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What kind of writing do you do? If every business you contract with is “screwing you over,” have you taken off the rose-tinted glasses and stepped back to really look over your own work a bit more critically? Maybe it really is just par work. (Who am I to say, I’m just some scrub on the internet. But consider it.) There’s a lot of writers in the world and it’s difficult to stand out. In any case, I would never quit a day job and rely solely on writing as an income; *especially* in an economy like this. Writing is more of a hobby or perhaps a side gig. If you happen to land a bestseller, great, but otherwise you’ve kinda picked a losing strategy trying to make a livelihood out of writing. Unless you’re writing for a tabloid, writing scientific/historical research articles, or writing guides/instruction manuals, it’s an *extremely* unreliable source of income.
@@kiriki4558Not necessarily. You just need a healthy middle to stay grounded. Not everything is great and easy. But also not everything is awful and difficult. Everything is both.
@@LeadyvashKC They say the Optimist builds the airplane, the pessimist built the parachute. But the first optimist glued on wings with feathers and wax to their arms and jumped off a cliff and said it'd work. There's a balance to being miserable when things are bad or miserable when things are great. I know some "pessimists" who were just real about things. When the sun was down they were frowning. But when they were 'miserably' riding a jetski, a jaquizzi, a good engineering job, and following a "Would you rather be miserable early in life, to be happy later?" approach. Life was all downhill. Meanwhile i know a lot of party people who chose the "pick what's fun in life", who ended up really fun partiers in their high school drinking and college frat drop out days. If their parents had connections and were rich, they got into frat clubs with their frat mates. If they weren't, they literally ended up fast food workers 6/10 or nepo sons 3/10. And then 1-2 would end up being disneyland workers/stoners.
Same! I belive there is something good to be found even in the worst situations, in failure there is growth, in rejection there is opertunity, ect. But that doesn't mean I can't have bad emotions because these things happened, that's okay too
I usually hate pessimism. But this is a healthy version of it. I hate "Everything is pointless, might as well never try". But I can relate to "This probably won't work out, I'll do something that works for me."
@@eryscalamitas1611 Pessimism, Nihilism... I don't like it when people expect the worst from society and every person they meet, bad mouth themselves and anyone they haven't met, are too risk averse to try anything new, shoot down any idea you have that's outside of their comfort zone, and generally ignore positive results under the assumption that there must be some kind of bad thing behind it. I can relate to and respect being cautious and cynically witty, not being gullible or being in a bad mood. I can even respect understanding that we are insignificant compared to forces greater than ourselves. But I hate the smirk of condescension when all that has been contributed to the discussion was a recommendation for inaction.
@@lapancaki6548 if true, that checks out. No shade on depressed people, though. Whether it's true or not. But if it is true, I want depressed people to know that humans, of any culture, actually do care about eachother unconditionally and unselfishlya lot of the time. That includes the people around you, if you give them a chance to.
i'm a pessimist, and i had a VERY optimistic friend. she'd try and convince me that i just had to believe, but everytime i did it never worked. we fought a lot, and fell out, but i'm still thankful to her for trying to give me hope even if it wasn't going to happen.
There’s a thing called self fulfilling prophecy. Essentially you cause your own downfall. Of course all issues aren’t that but perpetually believing in the negative will get you negative more often than positive.
It may not rly be a blessing for you- you fulfilled your prophecy by practically digging your foot in the ground for failure But the part was needed for your friend. I hope their life is fulfilling and I hope yours becomes more than pessimism
Idk about the other replies, but I'm rooting for both of you. You may not have been a good match for each other as friends, but that doesn't make either of you a bad person. I'm hoping that you, as a pessimist, even if you see more of the negativity than the good, can at least learn to simply appreciate the good things that happen in life, even if only a little. And I'm hoping that your friend, as an optimist, seeing and believing the good in life more often, can learn to not be afraid of the negativity in life and learn to live with it in a healthy way while still being positive. Which is something that I myself, as an optimist, is struggling with. You guys may not be friends anymore, but you can still learn from each other and grow. Ignore the other people saying you've dug your own grave and stuff, because you haven't, you really haven't. You may have been too negative and missed out on a lot of opportunities, but that doesn't mean you're done for. Like they say, 'darkness can't exist without light'. Even if it seems impossible, there's always hope. No one's fate is set in stone. You must also remember that things won't get better straight away, but that's alright. Things will get better, with patience and time. We live in a difficult, harsh, yet loving and beautiful world. I wish you love and happiness in your life, both of you. Have a lovely day/night :)
In a weird way, I find my pessimism slowly morphed into a mishmash of pessimism and optimism. “Yeah it’s bad, but it’s better than it was before all this. And yeah, it could get worse, but you’ve been through hell, and if you could get out of it once, you can get out again. It’s bad now, but it WILL get better. Just let yourself be sad or hurt (safely) until the feeling leaves. And then it gets easier.” It is in fact important to have both. Feel your feelings, and it’ll be okay.
