Wait! 4:50 That girl saying her feminist BS. She said that back in the day women who married where considered property and couldn't work. When in the hell did black women never work. Black men and women who slaved in the field together, got freed together and then had to BOTH work in order just to make ends meats after slavery had ending. Black men and women both worked of the farm from day to night after being freed from slavery. Black ow,en have never been oppressed by black men! That's is feminist BS!
Growing up, "everyone" in my extended family was always married. It was very much unacceptable to have a child outside of marriage in the family. My grandmother didn't tolerate it and that's the way it stayed until my generation entered adulthood. When it did change, and there were divorced moms in the family, and eventually never-married mothers and fathers, I felt incredibly saddened and even let down by it. I realize "plans go astray" - maybe an originally intact two parent household divorces - but I disagree with those who willfully elect to give children single parent lives as if "it doesn't matter".
Great grandparents married 60 years. Grandparents married 52 years. My parents married 35 years. Myself married for almost a year. I agree black women are getting married older but they are getting married.
There's no need for men to get married anymore because it doesn't benefit them. I for one am not making that mistake, and men in general should know if the marriage doesn't work out, it's men who get the raw deal in the divorce courts. Keep your tool zipped up guys and don't fall for this trap as many of you have already. Learn from your mistakes.
Eh, I don't care. I think people blow relationships out of proportion. They act like not getting married makes you a failure in life. Newsflash: It doesn't. People can find happiness in other things, they just don't want to. If I get married cool, if not that's fine too. However, these days I just don't want to be bothered with anyone. Soooooo...... *shrugs*
Okay, I"m an engaged black woman and here is where I see the problem in our community. We are focused on the wrong things when it comes to finding a mate. I hear women saying "oh, well I can't marry him, because he doesn't make enough," and I"m hearing men saying "Oh but her hair is not real and her skin isn't light enough" are you effing kidding me? What kind of planet does my race live on? I love my people, but ya'll have some serious problems. No where in the bible does it say that a man should make a certain amount of money, before he is able to marry and no where in the bible does it say that if a woman's skin complexion isn't lighter than a brown paper bag or doesn't have real hair; she's not marriage material. You all need to get your crap together sistas and brothers and right now, because this madness has got to stop! I'm a black woman, engaged to a wonderful black man, whom I love unconditionally and yes, I have a masters degree and he does not, but you know what? He treats me alot better than those lawyers and doctors that I met while in graduate school. The black men who had the Masters and doctorate degrees, thought that they were too good to settle down and why? Because they had about 5 women chasing 1 black man and I was not willing to play the game and become just ONE of their sidekick lackys. Ladies, wake up! It's not about degrees; trust me.
Folks have been indoctrinated by television into these imaginary ideas of what a good life is supposed to be like. Everyone wants to live a basketball wives mcmansion existence. I don't know why they haven't figured out since the 2008 housing crash that it's all just pretend. Most people are struggling while pretending to have it all together.
Judah descendant I know this is a year late sis, but a year later it's getting even worse. I have always agreeded that money or statues over morals and values is recepie for a overcooked relationship ... We as women have lost our way do to the examples we have been exsposed to or experience from our men it's starts from a young age either you have a father in the home or not and let's just say what type of father did you have even if he is in the home if mom had some type of income and dad had the overall income than you see women like you see in this video that seen their father do or say things and their mothers sat and did nothing about it and in turn those girls grow up just like you see these sisters and than on the flip side you have women that grow up without a father left to her own destruction even if she turned out ok these are those women as well in these videos. These men long ago sis have lost their way and caused this and these women are a result of that.. NEVER did WE take into account and EVEN here in 2017 that WE have chased EVERYTHING such as: money statues cars material and degrees in exchange for love and value and in turn ZERO morals. We have been horribly FOCUSED just like you said sis on the WRONG thing how could you fix a dying person without focusing on the cause and the effects first. Our people NEVER considered READING the very thing that would get US all in check and allow us to move on ONE accord Wich those answers are found like you stated in the BIBLE.. OUR sisters and brothers are so consumed with the accomplishments that they make in this life and got the NERVE to call themselves BLESSED but is doing ZERO for anybody else other then themselves and their click their around to accomplish the same things. It has been deeply rooted in us that our accomplishments means to out shine each other because rather your a sister or brother the outside NATION is not being effected by our self loving accomplishments you can't out shine someone in a home that they either took from you or that you don't own. So who are you trying to out do YOURSELF and the people that look like you? Nothing in this life is more important if you can't help others or have someone to share it with.. we the children of The HIGHEST under and inner stand that. My prayers is that the rest of my brothers and sisters that has accomplished alot have patience with the relationships that their in and realize if you had patience enough to go to college and get that house job and cars you ought to have the same patience for the women or man your dealing with because let's be CLEAR none of us is running the place here on earth WE call home no matter what WE accomplish WORLDWIDE. Let's get it together F A M I L L Y... Shalom sis... I will PATIENCELY wait until The MOST HIGH sends me a husband and humbly except his love for me as he gets his directions from on HIGH whom I serve. HALLELUYAH!!
