I love that you focused on the upsides of autism and ADHD. Having being diagnosed late in life I realised last month that people focus on negatives and I felt like a child. I had to remind myself all the great things I have achieved in my life, and the responsibilities I have had. It's good all the other stuff about autistic traits and learning about tools that may help and support on offer, but it would also be nice to get some balance and look at positive things people have achieved, and how to use our strengths. Everyone has talents.
you prolly dont care at all but does someone know of a way to log back into an instagram account?? I somehow lost the login password. I appreciate any assistance you can give me.
I was diagnosed late too unfortunately the world is still not supportive enough. Everyone else gets to live their life they want but we aren’t able to do so. My NDIS funding that was originally supporting my engagement in the activities that bring me joy and am passionate about has been removed after 4 years and I’m pissed.
My favourite trait which I share with other ND types is my curiosity! We seek to understand things at a deeper level, will ask claritive questions and think deeply on a subject. It feeds into the detail-orientedness, problem-solving and hyperfocus, but I love it most because of how it's used to understand people without judgement. And the delight n discovery!
I have been told myself that because of my autism and ADHD I can be very annoying or a chatterbox especially around friends or loved ones. It's caused me to silence myself if I do ever end up like that in the future so I cannot really be the me I want to be in conversation. I will have days where people don't mind me talking for ages as it allows me to express myself freely from judgement, but the days I cannot be myself are the worst more around when I'm on my really overly hyperactive days as I'll always be told I'm annoying or that I should calm down. From my own experience with having both ADHD and Autism it's harder on some days than others
Fixing code got me, i'm a Software Engineer and i'm glad that after years of hard school and mobbing i am able to use what held me down before to adapt to code super quickly and learn new coding practices/functions etc... in a fraction of the time Best of this is imagining the people who were Mobbing me working at Aldi tho
I've had people say so many times "thank you for your honesty". Creative refreshing solutions to problems. Fairness: less likely to backstab or compete to get ahead; better team players. I overshare so that I am more understood and not a mystery. I think that comes from wanting to be a better collaborator.
Great to hear about the positive aspects of autism and ADHD. I do get tired of all the negative talk around these, as if that's all there is. I'm not denying the difficulties; I just think people need to hear about the positives more often.
Being Autistic and Dyslexia is really good for doing a PHD including finding a solution for a problem which has been argued for 30 years, but different way of seeing the universe also makes it interesting when trying to get people see just how much has been contributed as so many cannot see beyond what they know.🙄 As I was growing up I said my Dyslexia meant I was working Windows on an Apple computer which since my Autism diagnoses I have realised is a good way of describing trying to work in a neurotypical way when it is just not how I am.
I've been watching quite a few of your videos lately, and I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for making them. It's nice to have wayfarers out there to help us along our journey.
I love that you were wearing a Hufflepuff top while talking about how fair and caring being neurodivergent can make us. I wonder if anyone has ever looked into where we usually fall house-wise, especially since so many of us have Harry Potter as a special interest! I'd guess Hufflepuff and Ravenclaw!
Love this! I feel like my autism is a fairly good thing, when I have a special interest, I'll learn absolutely everything about it and then move onto something new. I've done this so many times that I have a really great knowledge on a lot of subjects. I'm an extremely fast learner, particularly with physical tasks and computing, super handy! I'm always honest which makes me a good friend and my clients love that about me. The ADHD is more challenging for me, I'm soooo easily distracted and my memory is terrible. The only things I tend to remember are when people do something wrong or it's special interest related. I also have a love hate relationship with my oversharing, sometimes it's really funny and other times I feel embarrassed.
I know all about the timekeeping thing. I get more and more anxious as I get closer and closer to when I have to be somewhere. I'm usually an hour early for work when I have to start at 2pm, but don't like being on the 6am starts as I have to rely on the first buses of the day, and they're not always the most punctual. I now walk 2 and a half miles to make sure I get the right bus at the right time and am up at work as early as possible.
Thank you. My son is really struggling with his recent diagnosis and I hope this helped him a little. He's stuck in an "it's not fair that I'm neurodivegent" loop right now.
Snap! Autism, ADHD, dyspraxia I was born with congenital hypothyroidism, so often these ADS & ADHD traits are written off to this, so have to advocate hard to push for this. Currently struggling with ADHD, ASD , and meaningful employment
It's always to comforting and stimulaitng to watch your videos Ella, you are a lovely person and I really enjoy the way you go about explaining. Even if I don't feel like I have any of these strengths, despite having ASD and ADD, I know I have some other strengths. I do think it was a great idea to include that you don't have to have these strengths to be good enough. I think it means a lot subconsciously to a lot of people, even if they don't see it. I know it has for me.
I have a very similar tendency to remember the meals I've eaten with people much better than I can remember their names or what I'm meant to do for the next week. It has helped me so much while working in food service and at grocery stores!
