Advice to my middle school self - Q&A about insecurities 

Takes a lot to publicize your insecurities but in the end it helps other people as well, including me, so thank you Amber. We love you so much 🥺🌸💖

this is EXACTLY what the younger generation needs. thank you 👏🏽

virtual hug @12:50 🥺thanks for opening up to us about these difficult topics

im biracial too and it's just so hard to fit in sometimes, but knowing that you are finding people and feeling more connected, gives me hope for myself :') thank you, amber! ily

AWH AMBER DON’T CRY ♥️ i asked the question abt undesirability as a poc and what you said genuinely made something click. i’m a freshman in college and was heavily considering transferring to a more diverse place out of my comfort zone and this helped me realize that finding more ppl who share similar experiences is something that excites me. thank you amber

Didn’t think I’d be crying watching this and how much I could relate. Thank you for being open and awesome

YES MAKE THIS A SERIES PLEASE - this video was needed (been going thru it :,)) and i love how these experiences are so unique yet universal its crazy ily amber u slay always

as a skinny person i always thought that eating a lot of junk would get me bigger, but although that is true, this video made me realize how unhealthy it could be for me internally and externally

i’m wasian too and i related so much with dealing with being asian and white. but finding people that support you helps sm with fitting in pls don’t cry you are beautiful amber ❤

love you, amber!! at first i started seeing your videos bc of your sister (i hate saying that 😭) but throughout the years i actually feel a lot more connected to you. you are so fun and so so real + so pretty. i know making this video must have taken a lot of courage from you. it's okay to be shy, you are still so cool and i'd love to have a friend like you. sending you hugs and love from peru

as a little filipina college freshman, i understand the feeling of thinking you may be undesirable just because you look different and are the "asian girl" in a community of white people. oh my goodness the more you speak, the more you explain your experiences i just relate to you so much. thank you so much for sharing and letting all of us find each other, realizing how we aren't alone. dude i love you. and fr being in a loving relationship is insane.

it was the same thing for my sister and I. my friends would eventually become her friends and it would end up making me feel alone. it changed my mindset into thinking "wow everyone loves my sister" which made me into a very jealous type for everything 😭

12:10 has me SOBBING. omg just being a POC in a majority white school it hits so hard. My confidence and self love is so drastically different and better now but the flashbacks of those times, being so YOUNG, and truly believing I was ugly because of the evnoirment I was around, really just brought me to tears. ily amber ty for making this video

bro the shy younger sister/confident older sister dynamic has haunted me. i’ve had to really overcome my jealousy and view us both as individuals with different skillsets and experiences. i really appreciate your honesty

love sm thank u for this so glad to have someone to relate to so sorry we both have had to go through this but i’m glad we can improve from it

as a junior in college who is also going through daily epiphanies and self reflections about how i treated myself when i was younger, this video hit hard 🥲

Honestly, these videos where you can hear about some painful experiences that people you admire have suffered are the best, you are not seeing that person who shows you beautiful things, you are seeing their soul speak to you and that gives you such great comfort. Knowing that they have gone through so much pain but that little by little they advance and overcome their fears. My respect for you and your sister is huge, they give my days an inexplicable happiness and I always wish you only the best. Thank you for opening your soul to us, we love you. I send you lots of hugs from Costa Rica 🇨🇷

As a mexican growing up in a white community I feel so understood by what you said. I never really knew how to express this insecurity and I’m so glad I’m not alone, thank you for sharing

I relate so much, as someone who also has an older sister (who i love so much and owe alot to) who was naturally good with people and center of attention and me who was younger, extremely introverted, and also had a bad relationship with food. Man I never felt so seen and understood. Sending everyone love!!

so proud of the person you have become amber💗 the vulnerability you gave is so special and helpful

you are so real for this amber i love you and thank you for being vulnerable with us

it's so cool to hear how much you've grown Amber and I love that you're sharing your personal experience about topics that might not be talked about often and spreading confidence energy!! thank you for being you!

Really glad you made this video, I really felt you when you were talking about social anxiety cause I’m the same way, hopefully I’ll learn to not care about it soon like you managed to do!