Wait. Did that girl really say that there are 25 black women to 1 black man, therefore, many black women aren't going to get married? Then date other races hunny. I mean, really? Your just going to sit around and hope you get picked LoL!
As a Black Man I don't care for getting married. Honestly, I believe marriage is on a woman's wish list. If a man really loves a woman he will be with her married or not. But as long as we have the same laws of marriage in place I will always think twice. Logically thinking, not everything works out. No matter how much you love someone. That goes for marriages as well. Not saying marriages can't be successful. Just saying it seems that the men have a lot more to lose.
What do men have to loose in a marriage? If women refused to be with a man with out marriage what would you gain? if women stopped having babies out of wedlock what would you gain? She would certainly gain 18 years of freedom. Women should stop selling themselves on the cheap to men who refuse to marry or respect them. This is why families demanded dowry marriage and enforced them.
Men have everything to lose. Themselves, money, children, etc. Are you serious? I as a man, gain a lot from a woman being with me without marriage. I can still do what I want with no hassle or nagging.Plus if women stop having babies out of wedlock you wouldn't see these kids killing themselves or not coming to their full potential because there dads are not there. You right women should stop being so careless. But don't make excuses for them. They need to take accountability for their own actions. This is not law and order svu. These women choose men and decide to have unprotected sex. It takes two. I never in my life felt that a woman should complete me. Born alone will go out alone. No woman would ever change that. I love my ladies but shit is fucked up out here.
Freetown2006 The older I get as a woman I don't really see the point of marriage. I feel as I woman I would lose way more than a man ever could. Society makes women feel like they are SUPPOSED to get married and have children. Men don't have to worry about such things.
I don't want to believe this but i'm 24 and a lot of my non Black female friends are getting engaged, some are married already. However my Black female friends are still single or a single mom. Maybe I don't get out much but I hope I don't end up that way.
The reasons why BW are not getting married is simple. There's not enough black men to go around there are more than 2 million more BW than BM. And considering the high numbers of BM interracially dating and marrying other races, high BM incarceration rates and BM simply not valuing marriage and not looking at it as a necessity anymore it limits BW's dating pool. Maybe this clip will help you understand ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-OLRxpkk-4cs.html
This_Is_War that’s why I deleted my comment. I don’t have the time or energy to debate this annoying topic. Black women aren’t feminine black women arent marriage material ok 👌🏽 got it thanks 🙄
Tiffany D at 24 you want marriage? Have fun while you can young sista. Theirs lots more to worrie about an when your NOT LOOKING OR WAITING he will come
People always telling us what we are and what we do and dont do but some of these "things we dont do" is bull. We do it ALL and we are VERY VERY VERY GOOD AT IT
I've seen a lot of black women, women in general, falling for or trying to change Mr. Wrong and friend-zoning "Mr. Right". If we could just reverse that little habit....
I've been married to a Jamaican almost 5 years now! There are many black men out there ladies!!! Don't lose hope. One thing you might need to do is re-define what you think a successful marriage looks like. I have a college degree, soon to start a master's and while he doesn't, I know he's a very hard working , kind , loving and sensitive man who will always support me and make a way to take care of his family. We work together to make our marriage what we want it to be.
I don't know a lot of black men who want to get married. Black people seem to get married when they are middle-aged, which defeats the point of marriage considering that at that time females at this point reach biological limits in terms of childbearing and experience hormonal changes.
Part of it is from experience, is that Black Women in their golden ages of 18-30 they play a lot of games. they get knock up by a thug, or just play like hay I'm in the driver seat listen and obey. in so what ends up happening is about time their around 33 or so then they go checking for the guys who aren't necessarily looking for them. now the prison complex has put a serious dent on men out here, and this was by design ladies. like the Egyptian King said kill the male spare the female that,s exactly what took place.
