Much more. I use many of techniques you talked about in this video, too. I have also learned to block out other’s energies. I’m such an oasis, and all these other energies, thoughts and moods started really exhaust me, especially negative ones. So I had to learn to shut them out. It wasn’t and isn’t easy. Still struggling sometimes!
More sensitive! My 6 siblings are all very aggressive, abusive and cold. If I do meet someone who is sensitive, I tend to befriend that person. Thankfully, I like crowds! =)
I am EXTREMELY highly sensitive. If someone snaps at me, says something the wrong way, looks at me wrong, I WILL tear up and shut down, and it can ruin my whole day. I avoid confrontation at all costs and even feel anxious if I feel I overshared something I wanted to keep to myself. It’s tough.
can you tell me the solution. I feel like I really need some solution. plz someone help me but don't tell me to open up to family, they made me uncomfortable to share just anything and friends there's no one ready to listen and also if there's anyone I'm just not able to share a single word, idk how to do this
@@najmussaherOT7 you can try talking to chat gpt first, to train your ability to share smth. Once you're confident, you can use anonymous chats with real ppl, and then maybe friends (if you want to)
I am highly sensitive and I have lots of empathy. People can be draining. I am not comfortable around loud noises and prefer to be in nature . Thank you Vera! ☮️
@@stevethomas74 Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
Jennie, Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
@@shyaaammeneen63 I try to do a few of those things (especially the group activities as I love walking so I'm in a few Meetup walking groups). Thanks for your input :)
Sensitivity is good for many things: Creativity, music, art, intelligence, analytical skills, empathy, caring, listening skills, lie detection, atmosphere creation, calming things down, choosing your words carefully, bonding, friendship... the list goes on.
I was venting about being sensitive with a friend, and they said something very wise, "Because you're sensitive you'll be able to bridge gaps that have never been crossed and see things that are invisible to others."
@@soph8164 It's like you're referencing the same research I was thinking about. I think the finding was that sensitive people are better at bridging the gaps, but they're susceptible to burn out when doing so. They may even report that they're bad at it despite being much better than the average.
I am 68 years old, and this is the first time I have heard positive things about being highly sensitive. All my life it has been, "You're too sensitive. Buck up" etc. Thank you for the tips. I feel certain they are going to help me. Big smile.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts! I'm so happy you enjoyed the video and found the tips helpful 🤗🌷 Actually, I have an entire playlist about being highly sensitive, with lots of positivity 😊 The videos are quite old but I still like them myself and I think they could be helpful as well. So if you're interested, feel free to check it out: ru-vid.com/group/PLpDAC25h6PC8v5bhadp2pKQrK_0e4sd55
Thanks for bringing this out in the open for others who have no idea that this is just one way that people are different. Some humans just cannot fathom what it is like to be different.
@@SimpleHappyZen Re. @intigniadickey2224: Thank you so much; this is so much me! I'm even older (75), and most of my life has been making excuses for my 'me' time, and excuses for being overwhelmed, and needing my sleep regularity, etc. ...Very helpful!
Music is my safe place... I have been able to do live music pretty well, I feel the connection to the crowd energetically. It is getting a little more difficult , I am picking and choosing more carefully.
I am indeed sensitive, empath, an introvert and also an INFJ. How did I manage to stay alive (I do have anxiety issues) is nothing less than a wonder in my eyes.
I don’t know. My best girlfriend had real sympathy for me when she said aw, you’re just too sensitive. She wasn’t like me, , she was caring, but she felt bad for me.
My husband would often tell me to get out of my comfort zone. Usually it meant doing things that overwhelmed me. I asked one day why it was always me that had to do this, and not him. Now I know where to set boundaries
I'm a tough person, thus it's hard for me to understand my sensitive friends. Their reactions are often unintuitive for me. I came here to learn and understand the topic better. ^^'
Just the fact that you are taking the time to understand your sensitive friends better tells me you are a better friend than any of the people I have surrounded myself with in the past 7 years. Thank you for being a good person, I hope I meet someone like you one day.
I've learned to hide how I feel. Growing up, I was always treated as a drama queen for being so sensitive. Nowadays, however bad I feel, I look calm and composed on the outside. I don't even care to show how I feel anymore. Why talk in a world where no-one listens? I can't wait to have kids of my own. I will shower them with all the love and kindness that I can give. At least someone will benefit from my sensitivity.
