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Banned From Happy Donuts / 23 Minutes of Ranting with False Peyote 

Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't
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Why does Lophophora diffusa resemble a St. Patrick's Day Donut that's been accidentally sat on? How does a plant evolve the photochemistry that it takes to be a spineless cactus in an often barren hot lowland desert in Mexico's Bajío region? What makes Astrophytum ornatum so ornate? Why is Euphorbia tirucalli called "pencil cactus" even though it's not a cactus? How did it get to be invasive here?
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26 авг 2024

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Комментарии : 118   
@loganmeo9531
@loganmeo9531 Месяц назад
Fiberglass in the urethra is a thought crime. I love your use of the english language never stop.
@Londonechoes
@Londonechoes Месяц назад
😂 It's hilarious
@mistaecco
@mistaecco 2 месяца назад
I totally did shoplift an optunia microdasys from home depot, and in pocketing it ended up with a wonderful fiberglass-y feeling on my entire hand foor the rest of the day. I now bring a fanny pack and a set of ziplock bags on my urban scavenging operations.
@omnirath
@omnirath Месяц назад
My grandpa who was a monster told me to use a pocket fan on one to cut the needles when I was very tiny, safe to say that to this day it was one of the worst evenings of my life, it was everywhere and unbearable
@Heavilymoderated
@Heavilymoderated Месяц назад
@@omnirathMy grandpa was a nice guy, but one time I asked him about a pepper plant he had growing, and he told me to try one, they aren’t very hot. I was like 6 so I grabbed one and started eating it. Turned out to be a habanero. I learned not to trust anyone that day. Was out of character for him.
@Cannastrophic
@Cannastrophic Месяц назад
😅​@@Heavilymoderated
@tree_relics
@tree_relics Месяц назад
That and Cereus peruvianus were my first plants at 4-5 years old. I learned young about glochids for a Midwestern boy.
@oakherder17
@oakherder17 Месяц назад
😂
@morningstar8187
@morningstar8187 Месяц назад
Everything is legal to grow if you ask the seed bank to mislabel the seeds. I love my Echinocactus williamsii.
@yaddahaysmarmalite4059
@yaddahaysmarmalite4059 Месяц назад
Who needs mislabeling when you can go for Lophophora decipiens? The whole point behind that name is no one knows what it is. Personally, I'd really like to see some dna studies on plants indicated as L. decipiens. I'm with Tony here: I find it odd that L. difusa and L. fricii aren't more common in cultivation in the US. They technically aren't illegal nor is the wtf L. decipiens. I find fricii to be prettier plants than williamsii anyways.
@DothBeEthan
@DothBeEthan 16 дней назад
​@@yaddahaysmarmalite4059they're not federally prohibited. But unfortunately all L. Species are illegal to grow in some states like California. I mean for me, it would be illegal to plant, cultivate, harvest, dry or process plants, but technically possessing seeds would be legal as long as they never germinated. It's funny that the entire L. Genus is prohibited, even the non-psychoactive ones, but I can grow other mescaline containing cacti without restriction. California's laws are backwards as hell.
@DothBeEthan
@DothBeEthan 16 дней назад
I mean they don't technically prohibit selling seeds to California as long as they are never germinated, who's to say that the natural range doesn't extend that far though. They may very well find newly discovered, naturally occuring populations of Lophophora fricii
@gloriacardenas2056
@gloriacardenas2056 Месяц назад
Todavía estoy viendo el vídeo y el peyote falso es muy bonito e interesante aunque no entiendo el idioma muchísimas gracias por subir esos vídeos de cactus me encanta casi todo 👍👍👍👍👌
@yaddahaysmarmalite4059
@yaddahaysmarmalite4059 Месяц назад
don't worry about it. there's not much language to understand. or worth understanding. unless getting kicked out of a Happy Donut is important to you.
@poisonouspotato1
@poisonouspotato1 Месяц назад
​@@yaddahaysmarmalite4059I guess missing out on some jokes is also quite a bother
@davidedgar2818
@davidedgar2818 Месяц назад
I love your sgn off🤙🤙🤙 when I first moved to Hawaii I had to watch myself. F&@# You is fighting words here, I had to explain tha F&@# You is a morning greeting to your neighbor in New York, where I grew up 😂😂😂 no harm meant braddah🤙🤙🤙
@roguebotanist
@roguebotanist Месяц назад
My fellow Texans are shocked when they encounter a New Yorker but I tell them he is being polite.