LOL @ "10 kids" I couldn't agree more. I can't help but be disappointed when I see these sorts of videos. The amount of covert (and not so covert) mudslinging that occurs between the sexes is really disappointing. Particularly, in the Black (American) community, men and women seem to enjoy redeeming their self-esteem at the expense of the opposite sex. There's this underlying current of "I can do better without you" on both sides of the equation. And it all just really looks like posturing to me, because the pressure of appearing like they're living this great winning life weighs on people who many at times feel extremely empty inside. "There aren't really any marriageable men where I live" "Black women are not very loving" etc... All of that reeks of low self-esteem so profound that folks are really prepared to cover their fellow sisters and brothers in poo just so that they can feel like their inability to form relationships is solely because of the opposite sex.
Innocent Bystander I used to always say that men are evil and hopeless because of my negative experiences but them but i realized that Dad and my brothers are very nice men who are in my life and plus I know a lot of great guys but I just used that as a way of subconsciously explaining why my love life sucked.
Sultry Roses I think that is courageous of you to have taken a step back and assumed a more objective perspective. It isn't always easy to question one's deepest most heartfelt feelings. Has your love life improved?
I am black, I am from Canada, I am educated and I have a career, but outside of Canada. I have no criminal records. But I do not consider myself marriagable because no woman wants to be with me. No wonder I have been to Thailand 9 times.
actually, i stand corrected, a recent study by two Black university professors, blew the numbers out of the water. I said 63%, they said 75% and the number gets higher and higher the more the woman gets education, which stands to reason, a smarter woman would be invested in having a family more than a lower class woman. I made a video listing the source. I knew Black marriage was at 80% in the 70s but it lasted into the 80s as well. most of the stats are lies.
@@Daniel-xp1jy because the men they chose weren't quality men to begin with. The initiation of divorce rate simply reflects women waking up to that fact. They not putting up with no mo BS! They got the means to provide for themselves so the question becomes why stay with someone who doesn't want to treat you well?
At the end of the day, you can only date whose dating you. Interracial dating is not as big in these parts are people make it out to be. Most people still date their own. And if you're not naturally attracted to another race of man, then you can't really change that.
@ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-7s7efFXED9U.htmlm25s wow I'm glad she broke down the findings of that particular study because people have been using it to perpetuate this stereotype that we (black women) are, for some odd reason, not marriage material.
I would love to know how many males that have commented were raised by single black mothers? Have you ever talked to your mothers about why there were no men in the home? I am more interested in that than anything else.
Black folk do get married, where I'm from they get married all the time. So it's more of an issue of is she earning enough over here. Noticed white men marrying white women weather she earns more then he does, earns average amount of money or doesn't work. Many white folk get married much more often. For black people it seems to be about weather the woman and the man are compatible even in finances. So it's more likely they marry someone that out earns them or earns the same amount of money as they are. This throws the notion of physical attractiveness as well as emotional comparability slightly out of the picture but those points don't seem very important for black people cause they could still be happy. I know many black couples and white couples, I have met one black stay at home mom and a few white stay at home moms so those are things that made me think allot about how black people view marriage. Why black people marry later, when the woman is done studying and all that as well as the man. I personally think when women are young and fertile they should marry but if they don't then they should be allowed to pursue other things in life. I just hope that gave you an idea of why many black people don't get married.
The delusion is stroooong lol time will make them understand when their body will be destroyed by work they will look at their phd and just laught and say they were right.
Like ima get married to someone that think just because they got money and feel empowered. But I will say this as soon as you hit 30 it's over for most of those women
Thanks 'Black Folk Don't'. This is the second episode I have watched, and enjoyed the opportunity for thought engagement. I will look at others. Keep up the good works. Other races like mine, Anglo-Saxon, can easily put an arms length distance between ourselves and other Anglo-Saxons who are bad people. (Please do not assume I am not aware of the sociologically induced problems suffered by innocent people. We must help them overcome, not add to their challenges.) Upper and lower class division would be a way to differentiate. But in the auspice of prejudice against blacks, it seems as if this distancing for the Black race was not allowed by Anglo-Saxon and other communities. (The base of prejudice.) Kudos to 'Black Folk Don't' ... Your wisdom exceeds that of most of my experiences with the human race. All that means is that I am not easily impressed. Now, do a program on how we can reach out to those sociologically challenged, and improve their lives. Its funny, the more good you do the more you are expected to do. But I would bet that does not scare you.
