a playlist to cry to about my daddy issues 

Timestamps :3 0:00 i love you - Billie Eilish 4:53 i can't breathe - Bea Miller 8:29 Liability - Lorde 11:17 Six Feet Under - Billie Eilish 14:31 like that - Bea Miller 17:40 tolerate it - Taylor Swift 21:50 idontwannabeyouanymore - Billie Eilish 25:32 Playing God - Paramore 28:35 God Knows I Tried - Lana Del Rey 33:15 What Kind Of Man - Florence + The Machine

People with trauma because their dad left 🤝 People with trauma because their dad didn't leave

It’s funny how “daddy issues” is used as an insult towards girls when it’s the mans fault for failing as a parent

My face when i see ppl with a good relationship with their father is another story :*)

realizing your dad will never change at all and you’re just destroying yourself by hoping he will is one of the worst things to ever experience

I think he doesn't even deserve to know his baby girl is crying until her nose is all stuffy while he's sound asleep. ☺️

every child deserves a parent but not every parent deserves a child

The man I’ve cried the most over will always be my dad

I really wish I was a Kid again...Not because been a teen suck at all, I have fun, friends, goals...But I miss having my dad’s love.

every time my mother mentions that I look like him it hurts me she hates him :)

It hurts, when he thinks that parental support means giving money, and car rides when you need it. But everytime he is around you, you have to feel scared of messing up something which will make him hate you. Then him telling you how much you are a piece of ...it and you never do anything right. And you are waiting for the opportunity to move out and finally be able to live as a human, and not his emotional toy which he destroys more and more, day by day.

I hate him because I love him, even after all he's done, he's literally broke me

I suffer from anger issues... And so does my father and everyday I swear I am more like him and it hurts I can feel myself breaking and it won't stop sometimes I wonder if I am myself.

It’s honestly so confusing at this point. I don’t know if I love or hate him anymore, he’s hurt this family so so much, especially my mom. I know she’s scared of leaving him but I just want her to be happy. My dad switches up on me and my siblings all the time and it hurts every time he takes his anger out on us. Then he will act like nothing happened the next day trying to be nice. I hate this. I hate it when my parents argue it gets so damn serious. I wanna run away from home, just not ready to leave my mom alone in the arguement. Thanks for reading my rant.

Is it normal that my biggest fear is when my dad comes home? There really are times where I just want him to never come back, everything would be better...

Dad, i want to cry with you about my problems, instead of crying for you about your problems

“ i will change i promise “ changes for the worst. Lies on his child to make him look better. doesn’t care. makes his kids cry. why? why?

my dad was my everything, my idol. now he is the reason i cry myself to sleep.

Anybody else's father been absent for most of your lives and now wanna be involved after you went through so many things without him?

I’m only 2 minutes in and my face is covered with tears.

He's a great father for a moment and then becomes the devil the next. Although I never got hit but the things he says...OH GOD they are so hurtful and suffocating

When your dad manipulates you, emotionally abuses you, lies to you, belittles you, refuses to listen to you, and then gets mad at you and tells you that you need to sort out your relationship with him with a therapist😍😍

Why should we be so hurt? I really wanna be a strong woman who doesn't need a man But.. how?

My dad has never yelled at me or hit me. But he made me fear him, he made me anxious just seeing his name on my phone calling. I was scared of disobeying him, I was scared of asking him for stuff. He emotionally abuses me, yet I couldn't see it because it was so subtle. His imprint on my mind is so strong that sometimes I defend his actions towards me to myself. When I was younger he would take me to arcades and movie theaters and amusement parks. But he hasn't done that in awhile. Instead he tells me that I need straight As and makes me feel like a failure, a disappointment, and not good enough. But slowly, I'm learning, that I don't need his approval. I'm slowly learning because I have friends and ppl I hold closely to help me. The old dad I cling onto isn't going to come back, he caused too much damage, he makes me think everything is my fault. One day...one day I'll express to him the pain that he's caused me. Make him see how much in pain I am because of him.

Whenever someone talks about their nice dad, or whenever I come across a social media post of someone talking about their loving dad i tear up immediately. Why dad, why did we have to be here? I know you could’ve done your role better. Doesn’t it hurt to know that your own children are wondering if the blame was on them to be living like this?

