Can You Get Your Ex Back By Being Friends With Them?

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Clay Andrews answers "Can You Get Your Ex Back By Being Friends With Them?" with a YES! but probably not in the way that you think.
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You’re probably here because you have broken up with your ex but they still want to be friends with you and you, with them. Though you say you are okay with it, you are a bit worried about the friend zone.
Friendzone is when a special someone have decided to just stay friends with you and have nothing more than that.
Maybe your ex has even said something like, "Hey, I just see you as a friend," or, "We should just be friends," or, "I lost all attraction for you," or, "I love you, but I'm not in love with you," that make you start worrying if you still have a chance.
You don't need to be worried about the friend zone with your ex, assuming you were in an actual relationship with them because staying friends can help you strengthen the emotional connection between the two of you. Still vague? Watch the video to understand it better with Clay Andrews!
**** IMPORTANT ****
This is an internet video, and it should be obvious, but this video and other videos on this channel should not be taken as a substitute for the evaluation of a psychologist, therapist, counselor, etc. This video and other videos on this channel are intended for informational uses only, and only reflect the personal opinions of the creator. The creator of this video is not responsible for your actions or choices or the consequences of your actions or choices.

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3 ноя 2020

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Комментарии : 166

@frankl7370 2 года назад

Everyone who doubts you can get back with an ex by being friends first are also the people who are afraid when their gf/bf has a friendship with their exes. Funny that. Just have the intent to be their friend and love them as a human being; try to be a better you and if the love is still there/real then the rest will take care of itself.

@KarelChytilArt 2 года назад

You are right

@saraholland8743 2 года назад

Funny that. Truth.

@karmaisreal9094 Год назад

How is that working out

@frankl7370 Год назад

@@karmaisreal9094 update: in the end, she did not reply to any of my emails or the Xmas card/present I sent her. We didn’t become friends as we’ve said we would because deep down we both know we cared, deeply, for each other but are just not compatible. I then went on numerous dates in the past 11 months, but did not take the time to heal/reflect and failed with new people. You have to let go, completely, before you can start again. This is the absolute truth. Two weeks ago I met someone at a networking event for work, and I am sober, but excited to see where things could go with this new lady. The truth is, there is absolutely more than one person out there for us. But when someone leaves us; we fool ourselves into believing that was our last chance at love or that we’re unworthy. It really isn’t true at all, it’s our head/ego playing tricks on us. Admittedly, it has been a somewhat long/difficult period for me, but the time alone allowed me to get to know me, which is priceless. I wish her happiness and peace, but more importantly I wish myself said things. You know you’re over someone when you start to care more about yourself…

@teezo2917 4 месяца назад

@@frankl7370thanks for the honesty

@brucehutchings Год назад

Dear Clay, I had this exact conversation yesterday with my former partner. We got from a HARD NO, DOOR IS CLOSED to an agreement of "now by Now" take each interaction at a time. Thank you.

@rideoutlondon Год назад

It was working with my ex but then I got emotional with her and missed her so much I broke down. Have to go back to square one now. We spent a weekend together and slept in the same bed and it all got a bit overwhelming.

@HistoryDave1 Год назад

Just had my first "friend" conversation with my ex. Thanks for the great content, Clay!

@jasonarokiaraj9817 3 года назад

It’s best to just be friends right now, rather than going out as a couple, especially if it means going out on group dates because you don’t want to know who you’re interested in right now. It would rush the process and make him or her less interested.

@davidbailey1718 3 года назад

I love this video. It's my life right now. My wife and I are separated after some serious emotional trauma. Yet, we stay in contact daily, and even hang out couple times a week.

@gheist8790 Год назад

did it work out in the end?

@Anita-qw5zs 9 месяцев назад

How’s everything been?

@teezo2917 4 месяца назад

How’d it go?

@MyDarlingRocsi 2 года назад

Thanks, Clay! Dropping pearls of wisdom, as per usual… ✌🏾

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

Much appreciated. ;-)

@jonathanlaurince8085 2 года назад

Man you are changing the game big time and in a positive way. Thank you

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

Thank you so much for the positive feedback. We truly appreciate that. :-)

@BrandonHirsch 3 года назад

This is what I am currently doing with my ex girlfriend, and it really is working out quite well! :)

@utatheodore6552 3 года назад

+ 2 3 4 7 0 3 4 2 1 8 8 9 3

@mchaver1000 2 года назад

Update?

@limitlessqueen 2 года назад

Lucky you. I wish my ex would put his walla down and open up to me again and give me a second chance 😢

@adgal4830 2 года назад

@Koriander Yander ++

@Seabass-tc4hd 2 года назад

@@mchaver1000 he’s in the friend zone

@mallorys6815 3 года назад

My ex said he wanted to be friends but isn't ready to hang out with me as a friend. We still talk everyday though. It's just hard because he won't express what his concerns are.