The mind of the black woman has evolved she wants more, knows she can have more, do more, with whomever and this intimidates the black man to a degree especially those who love to hate us. This shows when the societal notion that we're so undesirable by other races of men that so many black men seem to buy into plays against them when we're seen dating and even marrying outside of our race and the focus and end goal to our lives is not marriage.
Let me guess everyone in this interview was college educated. Let me guess everyone in this interview is middle to uppermiddle class Black Folks need to stop acting as if these statistics don't mean anything (some of you) because they do have validity. If you want to be married allow yourself to get married. If you want to be married make it a priority. If it is not you will not get married you will not stay married. You can't hold you blackness above your identity has a human being and recognize that if you need or want someone you need to make it known by treating them thusly
In today's society, it seems easy to say black people don't get married because so many things affect the decision to get married and the marriage. For instance pursuing careers, marrying a different race (which really doesn't matter), or having different dynamics that constitute marriage make marriages more vague. In yesteryear, marriage weren't always concrete or even ceremonial. Life-long commitments are the epitome of marriages, and whether past or present black people illustrate that.
And most well-heeled, educated black women think men like YOU are a raw deal. That is why they are marrying white men, Asian men, ANYONE except men like you.
Im thinking its because allot of us dont want to marry each other...i think more BW and BM cant stand each other than less and we have more preferene to marry another race..
Its just like saying a video that is about how do you make the best chicken breast or salmon fillet, and somebody comments "im vegan, i dont need those! so yeah!" - Its just a waste of everyones time involved...
Ahhh *deep sigh* 40 years ago this wasn't the case but nowadays this is becoming the truth more and more. Hopefully they won't start putting a picture of a black person near the definition of 'bastard' in the Webster's or the Oxford Illustrated Dictionary.
I know. I am a black woman, I know this happens especially with the younger generation. I just wish they touched on the subject because it seems like SO many of these videos don't really like to talk about it.
Hardest job ever had ! 21 years still going-but would never do it again. Never cheated ,professional male, doing the right thing,but so many factors.Don't do it !
*+Jamal Jones* _"Okay black women define eligible black men?"_ Better yet, don't. Women are not owed a man! Women are not owed marriage! A relationship (trust) is something one must earn.
God ordains marriage genesis 2:18 & genesis 2:24. God doesn't want people to be alone. Most women & men have the option to marry & have children or to remain single. Women are to support men not to do it all. If single then, chaste & celibate in service to God w/o distraction. Marriage is advised for those who burn with sexual lust that it becomes a distraction. If one is meant to be single they will not have such sexual lusts & sexual distractions. This is the Word of the Divine Creator! Observe all the trouble once folk strayed from this design. Man's way is disastrous the way of God is the right way.
As a black man with a doctorate in Psychology, im going to tell you this, dont get married at all. Even if you do, become entrepreneurial, get some cash, have a prenup, and control your girl. Im telling you as a clinical psychologist, i have had so many cases of affairs by women and the thing they had in common is that they made more than their man. Women practice a preferential mating system call Hypergamy and they dont even know it
A lot of people don't like getting married even if they're in a relationship because in the past marriage wasn't a big deal so unless they're asked they wouldn't say yes. A lot of people don't come from married households and perhaps just have parents who never married. Marriages can cost money from the party and some people aren't willing or family/friend drama like we're going to be on blast so if we break up everyone will know even the Feds.
That might be the case for african americans hardly getting married. However Carribean british people are getting married . Im married with my wife 30 years. Both our parents were married.
...religious standpoint. The Superman, Malcom X, Willliam Wallace,, and MLK in me has guided me. And will continue to do so. Even if I grow old with no family, i'll adopt if I have too. But, I will pass that who I am on to a child.
In our defense,many African-American women don't refuse to date other races. Some prefer it! But sometimes I feel as if being in a relationship with a black man is looked down on.You can't help who you fall in love with whether he happens to be black, white, Hispanic, Asian, etc. Being ignored like crap isn't limited to black men. You can go date someone of another race and get treated the same way. As long as you are being treated with respect and are happy I don't think race really matters.
A lot of us don’t understand the dynamics of marriage and when to keep quiet and let your partner win. I also think modern feminism has ruined the dynamics. Women should not compete with their men, men and women are not the same we are designed to compliment each other. None of us are blameless it’s hard for men to be out earned by their wives but that’s life.