@katiekane5247
@katiekane5247 Месяц назад
Disturbing decrease in pollinators in north Georgia and insane UV lately. Stuff is blooming way early. Thanks for showing me things I'd never have gotten to appreciate on my own. Love them smooshy Lofs
@katiekane5247
@katiekane5247 Месяц назад
Loph FFS
@Heavilymoderated
@Heavilymoderated Месяц назад
I get that impulse to take rocks. I have almost inadvertently wound up with a ton of them laying around my house.
@jackstone4291
@jackstone4291 Месяц назад
You gotta love a rock though right?! Same here.
@thomaseriksen6885
@thomaseriksen6885 Месяц назад
Arrange them in the garden for aesthetic purposes and save space
@ronm3245
@ronm3245 Месяц назад
I also have rocks that I brought home. A real nice chunk of light gray obsidian, a block of almost pure anorthite, plus a bit of a very large geode encrusted with vanadinite. They really make the best people. No complaining, always there.
@Toddis
@Toddis Месяц назад
Top notch commentary 👍
@junkettarp8942
@junkettarp8942 Месяц назад
How do you guys do it???...Yet another profound presentation by Tony and crew skillfully designed to get us off the lounge and into the garden....We might even go for a swim down the dam.
@organicpharming6181
@organicpharming6181 Месяц назад
Can't get enough of the Loph content!
@thelegion_within
@thelegion_within Месяц назад
those red thorns on that cactus were pretty neat! happy 4th!
@farrahupson
@farrahupson Месяц назад
Love this channel & all the cactus.
@taleandclawrock2606
@taleandclawrock2606 Месяц назад
Ants may have nuptial flights of new virgin queens and fertile male drones, they come out around a thunderstorm, the extra humidity assists the establishments of new ant domains.❤
@lacroix3931
@lacroix3931 Месяц назад
This is truly the greatest channel on RU-vid
@AlaskanInsights
@AlaskanInsights Месяц назад
LOL, we ate a bunch of some cactus once... didn't get high but we could see in the dark.
@thothbaboon
@thothbaboon Месяц назад
The red spines are really interesting, thanks for sharing that fact.
@wizewizard1840
@wizewizard1840 Месяц назад
I love your videos! I love the beauty you are showing and I love the endless rambling and ranting. Your voice is so nice to listen to. Greetings from my Lophophoras here in Germany! Love seeing them in habitat in your videos!
@oakherder17
@oakherder17 Месяц назад
The voice is amazing, never hear anything like it here in South australia XD
@mrpricklythecactus
@mrpricklythecactus Месяц назад
I'd be so nervous walking around there! Or anywhere ever. Don't want to step on the little guys! 🏜️
@noxot13
@noxot13 Месяц назад
I can't believe that those large flightless birds in australia ate the invasive opuntia, some of the things other animals will or can eat is pretty crazy. apparently the australians got ride of the problem with a moth which in the USA is causing problems for some opuntia in some parts.
@johnwoodrich8179
@johnwoodrich8179 Месяц назад
Beautiful. Great show.
@roberte8273
@roberte8273 Месяц назад
Thank you for another informative, irreverant, and brutally eloquent presentation.
@moefuggerr2970
@moefuggerr2970 Месяц назад
Someone peed there.
@bugz000
@bugz000 Месяц назад
i think we're listening to the guy who peed there
@grouch0424
@grouch0424 Месяц назад
You should do an episode of you and Michael Rapaport venturing through talking shit about every invasive!!!!! 😂😂😂
@Ludvig11
@Ludvig11 2 месяца назад
Bless the rains in México (but not too much...) I do think some colors out there has an underappreciated beauty to it.
@adamsd86
@adamsd86 Месяц назад
Potentially dumb but sincere question: is it possible the short (and admittedly corny) wall around the eight-foot cactus helps prevent erosion that would eventually destabilize it? Or is that thing just rooted deep af and the wall is pointless? Another theory: maybe it discourages people from fucking with it by signaling that the cactus is valued/monitored?? I guess I’m just trying to square the corniness of the wall with the fact that whoever built it was at least smart enough to appreciate the cactus as something unique.
@Toddis
@Toddis Месяц назад
High elevation? He was breathing harder than usual And it's fusion going on in the sun 🌞 🎶"The sun is a mass of incandescent gas, a gigantic nuclear furnace Where Hydrogen is fused into Helium at a temperature of millions of degrees" 🎶
@colettehaskell9133
@colettehaskell9133 Месяц назад
5280!!! Me too! Greetings from Denver you dapper bastard xox thanks for the soul saving videos ❤
@Toddis
@Toddis Месяц назад
Joey bringin the rain 🌧️ 💪
@douglascoleman5588
@douglascoleman5588 Месяц назад
The intro is like the start of a marathon or 5k. Everyone is just running together, then it starts getting a little more quiet and spread out. The noise in the beginning of a big race with real competition is a whole drug for anyone who ends up in the front of the pack.
