An Agonizing Decision: Walking Away From Our Toxic "Twin Flame" 

It understand. It truly is. We see their inner child so clearly in these "twin flame" connections. We know what they've endured, we know their wounds and pain. "Abandoning" them feels wrong in our minds at the time. Also, we just cannot comprehend a life without them in it in some capacity. Although they are toxic and dangerous, that trauma bond causes us to feel as though we are grieving the death of someone who is still alive. It can take a long time to heal. However, I knew early on after I went through with it that I would never allow that person in my energy again. It just was not an option. I'm sorry for the pain you've experienced. But you are stronger now because of it. Hugs to you.

@@Twinflamedeception you describe it exactly like I felt. It does feel like a death and you don’t want to completely let go. I tried being friends but it was still toxic. Now that I’ve put some time between us I’m starting to feel a sense of relief. Thanks for your channel, it has been a great source of comfort for me!

I could not agree more. The twin flame teachings are cleverly disguised to encourage toxic relationship dynamics. It is normalized within that community. I was once heavy under the spell, so I know how difficult it can be to break free. When we don't have an explanation for what is happening to us and within this type of connection, we can become very dependent on those teachings and the community. It's only when we begin to question what we are being told that we can begin to set ourselves free. I am sorry for what you have endured but you are so fortunate to have awakened to the truths. Thank you so much for sharing some of your story - it will help others to do the same. 💗

I’m going to say this…. The notion of having to be traumatized to lean or grow is false too. Think about it! If a teacher was to look at what you are working on and supportingly says… “hey this is how we can get the answer” you will respond with positivity. If the teacher instead harms you with every preconceived idea of what you are doing is not right, you will hate that teacher and not learn anything besides the fact they are cruel. That’s not some spiritual lesson or awakening of anything. It’s simply cruelty to target someone who’s seeking learning. I’m convinced that this is all just evil to destroy people who are actually kind! Furthermore, the greatest wisdom anyone can have is simple! Treat others the way you want to be treated! Period. Then you expand this to every sentient creature. Boom, enlightenment! Everything else is semantics and some avenue of manipulation. It’s not as difficult as many manufactured it to be for the purpose of controlling people

@@Twinflamedeceptionnow imagine if “your teachers” so called “guides” were passed over! You have a near death experience and you can communicate with people who have passed all the time! You begin to HATE IT, because you understand that they can be just as manipulative and selfish as they were in life! That would destroy your entire faith in not just the natural world but your entire outlook on lithe spiritual world! Stripping your faith completely away from goodness and love!

Yes, this is so true. The hoovers do take other forms, including the dreams and mind control. We will also still be bombarded with the fake signs and synchs, which I have found are best to ignore. Thank you for pointing these things out. Prayer is also helpful to me, as well as being extremely protective of my energy. I have not practiced fasting much but perhaps this is something I need to consider more. Thank you, again.

@@Twinflamedeceptionthe concept of psychic Hoovers is new to me and really interesting. What are the forms it can take? Is the psychic Hoover done directly by the “twin”? Or is it done by other forces?

I think it's being done with hidden technology (mind control) and entities operating through the counterpart and ourselves. I believe these psychic links are very real and are forced upon us in this way. Our conscious mind will be well-aware of this but the programming is taking place in our unconscious mind. It is really annoying and even distressing at times. It's best to ignore and continuously retrain our mind to see it all for what it is us. Our thoughts are all we have when it comes to navigating - and surviving - this experience.

Yes, I know exactly what you mean. I think many of us are in a tug of war between the two the entire time, mainly because we are under the influence of the twin flame teachings and choosing to ignore our own intuition. The mind control aspect is very real too. We really are so fortunate to have been given this second chance. So many remain trapped for years, some a lifetime. Others take their own life.. Can't wait for your channel to launch. Hope it's coming together as you'd hoped.

Completely agree with what you are saying here. The mind control aspect is certainly something I've experienced. Really appreciate your encouragement with my channel. It means a lot to me. I had to wait a little bit to be able to talk about it.@@Twinflamedeception

You are not alone. So many are suffering. How fortunate are you to have awakened to the truths about these connections. So glad this helps, and I hope you'll continue to find comfort here. Thanks for listening. 💗

Very little to no readings I've heard over the last 5 years resonated with my situation.. it's not like my situation was different, It's just I was completely honest upfront, and most people in fantasy land couldn't handle it. I ended up on my own through this so-called journey.

I agree, this is not an average trauma bond. These connections consist of actual soul binding, mind control, psychic links, and extreme psychological and emotional abuse and trauma. I appreciate you taking the time to listen and share some of your experience. Wishing you strength as you continue to heal.

Yes, my brother who was 9 years older than me psychically abused me. It wasn’t until he moved out at 18 I was free. Other things happened in between but he did the most damage.