Good for you…..When my sons were born I finally had someone to love who would take me as I am and not make me feel put down all the time. I did everything I could to raise them the opposite of what I went through as a child. Both of my sons have done very well in their adult lives. What a blessing they have been to me.
I’m 58 years old and I hear “you are too sensitive” I recently respond “God made me this way.” Loud noises gets under my skin and I can’t even think. I love being in nature. The news, sad, violent movies effects me for days and sometimes weeks. Subbed. Thank you for sharing.
Everything you said I can relate to. I have seen something on the news and went to bed and woke up the next day with tears in my eyes. I’ve read other stories and went to my son crying about a story I just read about an animal. I love nature as well. It’s so calming. I have recently been thinking something is wrong with me. Sometimes I cry so easy and I hate that. But Vera is such a help to explain all this. It really helps. Good luck to you. Thanks for sharing your story.
I still remember how upset I was when I saw my first violent movie many years ago….Pork Chop Hill…at age 12. I always wondered why it upset me so much. Through the years I have learned to avoid all such things. Can’t do it!
I am definitely Highly Sensitive. I have the complications of Fibromyalgia, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Psoriasis and Menopause too! In the past few months I have started to really prioritise rest, sleep, alone time and setting boundaries.
One of the things that i have learned, over many decades, is that people who too readily accuse others of being "too sensitive" are very often bullies. Their pronouncements are their cowardly attempt to deflect responsibility for their cruelty.
I’m an empath with an anxiety disorder. I’ve been trying to learn how to keep myself grounded for years. My son is 6 and he’s exhibiting the same “overly" sensitive and anxious traits I did growing up. I’m hard on him sometimes because i don’t want him to be an anxious mess like me, but this video really helps change my perspective - that being sensitive isn’t a personal flaw. I think I need to sit down with him and talk about real coping mechanisms instead of getting upset when he’s being my mirror.
Thank you for sharing your experiences! I think what you said about talking and discussing coping mechanisms sounds great. Also, Elaine Aron also has a book called The highly sensitive child. I haven't read it myself, but it might be helpful for you. Take care!
I suggest that you fix your relationship with him first then you start teaching him about what can help him , you can't be punishing someone for something you do it yourself especially that he's a child of yours because children tend to to learn more from their parents and the environment they grow up in . Being anxious is already a load itself being hard on him WILL just ADD to his anxiety which is something you must know it yourself . also being hard on someone no matter what problem they might have is not a solution unless they decide it for their selves and that's a fact you cant deny if you're wondering why I'm speaking , I'm already suffering from anxiety and and a high sensitivity person with a condition called hyperhidrosis , my mother is a nervous person who can get mad on anything .i think that's enough for me to talk about this . and I really hope you fix what's between the two of you.
Dear Passa Cookie…you are not alone! I am also a highly sensitive anxious mom raising a little boy who is my carbon copy! I am hard on him too sometimes. I know exactly how feel about not wanting him to be an anxious mess. I have taught him about being highly sensitive and how it’s not a flaw. I also try to balance out times when I may be too hard or critical with being extra kind and snuggly with him. He is a big time snuggler and getting lots of hugs or laying down next to him at bedtime seems to cancel out the times I’ve been too tough. And apologizing when you’ve hurt his feelings is a good thing too!
I mean I'm sorry but how the fuck can you be an empath and be hard on your son for showing signs of anxiety? I mean wouldn't a supposed empath understand that treating a child with anxiety harshly because of their anxious traits isn't a very empathetic or helpful way to go about it? How did it ever help you for example?
@@NinjaOutfitInTheWash Your comment is why I don't usually comment on videos. I'm an overwhelmed parent with two kids on the spectrum doing my best and recognizing that I can do better / actively working on doing better. Instead of acknowledging that or sounding concerned or offering advice, you jump down my throat for a situation you don't know anything about except for my overly simplified description. By "being hard on him" I mean constant nagging (not screaming or hurting my child). When he's exhibiting anxious tendencies, they don't always come across as "being anxious," so it's hard to identify. Lift people up instead of putting them down.
Wow, growing up as a sensitive man in slavic country was very confusing, I would always think that there is something unacceptable about me when around people. Something that I need to change for good. Then I realized, that I just need to take different approach to life than most people.
