When the original Borderlands video game came out in 2009, I skipped it. I was a freshman in high school then and was saving up all my nickels for Dragon Age Origins which came out the next month. I did eventually pick it up used at GameStop and I did play through the campaign once, but it didn’t really hook me. So I want to begin this review by saying - I don’t have a great memory of the game or its story, which is feel is good because then I’m judging this film on the merits of just the film. I’m vaguely familiar with the world enough to appreciate Pandora and the atmosphere and well Claptrap is annoying as ever, but I’m able to judge the movie as a movie.
Holy crap, what a waste of time.
When I saw that this movie was getting 0%, 4%, 3% critic review on rotten tomatoes, I was excited. I was hopeful that this Eli Roth film was going to be so bad that it’s entertaining; like Madame Webb. Madame Webb is fantastic at being awful. That’s the kind of movie you put with your friends when you’re looking at something to have fun with. It’s so bad, that’s it’s fun. Borderlands the Film is not very fun. And that’s a real shame.
The film is about Cate Blanchet, Kevin Hart, Jamie Lee Curtis, and Ariana Greenblat (who you’ll recall from Ahsoka and Barbie) traversing the wasteland of Pandora in search of a long lost alien treasure vault. The premise of the film should be fun. It’s violent. It’s wacky. It’s irreverent. But oh my god the plot is paper thin.
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4 окт 2024