I find that pessimism is easier than optimism, because for example let’s say you were expecting a giant chocolate factory but instead you got a single candy bar. You’d be disappointed right? Then say you expected to be punched in the face, but instead got a candy bar. You’d be astatic! Awesome, free candy bar!
@@frozenraspberries1552 I’m not saying it has to be THAT extreme, I’m just trying to get my point across. Like if you kept hoping to get better at something but kept failing you’d be disappointed
It isn't tho imo it just makes everything hopeful look like it's not going to happen and it makes you a miserable human aka myself because I don't believe that anything will get better so why try?
I think pessimism can make things hard, too. If you expect to be punched, then presumably you would keep your guard up, in preparation to blocking the punch. If you keep your guard up all the time, you might end up covering your face and not seeing the candy bar you're being offered. (I am basing this off of personal experience, so feel free to counter argue) Edit: I just realized the video said it, too: Blind optimism is just as bad as blind pessimism, in that they're both 'blind' visions of the world, I guess.
This is how I feel right now. All my life I’ve had no direction on what I wanted to do. Growing up I made terrific grades, played multiple instruments, and did many sports. Graduating highschool class of 23 I had a 4.34 GPA, 34 ACT, 34 clubs, 7 varsity letters, was the lead role in multiple musical and theatrical productions, was the lead snare of the Battery, was the second male tenor for the school choir, the morning school news host, the chief editor of the Literary Arts magazine, and the class president. I got into Yale with the intention of majoring in chemistry but last minute something very unfortunate happened that changed how I viewed the world. I realized I wanted to dedicate my life to entertaining others, and began pursuing my dream of becoming an actor. It’s been about a year now: I’m currently at university going after a dual major in Film and Marketing, and have recently begun modeling for an athletic ware company. I still have very little direction on what I need to do and what the next steps forward are, but I think of all my friends who continue to push forward with their respective dreams and that encourages me to continue persisting
@@thepinkestpigglet7529 God damn that is not the way to tell someone anything. Sure, expecting everything to go wrong could be harmful in the long run, but saying it's a good way to meet an early grave does not help anything. In no way would it ever, if anything it harms your point, because it doesn't offer an solution to shift someone's line of thinking, if anything, it only furthers the pessimistic whispering. It's a mindset, and saying that, only confirms that mindset. I'm not here to simply say you're wrong, because it's true that it is harmful if overused. But that's not the way to say it. Some things will go wrong, so with those certain things, the things you feel won't go well, it's fine to keep your expectations low. With things you're good at though, raise that bar a little bit more and if it goes 'wrong,' then it's alright. I feel the harmful bit is when you start to internalize it and make it personal. That's when it starts tearing you apart. That's what has to be dealt with. Not every 'wrong' or 'bad' thing is truly bad, only a learning opportunity. Anyway that's my two cents, thank you for coming to my ted talk bye-
When you listed what you had to go through as a writer, this was one of my biggest fears: Giving away my ideas and storys to a publisher that would change my vision in an unfavorable way. A few of my story ideas I can probably allow, but not a passion project I have been working on for a bit now. I'd rather have my writings be posted with no attention, instead of a published book that has nothing to do with my ideas or stories.
Optimism is a lot healthier than pessimism though. And being optimistic doesn't mean letting people take advantage of you or handle people's mistreatment of you.
I like to imagine optimism and pessimism balance one another out. Neither one is better than the other as they are both different sides of the same coin, but too much of either can do more harm than good. It’s important to find a balance between the two as one lets you dream big whilst the other makes you evaluate the less pleasant reality of any given situation.