@sureyyafeyaz5259 Год назад

This is what I'm fucking going through like l need some help

@maggiemerlini 2 года назад

I actually think my ex is trying to do this as well. He asked me to be friends, and when I asked him if he’d ever consider a relationship in the future, he said “if it’s meant to be, it’ll happen.” I think he, as well, is trying to regain communication, trust, etc in friendship, to then retry a relationship if things go well. He apologised to me for “hurting me and fucking up,” and when I said “communication is key,” after we broke up, told me he “wished he realised that sooner,” and he “wished he listed to me.”

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

It sounds like you both are having good conversations. I agree that friendship is the label that some would consider to rebuild good conversations and connection. Let things grow organically.

@maggiemerlini 2 года назад

@@ClayAndrews Yess! Thank you. I had talked to him yesterday, and again he was saying stuff like “I do just think of you as a friend, but if we’re meant to be, it’ll happen.” He DID say it wasn’t because he’s specifically trying to work on stuff, but because he doesn’t want me out of his life. I’m now not focusing on “what can I do to get him back,” I’m focusing on “what can I do to better myself?” In our friendship it’s not going to be trying to better stuff to get back together with him, it’s going to be to organically and VERY VERY SLOWLY better our connection, communication, and trust. I know I cannot rush this. If, through that, we regain feelings for each other, great. He and I first started dating when neither of us were expecting it or looking for anything, so I feel it should be the same way now. We’re taking a few weeks away from each other, since he and I both agreed to that. I know if we become friends right now, I’m going to act off of wanting him back, and not act off of what’s right and organic. Do you have any other tips for me?

@josiaholaniyi1395 2 года назад

Contact him for all kind of problems including saving your marriage or relationship from divorce,...

@pratikshapandey4973 2 года назад

@MaggieMerlini hey how was your friendship going or you guys are being together?

@maggiemerlini 2 года назад

@@pratikshapandey4973 so he and i are actually best friends right now! i just got cheated on by someone and am single, but hes been in a relationship for 2 months. i still have some feelings for him, idk if he has any for me, but either way, he and i are a big part of each other’s lives still and im very happy about that :)

@mansondevil33 2 года назад

This is 100% true. I'm in the process of getting back together. Things were going great, then all of the sudden she went cold on me. I naturally started getting frustrated at this and began trying to force a relationship with her, trying to convince her and persuade to go on dates and spend time together. Didn't work. Out of frustration I gave up, told her let's just be friends right now and BOOM! She starts texting me everyday, initiating conversation and even started suggesting dates. It was a mindfuck for sure, but without that pressure to commit, I think she finally felt comfortable again in trying to form a relationship together.

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

Thanks for sharing and we truly appreciate that.

@silverdog07nf 2 года назад

Can you give an update?

@basherbellamy922 2 года назад

So will friends be the move I just got back in contact with my ex had a few positive interactions with them and made they laugh prior to this I was blocked and she went cold saying she feels nothing and has nothing and I should give me feeling to someone else but she’s not like that now.. I wonder if I say o want to be friends woth that place me in a label then she will start dating people and bring it up to me

@mansondevil33 2 года назад

@@basherbellamy922 Yeah, remove the pressure from the situation by saying you just want to be friends, but still keep in consistent contact with her. Don't worry, if she's still talking with you and she's going through these hot and cold phases, that means there is still that bond between the two of you and she still loves you. She's just conflicted because she loves you but was unhappy in the relationship, and she went cold because she thinks if she just lies to herself and you about how she feels about you, that the pain from the breakup will go away faster. Unfortunately, it doesn't work that way and love can't always just be switched off, even if you want to move on. So my advice is to work on yourself, work on things that contributed to the end of the relationship and keep showing up as the improved version of yourself until she can't deny it anymore, all the while still nourishing the bond between you too. If that doesn't work and she doesn't acknowledge the changes you've made, move on and go no contact and start a new chapter. She might come around, she might not, and you might find someone even better. Stay optimistic that things will work out, as long as you keep doing the right things.

@Gbb93 9 месяцев назад

Depends on why you broke up. If there was a lack of intimacy and companionship love, then maybe the friendship is exactly what you need to spark her interest again. But don’t hesitate to create sexual tension and flirt with her. I’ve yet to meet someone that didn’t like when they’re ex flirted if they were still attracted to them.