“He was supposed to be the first male love of your life you still search for him everywhere” that hit hard

my dad is emotionaless and never said “i’m proud of you” or “you look beautiful/great”. i inherited almost everything from him, anger, looks, syndromes... him and i have rls (where you can’t control your legs and you can’t sleep) and he had the audacity to tell me “stop shaking your legs”. HE HAS IT TOO AND HE CANT CONTROL IT, NEITHER CAN I. AND OH ANDDD, when i was crying all day (one day) my dad never did once tell me it’s okay. he never told me “that boy doesn’t deserve you”. i wanna be special to him, i just wanna be daddy’s little girl. my dad doesn’t even support my religion.

i wish my dad realizes how much he's hurting my mom, cuz i'm the only one who's actively trying to make him see how much it's affecting our family. everyone's just letting it happen, and it's just so wrong. i'm seen as the black sheep since i keep voicing out what's wrong, still tho it doesnt do anything but paint me as a disrespectful daughter.

none of us should be going through this

hands up whose father is probably bipolar but won't reach out for help or medication so he ignores you for 4 months straight and then is the best dad on the whole world for a few weeks and it repeats. and every time he ignores you, you tell yourself you dont need him, but when he says he is sorry and he will look for help you trust him but he breaks you heart over and over again. just me ? - oh

i wish i was a little girl again , maybe he will love me again. Am i not worth anything dad? Why does he love my niece and older sister more than me? Why? Why? all i wish is a hug from him telling me evrything will fine and that i should'nt worry about nothing. I see myself flinching because im scared he wouldhit me or yell at me any minute. Dad you're losing me by every second. All i ever wanted was your love and affection. I wish you would tell me you love me and not leave me hanging . Have i never been one of ur favorites? Is it becase i can never do anything right? pls just give me answer..

i really want to forgive my dad but everytime i hear a word from him he gives me a reason not to. im not only sad or disappointed i am also very angry. he doesnt even put the effort to try getting our relationship to be better again and i am so tired of pushing it forward. i wish it wasnt truth but i hate him so much. im truly scared of becoming someone like him i try so hard but everyone tells me otherwise, it just makes me feel worse. i dont wanna become the person i hate the most, the one who hurt me the most. help. im sorry for the long vent

god, he’s acting like the victim and everyone’s falling for it. he only felt bad when people found out.

Me: yeah guys I'm totally fine Also me:

The role of a father isn’t for given out It's earned

Dear dad Why don’t you treat me like a real daughter I need attention from you i DESPERATELY need a hug I want to cry in ur arms and yell at u telling you how much u hurt me when u tell me to go cook bc I’m grown enough..I’m only 15 dad when u drag me from my hair telling me I’m worthless and to listen and call me fat body shame me it hurts me please stop it I’m trying my best sometimes I want to stay in my room but u don’t understand u grab me and force me to spend time with u outside but u yell at me when we’re “spending time” Haven’t heard u say “I love you” ever.. why? I get ur anger issues get the best out of you but please don’t get ur anger out on me I slowly realize I’m becoming u I start to go crazy when I’m mad god please take my pain away it hurts me so much I want to grab a bottle of pills and overdose but I can’t bc I’m too scared I tried once and I felt my stomach going crazy..when u call me fat I try to starve myself but I’m a bad daughter I’m sorry for being a bad daughter dad I love you I won’t stay long I love you. Sincerely your daughter- Bridget.

it sucks because I have to correct myself when I say "my parents" to "my parent" or "my mum" because I only have one, the role of a father isn't just given out, it's earnt. It was earnt more by my male teachers than my biological father, great job Tim.

who eles cryed that mutch that now cna cry without making a sound ⬇

i wish my dad was more open about his emotions. it gets harder and harder to want to fix our relationship, he gets angry at the smallest things and takes it out on the person closest to him. which always ends up being me. i miss when things we're much easier, when i was daddy's little girl. according to him: so happy and calm.

im crying knowing that so many people are suffering with so much issues bc of their fathers. we don’t deserve to feel this, we never deserve to be anxious just bc he’s around near us. we do NOT deserve any trust issue, anger issue, anxiety bc our parents. this whole thing sucks. fr

All I want and "proud of you" or a "well done"

