anorexia nervosa: how can you help? the do's and don'ts *from someone who's been there* 

thanks so much for all the kindness 🤎 next weeks video is a v exciting vlog style one :) just thought this could help, i love u all

One time I was extremely tempted to relapse on my anorexia and I told one of my friends. She took me to one of my favorite fast food places, if you can call noodles and co. Fast food, and she got the item on the menu with the most calories in it. I had no idea why in the world she wanted something with so many calories so I asked her. She said, “whenever I go out to eat with someone with an ED I always get the item with the most calories to help them know they don’t need to eat something with few calories. And then they won’t feel guilty with getting something with more calories.” This was such a relieving feeling for me that she did this. And helped me realize that calorie count does not define food or weight.

Ro is so smart she's going to be an amazing psychologist/therapist/psychiatrist when she finishes uni. I hope she writes a book about this, very eloquent speaker.

Just because a person is physically better DOESNT mean their mentally better...i felt this in my soul 😢❤️ People need to know this! Especially mental heath professionals! 🖤

Definitely one of the biggest things is to just LISTEN to how an ED sufferer is feeling, even if it doesn’t make sense. EDs don’t make sense. The best thing you can do is educate yourself and do your best to understand

It’d be so neat if you did a video with your mom discussing her involvement in your recovery and how she has supported you. She seems so gentle but also encouraging and consistent with her support. That was something I never had when going through recovery, but I can see how that sort of love and encouragement would be so comforting and helpful when you’re on that journey.

Not all heroes wear capes....you are going to be the BEST psychologist the world has seen Ro, absolutely rooting for you and your journey. You remind me why I choose recovery every single day xxxxx

i always thought i was faking my anorexia but oh my gosh this has helped me see that that’s not the case. i relate to this so much. thank you ro

I've struggled for 11 years and replased this year and this is my first week in recovery and I can't thank you enough for this video. I have shared this with my family because this will help not only myself but them too. ❤️

green is YOUR COLOUR ♥ you are shining like a star x

I hope this gets translated for people with parents that don't speak English, it can be very helpful!

Literally proud of a stranger and it’s weird but I’m not complaining

I don’t have an ED, but I do struggle with OCD/guilt around diet and exercise and this was so kind, accurate and helpful. Thank you for putting this out in the world for those who have never dealt with disordered eating.

Brilliantly made video, I'm a parent of a daughter suffering from anorexia nervosa. I have not always been kind to her when confronted with her problems, it's so difficult to know what to do to support her. Your video has some invaluable comments, thank you so much, I'm taking on board what you say. You are so succinct and get to the core of the illness without waffle. I think I've been doing a few things that haven't been helpful, and one or two things you have suggested that are.

thank you so SO MUCH for this, i’m definitely sending this to my parents as they refuse to listen to me when i try to explain and it doesn’t help that eds and mental health in general are extremely stigmatised in society especially amongst asians, so it’s harder for them to understand when diet culture is basically normalised and drilled into everyday talk

As a person with a loved one with anorexia, I initially thought it was a strange mental illness that I would never relate to or understand. But the more conversations I have had with my loved one, the more I have realised that anorexia shares a lot of similarities with the depression I am suffering with myself. Both likely stem from feelings of low self worth. Both have periods of progression or regression. Some of the points you made are applicable to depression too: - Don’t give up on them (of course) - Be gentle and patient - Acknowledge small victories - Similar to “Just eat”, “Just do the thing” is not helpful and demonstrates a complete lack of understanding of the illness - Similar to commenting on someone with anorexia’s body, “You seem happy today” is not a nice thing to hear and just reminds me that my default is to be depressed - Don’t blame yourself as that guilt will pass on your loved one These are certainly things I have tried to get through to well meaning family over the years. Anyway, I thought I would point this out as it may help people with either illness relate to each other a little better, like it did with myself and my loved one. Great and informative video!

I just want to say I have been recently been admitted to hospital for my Ed and they have increased my food by so much ,so I have been struggling but watching your videos help me a lot when I’m eating ❤️

I've been had an ed for 2-3 years now and a few weeks ago I started to recover. Its been rough but you have helped me so much. It's so nice to listen to someone who cares and understands what you are going through. Love you ro

I’m currently a month and a half into recovery and I’m really struggling with weight gain right now. It’s so freaking scary to eat and I just feel so overwhelmed and guilty all the time. I’m so exhausted and so freaking tired of all of this…

hearing you speak in the past tense about your illness is just SOOO freaking fantastic, I'm so happy for you and your amazing journey! Keep on fighting - ofc I know you are still struggling but just know, that you are such an inspiration to so many of us ❤️💪🏼

tysm for this video i'm going to send this to my friends to help them understand as i've recently started recovery ily❤

I'm studying psychology and I also worked in a hospital with girls who had anorexia. And this helped so much!! In general your channel gives so much hope and I'm glad I came across it. I really feel for those girls and I want to make a difference, and your videos are really helpful. So proud of you and your journey!!