So, what is that energetic frequency? Is it real? Is it connected with the mobile phone in any way? It was a hightend sexual energy and obsession. But I still feel the need to know what made me feel so unbalanced for so long. Work in progress, lol.

Aw, I understand the regret. But that spell is heavy. I truly believe narcissistic abuse is a form of black magic - we are in a fog or spiritual coma while it's happening. It's only when we wake up and get away fully from this person that we begin to understand what is taking place. So glad you've escaped. Thanks for sharing and being here :)

You are so welcome. You're so fortunate that the spell has broken. It is a very long and difficult road of recovery but it's all worth it in the end. You will be positively transformed in many ways. Appreciate you being here and sharing some of your story. 💗

GodBless us All 🙏

I agree that this experience will play on every single one of our deepest wounds and traumas, even the ones we are not consciously aware of. If we are fortunate, we will wake up to them and finally have a chance to truly heal. Thank you for sharing, I appreciate you taking the time to watch and comment.

Hi Christine :) thanks so much. And I am so sorry I have not replied to your last email. How are you doing?

No worries about replying. I'm doing well. Take good care of yourself and keep putting out the videos when you can! I'll send you the link when my channel is up.@@Twinflamedeception

It is very difficult when we can't go no contact with a toxic person. The best course of action is just to stay completely neutral aka unbothered. A toxic person will thrive on conflict and negative attention, so little to no reaction is always best, unless it's necessary to defend yourself or your child. Thanks for being here, hope this helps.