I cant say enough how enlightening your videos are. I have been reffered for an ADHD assessment the fast way through the NHS. But my traits match up so much with autism too that even my close friends say Autism is definitely there with my struggles. I am just a bit puzzled what to do as I am always drilling my doctor on my health problems. Adding another test to the mix is sending me wild 😂
I have both I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression before my teens diagnosed with Aspergers at age 23 and ADHD Inattentive at 40. I feel like I’ve had my dreams crushed all my life.
Good to hear positive, encouraging opinions on these traits and not feel like it's a big problematic issue!!!💕 Haha. Love the editing in this video 🤣❤️
About being direct and honest: This is so multifaceted. Yes, I appreciate more direct contact like "Do you wanna come to my appartment tonight?" in the first message of a complete stranger or "Should we try oral sex?" instead of aveing some kind of physical code langague to try to figure everything out or "I thought you knew that I didn't want kisses in our sms conversations" (slightly defensive, but I understood her feeling) or "I don't like your quoting me in your e-mails" or "could you take care of my dogs for me while I am away?" etc. Also, I can be very open to factual corrections. I really hate when people don't correct my mistakes when I talk to them in a gruop setting. That is so ambarasing! However, I don't have male friends because they say things like "Stop living in the past! Think forwards!" after a conversation of two minutes or assume that I feel hurt by mean people instead of all well-intended peices of "advice" from friends that I hear over and over again or of constantly being juged and misunderstood. Men are so blunt! Women are often blunt too, but are generally much more soft. Why do people give advice instead of just listening? By the way, I often say "Listen to what I mean and not what I say!"
I remember first time meetings too! In quite a bit of detail including at least a rough idea of exactly what topics were included in the conversation. I am also very good at problem solving - which has helped me a lot in my career.
great video, and a positive one, but also a side note, not ALL of us on the spectrum are tech savvy, or into gaming, it is a 'trait' but sadly not all of us do, I have Autism, but my special interest, and skills are in the 'analogue world' taking mechanical things apart, and discovering how they work, so this is 'atypical' for us, but we are still detail focussed.
Lovely video. I know the words to all the songs too. :o) Discovered for myself last January that I'm autistic. I'm 48. Still trying to get used to the idea. I have a very visual brain, so it seems that I can play back in my head like a film, most of my life experiences. This can be good and bad. I can also perfectly remember the layouts of buildings. Most odd but useful I guess. xx
@@bogeyworman6102 Thanks ever so much for your reply, I will definitely seek that book out. I'm just reading a piece she's written about how she thinks, and it's uncanny, as it almost exactly describes the way that I think. Thank you.
First thing i see when looking at my screen is hufflepuff. My inner hufflepuff is like jeeey:D a fellow hufflepuff:D. And also naw tanks im curious what the strengths are you are gonna talk about:).
I relate to so much of this, yet my executive function is so horrible, that I fail at some of the most basic endeavors. I have Autism, but they believe that I don't have ADHD, even though they did not actually rule ADHD out at the Autism clinic. I tried writing things down, and um.... I nearly always lose the list. I know that the first step involves getting organized, but I have no idea how to go about it. I mean, without external reminders, I don't usually even remember to eat or sleep until I start getting extremely fatigued and even sick. I have on rare occasions forgotten to eat for a few days, or gone a couple days without remembering to go to sleep. My simple daily routine has greatly helped, but whenever it gets disrupted, I still forget to eat or sleep. Funny thing is, I absolutely love eating and sleeping, but I still forget to so frequently that I am constantly about 30 pounds underweight.
Hey David, I hope you're doing okay, and I realise I am replying really late. I don't know if you watched Ella's video on being diagnosed, but sometimes psychiatrists make decisions really quickly, which might mean they overlook stuff. I am autistic and have ADD, but the first time I was diagnosed I was diagnosed only with ADD because I didn't ostensibly present with the same social problems as a "typical" autistic person would have. So I'm a bit in the opposite end to yourself, but I think it's still valid. Coming to understand that I am autistic has made a huge impact in my life, even though I received my diagnosis only 5 months ago, but I know from my own experience that it was so much harder to deal with my autistic symptoms before I was medicated. So in essence, I think it would be worth it to look into being examined for ADHD, since it seems as though you have some issues that could be attributed to ADHD, although it could also be as a result of lacking energy due to energy management. And also if you do have untreated ADHD, then it ends up making your autism symptoms so much more intense and harder to deal with. I don't want to be morbid, but if you do present with suicidal ideation, self-harm or similarly serious issues, then that's a great way to get the treatment/examination you need. The medical system in various countries seems only really to react properly when you have an emergency. I was only looked into being diagnosed the first time when I thought I was a sociopath because I had treated someone in a way where they felt I had manipulated them, and I didn't care, and only then I wasn't fully diagnosed. The second time, I started having suicidal thoughts - essentially because of what I now see as a sustained shutdown + perfectionism - and only then was I properly diagnosed. I jumped the waiting list for treatment for ASD and ADD when things started to get a bit more... serious. So yeah, having problems you really shouldn't makes diagnosis/treatment possible faster. In any case, please don't put yourself down, it takes time and understanding to overcome your challenges. You are good enough, you do have