I’ve only ever wanted a father. I wished that the dad I did have would be as perfect as the ones I saw with my friends or on tv. I wanted that perfect family dynamic. I just want a good family, ya know?

the 2 people who disliked don't have daddy issues.

when my mom told me that im just like him idk if im glad or hurt, bcoz she mean only the bad side she saw about him, as middle child my mom not very fond of me. If smth goes wrong im the first person she saw to vent her anger haha if the train wreck pls dont pull me out

i hate fighting with my dad. i don’t even mean to start an argument like it just happens. i try to talk to my dad about my feelings but it always turns into a big heated argument. we just can’t seem to put our differences aside. i have my way and he has his way. and i feel like we’re both struggling to make each other understand our differences. all i really want is to have a health relationship with him but honestly at this point it just seems so impossible. i mean we have our days where we get along fine and then all of a sudden a normal conversation turns into an argument and it all starts to hit again. i wonder how long this would go on for. i feel like i’ve become a burden in his life. i think that maybe if i just disappear, his life would be so much better and more calm. he thinks he understands me because he raised me but he genuinely doesn’t, but i don’t understand what he’s thinking either. it’s so frustrating. i just wish we could both understand eachother as opposed to arguing with eachother.

My biggest fear is that I will see my dad leaving without having told me not even once "I'm proud of you".

It's father's Day today and i locked myself up in my room crying the whole day. I fucking hate him so much

My parents separated when I'm just 3 years old and they both have a family on their own now , I'm on my mom's side but it's really hard because I feel like I'm stuck in the middle , a mistake they made from the past . I don't know why i still feel like this even everything is good and their partners are good to them. Especially my step dad treats me like his own .

I wish my dad would say "I love you" to me because he never does but says it all the time to my sister. I wish he could be here for me when I need him but he is always nowhere to be found. I wish he would accept me as trans but yet never does. I wish he didn't push me aside my entire childhood and ignore me. I wish you weren't such an asshole dad I wish you could care for me like the rest of your kids I wish I could say I don't need you and mean it :/

My father made a wound in my heart that gets re-opened every time a man, family, friends, any person I love really, proves I cant trust them. Every time someone tells me I'm worthless or treats me badly I think of him and cry. He was the first person to make me feel like I'm nothing. The first person to make me second guess myself. The first person to break my heart. He taught me I was only worthy of love conditionally and if I was in service of him. He taught me to accept abuse. He taught me to hate my body. To be silent when in pain. I just want to feel ok in my skin and feel loved.

I just can’t handle the weird ups and downs anymore.

My dad.. He’s the one who decided and made the choice to fucking have me only to treat me like shit. He’s never hugged me. He’s never said “I love you.” He’s never taught me anything. I raised my self. Im glad im independent. I’ve learned so much. I know myself more than anything. They are the reason why i’m in a place like this. He’s thought that I was faking having anger issues depression anxiety ADHD PTSD. They thought school was a good place. Boys are one of the reasons why I have PTSD. He never cared. He’s never cared about me.

i wish i could forgive him but he hasn't even said sorry or acknowledge what hes done to me. he tells everyone its all my fault and everything I say is a lie. its been over a year and i wish i could just forget about him but its hard because hes my dad and i loved him. all i wanted my whole life was for him to love me and see me for who i was. all he did was make me the bad guy and told me i looked exactly like my mom and projected his anger he had for her towards me. now he has his own family. they go to fancy restaurants, amusement parks, parties and hes forgotten about me and my brother. i dont understand why he would treat us like this when we have done nothing now all this trauma is stuck with us.

My dad breaks me almost everyday, by yelling, guilt tripping, getting frustrated, telling me I should do better. In my family, when he breaks someone, it means that he makes them cry, sob, whether It's silent or not, alone or with him seeing. We've been trying to fix our relationship, but it doesn't feel like anything has changed :(

I will never ever let my kids go though the same shit my dad has put me through

My dad spit on my face while he held a pizza cutter close to it and twisted my arm because I asked "Dad, can you please give me the slice that doesn't have a olive on it?". I'm autistic and olives are one of the foods I fear the most, he said he got mad at me because I was ignorant and ordered him to remove it from my slice, I wasn't and didn't do any of those things.