@harleyquinnn9228 Год назад

Hope you’ll come back, Mi Amor❤️

@ashleyj2410 Год назад

I was just in this situation. He brought up the idea of being friends after I broke up with him and I agreed because I’m a mature adult who has control over my feelings. He basically wanted to take time to “grow”. Since we weren’t dating anymore and we were strictly friends, I decided to see what else was out there. I went out on a date with a new guy and posted it on my Snapchat….my ex went crazy. He texted me these long paragraphs talking about how I’m a whore and how he was already seeing someone else anyway. So childish…I blocked my ex on everything and moved on with my life.

@surfkat59 10 месяцев назад

He blew it with you by acting out like that. What an idiot.

@regenerativebeing1860 2 года назад

Thank you so much.

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

You're welcome!

@surfkat59 10 месяцев назад

Bam! This is exactly what my ex and I have been doing since our breakup 3 months ago. It went from outright anger on her part just to see me, to me house sitting for 4 days a month after, to having dinners, to more recently staying overnight in the other bedroom after her recent surgery into spending the next day running errands together. I have obliged her by taking care of her yard work and having good intellectual conversations with her while watching TV. It's doable. A slow but steady process without pressuring her or triggering her to revert and give her the reason as to why she broke things off after 12 years together in the first place. I am patient and fully know if I am being used. I aint no dummy. She told me that she needs time to sort things out, especially after her recent masectomy. THAT right there is a big one emotionally. So, I just have to be supportive and patient. Time will tell. Good advice regarding the video!❤

@Gbb93 9 месяцев назад

I’m betting you’re going to stay in that friend zone. She gets all the benefits of a loving boyfriend without the responsibility of being a loving girlfriend. Ain’t gonna work for you and you’re lying to yourself bud. Be honest, you just enjoy the time with her and don’t have any boundaries with her. I could be wrong and hope it works for you but if she was the one to suggest the friendship, she will get to have her cake and eat it too.

@surfkat59 9 месяцев назад

@gabrielbacklund9581 The friendship suggestion was mutual, bud. The door swung both ways. We been married for 12 years. You don't understand the dynamic of our relationship in the first place. We are only separated for the time being. She merely needs space and time to recover.

@lordrigormortis 6 месяцев назад

Update?, i'm in something similiar like yours, she broke up with me but will reconsider getting back together once i show her i fixed my issues/behavior.

@monica4141 3 года назад

Very interesting! Thank you for this insight

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Glad you enjoyed it!

@mchaver1000 2 года назад

Can you make another in-depth video on how to ask her out without her thinking it’s to get her back. And kinds of texts you can send and how long you should wait between “dates” would really appreciate it :)

@MrTheJiugo 2 года назад

Great idea

@jellegiesen4889 2 года назад

Same applies when she's in a rebound ? She still wants to meet. We gonna do a group sport sunday for fun. With her mom and little sister. Her mom invited me

@edwardmiller5237 3 года назад

Unless you were friends initially never agree to be friends!

@cynthiab8377 3 года назад

Will this friends first approach works if he already has a tinder profile? Broke up 4 months ago, spend first 2 months of post break up trying to talk, apologize, plead to patch things up to a point that he asked to be left alone, and I respected that. Went into 20 days NC. Broke NC when I needed his help and then we started texting a bit (he only replies when I initiate) and spoke a few times over the phone. He called me once, we spoke for an hour but nothing about getting back. Just surface hobby topic. I shared a bit of my emotions & areas that I’ve improved. He asked what I want. I told him I wanted us to be on good terms, connect like before and see how things go. He was silent at first and said he doesn’t know. I asked him out for coffee he said he’s busy. Later he called me up. I thought there’s a positive sign as before the NC he ignored my texts and calls. However I maybe a bit too comfortable and slide into the old pattern of communicating with him everything and called him every other night to talk. He still responded when I addressed him in our pet nick name. He suddenly turns cold again, I thought maybe it’s the overwhelming texts so I send a text and addressed him as “mate” . He didn’t reply. Later the same night I called him and asked him why his sudden behavior change. He told me friends won’t call him every day. I’m not sure if he wanted to be friends or was annoyed that I addressed him as “mate” in recent text when he turned a bit cold. What should I do now?

@suzieboo4762 3 года назад

We were friends for a long time before the relationship. We were together for almost a year and a half and now we’ve been broken up for two months. I miss my best friend. He is uncomfortable to even be around me. Help!! I still love this man!

@Ghettochild.2600 4 месяца назад

I needed this video. So helpful. After 6 years my partner moved away to "work on themselves" and be closer to family. DA with not very good communication. Relationship was great, sex was great. Spent Valentine's day together and had tons of passion and physical intamacy. But when I left from visiting she broke it off and I find myself in the friend zone. Her saying that she can't give 100% to a relationship and doesn't wan't one right now to work on her issues. I'm more secure, but been struggling to go no contact or stay friends. I'd like to get back together of course, but this video helped take some stress away and give clarity to staying friends that it can work out.