Yep, this is me. Can’t stand people, social situations, noise, having to rush, too many tasks to do, even clutter or extra stuff lying around. I am a nurse and had to switch to working nights with one patient in home care to get away from all the chaos. I was constantly anxious and having difficulty remembering things. We are all different. Some thrive on fast paced activities and constant busyness and some of us just can’t handle all that.
My boyfriend is always telling me I need to be more tough and that the world is not as shiny and beautiful as I think… I have to say I believed him and I started watching loud movies with war scenes in it. I’ve been getting more tough but I’m also feeling more and more depressive because of all the stimulie around me I have to handle.
Maybe reconsider this relationship. Watching "loud movies with war scenes" will never make you a better person, but it will only upset and desensitize you. Why would a good boyfriend want to do that to you?
I am an engineer and I love using car analogies to describe things in life. Son just like we value the sensitive sensors in a car, as they are important for the machine overall, so we must value highly sensitive people, we are an important part of the world
Highly sensitive. But we make good mom's. I avoid too many people. I've been heart hurt by random strangers many times. I try to help my kids be emotionally stronger than I am.
I'm glad I'm not alone who is very sensitive person...I hate when my family tell me how much sensitive I am... Whenever I get angry I always try distance myself from other so I won't cry in front of them... Sometimes I even tried to hold my tears and at the end..i did crying in front of them... So thank you doing this video zen...
I have grown to avoid and sometimes detest people who speak down on me for being sensitive. It goes beyond lack of understanding. They can be hurtful, which only makes me more sensitive.
I'm a hsp as well, and what drives me crazy is loud noises, fast and intense talkers, fast paced lifestyle that is surrounding me in a City, modern mainstream garbage music, traffic, strong smells, bad news, violent movies, when people rush me, and the list goes on... What helps me though, is trying to live a simple and minimal life, sleeping at least 8 hours a night, going on walks regularly in nature to recharge, where "few" people go. Trying to eat more healthy, even though that can be super challenging since the bad stuff is comforting and tastes yummy, lol... I try to be organized, prepared and tidy, but i'm still working on that and have a long way to go... I take earplugs with me everywhere I go, so if it gets too noisy I put them in, especially when I'm shopping. Even though I try to go shopping during less busy times, like evenings when most people start getting ready for bed, lol... I even put ear plugs in sometimes when my loud and intense speaking neighbours babble or when my family get together... They make joking remarks and give me the look, like I'm not ok upstairs, lol... I find oldies, classic, soft jazz & spa music soothing... Being around positive, soft spoken and down-to- earth people is a plus for me when I am around people... But the majority of people don't understand me, and I find it difficult to make deep friendships, because I just don't click with most people, and Vice Versa. I can tell that according to them there's something wrong with me, but at least now I'm learning to accept myself as I am. And a few deep friendships that I can count on one hand is more than enough for me anyway...We hsp do have many positives too, so it's not all bad! 😊🌿
I’m happy to see more being said these days about highly sensitive people because I am one. All my life I’ve been led to believe it’s a character flaw and that there is something wrong with me. When people told me I was too sensitive, I was hurt and angry at the same time. I wondered what was wrong with me because I couldn’t be as outgoing and relaxed as others around me. I wish it had been better understood and accepted years ago so I wouldn’t have felt so awkward and out of step. I was surprised when you mentioned exercise and how it affected you because that’s the way it affects me but no one seems to understand, they say it’s laziness. Thank you for sharing these techniques for coping. ❤️
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts Carolyn, it's things like what you mentioned that make me think it's so important to talk about this more. :) Take care and have a lovely day!
To me your comment makes a whole lot of sense. I am not highly sensitive at all, but it's only obvious that excersizing can drain you mentally; there is a lot of movement going on in the gym plus there is music, and people talking. One might drop a dumbell or whatever which only adds to the overall sound overdose. I do workout regularily, and all these things I've described above don't bother me at all, but it's only logical that it does this to you, and that is no laziness at all. It can only be said as laziness by people who want to tease you, who only see the negative, or who simply don't understand you, which often happens if these people are way different than you are. If you ask me, there's nothing wrong with being sensitive or highly sensitive. But because it is an extreme trait (hence the word 'highly') it is only obvious that these things affects you equally extreme. No wonder you're hurt by what these people say to you. On the other hand I can only imagine the benefits of being highly sensitive: I bet you can love much deeper and feel those positive emotions way more than people who are not as sensitive as you are. And that is something I hope you treasure in yourself. :) And even people who are not highly sensitive - such as myself - can still understand you by at least taking you serious. I hope this message helps you somehow.