So much respect for you. My recovery has taken about 5 years, and the fact that you've tackled it head on and have been so vocal about helping others is amazing. Keep up the incredible work 💙

I am not struggling with an ED but still wish that some of these rules would be applied in every day life... even if you have a (kind of) healthy relationship with food it can be so exhausting

I am much older than you yet I have learned so much about this disease that I have dealt with for most of my life, thanks Ro!!!

Seeing your success makes me believe I can do it too - I'm really struggling at the moment, but your videos always help me through the hard times

This video is seriously so helpful Ro. It sums up the most important points of what a lot of people who are suffering struggle to put into words themselves. I know for myself I often get too emotional to express what I'm feeling and why. Thank you for explaining it so clearly!

One of the reasons I love watching you is that you show such amazing courage. You are, every day, waging a war against the lies that your illness tells you, and you. Are. Winning. 💜 Victorious 💜

I love these videos. I'm REALLY struggling with Anorexia atm and these videos really help me feel better x

I've been struggeling with depression for 13 years now, which is obviously a lot diffrent but somehow your recovery videos help me on my journey as well. I think it's how you talk about self awareness, self love and deserving certain things that makes me feel safe. I am starting another therapy this week and you are one of the reasons why. Thanks to you I gained enough hope and confidence to start recovering. So, thanks a lot. You are amazing.

You are such a beacon of light. You’re one of the people who keeps me accountable for my recovery. Thank you for all that you do. Sending love and light 🧡

you’ve helped me so much in my recovery, whenever times get hard i always watch your videos

Tysm for this video me being on recovery for the past 3 weeks has been a really hard challenge but thanks to you and your videos I find it a lot more easier

i love your channel so much

HI I LOVE YOU!! i’m a month into anorexia recovery in 4 days - you’ve helped SO MUCH 🤍🤍

Ro you are my inspiration. It’s currently midnight were I live and I NEEDED to watch this regardless of the time. This is so educational and important:)

Yeah, the "just eat" - part... 🥴 Like, 'thank' s.. Why didn't I think of it... Just eat" 🤦‍♀️ Keep going Ro, you're amazing! 💜

this video is honestly amazing, I'm really happy this exists because it is so terribly important. Thank you for this ;-; ,its actually incredibly considerate. love u ro.

RO! I am SO PROUD of you! I have been following your journey alongside my own and cannot thank you enough for continuing to be such a strong inspiration for me. I have been documenting my own ED recovery journey on my channel and really look up to you. You are doing AMAZING and should be so proud, really. I know how hard it is and you continue to persevere. Stay strong and keep fighting 💪❤️

YAY BESTIE I’ve been so excited for your next upload. I hope you are having an amazing day- you are truly incredible we are all so proud of everything you achieve xxxxx

This was short, concise, and SO WILDLY helpful! Thanks dude

u are incredible Ro, i appreciate u so much, sending hugs luv💓

Hi Ro, I have been following you for a while now. I smile when I see you have posted something and and wait with anticipation to see if you are doing well. Is beautiful to see another human being going through their life journey with grace and courage. You have touched my heart. Big hugs from Australia

I am in training to become a psychologist and I just wanted to say that your videos are so beautiful. I find them insightful and so helpful in understanding the experience of eating disorders. The way you are taking recovery into your own hands is amazing and I am sure you are helping a lot of people. Good luck, you can do this!!!

I am so grateful for your content!!! You have helped me a ton with my recovery!!! 🥺💕🤌🏻

i don't feel guilty anymore after I finished eating , ro you have a hugeee impact on my recovery journey I love you thank you

aawww thank you for your heart !!🥰 i watched your videos but never made a comment.. My little sister has anorexia since 6 years and i hope SO much that she recovers 🥺!! I admire your courage & your force so much dear Ro!💜💜

I have B.E.D which is obviously very different to your struggles but I find your videos so helpful somehow. I’m in awe of you and how helpful and honest you are.

In the beginning I have seen, you are stronger and smarter than ill. Good luck girl.

You seem so much more confident than a few months ago already! It is beautiful to watch your journey, you are so strong! For me, the biggest do is probably the acknowledging victories thing. I think people don't even know how much little phrases might help someone who's struggling :)

I’m honestly so proud of you!! You’ve come so far, you’re such an inspiration! I’ve started my recovery because of you🖤

Shame is just so destructive. Thanks for this.

