A very good explanation of metta, grounded universal love emanating from oneself that is not dependent on attachment to others - that's how I understood it. Don't give up your ability to feel love when others act selfishly, agressively or foolishly - retain the joyous ability to express love to others and yourselves.
"A person betrays our trust so we decide we're not gonna love. That decision is made in the mind, not the heart. When that decision is made in the mind we close up our heart. When we do that we're half alive. That's half of us that's dead. Why do that to ourselves? We're depending again on the goodwill and lovingness of other people. There is only one thing to depend on, upon our own goodness and our own loving. We've got enough work to do to get that going, never mind what others do. We're constantly, through our reactions, buying in to the actions and thoughts and deeds of other people. What for? No need for that, we've got enough to do with ourselves. And by buying in to others peoples thoughts and speech and actions we also do not leave enough room to actually introspect in to ourselves, we're far too busy to look what others are doing to us. Totally irrelevant. They can only do it to us if we allow them to do it to us. If we don't allow it, what can they possibly do? Somebody get's angry at us and we feel upset by that, we've allowed that person to enter in to our own being. If we see that the anger belongs to the other person, all we need is compassion for that person's anger, that's all that's necessary. So if we really want to know what love is all about we need to recognize the fact that love is not dependent upon another person being loveable". - Ayya Khema