IM SO GLAD THAT YOU GUYS RECONNECTED! seeing old friends for the first time and hitting it off again is one of my favorite feelings. Me and my friend cut contact for only about 6 months because of this whole dramatic thing that turned out to be a serious miscommunication. Now, we're best friends, and I don't know what I'd do without him 💛.
I just broke up with my friend of four whole years. We both make ocs and loved to roleplay. We got toxic. She was unmotivated and gave up so easily. We're finally not talking, but I missed those characters we made together. So I'm going to learn to animate and show the world what we made. For her. I miss you, Aubree.
I'm starting to feel like what I thought was my optimistic attitude, is actually me trying to convince myself that all is good while I'm actually falling apart on the inside
I kind of feel like the friend in this scenario. I know way too much at way too young. And at times it nearly frustrates me when people don't understand my views and just regard it as 'you're worrying too much, quit bringing other people down'. I've had multiple times where I contacted the su|cide hotline. Yet I'm still here. And it's because I don't wanna die, even when things are hard and how much I overthink about the world and how it works. (Though I do envy the people who are 'ignorant' and don't think about it 😭)
Being an optimist surrounded by pessimists is also so difficult. Why can no one around me see the good that there is in the world? Why does everyone think everytjing is pointless, and why do they stay in that thought, even though it brings nothing but sadness?
@@hutaiyakiYou are implying that thoughts that bring sadness aren’t worth having which isn’t a very good message. Just because something is sad doesn’t mean that you can just ignore it.
This video hit me when I needed it. I'm at the point where I thought that nothing in life's ever going to be worth it to me, but I also thought that all I needed to do is to believe that all I needed to do is to keep doing what I do with a smile. It's harder to smile most days for me, but there are moments where I thought that I'm still doing a good enough job to find something worth it. I guess for me, this video tells me that instead of expecting *something* in return from everyone I'm working or living for, or dread as if I'm sentenced to some sort of prison, I only need to look back into *WHY* I chose and started to love this path in the first place, then keep doing what I need to do because of that reason why that spark happened at the start.
As a pessimist this is exactly how it can be! We’d love to be as optimistic, and really, you kind of have to be at least a little to keep going. But in practice pessimism is less about only seeing doom and gloom and more about seeing the reality of things Edit: If I was talking about realism I would have said it, y’all. The video is talking about pessimism, so so was I.
You don't seem the reality of things any more than an optimist. You have the same level of expectations based on nothing but bias, you just lean in the opposite way.
@@HolyOranges2009 Yeah. Toxic positivity can breed "stepford/utah smilers", smiling on the outside, but hidden/brushed away higher "rates" of people hiding problems until they just fester. Over pesimissm can be a drag in the mud, when you're on a sunny day and someone complains their pina colada isn't sweet enough, their next isn't sour enough. Their bum has sand (but they won't clean it), and the beach is sandy. (But they insisted on it over a pool). A realist/problem solver might say things are good, but we should make them better if we can. They might hold a umbrella out in the rain. if a child is crying they might get a bandage. If the beach is sandy, they can either wipe you off or send you into the ocean though. 😅😅😸😸
Whether the glass is half empty, or half full, that doesn’t matter. What does matter is that you don’t waste what’s there. Take what you have and make the most of it, even if it’s half empty. Don’t give up guys, you’re just getting started.
It’s hard to know if I’m a pessimist or an optimist, everything’s so bad right now that my expectations are very low but I’ve always somehow believed it can get better. So I have no idea 😭
I’m a very heavy optimist because I learned that no matter how people treated me and how harshly the world went against me that I should always be everyone else’s angel and keep seeking for the best results in it all or patiently wait for them without ever losing hope or feeling down. This is insanely hard. It is tearing me apart but the reason I’m still living. On the other hand, I have a very negative friend. He ceases to see a point in trying and never understands that there is good in everything so long as you look for it, and I still understand him while at least trying to help him open up a bit so it doesn’t lead to future regrets. It’s obvious we squabble a bit, but we’re best friends. Though I do understand that optimism isn’t always everyone’s preference, I feel like even though pessimism is easier, optimism is just better in the long run. I understand him but just really wished more people around me would be able to be as peaceful and kind as I grew and matured to be. Part of my constant desire to see perfectionism and open up to the world could just be maturing at the age of four and having heavy trauma, but if I can do it, why can’t they?