@@Leto85 What a kind, empathetic comment! Even though your comment wasn't directed toward me, I appreciate your kindness. There are such lovely people in the world such as yourself!💚
It sounds small but another thing to avoid for us sensitive souls is comment sections. (Ironic saying this in a yt comment section) but I find that going into the common sections of tiktoks or reels and posts on instagram can be extremely toxic and full of hate, people argue over anything on there so reading all of that can be extremely emotionally draining.
This is the first time I've heard positive comments about being sensitive. "Antisocial, does not participate, thinks too much, no fun, etc". Funnily, it usually comes from people who don't like my honesty, my boundaries, my autonomy, or my positive relationships that exclude the person giving the negative feedback. I have unknowingly adopted all the techniques in this video EXCEPT the idea that it is perfectly fine to be sensitive. My favorite experiences are with people who are sensitive enough to be intensely creative. I want to pivot my attention away from the brute force complainers, and towards the folks that recharge my life by appreciating my sensitive approach to creating value.
It feels like you're reading my mind... It's like wow I'm actually not the only person that takes water, a chapstick and noise cancelling headphones whenever going out. Thank you so much!
I agree that arriving early and traveling the less hectic route are so helpful. I have always known this works better for me. I hate being rushed. I love meeting with one or two people but not a large, noisy group. I've always felt I build strong friendships because I am fully present with the people close to me. Your video is validating that there are pluses to having these characteristics. Thank you!
Hello! I'm the gal who tackled her 30 years-basement of life by removing 1 grocery bag of stuff a week. I'm way more sensitive than most people, on the inside too. I get motion sick, car and boat sick, I can't look down and then up sometimes without serious dizziness; I can get hives; I have senstivity to light, and also get migraines; smells can get to me, solutions and hand santizers and surface wipes makes me feel like the Marianne Moore character in the movie SAFE (like I have Environmental Illness). Yah, so all this and loving the tips. Release our fear and pack that tote bag!
I'm sooo sensitive that I have to be careful about which RU-vidrs I watch, because I can't tolerate people who talk too loud, too fast and too much 😆 Also videos full of colours, lights and 50 different angles stress me out. That's why your channel is my safe place because I feel really comfortable and even I recharge my energy 🤗
I have struggled with low self esteem most of my life, and I believe much of it stemmed from feeling out of place and different. I’ve been told to toughen up since I was a kid. Only recently have I begun to understand who I am and more importantly be ok with it. Thank you so much for videos like this! They are little confidence boosters.
I swear, something small just happened and I got very upset, then I got angry at myself for getting upset, I made a big deal out of it and started crying asking why am I like this? Two minutes later, I came across this video.
Boundaries are often underestimated, but I've come to realise that they're a real boon to up your confidence and self respect in situations that make you uncomfortable.
I am also a hsp! I used to see it as a negative trait, but I decided to accept the fact I am sensitive and learn how to live with sensitivity. I know it could be hard especially when you have to face a lot of stressful situations. But here’s some tips for you all! 1. Make a simple to-do list. (This helps me not to freak out even when I have a ton of things to do. But I recommend you to keep it less than 5 tasks per day.) 2. Try yoga! (I personally think people at yoga class are super nice and gentle😌✨) 3. Forest bathing. (If you’re living in a city like me, you could probably go to a park or even zoo!) 4. Live in a routine. 5. Take supplements. Some nutrition helps us to maintain our mental health. If you are having trouble with sleep, take melatonin. If you feel stressed, probably you can try gaba or vitamin D/B!! I understand how hard it is to live with sensitivity nowadays, but it got much easier when I accepted and sifted how I think about it. Now I believe god gave me the sensitivity to let me actually feel emotions and appreciate what I have. A lot of people don’t even see the beauty in this world, but we do! Just appreciate what we have got and live with it 😌💖 you’re not alone!! Sensitivity is a special gift 💝
Thank you for the tips! As a sensitive guy, I certainly feel things deeper. It can be exhausting but on the other side, being sensitive means that I am not afraid to be vulnerable and can make long lasting friendships :)
The worst thing for me is nervous or violent parents at public spaces. Especially mothers tend to shout at their children when they don't sit absolutely still at one place all the time or when they talk "loud" when the other people sit or stand in silence. Public transport is sometimes a nightmare.