@oakherder17
@oakherder17 Месяц назад
I move rocks with me too. Was couch surfing for eighteen months and just kept dragging massive garden rocks around. They look amazing in my tiny court yard garden now. Have a real sense of age and gravitas and character in this new build.
@goldenwithahintofboss8787
@goldenwithahintofboss8787 Месяц назад
😂😂 so funny today. Thanks for the fluffy chits.
@danstotland6386
@danstotland6386 Месяц назад
To Hell with Happy Donuts, don't go there!
@erikdeeNOSPELLSNO
@erikdeeNOSPELLSNO Месяц назад
It's amazing how most poisonous, venomous, nasty ass thorned biting creatures are in hot climates...
@dhaktizero4406
@dhaktizero4406 Месяц назад
what would happen if you accidentally dropped some baking soda on the ground near those chlorotic diffusa is it not a chemistry problem when nitrogen is locked up or do they need a bacteria or soil fungus to help them? we are doing bad at gardening someone call the paraplantmedics this one needs fluids stat!
@jerrodbeck1799
@jerrodbeck1799 Месяц назад
Hahah cactus fiberglass in your urethra ouch👍🏻
@NanaWilson-px9ij
@NanaWilson-px9ij Месяц назад
Awesome.
@allenzophy4262
@allenzophy4262 Месяц назад
Happy 4th Joey. GFYS, Bye!😅
@NORATECHNOLOGIES
@NORATECHNOLOGIES Месяц назад
Great channel,
@hestheMaster
@hestheMaster Месяц назад
I came to see the fluffy shitz and wasn't disappointed.
@ZE308AC
@ZE308AC Месяц назад
I like the fluffy shits from natives plants
@yaddahaysmarmalite4059
@yaddahaysmarmalite4059 Месяц назад
if I was with you on that trip, I would have been so tempted to grab some of those rocks. those were some cool rocks. eh, the L. difusa and A. ornatum was nice to. but those rocks!! There's a local geology club I keep thinking of hooking up with but I'm already busy with the local astronomy club. Tony, if I ever come to visit you, I'm bringing a telescope. You show me plants; I'll show you stars. Deal?
@machankinson1795
@machankinson1795 Месяц назад
“Its fucking comedic… it’s brutal”
@hranko3143
@hranko3143 Месяц назад
Badaboop, badabing, we got some cactus heyah.
@lillith665
@lillith665 Месяц назад
zomg keep talkin' geological cretaceous calcareous alluvium...sew hawt
@Anubis30224
@Anubis30224 Месяц назад
After how shit the political situation in America is right now, i really fucking needed this.
@veteranscannabisadvocacygr5401
@veteranscannabisadvocacygr5401 Месяц назад
✨🇺🇸 HAPPY 4th Of July Independence Day 🎆 “Freedom is just another word for nothing left to lose “🎇
@Padraic-uq3sh
@Padraic-uq3sh Месяц назад
What's all that grey matter on the bottom half of that Opuntia microdasys?
@darranwilkins4648
@darranwilkins4648 Месяц назад
kin yes more crime pays fella gotta get to my neck woods eccosse just silly and free roaming ❤
@jdsevolvingideas
@jdsevolvingideas Месяц назад
Would love so to see some nice money shots of da queen
@lillith665
@lillith665 Месяц назад
LOL "my old friend Tasajillo....gaahhhhh!" nooooo I am totally noooot inhaling any dibenzopyrans.
@quinokin8954
@quinokin8954 Месяц назад
Just gotta say that you're right on both fronts about the sun: it's both fusion AND fision, but fusion is predominant :)
@bobbiechinn9578
@bobbiechinn9578 Месяц назад
You know the ants farm mealies and aphids on anything they can now come on, what the shit
@canadiangemstones7636
@canadiangemstones7636 Месяц назад
6:40 breccia oh my!
@krishead2410
@krishead2410 Месяц назад
Love lophophora
@analogtom
@analogtom Месяц назад
Fence post looks like some type of foam base…
@dhaktizero4406
@dhaktizero4406 Месяц назад
we've seen the grafting we know they can be farmed with love when do we get to eat feast on them already it does not have to tear the doors off the hinges to be good medicine or good eating you give your liver a thousand shiny new tools for christmas see what fun it can have giving these gifts to the other organs dont be an ebenezer dont scrooge us let's permaculture this and fresh they taste pretty good all sun warmed little globes of sweet jelly in a gritty fruit leather like matrix or maybe they only taste good if you grow them yourself time for some fun science!
@boxcutter0
@boxcutter0 Месяц назад
Ever camp in a place like this, and water some of the plants on day one, and watch them wake up over the following days?