You ever hate someone because they dissapointed you more often than they aftually hurt you. Like damn smth about this video makes me miss that friendship.
If only this happened to me and my friend too. She was too optimistic about everything even when she's already being hurt by it, sometimes even ignorant. I tolerated it so many times until I couldn't help it anymore. I saw what I was becoming and cut ties with her. Sometimes, magnets really just lose their magnetism the more they're dropped by everything around them. And that happened to us. Sorry, Enomelly. I'm aware I'm not that great of a friend, but just to try lightening everything for you before I become someone I hate, I left. I don't want to hurt you anymore. I'm so sorry.
Pessimism and optimism work hand in hand. If you experience one of them, youre capable of experiencing the other, because one day you will be proved wrong. Its good to be realistic about what will and wont work out, but if theres a chance, hope might be the last step to get you there. Keep hoping, but dont disappoint yourself. The opportunities that you are presented with do not define your future; it is entirely possible to make your own opportunities. Keep going. Life is a rollercoaster; if its bad, its bound to get better. Every time.
I got goosebumps... this is actually so good. It truly captures the struggles of writers despite the shortage of words, and yet, depicts it so well in a meaningful perspective!
Toxic positivity doesnt just cut out negative feelings - it cuts out human feelings. Invalidating cynicism is rejecting your own nature as a human being
You were right to work to understand your friends pessimism, but you were also right to distance yourself from it when necessary. Being around negative people can give you interesting perspectives, but they also drain you and drag you away from opportunities.
Same. I keep seeing stories of people who decided to write their novel in 2020 and now they're published. Or people who decided to start a business in 2021 and they're successful. The past 4 years barely existed for me.
I remember everyone’s excitement over the 2020s. Everyone was saying let’s make this decade as great as the 1920s was! It’ll be one long happy party! But then covid hit and all our sparkling hope was lost. Now the economy is shot. A basket of normal groceries is 100+ dollars, and so many opportunities have been lost. 😞
Ive had friends who were nothing but pessimistic and didn't try, gave a bunch of excuses, blamed things that they could work thru, theyd punch down every single solution I gave them. I dont like being friends with those ppl. They usually end up being the biggest liars too. I am not your "yes man" and I dont expect/want you to be one too. I want both of us to grow and I want to see you actually TRY. Life is a wonderful thing we are lucky to see another day. We are lucky to have the ability to try. If it doesn't work out, at least you tried! And at least in the modern world there are a million alternatives as a solution.
Pessimism and optimism need to be used at the right dose at the right times, as the old saying "Too much of anything is bad", the point is learning to manage these emotions.
This is something that's just part of life for me as an autistic person, but some people don't seem to realize or don't understand at first that you can do something while crying about it, complaining about it, reviling it, ect. I am more able to do things that I hate or have extreme difficulty with or attempt to do things I end up unable to do because the whole time I am able to ask for help and validation and remind myself that a task failure is not a personal failure. Pessimism and a negative attitudes are not cages to overcome, they're tools of empathy.
I am realist. I try to find good and bad in everything, because everything it the world has benefits and downsides. i am trying to see the world for what it really is.
I found that over the years, I've actually become a pessimist turned optimist. Due to certain experience in life related to bullying and lack of emotional support from family, throughout my middle school years, I've always thought that I'm a good-for-nothing who should have long died and leave the resources to someone who can use it better. I aspired to be a famous writer and artist. I even thought that I would be giving it a final go. If I fail at this, I might as well just die But then I met more people afterwards. These days, I no longer wish to be a writer/artist. It doesn't mean I've given up my love of Creation and expression, but simply that the path I wanted to walk on would be accompanied by many other things that would grind away my passion more and more. It's something so pure and unadulerated that I wouldn't want it to become work. It doesn't really matter whether I end up becoming famous or not. My creations are like my children, that I just want to see them to completion. It would be great if others would appreciate it of course, but even if I end up dying as a no-name writer, as long as I can find the time to write and draw after work and persist my writing projects, I'm content Sometimes I do wonder if I would think and feel differently had I chosen to be a professional writer/artist, but I think it's ultimately just meaningless what-ifs. Chances are that I would just face different hardships and problems and wonder the same had I chosen so
Im an optimistic realist. I have goals, but i keep them grounded and work towards them tirelessly at my own pace, and in the meantime i do work that is light and supports my passions. Don't put all your eggs in one basket, and make sure you aren't blind to any faults in your lofty goals.