This was recommended to me by RU-vid....I feel called out... But seriously this is an awesome playlist 😌

my dad has depression, but is so ashamed of seeking help he drinks and cheats. flat out turns me into his therapist instead of apologizing. it's hurt me and my mom so much and my mom tries so hard. it's not my fault but i feel like such a burden because he never listens or apologizes properly. i feel like a babysitter and not his child.

Just the quote made me teary don’t play with my issues like this 😭❤️

my biological dad left, my step-dad died. im never going to have a father figure in my life.

I’ve had horrible mommy issues my whole life I always denied the fact that i could also have daddy issues only to realize I have been very Deprived of my dad for a long time of my life and I feel so sad knowing I haven’t seen my dad in three/4 years due to moving and my parents are divorced btw and he had a new child and all and remarried he still calls me and misses me but I just want my old life back just a small taste of bittersweet nostalgia

Life sucks sometimes :)

thank you for this playlist and the comments that come with it

I believe i’m incapable of feeling or understanding love from the fact that my father never made me feel loved

are you tired? of your dad calling you names and deeming you "useless" ? and every time he does something nice it breaks your heart knowing that it won't last? every time he says "i love you" to your sibling but not you thinking he's addressing it to the room and you just don't say it back because it doesn't feel okay and you get choked up with tears? and you pity him because deep down you still love him, you pity him because of the habits he's fallen into? when don't show him anything new you did because you know he's gonna pick out imperfections in it? when he hits you and breaks your things because he can't control his anger and he gets angry at stupid things? me too :,) take care of yourself.

I had "the perfect father" until it took me years to process that he was an abusive demon: who emotionally and physically abused my mom and sister. I was 10-11 years old when he started screaming at me and one day he had an "'abuse episode" in which he hit me multiple times (my memories are really shabby). My mom saw that as the last straw and got us out of that house. I don't remember any of the moments i spent with him where i was obliviously happy they're all fragments my mind has pieced together. My father never made me feel like a piece of crap (excluding the few times he body-shamed me) but i never had a normal family. Even memories i have from when i was 3 were my mother bleeding from her forehead, sounds of breaking glass and regular muffled screaming, even family vacations were unpleasant. Even my "friend" tells me their life is worse than mine and i dont have a reason to be sad and im started to believe them. Maybe, i deserve it all, maybe, it is all my fault: My parents had a big fight over an ant infestation and my mom slept in my room for 4 months and i was the one who left a cookie on the table that caused the infestation. Not only that but remember the 'abuse episode" i mentioned he started with me and then hit my mom and my sister when they tried to help me. Maybe, if i wasn't born my parents could be happy together. I'm lucky i had a father for 9 years, shouldn't i be happy? Maybe, i am just selfish and greedy and disgusting. I have anger issues like my dad but i never get physical or use any profane language. however im still scared ill turn into my father, soon and i deserve all of the pain he caused my mother and my sister. TL;DR I feel guilty because i don't think i'm "traumatized enough" and i DESERVE pain. Anyone else?

I will never let my kids feel like my parents did, especially my dad

Like for a father who would act like a nice father but be controlling you to hurt your mom, tell you to not be kind because people would take advantage and he’ll take advantage of your kindness himself then say sorry and keep on hurting you with the words and actions tell you you will be a begged and your sister will be a famous person then ask what he did wrong and after you cut connection he makes a whole text saying he wants to hug you and be a good father but you know he only wants money and he will hurt you again and make you feel like trash then act like everything is fine because you think this is what every 14 year old goes threw and now you feel like you’ll never be anything

it honestly hurts so bad. my dad doesn’t love me like he says he does. i feel so sad seeing my sister defend him, she still has hope he’ll change. but ive been told by my mom so many times he’s changing and he hasn’t ever. it hurts so bad seeing he is more concerned and nicer to people online than to his own daughter. i just want him to love me and that’s part of the reason i always forgive him. if i am disrespectful but if i don’t i am too. all i am to him is disrespect, a brat, spoiled, a b**ch, and crabby. (he has said i am all of those things). i just want his love, him to care, and him to change. i don’t know what love looks like, my parents fight and fought all my life. i honestly just wish they were divorced so i could be half-okay. im tired and exhausted for trying for him. im numb at this point i can’t cry anymore.

to dad- you werent even here for most of my life. you dont have any business trying to tell me "i need to know about your personal life". i learned everything myself. i raised my sister when my mom couldnt. everyday i had to sleep at my moms work on the floor in a blanket with my sister because there was no one at home to watch us. it hurts so much when your emotions are so prone to changing. my chest hurts thinking about you. i want to feel genuine care from you. "i love you" is empty to you. i would give anything to hear "im so proud of you" or "its okay, you did your best" from you. ive been trying so hard to manage on my own. i just want to hear something from you.