Good advice. I’m an introvert. Being in loud social situations with lots of talking wears me out.I have to decompress afterwards. Thanks for the helpful tips!
Yes, decompress! That's the word I'm trying to say but couldn't find it. Thank you for sharing. 😂 If I attend a party or an intense discussion or meeting, it would take even days to decompress 😢
Such wonderful tips, I especially love the second about acceptance. It reminds me of a time I was recovering from heartbreak, and telling a friend that "I am so sensitive and take a while to process... I need to get better/faster at processing." My friend told me that no, I processed perfectly and uniquely how I should. That conversation stuck with me, and has helped me better appreciate and care for my sensitive lil self haha. *Much love to all my fellow sensitive souls* 💜😊
I will say as a life long sensitive person, when I was horribly burnt out at my hospital job as a nurse, I could not tolerate intense exercise, it would trigger migraines and nausea and ruin a whole day, I tried to “push through” and I came to realize it never worked, no amount of will power could overcome the intense physically ill feeling it would induce. Now that I have been a year out from switching to a lower stress job I have incorporated more intensity and weight training which can help with stamina and guard us from fatigue. My personal experience is that it depends a lot on my current life circumstances how I will tolerate exercise.
What do you do now? Are you still in the nursing field? I am an aspiring nurse but often worry that I will quickly be overwhelmed as I am also very sensitive.
@@nmariekuu Do a few public speaking courses. Join group activities even if you feel uneasy. Dont compare yourself with others. Practice assertiveness. Never say"YES" when you want to say "NO'. Develop your mental muscles. Reduce negative thoughts with a simple practice. Your breath and mind [brain] are closely related causing stress-anxiety. For a better life sit on a chair, neck straight, eyes closed and observe the sensations of your incoming--outgoing breath at the entrance of the nostrils for 5-10-15 minutes or more. Don’t fight your thoughts. Slowly the mind will relax. No deep breathing needed. Do the practice without any expectations. Change happens from within by itself. Day or night, when taking a walk, sitting in a park, when reading, before sleep etc sit or lie down and observe your breath. Like me, make this a lifetime daily habit to have a good life. Avoid constipation as it affects the mind instantly. Best wishes Shyaaam Sir. -Counsellor.
I found out I was an empath by accident on social media. Scrolling through Facebook. I was in my early 60's. I am 65 now. It was definitely an eye opener. The answer to a lot of questions. We are very special people and it can take a toll on me everyday. Thanks for the tips. I really appreciate it. This was a great video. Welcome to the family of sensitives.
Excellent video....very helpful! I'm 62 years old, highly sensitive and just watching this has me crying! How many times I heard over the years that I am "overly" sensitive. I even yelled at my mom as an adult....why are you always trying to change me? I also get ....you are so defensive....now I know why! It's exhausting!
The survival kit really resonated with me! ❤️ It's been a journey for me to accept that I need to have a snack at hand whenever I go out. I simply cannot function if my blood sugar is low, and it can drop quite suddenly. The same goes for accepting that I'm a slow eater. I need to chew my food well. I still have some shame around it, but it has gotten better. It's just that the world is not built for people like me, and there are days when every little inconvenience reminds me of that. I continue to assure myself that I'm not the problem and there are people who love me as I am 🙏 It's so weird that I have carried this shame my whole life, needing food and being slow is literally just HUMAN.
Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts and I agree about accepting yourself as you are, and doing the things that you need to feel good :) There's absolutely no problem there. Take care my friend!
I'm sensitive to a lot of horror related things and dark stories. I have trauma and my comfort zone is watching kids movies and kids shows. I've been told a lot of bad things, someone even called me a groomer for having an instagram profile full of children's cartoons because I'm 20. I don't fit in with the other people my age wh go out and party, I fit in more with the people my age or younger who sit at hoe and watch cartoons. There is nothing wrong with me, other than I'm recovering from trauma. I don't have a job at the moment but I want to be a children's book author and comic artist.
