Addiction: Nicole Shaver  

Thank you for sharing your story!

@@AtMyHappyPlace thank you so much for your kind words. It's been a long road, but such a glorious one. 💕

Nicole - I want to thank you from the bottom Of my heart for being so open and raw with your story. As you were telling your story I felt I was right there with you. Your passion, Love and faith in God is so powerful. I am so unbelievably happy that you are living a happy and fulfilling life. I too live in California. I recently reached out to my family who I had thought I was extremely close with for help to get into a rehab due to drugs. I have had my entire family turn their backs on me as if I am worthless and am only bringing them shame and embarrassment . I am nothing but a problem they would rather not think about. I was a highly successful respected person in both family and career and unfortunately made a bad choice which in the blink of an eye has turned my life upside down and the only thing I wanted was to disappear. None of my family has reached out to me to see if I am dead or alive. And I know that this is my fault and nobody else’s they don’t owe me anything. Many years ago I helped my youngest sister through a similar addiction issue and her issue was also tangled up with the law and child protective services. I checked on her everyday and was there by her side giving emotional and financial support for years . She never really addressed the matter in its entirety just sort of out on a show to pacify our parents who bought it all. My parents allowed her to live in their home no issues for the past 20 years. I am not her judge nor jury and she has only to answer to her conscience and God. This is why I was absolutely shocked at the response I received when I desperately reached out for help. And mind you it took a lot for me to reach out. I pleaded with my sisters that I felt as though the devil was in an all out war battling for my soul. I have had had a lot of childhood trauma which never has been addressed which I now know is at the center of my addictions and self destructive actions. I was typically one to scoff at people who had an “epiphany”that some terrible things happened to them as a child but I know that it absolutely happens and this if your brains way of protecting you from things you can’t quite handle or understand that would otherwise might shatter a fragile developing mind. I describe it as if there is a red brick door in my memory banks that refuses to open all the way. I get only a few glimpses of what I am trying to remember only to have the door slam shut in my face. I have very very few memories of my childhood. I can only recall memories starting from the age of 8. And I vaguely know why but not everything and that is self preservation. I’m sorry to have rambled on and on but I wanted to let you know I am so happy that you are living a life to be proud of and that your faith in God is so strong. God Bless bless you for touching my heart and thank you again for so openly and honestly sharing your story. You are an inspiration.

Thank you so much ❤️

Sorry I didn’t see this, but thank you and congrats!!!! Please share your story😍

Thank you so much for listening it's not easy to open up about our demons but it's for the greater good. God has worked in my life it would be selfish not to share that with the world. God bless you, he is working in you as well. Always remain faithful even on the hard days ❤️🙏

Thank you so much. God is Great🙏 all the time ❤️

Thank you 🥰🙏

Love you sissy thank you for listening 💕

Thank you for listening it's much appreciated. God bless ❤️

Stay safe friend.

Tony, cry out to God. Ask Him to reveal Himself to you. You want out or you wouldn’t be watching. One step at a time. With God, you can be free to be loved. ❤

Awww thank you I appreciate you as well ❤️

1@@nicoleshaver8934

Meant to say thank you for this also. It meant a lot to me

You can do it!!!! I know you can