Your videos always make me feel happy and motivated afterwards 💛

wow I relate so much. I literally had the biggest phobia of eating food at school. I would just sit there and watch my friends eat then binge at home :/. It’s really sad how young an eating disorder can develop. It started for me when I was in 3rd grade I tried starving myself to be as skinny as my older sisters and friends. Luckily now I have a better relationship with food.

thank you so much amber for sharing this, it made me feel so valued and understood

Gosh. One of my favorite videos you’ve ever made. I don’t think any amount of thank you’s will ever show how much of an impact your videos and knowing I’m not alone struggling in this world being half Asian have on me, growing up in such a predominantly white town had it’s pros and cons; but the one thing that always had me isolated from everyone else was not having the average blonde hair, blue eyes combo, and the racism that came along with it. I felt like such an outsider not being able to fit in. As a kid I hated the way I looked because I thought I wasn’t beautiful enough to have someone or good enough. The way our experiences pave the way for us and as we look back on them shape us to the people we are, im entirely grateful. Thank you ambs :(

thank you so much amber for posting this video! this definitely has opened my eyes about myself.. you are so inspirational! ❤️

amber you are literally an angel for being so open and vulnerable!! this was so relatable and sad at the same time!!💔

Thank you for shining light on this!! Had a similar experience growing up! Sending you a virtual hug!!! You’re amazing bestie stay safe & gorg 🥹!! & Happy holidays 💛💛!!

the social anxiety thing resonates with me so much. It’s nice to see someone who felt the same way that I do and is now living her best life

A big HECK YES to this video!!! For someone that you are right now and someone that you are going to be in the future, be proud and celebrate who you are today, tomorrow and for the days to come. So much love for you all :))

I’m so happy I found your channel, you have such a nice mentality and way of thinking about life, it definitely changed my mentality in the best way

amber i am so proud of you for being willing to post about your insecurities, i wanted to say i really love you and you are one of my comfort people and everytime i see that you post i’m so happy, i know its hard to be compared to your older sister, but that doesn’t take away from who you are as a person, i really appreciate who you are and what you do, i’m so grateful for you and im happy you decided to join youtube, i also wanted to say i think you’re so beautiful and so funny and so wonderful and you are so great just as you are, im glad you’ve gotten better about feeling that way and im not great at communicating but im just grateful for you regardless of how you look and how you feel mentally, i think you are wonderful

I can totally relate to so many things you mentioned. I just want you to know that this video helps us a lot that it reminds us that we are not alone. Thanks Amber.

sending the biggest hug to the younger Amber and sending the one to Amber from now. this was hella emotional to me, thank you for being courageous to share your experience and spreading the positive messages

it feels like we literally lived the same life! This was so validating. Thank you

thank you for opening up. this felt very candid and I really enjoyed this

This was my favorite video amber ❤ thank you for being so vulnerable with us we love you ❤

make this a series. this video was so helpful and honestly just good to hear from you. you made really complicated feelings and experiences easy to understand and normalize. when your school aged, things can be heavy and feel like an ambiguous darkness. you’re such a light just in how to teach us that insecurities are things we are able to have better relationships with as we live our human experiences. we have to give our selves a day at a time. well said! much love!

You're so wonderful and we love you so much ♡ thank you for being vulnerable, this helped me so much xx

I LOVE YOU AMBER, you’re an amazing gall and a great influence

love these types of videos! you are so insightful and brave. i’m so glad to find someone who i can relate to xx

great video amber💯 only halfway thru it and I already feel so much enlightened & positive💗, couldn't fight the urge to comment. love it queen, preachh!!

slay amber this was probably my favourite video of yours thank you for being so open🥰

Please make this is a series. Loved this video Amber!

really related to when u were talking about knowing guys wouldn’t like me back bc i am poc…it was hard but now it’s gotten a lot better and i’m really happy with my skin😌 glad u are too amber

thank you for speaking on these subjects! it takes a lot of strength.

not amber making me cry :,) im so proud of you! i would definitely love to see this become a series, i need more of big sister amber!! much love

Thanks for being honest Amber, you're so brave and we all admire that. It takes a lot of courage to upload this kind of video, let alone record it. Great job Amber!