Thankfully for me I'm only fifteen and discovered this year that I'm a HSP.. I used to have awful anxiety but I am so much better now! There's still much to work through but now I actually understand myself! EDIT: I literally feel so DRAINED after school each day that all I want to do is sleep and it takes a couple hours to feel myself again
I dedicate an hour a day just to wrap myself up in a blanket in the dark and listen to comforting songs (or just use sound blocking headphones ). It helps me cope
Omg!!! You have hit the nail on the head. Today....52 years old...have the understanding of myself. I've been a mess for years,; feeling guilty or out-of-place for years... Just bought the book for my Kindle. Looking forward to reading it. Ty
Thanks so much for sharing Tracy, I'm so happy my video gave you some understanding and clarity. I hope you'll enjoy the book as much as I did, but I'm pretty sure you will :) Take care and have a nice day!
I am not fully HS but what is interesting for me, I started to be much more sensitive and introvert in my 34. Crowded events, sleeping over out of my home, small talks..started to be so much draining! I definitely need and enjoy time alone...
I found many of the things you said I've been doing them all along, many not even aware it was because of this. I would also add to your video that "recharging" doesn't mean watching Netflix, which I agree with 100%, because recharging for us means doing something that allows us to stop receiving inputs from outside. For example painting, writing, meditating, having a bath with slow music or none, anything creative from DIY to building furniture, etc. where the inputs come from within and so our self can either rest or express itself without pressure.
Thanks, I did not find out until someone recommended “The Highly Sensitive Person”. It was such a relief to know I was not defective and planning ahead does really help.
Thanks so much Vera. I am an INFP and HSP and am in the middle of some horrible discussions with a company I’m dealing with, so very depleted. It is good to be reminded of our community of separate people 🙂
Hi Judith, thank you for sharing your thoughts. I'm sorry to hear you're going through a tough time with your work, I can imagine it must be a lot to deal with. Take care and take lots of self care breaks!
my biggest problem in starting to set boundaries, is that people around me dont respect them. Make fun of me and such. Also Ive been brought up with a big sense of not having any "rights" to want "special treatments" its extremely hard to even begin. I need to avoid conflicts, I feel
Thank you so much for bringing more attention to highly sensitive people. I just discovered that book a year ago and found it life changing. I'm much more able to accept myself now. About time, huh? I'm 65! lol
this is such a good help for me because i have hypersensitivity and sometimes it can be hard to deal with it because you have a lot of emotions and stress and prefer to not have loud noises around me and be drained by people
For years I have done the planning ahead strategy and people shamed me for it, since, essentially, ''the need for it is a flaw I need to fix.'' Similarly, I'm incredibly sensitive to violence/pain/sadness so I avoid media with it, and people tell me it's not healthy to avoid, and that I need to work on getting over it. But you reiterating that all of this is okay is really helpful. Thank you for this video
You're very welcome Emily, I'm sorry people have told you these things. If you haven't already and you're able to get it somewhere (or borrow it), I recommend reading The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron, if you want to understand high sensitivity better and feel more empowered :) I thought it was absolutely wonderful.
I’m 65 years old and have struggled with the judgement of others for my sensitivity and also for the strategies required to cope well. It’s a trap because when those strategies aren’t in play, my ability to function optimally is hampered and the negative cycle of judgment and reaction is perpetuated. Your information is invaluable and I thank you for it.
I stumbled upon this video and related to it, hard. I'm a guy, and in my family I was known as the sensitive one. My parents just didn't understand why I was so scared of the dark or why I would have breakdowns. It continued to affect my relationships, platonic and romantic. As I've gotten older and matured, I've managed to do what you said; made things more comfortable for myself. Thank you so much for this video. And a shoutout to all the sensitive men out there who don't quite feel like they belong!
I never noticed that high intensity forms of exercises aren't for everyone. I only thought I wasn't able to do them because I'm not strong enough. Buuut this video made me learn so much about myself. I'll do the gentle ones next time. Thank youu!!❤
A few years ago I would have been nodding my head agreeing with everything. Now though, I know that a lot of those symptoms that I exhibit that are similar to the ones you listed happens because I am autistic. That diagnosis changed my outlook of all the things that made me look weird to others and now makes me look normal and explainable.
I'm very sensitive and at a very challenging time in my life someone close to me said I was weak. Once again my self esteem was hit. Turns out I was very strong and just a sensitive person. I didn't have the understanding of this to explain myself. Sometimes if you are considered to have a weakness people take advantage of this in not a very nice way. I'm much older now and have learned how to set boundaries and understand there are gifts that come with being sensitive.
