a real weekend in anorexia recovery - the highs, the lows, and everything i ate *vlog* 

just a quick lil reminder for Ro & everyone, who's struggling w weight gain: your bmi/weight does NOT tell anything important about you. it does NOT tell you, how heavy your brain, bones & muscles are. it does NOT tell you, how hard working & heavy your internal organs are. it does NOT tell you, how valuable your beating heart is, and how heavy and supporting are your arms and legs. your body is KEEPING YOU ALIVE, working nonstop. your body IS MEANT TO have fat on it, your thighs are MEANT to touch, your stomach NEEDS to fold and roll while moving, it literally holds all your internal organs. your chest is MEANT to get bigger, it will one day (maybe) feed a baby human being. your hips NEED to be round and soft, they support you & also one day (maybe) will hold a living human being!! your body IS MEANT TO CHANGE, EVERY. SINGLE. DAY.

I really really appreciate, that Ro doesn’t post any before and after images & doesn’t say/show any numbers!! So many „ED recovery“ accounts somehow feel like they have to prove how sick they are/where and that’s just not helpful. When actually these pics and numbers just trigger our brains and even if we don’t like to admit it, many of our ED brains are so so competitive. Ro‘s Account is literally the only trigger free recovery account that actually helps me recover.

"I think people underestimate how exhausting having a brain is" If that ain't the truest thing I've heard all year 😂

Anyone else thinking that ro's style and make up is absolutly amaze?

“I think people underestimate how exhausting having a brain is; like it doesn’t turn off” (13:24) I mean- faaaacts You made my day gurl

I got diagnosed with anorexia just over a week ago and have been in recovery ever since. I’m really struggling, it’s so hard and my brain isn’t being very kind to me but these videos help me more than you know. You are amazing Ro, thank you xxx

(Mental Health nurse here), I was 1:1 nursing a young girl in hospital this week, and she was having a really tough day. Her ED voice was so loud that day. My heart was breaking for the pain she was in. In the afternoon we watched some of your videos. She still had a hard, hard day, but your videos *helped*. Hearing the internal voice spoken out loud and challenging it the way you do, with self-compassion, is so healing. She will have many hard days ahead, but she will wake up tomorrow morning with a bit more hope than she had the day before. And that says it all really. Hope. With hope, we have a chance. And knowing you are not alone. ❤️

I was struggling to have my noon snack because I know ill eat at a restaurant for dinner..but as I was finding myself reasons to restrict 'til dinner time, your notification popped on my screen. All of that just to say that the cereal bar I'm eating right now is absolutely delightful. Thank you, Ro.🥰

also i can't wait for the 'eating like my childhood-self' video!! it's a great idea

I really appreciated what your friend said. Eating is just so natural-it is something to be enjoyed and not overthought about. It is like breathing and sleeping. It is natural for your body

Does anybody else just get a boost of positive energy in their day whenever Ro posts? Her strength is so inspiring. Thank you so much Ro for sharing your journey with us, it REALLY is helpful for me. Lots of love and support from Guatemala! ❤️🇬🇹 You got this girl!

“Courage isn’t having the strength to go on- it’s going on when you don’t have the strength” :)

I have complex PTSD and that spaced out feeling you described sounds like dissociation. It's really worrying when you don't know what it is, but it's just your brain trying to protect you when you feel overwhelmed ❤️ Sounds weird but throwing and catching something can be really grounding if you feel that way!

If the eyes are the window to the soul, then your soul is a beautiful, shining crystal.

5 seconds in and you’re already glowing 🥰 Ro, you’re honestly the biggest inspiration for me rn! I challenged a fear food yesterday and I feel like you also deserve some credit bc you made me feel like it’s worth it, even if it’s hard and not “pretty” :,) thank you so much, you’re really changing lives for the better, and I wish you all the best for your journey ahead

can we take a little moment and talk about, how pretty her eyes are? u are a really important part of the internet and taught me and so many others a lot. thank u a lot. we love u, u r so strong and such an inspiraton ♡

cried all night & decided to go all in this morning!! absolutely terrified but seeing your energy and strength grow has been so instrumental in this decision so thank you for putting out the content that you do !!!