@williamdolan7189 Год назад

After months of me trying to get my ex back and repair the relationship I finally decided to tell her let’s just be friends now we actually spend time together once a week! It’s difficult at times because i sometimes want romantic connection

@nainanain8816 2 года назад

my ex broke up with me because i cheated on him . Right after i realised that i can't live without him and i really do love him . i apologies him . He gave me 2nd chance and i tried my best to maintain a healthy relationship with him during this period. He was also happy with me and he really loves me alot but after 11 months he broke up with me saying that he can't forget the past that i've cheated on him.. It's been 1 month now i've been crying and begging him and atlast he agreed to be JUST FRIENDS so that i can move on without missing him. But i really want him back not as a friend only. what should i do now 🥺

@nightmaregash 3 года назад

my ex broke with me up on February 12th, 2021 I did not speak to her or called her until mid March but that was one or three times but I’m April we became really good friends and hangout every day now June we still talk every day depending if she isn’t busy. I have been struggling with others telling me To not talk to her and it confuses me what to do.

@Sgt.FreeZ_8787 2 года назад

Just stay sting and keep with your own morals be yourself and make decisions for yourself don’t worry what others think

@peachblossom.phlox3403 3 года назад

My ex asked to be friends when he broke up with me because I do still love and care for him and we also work closely together so I can't deny being friends anyways. It's been 5 months and he just treats me like a coworker and shows no signs of missing me and we were together for three years 😞

@marceliarias4538 3 года назад

I’m going through the same thing. 🥺

@abiyuvan9261 3 года назад

Me too

@mercwiffamouff7301 3 года назад

I'm friends with my ex now. We were more talking better and stuff before i had an accident. I got really needy and stuff from brain trauma and started trying to get her back hard even though before that we were being friends and it was good. After i healed from my trauma. i apologized a few times during my recovery 3 weeks. she said she still loved me right before the accident. Then after my trauma she said no she didn't love me anymore. I felt like she was lying. I saw her on Halloween. She and her daughter pushed me around in my wheelchair (temporary, i can walk just not long distance) and i asked her again and she said she did still love me. But wants to not date anyone which she said from the start, about two months ago. I love her and her daughter more than anyone ive ever been with by far. And our break up wasn't even bad and on lack of communication. She thought i didn't care anymore and i told her like how much i actually did and she felt horrible. And then it was like "i fucked up and i hurt you and i don't want to look like an idiot cuz i made this decision and i don't want to hurt your again and I'm not fit to be in a relationship" she is so good and so nice. She has trauma mentally from her ex. He abused her bad. Im trying really hard to just be there and she's being friendly still but she seems more. Reserved than she was before my accident... Im really scared

@sarahbill3085 3 года назад

I can help you out but do you really need her back??

@mercwiffamouff7301 3 года назад

@@sarahbill3085 her and her daughter are more important than anything

@danielejuskaite7556 Год назад

Can someone help me? My ex broke up with me, because his feelings for his ex crush came back. He was obsessed with that girl for 6 years and only forgot her when he fell in love with me. We were together for 10 months and our relationship was perfect. We were both happy and planned a future together. But his feelings for that girl came back, so he broke up with me. That girl does'nt have feelings for him. We stayed friends with my ex and spend a lot of time together. How can I get him back when he loves another girl???

@stilianosgabriel 2 года назад

So I started texting my ex after some time of no contact she seemed very cold at first, but after I sent her a happy birthday she responded without being cold to me which I was afraid she will do. And she even responds to me with asking me back how am I doing and such. I thing it is going pretty well bad emotions have started disappearing but I am still a bit doubting because she would never text me first. It happened that every time I break the conversation because I kinda feel like she isn't really trying to have a conversation but maybe its just me. That's how she always was she prefers a face to face conversation rather than texting but unfortunately I can't meet with her yet since I am out of the country for the mean time but I would definitely keep some connection with her and when I would be back I would try to take her for a coffee I think that's when it would also show if we have a chance again.

@helenrowley3979 4 месяца назад

What should you respond if they say they want to be friends but also they say that they dont want to date anyone else and hate the thought of you dating someone else?