I always thought there was something wrong with me because I was highly sensitive and empathetic. I have gotten a lot of unwanted advice and criticism, told to toughen up, to not be so sensitive,etc. It is only now, at 64 years old, after seeing this video, that I realized for the first time, that my sensitivity is not something I need to change or fix. I thank you so much for this understanding, supportive and helpful video. This is exactly what I have needed for a very long time. Although I may be seen as weak by others, I have incredible inner strength. In short, your video inspires me to be myself and accept myself as I am.
Okay so the first tip shook me to my core, I already do that and yes my friends and family make fun of me too like 'oh do you have ___ in your backpack too?' but yes I do feel more comfortable and safe knowing that I have everything I -could- need.
As a sensitive person Iv also found myself as a people pleaser, so much to the point I will inconvenience myself to help someone through a hard time regardless of it making myself happy. I just feel a duty to help. My mom has been helpful with this as she is the same. She's told me how I need to pull back a bit and make sure I'm taking care of myself before I help others, so I don't drain myself in the process. You can compare it to putting your own oxygen mask on when the plain is going down, before you help your neighbor with theirs. I also struggle with crowds.because of this shopping gives me anxiety 😝 and I love alone time, I'm a big one body ❤️
Thanks for sharing your experiences Cecily! I think it's great you want to help others, and that you found out that you sometimes cross your own boundaries when doing so. Recognizing is the first step :) It's really nice that your mom is helping you out with this as well. :) Take care!
i did not find this video, this video found me. by coincidence, i'm also an infj. i've always thought that i am *too* sensitive, so coming across this video is really comforting.
When my personality developed in grade school, I had to block my intuition because I was overly sensitive. It has been a lifelong problem, with untold cost. I sincerely thank God that a very special person recently began teaching me to hear, to speak, and to dance.
Great video! From your calm vocal delivery to the images, graphics, and type faces you used! As an INFJ I have struggled with my sensitivity over the years. Everything you identified in the video are helpful and insightful! I worded 30 years at an automotive company and 15 years in a small marketing company. I just retired and now will focus on myself. It is time to put myself first! Thank you for making this video!
Vera, this was such a good video. I identified with all your points. It’s good to know what we can tolerate and what upsets us. Crowds, scary films, animal cruelty, not enough alone time all drain me. Thanks for another great video!
Thank you for the loving care and kindness in this video. It's very easy to forget how unproductive pretending to be non-sensitive can be in a world where grind/hustle culture is worshipped. This video was filled with sweet and affirming reminders that my life/time/effort isn't worthless just because I need more rest and accommodations in between bursts of activity/productivity.
At 58, I'm finally not ashamed or embarrassed to be called "sensitive". I embrace my HSP traits today. Thank you for the reminder and for all your content. Much love 💘
Thank you 💕 I’ve been down on myself lately for carrying so much in my bag, thinking I’m too materialistic. Now I realize all the items I pack help me to feel comfortable and stay in a positive head space when I’m out of the house.
Absolutely great tips. I always go shopping early in the morning when very few people are there, I avoid loud and crowded places and I always go to sleep and wake up at the same hours. Sometimes this is seen as weird, but I learnt how not to pay attention to other people’s opinion, although sometimes I still feel like I am a bit strange 😕😊❤️❤️
I often remind myself "We can't even agree on how to prepare our breakfast or tie our shoes... So why would there be the one perfect lifestyle for everybody?" It helped me to accept who I am instead pf comparing myself to others I am sensitive, I get overstimulated easily... So what? Who said, that this is not normal? Maybe we are the normal ones and the others are the weird ones? This video gave me confirmation and more help to just... be me Work with who I am and not who I seemingly have to be
"so whether you consider yourself to be a highly sensitive person, an empath, an introvert, an infj.." i am literally all of those. life is pretty hard sometimes
Also doing seemingly dull things as a serious hobby, like doing the same jigsaws over and over again calms me down, helps me relax and brightens my mood. It is a sort of way if making sense on a very low scale of all the scattered bits of information floating around in my head.
