Barely Surviving 

[Verse 1]
Today I'm not out "getting it"
Not hustling and grindin'
Nor working that 9 to 5 just to keep the lights on
No, today I'm barely surviving
Put all my thoughts on these lines and
Struggling to make a coherent sentence (coherent sentence)
So much I need to say
Too much pain between the pages
And the chapters I've already read
[Pre-Chorus]
I keep reading them
Put it down
No, let it out
No, let them go
But you can't cause they are your past
And your past is who you are
Or is it?
[Chorus]
Your parents, your friends, your old teachers
Guidance from preachers telling you you're going to hell
Fragile now-not like my masculinity-or do I have any of that?
Who am I to you and does it even matter-who I am to me?
[Verse 2]
Tongue-tieing proverbial justice, it's my masterpiece
My poetry, my shattered dreams
Today I'm not your motivation
Validations are like drugs
And maybe I don't need it
But then maybe I do
[Pre-Chorus]
Am I any good at anything, why was I never good enough for you? ex-lovers, and ex-friends
Why are your memories haunting me?
Why do I let them in?
[Chorus]
Today I'm not out "getting it"
Not hustling and grindin'
Nor working that 9 to 5 just to keep the lights on
No, today I'm barely surviving
Put all my thoughts on these lines and
Struggling to make a coherent sentence
[Bridge]
So much I need to say (need to say)
Too much pain between the pages (the pages)
And the chapters I've already read
[Outro]
I keep reading them
Put it down
No, let it out
No, let them go
But you can't cause they are your past
And your past is who you are
Guess I'll save the rest for another day