@Twinflamedeception Definitely helps, thank you for responding. ❤️

Sure. I have not been too open about the details of my connection, mainly because my "twin" is here. He reads the comments and watches the videos. I am anonymous here but he has found me. It is also difficult to describe the abuse because it is almost all done covertly, meaning it is hard to pinpoint and identify as outright abuse when we are gaslit by them and told we are perceiving things wrong. Another reason it is difficult to identify is because we are always explaining and justifying everything through the stages of twin flame. I was able to rationalize all of his behaviors because of his own wounds and traumas (he was hurt before, he is damaged) and because I was being taught that this is "how your twin flame will behave" (afraid of the intensity of the connection, hot and cold, runner-chaser, stages that occur, etc...) We are also being bombarded with "signs" and "synchronicities" related to this person. These things will torment us. There are the telepathic messages and song messages, which for me, took over my reality. Our entire world is being manipulated to connect us to this person. Everything becomes supernatural and we have no idea what is going on. We are also watching tarot readings every day that confirm these "signs" and this "divine connection." Many of us are undergoing a psychosis during this time (along with the kundalini awakening), so we are not in our right mind. It is impossible to consider at that time that there is another explanation for what is happening. For this reason, we are willing to tolerate the unthinkable. Also, of course, it would be difficult to list every single thing that occurred in our connection that impacted me negatively. I can try and elaborate on some, though. I came into awareness of all of these things after it was all said and done (I cut off contact with him). At the time, I did not know I was being abused because of the reasons I mention above. We are asleep to narc abuse when it's happening. All we know is something is terribly wrong and we are deeply hurting and very confused. We don't know we are trauma bonded. We don't know we are under a spell. In the beginning, our connection felt magical. He showered me with attention, we were both best friends and lovers (so it seemed). It was unlike anything either of us had experienced. This was the love bombing phase I know now. Then when the devalue phase came (in hindsight), everything changed. He was switched off and he became very dark towards me, only donning his mask when I'd pull away (hindsight). Because he continued to contact me, I thought he had to truly care deep down, he just couldn't express it or show it. He would string me along and lead me to believe that we were always going to see each other again. He would often talk about upcoming trips but they would never happen (he knew how I felt). So I was waiting and waiting and waiting. I once (just once) cried in front of him. He smiled while I cried. And then he ghosted/discarded me. Of course, he would be back. He would give me the silent treatment if I missed his call or didn't reply to his message in a timely manner. He was controlling and possessive, blowing up my phone when he knew I was with friends or family (usually sexual references). He would also give me the silent treatment if I would send him a sexy photo or voice message to make me sit and worry about what he was thinking. (After the initial discard, I did not express my emotions or what I was going through/what he was putting me through, I should mention. I elaborate more on this below.) He was also very thankless of my kindness and efforts, acting as though it was owed to him. He had a very tit-for-tat and keeping score attitude, too paranoid of potentially being over giving towards me and becoming vulnerable. He would convince me I was the problem when I would ever bring up one of his behaviors, even accusing me of entertaining other men, so I was conditioned very early on to never do that and to tolerate everything instead. For this reason, I dropped all boundaries and kept my concerns to myself after the devalue stage set in. When we would be intimate, he would make sure I detected his coldness towards me. But he would then say things to confuse me, talking about how "effortless" our connection was, the insane chemistry we shared, how he craved me, and what a great time we always shared together. On FaceTime, after the devalue stage, he would always direct the camera away from his face and keep it pointed at the wall or at his feet when we would say goodbye after being intimate, purposely degrading me (he knew of the sexual trauma in my past). Our connection was very sexual but he also leaned on me for almost everything. He would often speak to me about his ex and seek advice on this and other aspects of his life. I wanted to show him that I would never abandon him like the others had, that he could trust me and always depend on me, even though I was not receiving the same in return. I saw his inner child so acutely and felt his traumas and wounds as though they were my own, which led to my demise in the end. He kept me a secret and hidden away from everyone in his life. He never wanted anyone to know I existed. He was definitely ashamed of me. I believe this was because I was struggling financially after my divorce, working on building my own business from the ground up (which, ironically, grew to be extremely successful), and I was just not "flashy" enough for him at the time. He was shallow, superficial, and materialistic. Everything was about image to him. There was one time, though, when he cockily shared with me that he disclosed intimate details of one of our sexual encounters at a business dinner with three women (basically bragging about his sexual performance to them). After the love bombing phase was over and the devalue stage set in, it was one repeated hoover and discard after another after that. He would disappear for a week or two at a time and then contact me. This would occur on repeat. He would often criticize me for not doing something he felt I should be doing in my life, such as something regarding improving my self-esteem or career, lacking empathy for my struggles I was facing (newly divorced, at rock bottom, etc...) He would look at me like he was absolutely disgusted by me, but yet couldn't seem to stop obsessing over me and could not stay away from me. I interpreted this as he must care for me, not knowing it was all simply about control for him. I received a "sorry" from him twice the entire time we were in contact. Both times were very weak and disingenuous and were when he feared me walking away. I tried to many times but he would always reel me back in. Holidays were one way he would like to show me how meaningless I was to him. I would be lucky to get a generic text. He would seem to compete with me, even at one point telling me he was starting the same business as me that I had at the time. As much as he was dependent on me and my energy, he would constantly make me feel like I was a distraction and a burden (by telling me I was). When we were on FaceTime and he found out my birthday was the next day, he smiled creepily and said, "oh, your bday is tomorrow?" I never heard a peep from him. Of course, this was to hurt me. Another example, we were on the phone for over two hours before Valentine's Day, plus a sexual FaceTime call. Valentine's Day came and went and there was nothing from him, not a word. I was prepared for this. I vowed to myself I was done this time. Two days later, he called me very concerned, fearing I was walking away. He future-faked about our upcoming visit (which never happened, of course), and I saw his insecurity and wounded inner child and gave in. He always painted himself as the victim in past relationships, telling me sad stories of how he was treated. I truly felt for him. He would constantly tell me kind acts he had done for others, including volunteer work, giving money to strangers, church involvement, always delivering flowers to his ex for every holiday and bday and Mother's Day (his mask). When Mother's Day came around for me, he was silent. When he would disappear for long periods of time and then finally return, he would purposely ghost/disappear during mid-conversation. He would do this usually if he found out I did not seem to be suffering as much as I hoped. He also did this once when I told him my daughter had been seriously injured. He was very sick. He initiated a final discard when he was gifted a new counterpart (he kept her hidden from me). I believe this happens collectively (given a new counterpart) so that we are discarded for the final time, however, they will continue to hoover us. He did not say goodbye to me, he just threw me away, keeping me on sort of a "back burner." For the next several months, he would continue to contact me here and there, but it began to ramp up when he knew I was waking up and beginning to free myself. He detected this psychically (alerted by the entities). He would show up being very nice, wearing the mask he had worn when we first met. He did not want to lose control of me and he made frantic efforts as I broke free. He kept his new supply a secret, of course, not breaking her out in public until it was time for his last ditch effort to try to hurt me and regain control of me (this was right before I went 100% no contact and it did not work bc by then I had woken up to who he was and I was repulsed by him).... I know I am leaving A WHOLE LOT out but these are a few examples. This was not easy to revisit but I hope it helps. I know your own personal struggles with your connection and I hope this doesn't upset you. I will also note that the tables have since turned and he suffers greatly due to his choices. I have forgiven him and wish him only healing and peace, yet I want nothing to do with him ever again. I may delete soon since it is so personal *sorry for typos

Wow. This is very brave, open, and Frank. Thank you.

Thank you, I hope it helps some.

I am sorry, I completely understand how difficult this is. I am still on my healing journey as well. I am so honored you want to speak to me privately about this. I am unable to take any appointments at this time but I hope to have openings soon. I have a major tendency to spread myself too thin, which isn't good for myself or anyone else :/ Helping others through this process is my true passion, so I do hope to be able to devote even more time to this in the future. My sincerest apologies. I am happy to help you here any way I possibly can, though. 💗

thanks for listening. :)

You are very welcome. So glad it is helpful. You are not alone.