I just wanted him to love me as I am.

We all know that all the people watching this has daddy problems just like me and I would like to talk to people just like me because some time I feel alone. You know. It hurts💔when your dad leaves you, comes back and say things that we are going to do tomorrow but leaves that night. I wish he could tell me why. Why is my biggest question. Why did u leave?what did I do wrong? do you care about me? Wasn’t I good enough? DO YOU NOT LOVE ME ANYMORE? Just why?!??!! 🖤I still love u even if u left, even if u don’t love me. Thank u mom for being there for me and not leaving me, even if I sometimes got on your nerves. You stayed with me and never stopped loving me. You have cheered me on. I love you mom!!!❤️‍🩹I love you guys that have dad problems like me!!! Stay strong and don’t forget that if u need someone to talk to I’m here🥺 I’ll listen just like u read my comment. PS. I cried the whole time I was typing this😭

He used to be so happy with me, what happened? If you loved me why'd you run away? Why'd you leave me for some other kid? Was I not good enough for you? Is me and Kaleb too much to handle? Why'd you leave us? What happened? You haven't called us in almost 2 years... Why? You have our number. Why did you run from your problems? Why couldn't you just say sorry?

My dad was my first heartbreak, and I think that the things who breaks me the most is that he never did any thing a dad do for his daughter, he will not gonna be there for my first breakup, not there for my wedding, not gonna teach me all the things a dad can teach, I’m not gonna present him my first boyfriend, he’s not gonna tell me the danger that the boys are, he will not gonna be there for my majors, for my birthdays. He keeps making promises he can’t do, and because oh him my family is tearing appart, he destroys my mother and for that I could never forgive him. He not even try to be a paternal figure for me, he forgot me

the moment i clicked on this video , my fav song of billie started playing ,and i started crying ...you have no idea how much i am crying rn..

Today I realised that my relationship with my dad effects the way my present friendships & relationships are going with people. They all just wanna keep me with them but not love me , they cant let me go or be happy without them . They dont want me because they love me , they want me to make themselves feel better. to keep me with them & make me dependent on them. The power trip. They dont love me , they love the idea of me the idea of having me besides them & not let me leave or be happy without them . But when you love someone you let them go . You dont suffocate them or try to chop their wings so they never fly. I loved them all so much so much I was ready give my everything to people just so they like me. I couldn't bear being ignored by other people too - my dad already does.

I love how there are no dislikes whatsoever! 🥰

He says he loves me yet he's angry if I don't do what he wants.

Everytime I see kids with there dad I just hide my emotions but when someone talking adout how there dad left them I just break down crying how my dad left me

I'm not a victim. But every day I want to make myself one. I just want someone to love me, even if it's just because of my body. I want to run off to some older man and come out horrible for it because it'll all be worth it to have someone who cared for me. Even if just for a second.

it hurts to know that your father never actually cared about you.

I've only recently realized how emotionally screwed up my father has made me. I don't know why I want him to love me, but I'm scared of him hurting me further. He always has. I'll make sure my child never has to deal with this. Edit: my mom just heard me crying. I don't think I can explain to her.

My dad started to be abusive and started to drink right after my mom had me. He always hurt my family, never put a finger on me but the damage is still there after all these years. The yelling and drinking id over, but he's not in my life. All I remember of my dad is him yelling and being drunk, me and my mom crying and family rushing to help. The therepy still continues years after. He left me teriffied of any man older then a 12 year old boy. To anyone who lost their dad due to whatever reason you did, Im so sorry. The pain you feel from such a loss is unbalievable. Daddy is suppose to be there for his baby girl, to protect her, not harm her. We should feel save in our fathers arms not terrified to be in the same room as him. Im sorry to anyne that went/ is going trough this.

