dodge anyone . That’s not to say people who make an effort in there do it for attention.