@Jo-gf6ii 2 года назад

This might sound like a silly question, but how do you know if you’ve built the emotional connection? My ex and I are friends, sometimes with benefits, although I don’t think this is where he wants to be. I think he’s only “playing sometimes boyfriend” because he thinks I can’t do friendship (and he’s right, I still love him deeply and struggle not being in a relationship with him) but he does want me in his life, by his own pleading and admission. He’s a single father who got custody of his children only a couple of years ago. We were already living together but he had to move out when he got custody due to various circumstances. We’d planned on moving back in together and blending our two sets of teenage daughters but it never eventuated. He now feels that during the 2 years we had been trying to blend, he was under too much pressure trying to split his time between his children, and me. The two sets of children are all teenage girls, so not as easy a task to blend as if they were under 10 years old. Anyway, I don’t know how to recognise whether to apply the pressure and do the “dating other people” spiel, or whether to reduce the pressure and just be friends without the intimate connection we have at the moment as I don’t feel it’s actually mutual. I’m not sure how to recognise whether the connection is high enough, or if it even exists. He calls me a couple of times a week and we see each other at least once. He kisses and hugs me hello and goodbye, and will reach out to hold my hand at the movies or cuddle up to me on the couch at home, but he seems to be actively avoiding anything sexual unless (I think) he feels he has to. I’ve also just purchased your RR course.

@noahdavis8559 10 месяцев назад

I dont want an alterior motive, I genuinely judt want to spend time with this person that I i love. But i really truly do love them. I can't make someone feel a certain way, and I don't want to. How can I shake how I want them to feel?

@ousmanjobe6587 3 года назад

She breakups with me after 3 years of a relationship, This is exactly my situation, she was totally in love with me, but I was not focusing on her that much, so I went on a holiday she started dating someone else and doesn't want to do anything with me, sometimes she picked up my calls, but sometimes not, she's nice to me but doesn't wanna come back, and she's hidden her new relationship, and when I started to see something is going on, I was so needy and begging, and I think that makes my situation worse, what do you think about my situation?

@voltric2938 2 года назад

Move on bro it would be different of she didn’t date anyone but she gonna lose respect for you and probably has so don’t lose any of your dignity and just leave

@SwissFlightInsight Год назад

Hi, got a six month relationship which ended two weeks ago. She was separated after 17 y relationships which ended 1 y ago. She told me she doesn’t feel I am the right men for her, she likes me and she tell me that thinks about me. She would love to keep in touch and remain friends when I will be ready, I have two kids from another relationship which she loves and also my two boys lover her a lot and would like to continue do activities all together. Now I started a periodo of no contact which I will try to keep for a month then I will like to meet her to define some boundaries of this friendship and start spend time with her to have our new space. Do you think I am doing right ? I don’t have much expectations but maybe with time and rising the emotions we will find our way.

@Jaksi-a 3 года назад

In january my partner through 10 years left me for another guy she's known for a while and started seeing in December. It ruined me mentally, what we had was my life. I moved out in February and in march I found a new girlfriend. I recently left her after 7 months as I realised I'm not emotionally ready to bond with someone new and that she must have unintentionally been a way for me to escape my loss, frustration and pain. Its sad because she was only kind to me and really wanted it to go places as did I. I've met with my "big" x once, we talked for 3 hours. She's still with the other guy. She wants me in her and her familys' life as she she's us as best friends and her family being my family, which they had become. I'm not sure what to do with that. I'm trying to chance and clean up my past and figure myself out. Will having her in my life make any sence? I'm unsure if it will be too difficult for me...

@sarahbill3085 3 года назад

Do you really need her back??

@Jmitez 3 года назад

I think you can be friends after she breaks up with you... but only if you take it for what it is! If she’s using you for validation and emotional support, then USE HER for validation and an ego boost! Every time she reaches out, make it a sign that she can’t stop thinking about you, BUT DONT FALL FOR HER AGAIN!!!! In the meantime, go date and have fun with other women who have more interest in you. Never expect anything from the women who friendzoned you!!

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

There are two phases that you need to understand about being friends. #1. You can't be friends with your Ex --- when you haven't fully healed from the breakup because if you do not do active no contact and continue to reach out to your ex as a friend, you wouldn't be able to help for you to have an ulterior motive in getting your Ex back. Your Ex will notice this and might eventually go to reactance because your ex will see that you are still not over them. When you have done ANC and have regained emotional balance: #2. Being friends (AT THIS STAGE) with your Ex will help because it will help you to reach out with your Ex and be able to show your Ex how much you have changed.

@Silver-Lining1111 3 года назад

It doesn’t work if she or he is in a new relationship and want to be friends or reaching out to you. You have to be 100% over her/him, even than the memories will follow everytime.