@my_post_traumatic_growth
@my_post_traumatic_growth Месяц назад
What kind of boots are you wearing because I would be sliding down that scree at :53 and you are gaining in elevation every millisecond with each step?
@kavalkid1
@kavalkid1 Месяц назад
Love you forever and always!
@5attva
@5attva Месяц назад
In the desert sw. it did not necessarily get hotter. The hottest days shortened actually and it gets less rain and snow than before, which is the only true part. For some reason people equate hot, being the reason for less precipitation. As a matter of fact, it gets the most rain in the hot summer days. Also, it gets these bizarre days where the temperature drops 50 degrees in one day and it gets cold. Then back to hot.
@larrikinful
@larrikinful Месяц назад
No one needs to do anything with lophophora when we have abundant trichocereus.
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt Месяц назад
Not sure if you can read or not but this Lophophora species doesn't even contain any significant amount of psychoactive alkaloids.
@Suitswonderland
@Suitswonderland Месяц назад
Its been cold and wet in Scotland all spring and so far summer, non stop icy cold artic winds and maybe you lucky and get some sun before the Island starts giving us its own pride parade.
@christianhunt7382
@christianhunt7382 Месяц назад
People should put cool stuff in environments that would fossilize well. Besides plastics bags and trash, more like things that wouldn't have a chance otherwise
@4eyefoxbodyfanclub625
@4eyefoxbodyfanclub625 Месяц назад
19:15 OMG!!!.... will ya keep ya hands of the cacti?! You like a little kid, gots to touch everything! If ya not gonna plant them seeds, then keep ya hands off ya crazy Italian! Ya made the grub homeless, dont disturb nature!
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt Месяц назад
Relax. Take your meds
@vcuauhtemoc
@vcuauhtemoc Месяц назад
I've definitely peed in a happy donut
@ByronGiant
@ByronGiant Месяц назад
Thanks Uncle Ton'
@26hurban
@26hurban Месяц назад
Why ya huffin n puffin? 😂❤😂
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt Месяц назад
Huffin fahts
@jackwood8307
@jackwood8307 Месяц назад
@taleandclawrock2606
@taleandclawrock2606 Месяц назад
You should visit Ants Canada😍
@fordprefect80
@fordprefect80 Месяц назад
Speaking of Happy Donut. I thought all shops were closed and boarded up in the Bay Area?
@billpuppies
@billpuppies Месяц назад
I'm getting the extra large box of Fluffy Shits!
@drewamasterpiece5268
@drewamasterpiece5268 Месяц назад
Ask a Sanoran toad.
@TimTimTomTom
@TimTimTomTom 24 дня назад
Is that crested fasciation(sp) at 11:35, or just how they are?
@youtubeaccount931
@youtubeaccount931 Месяц назад
i'd still eat it and get false enlightened
@oh5148
@oh5148 Месяц назад
Let me get a list of the types of lophs I can legally grow in tx
@rasdan_69
@rasdan_69 Месяц назад
what does biznaga mean?
@Westbound100
@Westbound100 Месяц назад
👍👍👍👍👍
@lillith665
@lillith665 Месяц назад
I think you underestimate the awesomocity of clouds, really.
@HyrimBot
@HyrimBot Месяц назад
it says they can make gasoline with the latex from that pencil cactus tree so somebody should market it as "plant based" gas for vegan cars.
@infinidimensionalinfinitie5021
@infinidimensionalinfinitie5021 Месяц назад
y/our kiddin';
@lukehahn4489
@lukehahn4489 Месяц назад
I'm getting a ruler tattoo on my finger then start a youtube channel "Crime pays and so do lawns" all about mono-culture grasses, the benefits of aerating, mower reviews, pesticides, the cultural significance of manicured green turf, etc. My catch phrase, "Take care of your lawn ya prick!" What ya think of that Tony?
@lillith665
@lillith665 Месяц назад
veiny limestone is rad, though there are happy donuts in WA but I don't think they're really a chain, they're just all over. Like Nasai Teriyaki? that's deer or goat poop, btw I wanna know more about mesquite evolution! (pretty please?)
@larrikinful
@larrikinful Месяц назад
Yous guys are stealing seeds.
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt
@CrimePaysButBotanyDoesnt Месяц назад
1. None of these were even fruiting at the time, dummy. 2. I'm not opposed to people taking seeds so long as they scatter some for the plants, as well, unless regeneration is extremely limited and a population or species is rare. 3. Don't blow up my comments section with idiotic comments and accusations
@Ntheonaut
@Ntheonaut Месяц назад
1-800-fluffy-shits 😂
@PenntuckytheCrag
@PenntuckytheCrag Месяц назад
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