Wow! This really spoke to me. It all makes sense now. Been sensitive person since I've been little and now into my sixties. Every bit of that rang true for me. Now I know what I can do to help with my energy.
when growing up, my parents always told me, "stop being sensitive" or "stop crying" or "stop crying or i'll give you a real reason to." and because of that, in my life, and even now, i questioned, what was wrong with me? why am i sensitive? im not normal. ect ect. and then i always surpressed my emotions. and everytime i cry, get angry or sad, i beat myself up for it and tell myself that i shouldnt feel this way and theres something wrong with me. i then told my self that i didnt want to have emotions anymore and that i didnt need them. it got worse but, now im trying to push through and refresh my mindset. its probably going to take away, trail and error, but ill try. thank you for this video
Thank you for your videos. I am 31 years old man and I still do have really hard time in accepting myself as I am. My natural introversion, singledom and sensitivity. Your videos are really helpful for me and I always do learn a lot from them. Keep them coming :D. Thanks and have nice day.
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts! I can imagine being a highly sensitive man can have its own challenges. Actually, the male/female ratio in HSPs is 50/50, so you're definitely not the only one :) Take care!
I am highly sensitive and I also thought for a long time that there was something wrong with me, I know the "tips". Thank you, your video is very helpful. I try to practice selfcare now. 😊
Wow I just saw this video randomly and it is life changing. Thank you so much for this video. All my life, I always wonder what wrong with me. I tend to overthink everything, I have an over active conscience, and I am always so easily depress and stress from everyday thing. I was always trying to fix myself. Didn;t realize I was just HSP and it ok to take thing personally. All the thing you mention really touch me. I think I realize I was HSP when I was 11 but I never knew. I was crying when my teacher yell at me cuz I didn;t get the step. I was like why am I such a cry baby? Always crying at everything. I am so weak, I need to be stronger etc and over the years I try not to cry so much, be stronger etc. Nice to know now at 30 I am a normal person. I need to stop fixing myself. Take time for myself. Make myself comfortable.
Feels wonderful to be understanding. You made me smile at life today. Even i already know all taht you said it reminds me that i'm not alone ... Thanks
I don't leave comments on videos often; but this video helped me so much. I've been feeling down quite a bit in the last few weeks and now I see the problem with my routine. Thank you so much for these tips. Hope you feel amazing every moment of everyday.
I love the point you made about exercise. It seems like such a common trend to work out for hours and to do the things that will burn the most calories. When in reality, I have also tried to do these super intense workouts just to feel burnt out afterward. I am also more likely to stay CONSISTENT with a gentle yet effective workout.
Exactly! :) Much better to be consistent with gentle yet effective workouts, than to go all out every once in a while and then needing a week to recover from it :)
I'm a 29 year old male. I didn't realize I was sensitive until I was 16. It took me over a decade to find all these things out for myself. The biggest part of it was realizing that I wasn't like everyone else and didn't have to be like everyone else. When I finally accepted my sensitivity and allowed myself to look after myself (even if it was different from all my friends), I finally arrived home. If only I had seen this video years ago. Very accurate stuff!
Your presence and smile are so soothing and comforting. Watching your videos and hearing you speak is therapeutic in its own right. Thank you for being who you are.
You're very welcome Deborah, and if you ever want to read more about it, I recommend The highly sensitive person by Elaine Aron. It's a very comforting and reassuring read, and of course informative :)
This was so healing, thank you. I'm sick of people's advice being "just pull yourself together" when it's just not that easy! What's confusing for me is I would say I'm an extrovert in many ways: I love meeting new people, doing new things and connecting with others. However I feel completely drained after social situations - it can take me days to recover. And when I'm exhausted I get panic attacks and have emotional outbursts. It's sometimes just too much. I feel like I'm sometimes caught between two sides of myself - I'm either lonely or overwhelmed 🙃
I feel the exact same!! I love talking to people, entertaining people and joking around. I can also easily connect to most people. But afterwards I often feel so, so tired and drained. It doesn't make much sense... it's probably the tuning into others' feelings and interest that, on the one hand, feels stimulating and exciting for us but then is actually exhausting us subconsciously. My thoughts on this topic...
OMG, tha backpack!! 😀😆 I am 53 and have just discovered by accident that I am HSP. At the mo I am just reading and listening and learning. Thanks so much for your videos, so eye opening that it makes me well up listening as I am so touched by the similarities ❤️ Xx