I wish this video had existed a few years ago when I was in the depths of my anorexia. This video will help so so many people to support their friends and family, thank you for everything you do Ro x

Dear Ro, I would like to congratulate you on this excellent video. You have shared such an important testimony, in such a clear and helpful way. You truly are wonderful. 👏

ooo this is such a good concept- been looking forward to it since your IG stories asking for our input so i’m super excited to watch !!

thank you so much Ro, Youve verbalised all the difficult thoughts and feelings I find so hard to process and now I feel so much less alone xxx

WoW tes vidéos sont incroyables. Elles m’aide tellement tu n’imagines même pas. Je t’aime je t’aime je t’aime MERCI pour tout ce que tu m’apporte 😘❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥

sending this to my closest friends and family members now❤️thank you for this video, it can be really hard to explain to others who don’t understand

You've been such an inspiration and your videos help me a lot in recovery💕 Because of you, I've really pushed myself in facing fear foods and being more kind to myself🥰 Thank you for another amazing video!!

Thank you so much Ro for doing this!!! I very much appreciated it especially for those who don't really understand and want to be there. But, all the topics you hit on was definitely accurate, definitely relatable, and very important. I do think love one and professional should watch this. Actually, everyone should...it's something not often talked about, people often do assume things about a person when struggle with an eating disorder, specifically anorexia here, like not eating, being underweight, wanting attention, it being a choice, etc...yes. it frustrating when you try to do what you want or what's best for you at the moment and something gone wrong like people talking about losing weight, eating "healthier" and exercising more. It's so unhelpful/triggering. I do think by educating others or others making the effort to learn how to help someone suffering this illness. It's not a phase, it's not a choice and it's very serious. And yes being gentle is one key point too...but I do know that we, well for myself, that I need to do my part too, take those steps, not make excuses to agree/confide in my ED, and use the behavior(restrict, overexercise, neg habits...). However, thank you Ro for making this video. I loved as well that you added your own experiences. Your such an inspiring and a greeeat spokesperson tehehe. Love you loads Ro. 🖤💜🌄🕊️😌🥊📣🎥 One other thing, when you said "your going to be one of those success stories"(of recovering) I was like ooohh🥺😌...amazing, so inspiring, it just touched my heart so deeply because I do believe that for you. That was lovely to hear.

Thank you so much. I dont have anorexic but I am and have always been very thin and struggled with food for as long as I can remember. If it hadn't been for your videos I would have never looked into eating disorders (specifically ARFID) and discovered that other people feel the same way I do about food. Watching you face your fears has helped me in ways I cant even begin to describe with my own eating phobias. Thank you so much for your videos, and I wish you all of my best thoughts for your recovery journey!

RO THIS IS BRILL!

Such a beautiful, kind soul! You are a rainbow in so many peoples’ cloud, including mine. Thank you for making this video.

This is amazing! Soooo many good facts and amazing support here, you're so inspiring Ro ❤️

sending this video to my parents in love and not in a mean way, just a hope that it educates them a little more to help me. Thank you Ro❤️

You already ARE a success story. Success is not a one-time end goal. It’s all the little wins that add up over time. I’m so thankful you are sharing and being so open. Keep it up!!!

Glowing as always ❤️

My friend has been struggling with anorexia and it has been really hard for me to support them because I am also struggling with an ED. You have helped me realise I need to be gentle with them and also myself. So thank you Ro. Your videos are truly a gift.

Thank you so much for this video, you’re truly stunning, and so brave for sharing your journey with so many people. Much love ❤️❤️

this is such a beautiful video :,) every time i have really bad days throughout recovery i turn on one of your videos. you word things perfectly. you have helped me more than you know.

(intro) i clicked on your video for help... please don't apologize for giving it to me (after watching) thank you, the only thing that helps is to hear someone that has gone through it, i couldnt be more sincere, thank you for sharing

This ironically I'm sending my councilor,she knows it but it's just a reminder that this is still grips. Also my mum & hubby who are SO amazing but they struggle to help (it doesn't help that i have gastric and intestinal failure so fed by TPN/HPN) but yet again another amazing video. ❤️ Ps if this comment needs removing that's fine but I am just saying that I have a different situation but still need to get people to understand. Godbless XX

honestly your so well spoken and know all the right things i sent this right over to family:) thank you xx

Sauerkraut's bum in the background 😂❤️ Love this so much... (Cuddly toys are the best support and great to cry into, so is actually quite relevant!!)