Everytime my mom says I am his daughter after all makes me want to disappear in thin air sorry I’ll never forgive him :)

tbh i really love my dad.yeah he's never been there for me but the memories i have with him are always full of fun,i miss him,it became to late to tell him after he got deported..i get so jealous sometimes when i see my sister with her dad and to be able to share her life with him in it,ik its wrong but i dont know.

Dear dad, I haven't spoken to you in more than a year. It hurts. But it hurt even more speaking to you and putting up with your abuse. I wonder why you decided to act this way with your own daughter. The verbal and emotional abuse. I can't think of happy moments together, I was always walking on eggshells around you. Now that I've grown up I left, I wanted to be free, to not hurt anymore but it still hurts. It will always hurt. I will always ask myself why, I will always fear rejection and abandonment because of you. I tried to make efforts but you refused to admit what you did wrong. Now I am far from you. But when I see dads laughing with and hugging their daughters it hurts. When I hear my uncle say "I love you" to my cousins it hurts so bad. I won't ever know this. Not because you weren't there but because you did not want to give your love to your own daughter. I am not angry anymore, I am just profoundly hurt and it won't ever go away. I have to live with it. How can I forgive you ? For now I can only grieve. If I ever have children I will make sure their dad is present and loving. And I certainly will not become like you. I am so scared of becoming like you. Your daughter

My dad is actually very loving and caring. I know he loves me and he says that too. But he is too overprotective of me and treats me like I'm gonna break into pieces any moment. I can't make my own decision. He makes it for me saying he knows what's best for me. He doesn't let me be sad when he scolds me and calls me selfish for not understanding him. And when I tries to stand up to him he goes all passive aggressive saying nobody cares about him and that we are just using him. I love him. But i really wish he'd stop doing this. He doesn't know I'm crying myself to sleep when he hurts me

He did bad things to my mother as a child, even rape. I was in the room next to it, and yet he took no sense that I could hear her screams and cries for him to stop. He never really acknowledged what I wanted as a kid, only what he wanted. He's starting to change, he wants forgiveness from me but it's hard to forgive him because of what he did, he ruined my childhood. It's horrible to see other kids or teenagers with a healthy bond with their father, a bond I never got the chance to have. I hate how "daddy issues" is a trend now, and how everyone wants it.. you don't want to have it, its horrible. I even had to stop my mother from committing suicide because of him, trust me, you do not want it.

I hate it when people say I look like my dad and I act like him. It just hurts because I don’t want to let people down like he does

my father was never by my side when I needed to, but over time I started to forget him, one more day before I moved he appeared and brought up all the pain that I kept for years without even realizing it,he had already shown up at my school too, luckily my friends helped me calm down, the worst thing was that he saw me in that state and didn't even care, these two times he laughed and smiled at me,after the school incident he disappeared for a while, and then there was his appearance on my move, it was a freak show, my mom screaming for him to leave while I tried to get some explanation for all these years from him. as the discussion went on i started to get really nervous, i was already screaming and shaking, my mom asked me to come in and i collapsed at the same time i went through the gate, i remember the feeling clearly, shortness of breath and pain, a lot of pain , more not physical, more it was a pain that came from inside me, the pain that I kept for years came out in a loud scream, I finally in years had thrown everything out. he just looked at me still smiling, my mother's friends helped me to get up, but I didn't have the strength I just knew how to cry because, in the end he left, after hours! he continued there trying to force me to accept him back, my mother did not hit him with a wire. I still remember when I was a child and I realized that he never loved me, he only approached me to know about my mother, and I bet he only showed up that day at school to worry my mom. more recently things have returned to normal, sometimes I realize that I forget him easily, and I don’t even blame myself as I used to, but I still remember me as child crying because I thought he was guilty, that I wasn’t the one enough, when in the end I was just a baby when he left me, so I literally did nothing I don't know if anyone else also felt bad when it was the days of the parents and had no one to give the gift to, and as everyone said "give it to those who take care of you", the problem was that I already understood that it was supposed to be him who should take care of me too, but I just asked myself "why?", it was always that I wanted to know. unfortunately on the day of the fight I discovered many things that I just didn’t cry because I just wanted to know why, but he deviated from it all the time and in the end I didn’t have an answer, but happily when I was growing up I realized that I didn’t need him, everyone who really cared of me and cared for me were there. for everyone with daddy issues, everything will be fine, you will make your dreams come true and show that you don’t need him. Also I'm fine now (actually it's been a while), so you don't have to worry Sorry for the long text,i really need talk about that

“The last thing I wanted was for you to be gay.” My dad didn’t think about how I’m not on drugs, barely not suicidal, I don’t have cancer, I’m not pregnant. But the last thing he wanted was for me to be with a woman. On my 16th birthday he told me he never really wanted me. He’d send me to conversation therapy if he could and he’s not coming to my wedding because religiously, I can’t get married.