I’m an optimist but I’ve struggled with anxiety with depression my whole life. I’m surrounded by people who are both pessimistic and don’t understand how my mental illnesses negatively affect me. It’s a terrible combination. They tend to make my fears for the future worse and think I’m weird for trying to believe I can get better. They don’t realize I have to think that way because if I don’t I might get worse. But whenever I have issues related to my anxiety nobody wants to understand and instead shame me for it. When I’m happy it’s “It’s going to get worse later.” Or “Why bother it doesn’t matter anyway.” But when I’m upset it’s “You’re being dramatic.” Or “you’re too sensitive.” If I have hope I’m stupid and a horrible person. If I’m scared I’m annoying and blowing things out of proportion. I don’t know what to do. I think I should just die. Edit: Jesus why did I type all that? That was dramatic as fuck.
Lovely video. Very inspiring. Very reminiscent to my daily life! I’m a pessimistic with a very optimistic man! He tells me everyday it will be okay and to keep at it, but he understands I’m still gonna be very pessimistic in the end while still enjoying what we have in the moment together when times are good and my mind is not spiraling into a dark abyss of dread. He’s kept me going for years and I love him so much for that. Never stop being you, is what he tells me most often, even when I’m being so mean to both me and him. He encourages me to think about how many good memories we have had together. And I’m honestly happy about his super optimistic nature clashing hard with my pessimistic world views. We get into some very light hearted arguments together and he’s so sweet in the end. Telling me I’m right and he’s also just as right and we can still argue even after that. lol I love him so much for being such a bright light to my head of thinking so much in this world is meaningless and so much is just gonna be rotting away in 40 ish years time including my own body. He laughs and tries to smack my head gently to tell me to knock those thoughts out and come and look at the pretty view with him. I’m grateful to everyone who’s so optimistic including my wonderful loving partner! He’s so right that he’s correct about the world not being so terrible. But I’m also right in thinking the world has way too many terrible issues and it feels hopeless some days. We just cuddle in bed together when I get that way. ❤
I think a high amount of optimism with a sense of pessimism is the way to go. Like you WANT the nice and good stuff and KNOW the nice and good stuff BUT u also acknowledge and KNOW what COULD go wrong. This gives you a motivation to know what to do,get prepared for the worst and hope for the best.
currently having a breakdown over fear of submitting to an art competition since every time i get rejected- this is pushing me to try anyways, thank you
And it is not only one sided too because I believe that the friend receiving the blind optimism most definitely would remember you and get boosts of motivation as well.
I don't know why, but this work touched such a soft spot within my heart that I inadvertently shed a tear. I also write, though only as a hobby, but have only gone back to it recently after experiencing months of blanks due to a lack of self-confidence. I needed to see this today, to feel a gentle push on my back. Thank you so much - I don't know if you'll read this comment, but do know you've made a stranger's day today, and your creation is now a permanent part of her ❤
I wish her and I could still be friends our imaginations bounced so well off of each other- she just wanted so much. I couldn’t “be with her” like she wanted me too and it breaks my heart
I've been told I am a pessimist, but I feel like I am an optimist that's grounded in reality. Like, things suck but they are better then before. X things probably not going to work out because it isn't obviously, hoping it will work is only going to end in disappointment, but that also doesn't mean we can't make things better and that things won't get better. We can still find another way. I still have hope for the future even if I know things won't work out right away or with a specific plan. I believe things can get better and that we should work towards that but I also recognize when something simply isn't going to work.