Thankyou so much for this! It’s reaffirmed what I’m doing to support my friend is right and also what else I can do. Your channel had already helped me so much and I’m so proud of you x

Over 100k subscribers 🙌🙌🙌 CONGRATULATIONS, so well deserved x

Just tuned in to see how gorgeous you look! You’ve come so far and should be so proud. You look happy, healthy, and strong. What an inspiration. Bravo 👏

you are an actual angel. this is such an incredible video - i sent it to my mum and she told me how appreciative she was of it 🤍🤍

i resonate so much with what you say in this vid. Wish my parents and relatives had watched this three years ago when i was really struggling with anorexia and all they could do was commenting on the way i looked and what i used to eat.

u are truly amazing. so many people need to here this🤍

god im so thankful i found your channel im just over 2 months into recovery myself and i kid you not your videos have been a life saver!!! must of rewatched them all about 10 times😭😭thankyou for making this kinda content it’s so helpful, im proud of you❤️

To my point of view and from what I’m going through, anorexia is not about having a problem with food. It is about having a problem with ourselves and this is why it’s a dangerous illness. Sending lot of support and love to all of you 🤍

Yay my fav and comfort youtuber uploaded I feel so motivated after watching you

You're one of the bravest and strongest people I know (even if only through watching you on screen). Seriously, from someone who's struggling with an ED, it must take unbelievable amount of strength to do that recovery thing while your brain is constantly SCREAMING at you to do otherwise and insulting you in the worst ways... watching your videos helps me so much to treat myself the best way I can right now. Thank you so much for helping me and many, many other people, you're so smart and so beautiful - inside and out!

Your channel is very helpful even for someone like myself that has been bulemic for 25 years. Even though it's a different eating disorder it's mentally equally challenging. People do not realise how much harm being forceful can do. I "recovered" more than a decade ago but the demons still remain. That voice in my head telling me to stop eating or purge or feel guilty still surfaces even now. I get so angry even though there is no reason for it. Get upset because of the permanent damage I've done to my own body sometimes knowing I can't undo it and sometimes just feel there is no point. It's not an easy task to recover and well done you for doing so well and pushing forward regardless of your emotions. You're a strong girl and you should be proud of yourself for taking these steps to recovery 🙏❤️

Every time I feel insecurity or lose motivation I think of you and continue the fight. So I just wanted to say: Thank you :3

I think no one should ever comment on another's person's body regardless of what they're going through. I admire you so much Ro, you're amazing!

Ro you look gorgeous and your skin is glowing. I appreciate your honesty in your channel

I appreciate your honesty, sincerity, and that you keep it real. I love your positive attitude. Thank you for sharing your journey. Keeping you in my prayers!!!

I have struggled with anorexia on and off for about 12 years. When I was in recovery an overweight nurse asked me for diet tips. It was so inappropriate I was completely shocked... I have now been fully recovered for 5 years. While I do occasionally struggle with other mental illnesses like depression I am happy to report that anorexia did not manage to set foot in my brain ever again 🥳! Keep going Ro, you got this! 💪🏼 much ♥️ from Germany

Your words, advice and guidance in this video are true representations of realistic, helpful and pure self-knowledge. This will help so many people understand and recognise what is helpful and what’s not. Thanks heaps for doing this! Such an inspiration

You're glowing today Ro, another great video as always x. Looking forward to the next one!

Your content is invaluable. You are so well spoken and provide really clear and strong support for everything you say. This was really thoughtfully done, can’t wait to watch your impact continue to unfold.💗

this is gold thank you. i am so grateful this exists. i want to send this to the people that say they care about me but i feel they won't watch it. maybe i'll try. i am trying to recover right now all on my own like you have been - professionals did Not help they made it so much worse - and people around me have said hurtful things when i've gone to eat - unintentionally - but i haven't been brave enough in the moment say 'please don't say that to me' because i feel like people will think i am overreacting. most people just Do Not understand the concept that it isn't 'just eat' it is an Illness. it's not me overreacting but i am still scared of the judgement that will come with my being sensitive to small comments. i want to be braver though and share it. thank you. i will try and show this to the people around me.

I literally cannot thank you enough for making this video omg I love you SO MUCH! this helps so much more than you know wowowowowow

Omg this video is so amazing🥺 thank u so much for explaining yourself so well and make it easier for other people to open up w their parents and love ones, and also help them understand a bit more about this illness. Sometimes is just so difficult to find the words or try to talk about it, but you just did it perfectly🌷🖤 Can’t be more grateful for all the work and help u bring with every video/post, sending lots of love for u and your family!!🙏🏻🌸🤍

I love this video and appreciate the time you took to make it. I also thought about the fact that whatever “friend” I send this to isn’t going to watch it or they will will act like they get it and continue the same behavior.

One of my best friends is suffering through an eating disorder. This video helped me a lot to know what to do and I do believe that you will get better. You will be a successful story hopefully already because I’m kind of late to this video, but I want to thank you a lot for showing me what to do.❤

So much love for you and your channel Ro, you're doing a great thing and you've helped so many people just by doing what you do. Thank you for everything!!

So glad i've come across your channel. Super inspiring. You show your achievements but also the struggles. Nothing is fake. Thank you for being real and showing it's not as easy as people think. You're doing so well. Incredible. x