I stop did believe in marriage a long time ago. Marriage isn't what it use to be 96%of marriages fail. Stay single live free and drink hard and have fun and make money!!!
Let me be Frank, in todays world...whole generations Will not marry..why??? Because we (especially black people), just not learned how to commit..also because of slavery "Willy Lynch syndrome" etc, etc, etc. If we do not even commit our lives to our Lord and Saviour who created us and created the first institution which is called marriage. Marriage is the cornerstone of life. From there on all other institutes emerge. But we want to do our own free will. This is the reason why, we cheat, we want to do whatever we want. We Just want to live our lives thinking we know everthing, while all along we dont know nothing. Because if we don't even want to know our own Creator our own Father, how in the world can we ...live, love, do business, educate others, etc shape our lives..and marry each other. We do not even want to know the Truth. If you don't put God first in your LIFE then what are you doing with your LIFE??!!! Giving IT to the enemy. That is it. That simple. We need to re-educate to go and look and simply allow the truth to come into our lives. That simple, the enemy wants to make IT difficult for us. While God wanted to make it the most sinpelest tthing. But our free Will..we Just do whatever we tell ourselfs to do..what our flesh wants to do. Black men, you are Kings, and you Will need your Queens to stand by you to succeed. What is stronger? Alone?, OR together? That is the reason God created woman to help the man with His work. We need you to stand up, and let all insecurities go, and create your healthy relationships with your children, families, etc.. make your girlfriend, your baby momma, your wife. Invite God and the Holy Spirit into your everything and your marriage Will never fail. That is His promise. Like the title of this song, I promise. Amen, Jagged Edge. In Jesus Mighty name, Amen.
well, a black woman doesn't have to marry a black man....one girl said "not every black woman is going to get a black man". Not every black woman wants one. And vice versa. That's what I've seen.
Interesting piece!!!! We do get married!!!! Don’t believe the hype!!! I’ve been married for 23 yrs to a loving/sometimes crazy as hell black man!😂but so can I be😂. That’s my man! We’ve been through a lotttt!!! This world doomed us to divorce(not sayin nothin is wrong w/divorce) a lot of times it’s the BEST solution. But in my case we made it through those very tough times together only by his grace🙏🏽we still mad in love WHAT THEY KNOW ABOUT IT!💗who said marriage ain’t for us.🙄
I dont know about yall but I want and will marry a black woman. I believe im here to do that and have children and teach them what I know about life. Yes it is 2013 but and we are in a new society but new ideas doesnt have to come at a cost of not gettting marrried, concieving or turning gay if your not born that way. I dont care how long it take imma fight the good fight and find my queen who is as such not by self appointment but by her actions and grace. This thinking isnt from any...
A black woman chooses to settle down and get married at a later age. True...but that's only when she's been ran through, have a few bastard kids with multiple men, emotionally and psychologically damaged from her past relationships and not attractive as she once was when she was over looking the "good guy". There it is!
I agree with almost everything in dis vid....but a woman said women r independent which is true but meaning dey don't need men an dats da problem men aren't wanted anymore so men we never really get married or like lately sum come out admitting there gay!!! Now dats at a all time high...so sum men are marrying eachother
Being "independent" is awesome when u alone..but when u in a relationship that shit has to die it's depending on eachother(no longer "I" it's "WE")...that pretty much kills the relationship instantly I'm with you????but I'm alone????:/ ooookkkk dat doesn't really make any sense an most men hear it like that
Also from Canada; I'm white and with the laws the way they are and the females (pick any colour) are so entitled I have ZERO interest in marriage. Mgtow is my path.
Alimony is put in place to protect the woman. So that a woman who didn't work or who didn't make much during the marriage isn't left high and dry when the marriage ends. It is sad though that a lot of people take advantage of this system, usually to hurt the man. For example my mom's ex has to pay his ex wife alimony. He makes over 80K she makes around 60K. She doesn't need alimony, but she got it, she is a common example of abusing the system.
Facepalm I'm reading the comments. Marriage was no invited by the government you guys. God made marriage. Then other pagan religions copied it way before the government.
You shouldn't generalize. Not all black women "refuse" to date interracially. I know plenty of black women who date and marry men from other cultures. Also, there are plenty of black women who get and stay married to black men, so how is it a fantasy? For the record, I have been married to a black man for 10 years now. Your statement reeks of ignorance and anger. Tsk, tsk....