This video is really comforting amber, we need this more ❤️

i feel so incredibly seen by this and the topics you’re discussing! you truly inspire me to become who i aspire to be amber!

This whole video got me feeling emotional and the subjects you talked about made me think how I use to do the same thing, maturing is definitely figuring out how to be your true self

Amber thank you for being so honest and candid. I went to school on the East Coast in high school at a boarding school. I’m from an Indigenous reservation and also POC. I ventured out to earn a solid education away from home. Omg, I never felt so alone at that time, questioning where I fit into the world. It was the loneliest struggle where I cried so many nights and had no one back home to confide in. I struggled with meeting beauty standards and was often the center of Native American stereotypes. It took a lot of prayer, taking risks and being true to my style, my culture, my features and my spirit to take me to a place where I feel at peace and content. It was an arduous journey but I’m glad I learned a lot along the way about myself. There’s still so much to accept and learn ❤ as I get older I realize I wanna keep doing this for myself, because I want to make a place in this world for others to see & feel beauty in. I see that in you. I watch you and feel comfortable and happy because of who you are & what you’re about.

i love you so much amber you don’t have an idea, thank u so much for just opening up with us and sharing ur throughs and opinions 🫶🏼

This actually helped me a lot. I wasn’t having a very great day and this really cheered me up.😊 Thank you! I hope you make more videos like this in the future!😊❤

You and Ashley are so healing to listen to.

I struggle with the same thing, this video is just what i needed right now and it inspired me a lot. As welI as I appreciate you for being open and vulnerable about your insecurities. gosh! i love you so much, Amber! ♡

Oh my goodness this was so so good !! You literally hit so many awesome points and grew huge from every negative that tried to come against you in such a positive outcome !! It’s incredible !! This vid should be played in every middle school and high school - that u can get through this and grow through this thing called life !! You are literally amazing and wise and I am a mom and u also encouraged me because after having four children u can sometimes get way to into your body image and foods but it’s so true to literally not let diets and body image consume you !! It seems to make it harder and worse even for yourself and your mind etc . Anyhow !! You are amazinggggg and so real and so genuine 💟 which equals one beautiful person 🌸

This made me tear up because I felt the exact same way growing up as one of the only asian girls in my Elementary school. I was called Mulan and ugly. Boys didn’t want anything to do with me and girls didn’t want to to be my friend or they would bully me into doing things. It still makes me cry till this day when I think about it long enough. But I will say these experiences have really taught me to have tough skin and love yourself. I really appreciate this video and Amber opening up to the world about this. Thank you ❤

it’s so healing to hear your perspective on these things amber! growth takes time for sure and we’re all doing it gradually every day… one step at a time to love ourselves and our bodies 💓🤧

I'm literally crying with you. Thank you for your words amber!

You’re a such a beautiful person, Amber. Thank you for your vulnerability ❤

DAMN, this is such a great video!! I was a POC growing up in a white suburb as well, I really felt it when you shared your experience!! Your honesty and realness make you 10 times more beautiful!! It's hard to find real people like you these days! Keep being you!💛

I'm so proud of you for sharing all these experiences, but also wanna say thank you cause I really feel safe in this channel and you're one of my fav youtubers, you're literally so sweet and kind

This video felt so comforting :') thank you for sharing your experiences and thoughts Amber!!

Thank you for opening up about this Amber

amber i think this is one of my favorite video of yours, just you being able to talk about all of this now just show how strong and like happy you are now and im so happy for you !! i am so so proud of you !!

Such a beautiful video amber genuinwly thank you 🥲🥲I really loved and agreed with all of your thoughts and I think you are super remarkable!! Thank you for going out of your way to make this video. I am so excited to see you grow

Your thoughts and reflections are so meaningful. Will always have a fond love for your witty and down to earth dialogue! Thank you for sharing, Amber!!