value and you deserve to live a life you view as being happy and/or fulfilling. I don't know where you live, but if your government provides some sort of educational service for autistic people or for those diagnosed with ADHD, then I would highly recommend utilising it. Being able to talk to an educator about it - and possibly share with other people with the same conditions, if it is a class - can make it a lot easier to understand and implement information and techniques that helps with managing ASD and ADHD symptoms. TL;DR I hope you're okay, please don't be hard on yourself. They didn't rule out ADHD, and you describe issues that could be attributed to it, so it could be the root of the problem. Besides, you don't lose anything by arguing your case for it, and sometimes you really have to to get through to medical personnel. I know dealing with my autism would have been so much harder without my ADD treatment. Please, if you do have any serious issues like suicidial ideation or self-harm (first of all, I'm sorry if you do) then use it to get the treatment/examination you need. You are good enough as you are, I'm sure you make other people happy in your life and you clearly have a lot to offer, if you see yourself in this video. You deserve to live a life you view as happy and/or fulfilling. P.S. Haha, I always start writing these messages thinking it won't take that long or the message won't be that long. In the meantime I've written a novel in 30 minutes and written a summary xD
@@juliusfinkas thank you for your reply even though it's been a while. It's really nice to know that I am not alone. I actually haven't had any suicidal ideations in many, many years. I struggled with depression and high anxiety for all those years. My depression is rare and mild now even though I am currently not on medication, and while my anxiety is still an issue, it has dropped considerably. I moved into an apartment with my gf who also has autism, and we are both improving. I am a veteran , and the VA is covering the treatment I just started. They don't treat autism in the VA itself, but they cover the cost in community care.
@@juliusfinkas I hope that with treatment, I will be able to start working a real job again. Disability pays the bills, but it sure makes me feel like I was broken and of no value. I am confident that I am capable of employment again, but still needing to work through certain issues.
@@davidhorn996 I think you being motivated to do that makes a big difference. I'm glad you believe in yourself :) go for it definitely! I'm also struggling at work, but I'm trying to get better as well, and like yourself, I believe I am capable of getting and keeping a job that makes me happy. Unemployment certainly doesn't help when you're struggling with mental health, and you're capable of working. I get that sense of having no value. You do. Some times it's about doing stuff, and sometimes it seems to be about reminding yourself.
I definitely struggle with working memory. The other day I was thinking about what I was going to get to eat and completely forgot my wallet at home and didn't realize until I got to the store
I am the go to cake cutter at work because I am very precise with it and cut it into roughly equal pieces. Or well I was as long as we were working on site instead of WFH. XD
i wish everyone in my world knew these things too, or who even had in their minds that there are a differently enabled kind of person, that is, neuro divergent. NT’S don’t seem to think outside what is “their life experience” and it takes them being almost force-paired with an ND for them to widen their vision of how the world is pooulated, to some degree, by people who are “wired differently”.
Well, we are intense! Where on earth do I find people who have energy over for my own? Humor? ... makes people run for their lives, usually. Yes, people can sometimes laugh until they cry, but where on earth do you get in touch with such people?
I thought that memorizing all songs was normal to all people. Though I knew that I have some weird memory thing because I can memorize Japanese and Korean songs when I don't speak their language.
Lots of really good information!! I was just a bit distracted by the new style. Playful editing is cool. But this feels like slightly awkward masking in terms of borrowing mannerisms and style from other RU-vidrs you like. Bits that felt more relaxed and like you felt like a relief. Peppy sparkle & polished performance and being relaxed and authentic are not incompatible. It might just be me. It might just take a while to bed in, for you as a new style and for me to get used to it. But I worried about you pushing yourself out your comfort zone a little bit too hard 😉💗
Do you think it's interesting for colleagues to know about it ? There can be so many bad opinions about it especially since I'm a project manager :') Btw love you content
Don't like the hufflepuff sweater, since I am a afab enby and was directly attacked by JKR. But ok, came here to say something else. Which I forgot cause I hit my knee really hard. Auw. - Ohyea, the small detail thing. I like to compare it to baking. NT's go like, this is dough, simple straight forward. While the autist sees puff pastry, which are technically very thin layers of dough separated by butter and then folded and smashed, so it looks like the normal NT dough but it's not and once it's put in the oven the difference shows. The two act very different in practise. That's how a lot of things are different I think for us ND people. But the NT's are so convinced of their own righteousness they will deny the difference, sometimes even after the baking, aka when theory / plans go into action and we the autististics planned better and succeed in baking something nice and tasty that makes sense.
Strong moral compass? I guess so, but that does not mean we have the same compass. :) And it is rather a curse to feel guily of everything all the time because we know we allways mix up. Often I don't want to change because I don't have the energy and not the motivation after all these years of struggle, which make me feel even more bad. However, it is true that I often feel strong compastion for people who have to struggle to been heard and seen and are unfairly treated. Unfortunately, they are not always seen and people don't alwyas recognize the severity of the problem. Look how ex-muslims often are treated, for instance!