@20ILLUSIONIST08 2 года назад

My ex is my friend and i asked him out he thought about it but said no cause he said i dont wanna try again so friendzoned me but were closer again and he said to a friend that he thinks if we broke up again we wouldnt be friends, advise pls

@katarina9168 3 года назад

What if we calls each other friends but doesn’t text as often as friends do? Like he starts a conversation every few days and he was a dumper that came back to me on 23rd day of no contact I was doing Can i be back with him or he really just wants friendship? Update: he now isn’t answering for 2 weeks Tho we were long distance and corona ruined us

@dreamboyspeakstv7317 3 года назад

Same here

@lisat5666 3 года назад

Same here covid ruined us...hes seeing someone in his city

@rumaakthar4494 8 месяцев назад

That will only work if his still single but if his dating his attention be on her not on me

@twinklestar2490 Год назад

Can i ask u something...its been 2 yrs since we broke up back then he asked me to wait as he needed some space .....now when i gave him space he is saying that he has moved on ...he said that same line 6 times that "its been a long since our breakup so i have moved on nd u should also move on we r done we dont have a future together" and even though i waited for 2 yrs long now he said he dont have feelings for me nd just wants to be frnds .he casually texted with me 2 days and he reminds me of the good tym we had but when i asked him abt wht are his feelings now.. suddenly then he said all these that he has moved on......i want him badly plz can u tell me what to do , exactly wht the situation is?

@ash-fr3eg 2 года назад

So we all searched this up 💀✋

@olivercross2766 Год назад

Do i have to use no contact right after the breakup?

@juliemiles9848 3 года назад

My ex said he was ok with being friends and seeing other people. But what happens if I told my ex that I’m not ready to be friends at the moment? It’s been 3 days since I last said that. Initially, I wasn’t ok with it because I think I needed some time to think. But now I think I just don’t want to lose him as a person in my life. And would be willing to meet him half way. Would love your input.

@dwightschrute8141 2 года назад

Update?

@archonofvoid 3 года назад

Why would this be better than no contact tho?

@PabloSanchez-il8pw 2 года назад

I got in an accident and I'm in a wheelchair now, what do you suggest

@oOLinxyOo 2 года назад

The girl I was dating for 3 months ended things between us few weeks ago, and told me that she still wants to get to know me and did say that she finds me attractive, but doesn’t want to lead me on and she also mentioned that she doesn’t see a future with me! I been doing the no contact rule it’s been 16 days now, but don’t know how to go about this whole thing! I wonder if things can still work out if she doesn’t see a future with me?

@reyez11 2 года назад

Any update my dude

@oOLinxyOo 2 года назад

@@reyez11 I haven’t tried to get back with her, but sometimes we keep in touch!

@user-jp8tp1vx8m 9 месяцев назад

Update please?

@lordrigormortis 6 месяцев назад

Update? have you tried getting back with her?

@janemarlborough8038 2 года назад

I'm friends with my ex

@deborahstefani8415 Год назад

Is this working when she has new relationship?? But i need her back

@AngelicaBruckner 3 года назад

Should you try being friends after no contact? How long should you wait before trying a friendship?

@frankl7370 2 года назад

Mine had a hard time leaving; we loved each other deeply but didn’t have the tools to not argue all the time. She asked me for 3 months apart to process. I am given her that. When I come back as her friend I will love her as a friend and wonderful human being she is. I will let go in the meantime. If it’s meant to be then a friend label will not change anything. Long answer short 3 months for the both of you to heal and move forward

@dwightschrute8141 2 года назад

Update?

@dwightschrute8141 2 года назад

@@frankl7370 update?

@adammendelski787 3 года назад

What if the two of you broke up over 14 months ago and she has been in a happy new relationship for over 10 months? Is she still attracted to me? We haven't seen each other for a year, we haven't chatted for over a month when things went pear shaped and she blocked be on one of the social platforms. I doubt she's still attracted.

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Hi Adam, when it comes to the question of attraction, the only person who can tell what they truly feel may be your ex. There are different ways to gauge their emotions and first, it's through communicating with them. In that way, you can gauge where they are at emotionally.

@adammendelski787 3 года назад

@@ClayAndrews but we're not communicating anymore.

@MsJbhater123 3 года назад

how do you build an emotional connection with your ex if he says he wants to be friends, but still needs space and time to not see me in a romantic way? what should i do?

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

First, you have to understand what emotional connection is. What do you expect and understanding when you say "emotional connection"?

@nutmag 3 года назад

@@ClayAndrews i think she meant building emotional bond but the ex wants to stay as friends.

@dwightschrute8141 2 года назад

Update?