Thankyou for all your beautiful knowledge and wisdom! Some of your struggles really resonate with me and I’m so grateful to have someone to show the positive sides of life and how to overcome the hard times

Amber, I recently discovered you and you've honestly brightened up my stressful days! all I can say is thank you and keep going because you're doing great! ily ❤

Honestly Amber, I have for probably a whole decade struggled with the way I view myself and my abilities. I‘ve taken myself apart mentally to only small fragments of myself remaining and through therapy and just generally growing older and putting one and one together, I‘ve been building myself up. I‘m still not anywhere of a build up I would want to be at, but certain things you said, I was able to accept and process. Acceptance is very hard but maybe acknowledging your words made me realise, that in fact, I am walking the way of reaching a self I am feeling comfortable with! Thank you for being so open. I believe it’s one of our generations biggest strengths to voice our problems!

Already only a few minutes in and I feel so heard and understood! It’s so so difficult to create a healthy relationship with food after viewing it negatively. Thank you!!

Thank you for being vulnerable. This video is so relatable and down-to-the-earth. You speak up for all the chubby kids who experience disordered eating behaviors and the PTSD last for the rest of our lives... Thanks again for being positive!!

Hey Amber, I'm a new subscriber and I have to admit that I'm completely obsessed with your videos. Over the past month, I've binged a massive number of your videos. They have given me lots of comfort and warmth, especially when I'm feeling down and lonely. It was so interesting to hear you talk about your insecurities because usually people on the internet like to portray the nicer aspects of their life and nobody really talks about things like body issues or comparing oneself to one's older sibling, not feeling feminine enough, etc. It was so so so relatable and I felt so much better after watching this video. Even though I'm the same age as you, I am still dealing with some of the issues you mentioned and I feel really bad about myself. Hearing you talk through the ways you dealt with everything is really helpful! Thank you so much! Lots of love ❣

This video helped me so much, I haven’t been doing well mentally so this really helped me see things in a better perspective. Thank you

BRB crying rn I love u n love seeing u open up and would love more videos like this. Related with a lot of this especially the social anxiety thing liiike all throughout school I was like shy person in the corner n had few select friends and people would always ask if I knew how to talk and get red faced as hell if I had to speak in front of people (still do tbh just not as bad) Glad to know I’m not the only one who went through that 💜💜💜

I legitimately loveee u omgg>.< We come from different backgrounds and experiences but i related to a lot u have said. We’re all humans living in our own bubbles, but definitely growing up and learning from what we’ve gone through definitely paves a new path for what we can do now as adults, or just new versions of ourselves. We’re the same age but i feel like if younger me saw this i would’ve definitely not made the mistakes i did as a kid/teen. Some are literal anxieties i can’t take back but i could’ve definitely learned new insight on how to cope with it and not restrain myself with. It’s honestly crazyyy we’re people who never met before and live different lives but how easily i connected with u and ur mindset is pretty cool. I’d definitely be superr anxious if i met u in person but just know i’d absolutely lovee it

You always come across as so confident and ballsy. Thanks for sharing the other side ❤

omg i love you amber youre such an amazing human being im very glad that you exist and im just very grateful for the video u just made

I rarely comment, but I just wanted to say that this video really resonated with me. I’m a medical student in my mid-twenties now and have finally gained the confidence I had been looking for since elementary school, but I wish I had come across videos like this when I was a kid. It would’ve sped up that confidence building process. Thanks for sharing with us. ❤

I love this so much!! Everything you said was definitely what I needed to hear when I was younger. As a poc in an all white area I was treated as an undesirable but today I am SO happy that I am the way God made me❤️

it's so important that stories like these are heard. amber couldn't have put it in a better way when she explained her turbulent relationship with food. it was like listening to someone retell my story. seeing her now, and how much she grew from it, it can show someone out there that there is a way to heal. i didn't feel heard or related to at all during that phase in my life, and amber simply telling her story feels so validating. :) 👍

Thank you for talking about these topics, I know it’s hard for myself to talk about this with people I know but seeing you be so open about it with all of us is so inspiring. Love you Amber!!