Most of the time people ask why I don't cry about myself like if I fall over or mess something up it's cause my dad always said to me "don't feel sorry for yourself"

I wish you didn’t choose me second over my adult sister dad. I wish you were there for even one of my birthdays I wish you weren’t in prison for over half of them I wish you had chosen to get clean and sober I wish you could be the dad I need and always have needed I wish you were there I wish you weren’t dead I wish I could’ve hugged you even just once I wish I could’ve talked to you in person even just once I wish you had pulled through when you were in the hospital I wish you hadn’t chosen drugs and alcohol over me I wish I could hug you or even have that dream again and I can’t. I wish I had something to hold onto of you. I miss you dad

Idk why I hate my dad, if I told my mom she’d be mad since I don’t have a clear reason. He makes me so angry and sad by just being there I don’t trust him, he said so much to invalidate pretty much everything I do without noticing it.

You know the thing with my dad is that he is the best dad in the world most of the time. However when he is not in a good mood he doesn't care about anything and is a totally a different person, and it breaks me so much cause Im always trying to keep him happy and sometimes even the smallest thing make him explode. And then I go trying to make him happy and apologize for things that were his fault but I know that he would never apologize. And I hate the thought of him being mad at me

Father's day huh?

Anyone else cry cause of the comments. Can definitely relate alot, my Mum was cheating and I found out, I thought that I had to tell my Dad (step-dad since before I was 1 so issues x2) and he just ended up treating her horribly for months, they both got very depressed and he nearly killed himself multiple times due to alcohol poisoning and I'm always going to somewhat blame myself. After months of fighting and saying that they'd work it out they broke up after being together for 15 years, my Dad would talk shit about our Mum to my siblings and I throughout. After he left he stayed in contact for a while but eventually kind of gave up and constantly assumed that we all hated him and wanted him gone, always texting saying that we'd never see him again just like we 'wanted'. I got so angry because he never stopped to actually think about how it affected us and how depressed we were but at the same time felt like I couldn't be mad at him. Now after not talking for months he rarely texts and when I answer he just leaves me on read anyway, hes even been to see my other siblings since but not me which hurts because over the last years we finally really connected and our relationship had gotten great. Now I just don't know what to do...

lol today i realised something i have daddy issues. thanks dad for being an angel baby looking demon

for the ones reading it, pay attention: it goes away. it's cliche, you're kept waiting for how long it'll last but one day he will yell at you and even if your heart jumps like the crazy and you eyes start to make tears, your brain will be calm and you will feel you, you will know, and just know that he's yelling at you not cuz he hates you, but because he is the thing he most hates in the world, and he needs someone weaker to throw his anger into. and believe me, I know what I'm talking about. for a non binary, pansexual, atheist kid, i know what I'm talking about. this means I almost killed him with a knife, that I planned his murder hundreds of times (and still do to calm myself whenever he is _that_ version of him again), wanted to make myself go to the hospital so he would notice me and so many things. now, when he's screaming, i go deep down in myself and find my own love and the sure I'm bigger than him, better, stronger, and his loud tone is not because of me, but cuz he's so broken he needs this, cuz he's dumb and doesn't know how to do the right way, cuz he grew in the violence, cuz he hates himself. look inside of yourselves and know: you're beautiful, smart, capable, deserving. you WILL live better things. he does not defines you. you bigger, brighter, and you deserve love, affection and everything. don't let him take you down when you know yourself, when you r sure of who you are. he's nothing compared to you. he's a old and sad man. you will grow and shine. believe me, alright? don't harm yourselves because of someone so mean. with waves of love, b.

The other playlists for this are for people who are romanising it a bit and fetishising a bit But this ones made for people who actually go through it. This one actually hits. This one is healing.