Brandon's Cult Movie Reviews: TURKISH STAR WARS 

Cüneyt Arkın passed away today. Rip. He was a legendary dude in Turkey.

Rule 35: if it exists there's a Turkish Knock off of it. NO EXCEPTIONS

That training scene Is pretty much the answer to the question ''what if there was a Turkish Kamen Rider?''

10:07 The real translation is: Ali(Aytekin Akkaya): "You fought to loud. Her(the princess) husbands(the monsters) came. Murat(Cuneyt Arkin):" Good thing they did, or you would have never left her." That's what I remember.

Dude was ripping alien arms apart and bashing them in with them. He was truly channeling his inner Wookiee.

I can't stop laughing! Between the insane herky-jerky editing, puppet punching and whatthefuckery of the screwy plot and Brandon's sarcastic remarks, I'm getting a weeks worth of laugh therapy in one sitting!

"he just catches the next stock footage ship outta town" oh my god, that one had me bad! as a turk myself, i can't just have enough of these turkish knock-off reviews. good job Brandon!

Like you said, subtitles are optional, but since I watched this subbed, I can say they can really enhance the experience. Why? Because the actual plot (or at least, what this movie tries to pass as plot) is bonkers as all hell. The beginning has loads of exposition about humanity advancing to the space age and being attacked by a mysterious alien force (led by a evil wizard), but here's come the craziest part: The aliens didn't destroyed Earth yet because it is protected by a forcefield made of human brains. I'm not making this up. Also, those guys on horses that attack them at the beginning... They were supposed to be skeletons.

kudos for saying Cüneyt properly!

5:19 "The Ottoman Empire Strikes Back". LMAO

Legend says Chuck Norris got trained by Cüneyt Arkın, even the name Chuck was given by him as in Çak! in Turkish meaning to hit as an order. Plus, If you raise up your hand and say “chuck!” to a random Turk, If he/she is cool enough indeed will you give you a high five.

You know it’s just dawned on me this movie is kind of goofy

Every Child sleeps with a Chuck Norris Pyjama but Chuck Norris sleeps with a Cüneyt Arkin Pyjama.

Understanding the Turkish while he has to guess what they're saying gives me a sense of power

I'll hold out til they release the Turkish Star Wars: Special Edition.

Turkish knock offs are so fun, I found one of the giallo film ‘The Strange Vice of Mrs. Wardh’ that was utterly hilarious

Every time Brando says Turkish, I think of the classic flick "SNATCH!" "I'm sweet enough Turkish....."

Never. And I mean never, challenge a Turkish movie to get weirder.

If Cuneyt Arkin was in the next Fast & Furious movie, Vin Diesel would be perfectly okay with getting his ass kicked on screen.

7:22 ah, can't believe so much time already passed... Love this series.

I'll give this movie credit where it's due, the fights scenes are decently choreographed.

You encapsulated this movie the best way possible.

The part with the wolf is from a movie called the magic sowrd.

I recently just bought this movie on Ebay, totally worth it. I was laughing the entire time. My version also came with subtitles, which only added to the hilarity.

Your subtitles make this look like an Abridged version of Turkish Star Wars!

I surprised he hasn't done this Turkish knock off but the timing is very serendipitous.

You are officially my favorite RU-vid movie reviewer!

If anyone is wondering, the Wolfman thing in the tomb was stock footage from the MST3K/Rifftrax feature "The Magic Sword."

Loving these Turkish movies content as a Turkish person. Here are some fun facts from a fellow Cüneyt Arkın fan(may he rest in peace) Originaly the movie was going to be more than 2 hours. They had to cut. So the story goes they had a great set, some props and even 2 spaceships, back in the day it was gonna be a very expensive movie. But due to heavy storm almost all the props and spaceships and set were destroyed. There was this old interview in which Cüneyt told; "In the night we were sewing the fluffy monster constumes and at day we were ripping them apart" Because of the heavy budget limitations due to losing everything on set, they had to " improvise" a lot of things including ripping off scenes from other movies. Great job on video, I may even suggest some Cüneyt Arkın hidden gems at some point.

For some reason, Arkin's character in this really reminds me of Segata Sanshiro.

YES! I've been looking forward to this!

The production value is amazing! Oh, not your video, I mean Turkish Star Wars.

by far one of your best, well done!

I especially love how they were able to get John Williams to do the music for this movie. Sounds JUST like Indiana Jones... wait

12:20 Oh God! Telephone cords! His only weakness!

How about Japanese Spiderman and or Wizards from 1977.

11:01 Nobody suspects the Spanish Inquisition!

"How much copyright infringement do you want to commit?" "Yes!"

Well that looked awful, but the climax where he punched everyone in halve and they did cut edits every second did look strangely awesome.

The copy I watched only had Spanish subtitles, so I had to try to decipher what in the world was going on on screen while actively translating.

Your reviews are a Turkish delight.

7:07 reminds me of Samurai Jack Season 2 Episode 1 when he learned to fly/Jump High!

RIP Cuneyt Arkin.

Actually, Legend of Dinosaurs music fits pretty good with that training montage...