Don’t mind me, just casually venting my anorexia-recovery story to show things get better I think for the past 7 years I’ve been hyper-aware of my body, I remember my first year of middle school squeezing my legs and comparing myself despite looking back being slightly underweight. Over the years my body dysmorphia definitely went wack, I would starve myself for a couple days or exercise heavily, but it never really stuck until i discovered “veganuary” last year (definitely NOT saying that veganism is a gateway to EDs! this is just my experience, i’m still vegan too). It basically helped me control my eating to the point I became orthorexic and was completely obsessed with being healthy, counting calories, and losing weight. I eventually started purging and doing anything to lower my intake of calories. Over time my brain got foggier and I could see my ribs through my shirt. I remember last March being rushed to the hospital to get an IV because the doctors couldn’t get my blood pressure because it was so low, and I remember being so foggy I could barely think. I had the choice to go to an outpatient or inpatient ED clinic and I chose outpatient, which i went to the very next day. A couple weeks in and I still wasn’t getting any better and needed a feeding tube. I “recovered” and was discharged but inside I still had plans to relapse, which happened about 3 months later. The relapse completely strained my heart, for a couple days I needed a wheelchair to get around and had to get a heart monitor and ultrasound, and was later officially diagnosed with POTS, aka despite being fully recovered I’m still orthostatic. What really pushed me to recover was to think about what I wanted to do in the future, which was to return to aerial and be active again. I made incredible friends at the clinic both times I was there, and I’ve been fully discharged for around 8 months now. There’s definitely still some ups and downs and I’m still on the meal plan, I still have trouble eating new things (I have peanut butter banana toast for both breakfast and lunch every day) but it helps to not have to think too hard about it. I also still have trouble eating “snacks” as well and my severe body dysmorphia is still in the background however much quieter. Now I’m active and planning to get back into aerial silks and trapeze, and my mental health has been immensely better now that I’ve discovered my identity and sense of style. I think my biggest tip for what motivated me to recover was to think about what I wanted to do in the future, and how staying trapped in my ED was keeping me from what I desperately wanted to do. Don’t give up folks, it genuinely does get better very slowly, each tiny step in the right direction is better than how you were a second ago

I hope I’m welcome here, I’m actually recovering from binge eating. My therapist said that therapy approaches for bingeing may look a lot like restrictive ED recovery because you need to focus on a structured meal plan in order to not binge. My bingeing was also caused by extreme restriction, so I’d go long periods without eating much but you wouldn’t know by looking at me because I’d have massive binges. Your videos are a huge help for me to follow my meal plan of 3 meals and 3 snacks a day to overcome my binge eating. Thanks so much❤️

hey ro, i wanted to tell you that you're one of the reasons why i started in the 'real-recovery'. when i watch your videos i feel like, for once, i have someone, like a friend, who struggles with the same problems as me. just like you, i want to gain my life and my honest realitionship with my mother back, to become a better, healthy version of myself, and for this i want to say thank youu

When Ro said she wants her body to trust her, it made me sad and joyous at the same time 💛💛

Ro, just a random compliment. I love your singing voice. When you sing breifly in your videos it is calming and nice to hear.

Ro- or anyone who needs to hear this- After being in recovery for a year and a half now I just want to say that you often experience the worst of it right before it begins to get better. There were so many instances where I just wanted to give up. I wished my brain would shut off like you said, I was so mentally exhausted. You are valid for everything that you feel right now, remember that. But please know that the work you are putting in, it may not seem like it now, but it truly will change the course of your life. You, along with everyone who is going through recovery, are an inspiration to us all. You got this!! Don’t give up. Forever cheering you on through the screen

Your doggie is so adorable! Aren’t dogs the best recovery buddies 💜

I've been in recovery since the end of March, thanks to your videos I was strong enough to tell my family about it, I think that was the hardest part, admitting to my family and myself that I had an ED. Because I somehow felt guilty about putting myself in this situation. But now almost 3 months in recovery I've learned so much, I feel like i getting my life back, I feel alive. Thank you, for giving me strength and making me feel like I'm not fighting alone 💜

i just really wanna thank you. it's my dad's birthday today and i had cake at midnight,, but i just couldn't let go of the guilt and decided to skip dinner. but after watching this, i want you to know that pizza was damn amazing

Ro, although having a slightly different journey I always struggled and still struggle with a positive mindset towards food/eating - your videos give me so much peace, hope and happiness and I am really proud of you, although we don't know eachother. Keep doing what you're doing (as long as you're happy) and thanky you for your beautiful videos :)

I think I need to start a journal of helpful quotes from these videos because I seriously repeat them in my head when I want to restrict and it always helps

its so comforting to know that im not the only one struggling. thank u

I am so proud of how far you’ve come. You are a fighter and a true inspiration for me to keep going 💗

You're doing absolutely amazing! It's rough, I get it, but your will has already been SO strong, and it WILL get easier! From what I've seen it's already gotten easier, it's just slow-going, and that's to be expected! I'm cheering you on! You deserve it! ❤

You look sooo good!!!🥰and it seems like you have a lot more energy, than in the beginning of your recovery! I'm so happy for you!