@dr986 3 года назад

My ex messages everyday but there is another woman he’s chasing, we’re “friends” he’s come out for a walk with me but he’s full of them going on holiday etc, I’m stuck between not wanting to let him go and feeling like that the right thing to do even though I love him, obviously I’d love to get back together and have fixed what was wrong with how I interacted with him, if I take a break from being friends will that push him further away or won’t it matter?

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Hi DR, There are two phases that you need to understand about being friends. #1. You can't be friends with your Ex --- when you haven't fully healed from the breakup because if you do not do active no contact and continue to reach out to your ex as a friend, you wouldn't be able to help for you to have an ulterior motive in getting your Ex back. Your Ex will notice this and might eventually go to reactance because your ex will see that you are still not over him. When you have done ANC and have regained emotional balance: #2. Being friends (AT THIS STAGE) with your Ex will help because it will help you to reach out with your Ex and be able to show your Ex how much you have changed.

@dr986 3 года назад

@@ClayAndrews thank you 🙏

@Angelina-gz9wr 3 года назад

So what’s happened since? 😰 my Ex talks with me everyday during his work, after work, on his way to the gym.. he is still keeping contact w me. Doesn’t seem upset to have me around him.. he just won’t have intimacy with me 😓😪he is slowly slowly starting to open up to me. He’s told me a girl tried to talk to him in his ji-jitsu class but he’s not comfortable and he’s embarrassed to talk to her. I said Do you happen to kind of like her? And he said “No! I dont like anybody right now.” But now he’s picking up even more classes of ji-jitsu. Before he was going only 3 days a week and now he’s going 6 days a week. 3 during morning hours at 6am before work and then evening classes. He said it was because his schedule changed for him to go in at 8am instead of 7am...... he sounds legit but he could be lying but i can’t tell. He definitely doesn’t want me to contact anyone in his class because he thinks I will and embarrass him.. “hi. Don’t date this guy. He’s my ex and a total douche.. etc etc.” but I told him I would never.... being his friend, I feel like he’s so dumb that he’s gonna eventually just tell me his “business” 🤷🏻‍♀️🤦🏻‍♀️ then I’ll know the REAL reason why he broke up with me 🤦🏻‍♀️

@FOSELONE 3 года назад

Wonder if I just goofed. My ex & I broke up in November & didn’t speak again until February. We then spoke for the next five weeks as friends. Communication was frequent but then some days not at all. I wanted to try the connection focused approach but I ended up asking her if she was being with somebody else & she replied with, that’s irrelevant. I told her that if she was I could not be in the picture. She stated that was going to suck cause she liked bs’ing with me & reaching out. Well today is 4 days of no communication & it does suck. 😐

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

It sounds like you are going through a positive pull back.

@limitlessqueen 2 года назад

Ex and I live together but are friends. We have cuddled a little bit and made each other laugh. We just broke up not even a month ago. Why would he want to cuddle with me when we're only friends right now?

@gabrielyeamans7289 2 года назад

My ex girl did the same to me two days ago, invited me in to just cuddle nothing else. Frustrating

@emanuelrodriguez10 Год назад

UPDATE!im going through the same thing

@Frankybroadcast 2 года назад

Why the hell would you want to?

@elanaloveyogaconsciouslivi1995 2 года назад

What I'm confused about with this video though is WHEN it becomes ok to be friends with an ex? It's been about a month since he broke up with me and he's been trying to check in a couple of times and catch up since then, even tried to see me at some point but it didn't work out. I have been friendly with him but remained somewhat distant, but he wants to talk on the phone again just to catch up, and I haven't really done a proper "No contact" period because of all of this... so now I'm thinking maybe it's time to be clear with him and tell him that I need space so I can begin to move on... but now I'm conflicted after watching this video, maybe I should keep engaging him the way I have been when he reaches out?

@Statickzombie1996 2 года назад

I think the first thing that you need to figure out is if you still want to keep him in your life. Relationship ended once but doesn't mean it's over forever, only if you trully wish to move on I'm at a point with my ex where we agreed on a potential future friendship but that she needed time in order to not mix feelings up. If you were in a relationship before you had some sort of connection, do you want to keep that connection as friends and support eachoder through life or do you feel it's better for you to cut that connection and move on

@eli22nov69 2 года назад

It's like you believe in god or not? Don't decide based on what people or ur society says.

@josevelez7539 3 года назад

Why would you want to be friends with your ex when you broke up? Her motive is to use you for validation, not be friends and hopefully get back together... The best thing is to no try to be friends and move on to the next candidate! If things were so great you two would still be together and be friends and lovers!

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Hi Jose, you might want to check this video regarding that particular topic >> ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-9gtlcXjRc1c.html

@MVPlayer123 3 года назад

She told me she wants to be friends but she flirts with me as well as tease me like couples do so i am confused.