Brandon you are the best at making even the most ridiculous movies relentlessly entertaining . Your wit is rapier sharp, your observations are trek nitpick worthy. Much admiration celluloid brother!

12:00 Oh my god, that monster's from Bert I. Gordon's "The Magic Sword." What a random choice!

Legend of Dinosaurs and Monster Birds theme is the new Guile theme

To be fair, a Turkish Dark Universe couldn't be any more disastrous than Universal's attempts.

Today actor Cüneyt Arkın passed away. R.I.P. the man who saved the world.

One of your best Brandon!

I recognize those ruins when they crash as Derinkuyu (Massive Underground City that probably housed like 20,000 people).

Again, the music from Legend of the Dinosaurs is fucking amazing, and every time I play it at the bar people ask what the song is called. And I'm always like "Well, it's called 'Track 14 and...'." And it's got to the point that regulars sing along to that "Pshshshshshshsh" sound that's just...Part of the music? And it's amazing and thank you so much for what you do

You are my Hero, BEST-BIRTHDAY-PRESENT-EVER

I got a star wars merch ad for this vid, heh

Next, Turkish Star Wars Holiday Special.

The final battle sequence of this movie is so fucking insane and it’s feels like I’m in a acid trip.

*¡enjoyed at 11:07 pm Pacific Standard Time on Friday, 9 December 2022!*

Marvel should make a comic out of this.

keep up the good work brandon.

They even ripped off The Magic Sword. I mean nothing was safe....

9:43 Ha! Once again you've been disarmed!

All I could think of when I was looking at the red gold mask guy was Queen Amidala. How much did George Lucas knock off from the knock offs of his work?

Music hits different each time

Still better than Brazilian Star Wars :P

Where the heck do you find these movies? lol

This is just truly great!

If you're ever looking for FRESH bad superhero movies, Russia's massive misfire "Guardians" just hit US DVD/BD. It looks and sounds beautiful, but it's terribly written and literally everything about it is swiped from US movies or comics.

You know what would make the movie better? GREEN SLIIIIIIIIIIIIME!!!!!!!!

Brandon, You the Man!

My wife is from Turkey. I get her to translate the dialogue, it is rubbish "You should like good wine and your good looks will get you into trouble" She said she used to take the Mickey out of films like this when she was growing up. Arkin was a big star in Turkey, partly because he had blue eyes which, although not unheard of, are unusual there.

Wait the movie got a sequel!? (Looks it up) Dear god.... It's called TURKS IN SPACE! And it was made in 2006? I don't even know what is real anymore.

15:02 Well, never would’ve expected a YTP reference in one of these vids, but it certainly is welcome!

uh...Why did the title card made me think of a Fighting Game?

I laughed at the title card cause brandon is cross eyed with a stupid expression BTW this channel deserves more subs

Dammit, B, you just spoiled that effect for me. XD (15:52)

Hello Turkish Ground Zero!!

Is there any prequel of this one? I need to watch of this kind of ridiculous mockbuster.

Great video ! :)

12:00 That's the ogre from "The Magic Sword!"

Well you can't get in trouble for a text crawl, as Flash Gordon did it before Star Wars in the old black and white cinema series. So the only issue is the music and someone must have done a generic Star Wars alike music to get around it. We demand our text crawls.

"The Rhamphorynchus Boogey" fits with everything.

At 12 minutes in, that's the ogre from The Magic Sword!

Got the theme on my play list 🎵🎶

Brandon, you are great! :)

Classic - great review!

RIP Cunyet Arkin.

Turkish Star Trek was part of #TuristÖmer parody series. A "tourist" visiting established series & settings is no "knock-off".

This was definitely more enjoyable than the movie itself. I should have watched this first. Did you catch all the sound effects from the Flash Gordon movie? I will have to check out your reviews on the other Turkish rip offs. This was well prepared and well done.

I'm surprised that there isn't a Turkish Fist of The North Star

1:52 that pilot is the same actor who played Captain America in Turkish Spiderman.

Great review of my favourite wtf movie of all time!

One of the funniest yet!

Here is a fun fact. See this was inspired by Star Wars but the reason for stock footage was because that right before filming commenced the actual full sized ship sets were destroyed in a storm and they didn’t have enough money to rebuild them.

ROFL was laughing 5 minutes with the "i finished already" line.

Since this video came out five years ago, was the dvd ever released?

15:53 you had me going for a bit but spoiling the movie magic like that is why you'll never make it big. It's like a mall Santa saying he's not really Santa when he looks just like him.

Damn it. The monster at 12:00 is from The Magic Sword (1962). I know cause i saw it on MST3K.. And they said "Teddy Ruxpin, NO!!!!!" Damn you Turkish Star Wars.

An even weirder stinger would've been the little boy doing kung fu punches; "Ya, ya, ya, ya..."

I didn't pay very close attention when I watched it but I thought it was hilarious that the movie stopped to talk about Islam. We need more Islam in Star Wars

12:24 Nah, he's just being turned into Turkish Winter Soldier. 14:16 So now we know the origin story of Turkish Ferrus Mannus (WH40k). Anyway, nice to finally see this infamous stinker in all it's glory, great review as always!