Your stories some is very unfortunate some i experience myself and you have my full respect for being able to express to put it into something that speaks meanings for 12 years now of the 18 years i been on this earth i have accomplished nothing i have been through many betrayal that i started to believe im the one that people shouldn't trust i have problems lots but i am also a problem i don't know who i hurt or who truly wish harm on me i have been alone it was me against the world and still is i will never see past 20 i am sure but you you are overcoming i know you may seem it isn't much but you're better then i will ever be keep climbing man because i rather be just me alone down in this deep abyss then to see others down here with me be safe man carry on
...No it's not. You shouldn't just always believe that everything will work out and that there will be a happy ending. Optimism is sometimes better, yes, but a good amount of pessimism is important too.
So glad your friend reconnected! If i saw any friends from my past id rather get disintegrated into atoms! Seeing them happy from afar brings me peace that they are ok and thriving. Thats all i want to know is that they are good still.
Every time I try to be optimistic about something I feel like I’m lying to myself so I simply just accept the bad with the worse and go on with my life.
I grew up optimistic, and was a big pessimist as a teen, and now I feel like I've mellowed out to a nice middle ground. Through my experiences, I've learned to plan for every worst case scenario. Not because I expect it to happen, but so if it does I'm prepared. And still allow myself to hope for best case scenario, even if I know it won't happen for that situation. I feel like a lot of life is trying to find meaning, where there ultimately isn't one. Meaning is what YOU make it. Like, I've learned with my art, doing it with the goal of a career is bad for me. So I've been trying to do it because I love it again.
I started as an optimist which then was pressured into pessimism which i later learned out of. I love to say now “prepare for the worst, hope for the best, and expect nothing” because you simply must let yourself be ready for whatever rather than just for what you make life.
Kind of reminds me of a lyric from a song I like that goes "Glass half empty, glass half full - Well either way you won't be going thirsty" Maybe that's still optimism; but it has truth to it too. Sometimes when I get stuck on the pessimism, I remember that lyric and it helps me to take a step forward.
I’m kind of both optimistic and pessimistic. I acknowledge that things suck, and I know how awful situations get, but I make sure to not let that ruin my motivation to succeed and I try to focus on the positives just as much.
I’m an optimist but I’m also a realist. I want to uplift your hopes but I’ll never try to blind you from reality. As much as fun creating can be it all comes down to money and making a profit.
Realize that when one is only looking up at ideals, they stumble from the rocks of reality. But when one is only staring down at reality, they lose their way to their ideals. It is only when they walk together that they can have each other’s backs.
This is why im gonna have my mothers friend help me self publish... My writing is mine and mine only. Keep up the amazing work and good luck further on your journey!
Thank you to my longterm roleplay friend, who i have talked to on and off for the last 17 years. We dont write together anymore but i write still today inspired by what we used to create together.
I was a pessimist for a long time, but I had to learn optimism before that pessimism consumed me, as it nearly did. I've learned that optimism and pessimism are just...too simple to define the experience of life. I'm an optimist in nature and in wishes, but a realist because life calls for it. I'm also a pessimist when trends show themselves, but also an optimist because those trends end. At the end of the day, i'm neither an optimist nor a pessimist. I'm just a human that hopes for the best and deals with the worst so there's another chance for the best.
i'm both. if something doesn't go as expected, i get pessimistic, but i'll go back into it with the optimism that i had from the start, and i think that's a good way of going about life. remember that the world is great, but everything has a few bad apples, and if you look in the basket, you'll find the apple perfect for your taste. :)
Its a difficult balance, because too much pessimism leads you to give up and never try, and too much optimisim leads you to be unequipped for curveballs and obstacles. As is with everything else with life, the difficulty is in finding the balance.
Thank you for all your videos. I relate to your videos from personal experience and I don't think these experiences are talked about enough. I have been on both the receiving and giving end of mental health. Thank you for sharing these. Some of them remind me of Steven universe.
I try to keep myself grounded while being hopeful and telling myself that things will turn out okay, because even if things never get better and it all goes to shit, I wouldn't be able to be proud of my life if I didn't work hard every day towards building a better future. It's okay to acknowledge reality and that the present situation sucks. To do otherwise would be naive and irresponsible. What's not okay is to wallow in that misery and give up. Things won't get better if you don't do anything about it. Complacency is useless.
You need both. Im very optimistic but i know to not be disappointed when something doesnt happen, that's just how life is. It's a game of moderation: too much optimism and that fail hurts more; too much pessimism and you will never find joy.