I get more and more proud of you with every video. Sending you all the love and strength Ro 🤍

I totally relate to having more breakouts in recovery, and it's so frustrating. Thank you for sharing this and making me feel seen

I've watched you from the very start and you can honestly see you becoming your true self again and it's so amazing to watch 🥺 proud of you xx

Thankyou for being honest! have been feeling the same today but know it is going to be okay! You got this! We both do!! Have a nice day!

You're so strong, please keep going it's going to get easier and easier and it is so freeing. I know it's hard but you deserve happiness ❤

You make me so happy. Honesrly just seeing you get through the hard times and keep going even when it gets rough makes me so motivated in my anxiety and BED recovery 💜💜💜

i just realized how close you are to 100K subs! you've come so far both with your recovery and also with this channel. please keep doing what you do, i love you💘💘

Ro watching your journey is truly remarkable. The progress you've made is fantastic. Wishing you nothing put continued success.

Ro seeing that you seem to genuinely enjoy your food and you're excited about the new tastes and textures makes me so happy for you

Wow your first video you posted 5 months ago came up in my recommended videos today so I watched it and then came to this video and you look so much healthier already! You seem to be happier and have more energy too! Keep on doing what you're doing because it's working!! Congratulations!

so proud of how for you’ve come! 🤍

I’ve been watching your journey from close to the start and I couldn’t believe I wasn’t subbed so thank you for reminding us in your vid! Xxx you’re doing great btw girl. Much love from Australia ☀️

How lovely it has been these last few videos to see more and more of your personality, now that you have more energy. I have so much respect for you Ro, and I am in absolute awe of your strength and your determination.

you are my biggest inspiration keep fighting (i know you will never stop) you make the recovery community proud THANK YOU for such a wholesome video, they really do make my week 💞

Recovery is so fricken worth it, you are so worth it. You've got this💛🧡

I found your channel not long ago but I’m already in love! Ur literally so real and inspirational and I really appreciate that you show the tough sides to recovery as well as the good, congrats on 100k btw! 💕

Ro so proud of you, your a wonderful human being and can’t wait to see everything you achieve keep striving in life ❤️❤️❤️❤️

You’re are glowing, like you’re truly so bright and radiant in this

thank you for making these videos. as someone who really struggles with food and doesn't have a very comforting home environment, these help sm. ily and i wish you all the greatest things

You are an absolute inspiration. Honestly girl - you speaking so honestly and pushing so hard has pushed me to do the same.

watching your recovery journey makes me feel like it's possible to recover! thank you so much ro

You’ve got the most amazing support system and that is SO lovely to see! Keep ploughing through gal 💛

your friend is an amazing support and i’m so happy you found a friend like her :)

Just wanted to say how proud I am of you!! I’m currently struggling a lot with recovery mentally and your videos really help me out so much. You’ve come so far and it helps me believe I can get through the tough days

Ro watching you just gives me another reason to keep on on my recovery. so thank you :)

You are genuinely the only recovery channel that actually motivates me to actually get better (and isn't triggering to me)

I’m so proud of her she come so far omg hopefully I can recover soon ❤️❤️

YOU ARE BRILLIANT!!! honestly so inspirational 💕

You are absolutely glowing Ro you truly are beautiful inside and out and i love that as you progress in your journey towards recovery i can see the light in your eyes shining with you.

