I just delivered my daughter stillborn a couple of weeks ago and I'm so glad I agreed to have a vaginal delivery with an epidural. My first instinct was to just get a C-section but they said it would be better for my future deliveries not to. It really did give me a sense of closure and the level of the epidural medication was adjustable so I kept it low and I was able to move my legs and feel when I was having contractions and push without coaching, and I liked having control over the process. I was fully aware and got to hold her right away and it did make me feel more like a mom.
I delivered my daughter stillborn on September 17 and had the same experience. I was horrified when they told me I still had to deliver her vaginally but it ended up being a beautiful experience even through the sadness. I’ll love my daughter Aurora Rae for eternity and cherish the time I had with her. Im so thankful for the nurses and doctors and medical care. Sending much love and light to you my sister.
I’m so glad my doctor strongly discouraged me for a c section even tho I was begging for one and for my future pregnancies I was so so grateful she basically said no. So grateful
I regret contributing (not much, thankfully() to Return to Zero after watching this video. I agree that vaginal delivery is beneficial in this situation, but mothers should be given a choice. I guess this is something we need to start discussing with our obstetricians and midwives: if my baby dies before they are born, will I have a choice of how I deliver? Every day, mothers have unnecessary, elective c-sections for their healthy babies. Why shouldn't a mother whose baby has passed have the same choice?
The point here is that very often after a stillbirth a woman will go on to have one or more healthy children. This being said, a VBAC (vaginal birth after c-section) can be far more dangerous than a vaginal birth after not having had a previous c-section. Of course, women have a choice in how they deliver a deceased baby, however a vaginal birth is encouraged for the previously mentioned reason & for the much quicker & less complicated recovery time & process of a vaginal birth. A mom will already be dealing with grief, so why add to the emotional pain with a longer & more intense healing process after c-section. That's the message here, I hope this is clarifying!
It’s really hard to say. I am in the same boat. 2 weeks postpartum. Some ppl have gotten pregnant 1 month after stillbirth but from what I am reading 3-6 months after is a good time depending on how far along you were when stillbirth occurred. I am giving my body 2 months to get healed and already started prenatals and ovulation tracking and fertility gummies to help get my body strong for next pregnancy.
I’m sorry I don’t want to be rude and bless all the sweet babies who didn’t make it but I won’t want to go through labor because it not even worth it it hard hearing that new I don’t think the mom or even her spouse should have to go through waiting to get the baby out when they know it sadly is gone before it born I would just want a c section
I didn’t have a choice I was trying to save my baby, cat 1 emergency c sec was done and I was put to sleep but I would of gone through hanything at that time if it meant I could if saved him but Allah swt had another plan for my angel, it never gets easy, it’s only been 4months does it ever get easier? There’s not a day that passes that I don’t remember him.
We are so sorry for your loss of your precious baby. We want you to know that you are not alone, and one day it will be possible to find joy again. Our website has resources, information, support, and community for connecting with bereaved parents - rtzhope.org
I think it's disgusting that someone is forced to have a vaginal birth when they don't want one. That they are pushed into having one. That they don't have a choice in the matter🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
Hi Catherine, The fact that we have to deliver a baby who has died is against everything we know and probably the hardest thing we will ever have to do. Even though it's better for one physically to deliver vaginally, it's also important to look at the emotional and trauma implications in the situation and not offer a choice. I am so very sorry for your experience. Sending love, Kiley
When I had late miscarriage, I was just screaming- "get this thing out of me! Now!!!". I demanded c-section, I didn't want to go through any pain, I wanted morphine, and anything that would put me into deep sleep. As soon as I knew there was no heart beat, I didn't consider it a baby anymore, more like something harmful, like a tumor, that needed to be removed. Because if I didn't it would kill me.
I am so very sorry for your loss. It is scary to have our baby inside of us when we know they are not alive. I think that is a very common response - to want the baby out. It can be helpful to have a nurse or social worker who acts as a bereavement guide. We never expect to be in this situation and have no idea how to respond or what to do. Sending love to you.
Hi sis i also had a c section with dead twins at 5th month of my pregnancy and worried about my future can you guide me about your experience after c section?