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

Just be sure that you are aware of your current status. In that way you keep your expectations intact.

@michaelcaminiti6566 2 года назад

Just asked her to be friends... She agreed... We have a 14yr old son together and were together for 16 yrs. Been split up for 2 months did NC didnt like it.. She also monkey branched on me with a new guy........ So I just went to ask her.... so that day turned into lunch eith her and son.. asked me to work on a few things around house.. (mainly cosmetic).. At some point had a conversation about her owing me dinner and how I lover her pork chops.. (yuuk right , but hers are great).. Any way son and I went to home depot for something and he called her and asked if i bought the pork chops if we could have dinner and so we did... So left shortly after dinner.. I texted her an hour later and thanked her again for the dinner and said they were the3 b est she ever made... She responded your welcome.. Then sent me another text immediatly "I really do want us to get along. i'll always care for you. And I think we could be friends for Son.... So what you think Clay....???? Is this a pitty text or her opening up..??

@wvbassninjawvbassninja396 2 года назад

What if they are with someone else

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

There are various factors that has to be considered still. there are some people who can still be friends... like real friends with an ex without having an intent to go back to each other, but if we are using friendship as a backdoor reason along, we then have to revisit our intentions.

@Marty_Soundwerk 3 года назад

What do you mean by "actual relationship"? Is it the time or the depth?

@mercwiffamouff7301 3 года назад

What do you mean by that?

@Marty_Soundwerk 3 года назад

@@mercwiffamouff7301 Clay talks about "If you were in an actual relationship". Me and my ex have official not been together and the relationship only lasted for ~2 months.

@mercwiffamouff7301 3 года назад

@@Marty_Soundwerk i mean tbh if u guys only lasted two months i would not really worry about it too much. Don't beat yourself up over it. Tbh though i don't think there's much there to recover. I have had relationships that were short like that. It hurt for a little while but you'll be fine. I wanted to marry the woman im trying to win back. And she has a daughter that called me daddy

@mercwiffamouff7301 3 года назад

@@Marty_Soundwerk depth is important but i feel like two months isn't long enough to go that deep. But if you feel so 🤷‍♂️ like me and my ex were only 2.5 years.... But God they were the best years.....

@ClayAndrews 3 года назад

an actual relationship may also refer to a type of relationship where there is full commitment and both of you have that full knowledge that you are indeed in a relationship (something that was agreed upon and not assumed).

@noursherkawi5393 Год назад

Am friends with my ex now and she broke up with me because she's depressed and she wanna focus on herself and she need time and space so we're friends now hoping to get her back on the track soon :/

@emanuelrodriguez10 Год назад

How did it go I’m going through the same thing

@noursherkawi5393 Год назад

@@emanuelrodriguez10 we stopped talking from January lol.. don't waste your time believe they just don't want you and they are wasting your time the longer you hold on to them the longer you will feel the pain so just let go cz eventually you will get very tired

@emanuelrodriguez10 Год назад

@@noursherkawi5393 It’s been a week for me and we still talking we actually live together and it’s hard every relationship is different but hopefully everything will work out for me

@kgosanamahlong905 6 месяцев назад

When you have kids together

@swagsukeuchiha7599 3 года назад

Hell nah

@TheRedrich28 2 года назад

we were friends at the beginning then we became a couple then we broke up she said she loves me then a week later she said she doesn't anymore she told me its not me but her and we became friends again but i want her back. what sould it do? I live in Washington State and she lives is LA. Our plan was that I go and see her On the Feb 25th and she also has a very important registered nurse exam on the Feb 24th and now she had to push her exam coz she can't fucos. right now all i can think about is that she needs space even though she told me she doesn't needs space and time to fucos on her exam. now that she just broke up with me and became friends again. my plan is that im still going to LA and hope she will try and talk to me what should i do I want her back

@ClayAndrews 2 года назад

It is important to listen to what your ex needs at this time. Getting back together is not just about having the label back, but it is also working on healing and honing the Advanced Relational Skills that we talked about inside the Ex Solution Program as that will be your foundation in the process.

@TheRedrich28 2 года назад

@@ClayAndrews we are texting right now and I'm trying to give her space as much as possible and again she needs to study for her registered nurse. I probably put too much pressure on her. What should I do?

@_Tatiana_184 Год назад

The only way an ex wants to be friends with you is to use you as a backup. This is the hard truth. If someone respects and loves you doesn't play with you. If someone really wants you back, he takes the risk by trying to get you back. He doesn't afraid of anything. It's totally painful and unhealthy to pretend to be ok, to try to be friends with someone you are in love with. If someone doesn't want you, wish them the best and try to forget. ✌️