You can really be proud of yourself 💙 I recognize myself so much in your feelings and you help me a lot to advance in my recovery, thank you

I know this has been hard but you are absolutely glowing! I’m so proud of you. I’m about 5 years recovered and I promise it gets easier

Feels so crazy to say you feel proud of someone you don’t know IRL but I am SOOO PROUD of you! You got this Ro!! Xx

Every time you struggle I just want to give you a hug. You are so strong! 🥰

oh Ro, I am so happy to your progress. You inspire me every time you post a new video. Thank so so so so so much

this is so so much helping for me right now, i’m in recovery as well since a few months, and i’m working in a camping all summer because i’m in a stable state of my recovery (and "weight restored" even if i know it doesn’t mean a lot). But i feel very anxious right now because i can’t eat how i’m used to and i live with my co-worker… i just feel very very overwhelmed but i almost cried of relief or joy i don’t know when i saw your notification. You helped me a lot in my recovery Ro, thank u 💕

I just wanted to say thank you. Since I’ve started watching you I’ve started eating more of my ‘fear foods’ and I think it’s really helped me. You’re amazing Ro❤️❤️

It made me smile when you said “I just got a wave of anxiety.” And your dad said “save it goodbye.”🩵

3 full months of recovery today!! Thank you for inspiring and motivating me with every single one of your videos

Mate, your energy the past few months has really shot right up 😁😁. I love seeing this 🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻🙌🏻

It’s so moving to see how far you’ve come with your recovery. It has actually helped me have a guideline as to how to ground myself and talk to myself since my parents are no where near as understating as yours.

Also can we appreciate how amazing your friend is and so supportive!! X

I had a video of yours recommended by RU-vid, and I don't struggle with food, but you (and your family) are so likable and your videos are very calming and captivating somehow, so I followed you 😊

You look STUNNING in this! Thank you for doing this channel, it helps me so much💜💜💜💜

ur so real and helpful honestly , u are such an amazing person ily sm 🤍❤️

I just want to say I'm very proud of you. You are a strong woman. I have been trying little by little but im doing it. You helped me. Thank you ❤

you give me such good vibes, I really love watching your videos and I‘m always so excited when I get to watch a nee video of yours:)) you‘re amazing!

Thank you for putting your journey out there. While my struggle with food is different from yours I am learning so much from you and the kindness you give yourself. Your will to keep going everyday and to share where you are in the process speaks volumes about how committed you are to your recovery. I appreciate your candor and thank you for being the beautiful, open soul that you are- truly amazing. Wishing you only the best! Be well💖

I think what is so great about your recovery is you are amazing at talking about your thoughts. Most people just keep their thoughts to themselves which often makes it a lot harder

Ro, whoever that friend is she seems so amazing and supportive!! Love that for you

I keep eating along when I watch your videos. It’s been a long time in recovery for me, but it’s still nice.

Its fantastic to see you still pushing so hard after all this time

"I think people underestimate how exhausting having a brain is" I felt that on a spiritual level

you are my biggest inspiration! words cannot describe how much i appreciate and love you Ro! Keep on winning

Ro's videos just make me feel comfortable, because she shows the reality and how difficult it is, but her determination makes me believe I'll get over it! THANK YOU FOR BEING YOU!!!❤️

I saved this video for the end of my day, cause I wanted to finish it with something positive. Recovery is not going so well lately and I'm really struggling, and your videos are one of the only things that makes me feel like it's going to get better. Thank you so much for being such an inspiration. You are amazing!! ❤

can I just say I absolutely love the way you’ve decorated your room!

I really appreciate how you keep sharing your struggles, it really goes to show that just because you've gained weight, it doesn't mean that you're fully recovered. Please keep doing what you do, it's helping and inspiring so many people, including me. Wishing you all the best

i love the longer vlogs ro, & you are doing so well beautiful

Ro I am really proud of you, counteny the hard work, do your best❤️❤️

I'm so incredibly grateful for your vlogs. They're so relaxing and helpful, especially during times of crisis. 💕💕💕💕

this made me cry, Im sturggling with an ed right now and this video is inspiring me to change! I love you so much and I'm so happy I discovered your channel!

I love your videos so much! I've never fully given in to the want to restrict myself, but the guilt about eating is always there. These videos are motivating me to keep eating and keep looking after myself :)

Wow your eyes are so beautiful😍 they have litterally been glowing for the last few weeks ❤️

You are the best Ro! Helping me so much! I feel safe eating while watching you're videos. You go girl!❤ Love!!!

you are literally my idol in recovery.. your so strong , we see u and as u said it’s the not giving up that gets u closer to being 100% at peace with it all .. ily take care

I had a pretty bad relapse in May after having a somewhat healthy relationship with food for 1 year and your videos have helped so much 💕 thank you so much 😊

it's so helpful to see you getting better ro

wow, i way that u push yourself is honestly so inspiring. i can’t tell u how proud i am, if i was in ur shoes i know for a fact i wouldn’t have the strength to do what u do. KEEP GOING!