I would love to see this becoming a series of videos, but I don't want to see you cry, it makes me cry ! ❤

when you answered the question about feeling undesirable, especially as a POC, my younger self could not relate more. i’m half hispanic and grew up in a super small, very white town. i remember idolizing my white, blonde friends because they were referred to as pretty way more often than i was. i truly just hope that the next generation of POC recognize and appreciate their beauty before reaching adulthood/college. i’m so sorry that you had to go through what you did, and i hope it helps to know you were not and are not alone. thank you for reminding me of the same

wow, I just have to say... I haven't seen any influencer talk about the struggles of being poc and feeling undesirable, so it truly means SO SO much to hear you talking about a topic like this and being so understanding and uplifting. I've struggled and have been struggling with this feeling for so long and it really does feel like no one will ever look at me sometimes. Even today, my friend (white girl with dirty blonde hair/conventionally attractive) told me that the guy i had a crush on (white male) tried asking her out. I felt so defeated and guilty in that moment because I wanted to feel happy for my friend, but all I felt was sadness and pity for myself. I hated it. I agree that putting yourself in an environment with people of similar backgrounds helps. I definitely believe that I feel more comfortable and wanted when I'm around my poc friends compared to my white friends. Thank you again, Amber, for filming this video!! much love to you and i wish you the best

This is painfully so relatable.... I LUV you Amber. Thank you.

i really truly needed this video. it takes a lot of courage to open up, vocalise all these insecurities and post this, so thank you it truly helped me. I realized I relate to you on such a deep level on some of these. & I really want to make it clear that you may be ashley's sister but we're all here for YOU. thank u for this video seriously.

i’m a little older than u/ about the same age as ashley and i just have to say every piece of advice u gave was so relatable & spot on! you seem very intelligent and thoughtful and i’m glad ur viewers have someone to give them such great advice!

aw amber thank you so much for sharing. the bit about body and food and your 6 year struggle hit me so hard. for me it was like a part of myself that eclipsed all else. part of my brain was never not occupied with thoughts of, what i wished i looked like, what i will allow myself to eat in the next meal. like you said, i didn't know how to eat anymore. now i understand having a knowledgeable relationship with food guided by instinct is the most important thing. your experience also made me relate so much because this isn't something people could tell just by looking at you - you're so beautiful and super funny. great personality. so it just speaks to how hidden, alone and secretive food/ body struggles can be. never imagined I could share these words with you. grateful for you 💗

Loved the video so much! Felt like a nice chatting podcast! It would be really cool if you made this into a sort of series, or even like a podcast, i guess

amber this is my favorite video youve ever done!!!! i related to so much of what you were talking about,, and it's really rare to hear someone put it into words so honestly and i can't thank you enough for taking the time to share this :') we love u

this is so real and refreshing, thank you so much for this video and I hope you realize how beautiful you are inside & out

AMBERRRR! Thank you so much for being an amazing human :’). Literally cried in your video because of the connection i felt. Def would love a series !!

This sister, this best friend, this lovely happy human being i never had ! Thank you for being all of these and so much more ❤️ Do More videos Like this!😊✨

dang that last part resonated so hard with me. growing up with undiagnosed social anxiety/avpd/autism, school was SO hard for me. i literally didn't/couldn't talk to anyone. people didn't like me for acting autistic, which reinforced the avpd/social anxiety, which made it even harder to interact with others, and so on and so forth. it was a never ending cycle. i felt paralyzed with shame and unrelenting feelings of inferiority. which i still do to this day. just gotta remember to tell myself that it's a trauma response, and to not beat myself up too much about it afterwards. there is nothing shameful about feeling shame.

Thank you so much for sharing! I’m Asian and have a fabulous sister who’s also my best friend, and I’ve felt the same way. It’s encouraging to know none of us are really alone.

ur ltr such a warm soul. i was having such a rough day today w my body and just eating too much, n u just helped me slow down and appreciate myself. it helped me to ltr just clean my whole living room and enjoy a plate of food w out my phone. i appreciate ur vulnerability sm bc it helped me be real w myself. you are the sweetest person ever, thank u SOOO MUCH for being public w how u feel cause it helped me so much. ily ily ily!! 😭