My28 y/o son died 6 months ago and he left behind an almost 5yr old daughter. She is having a hard time and misses her daddy a lot. She wants to be w me and any ppl she knows from him. I’m out of state n can’t be w her as much as I want or need to be….it’s heartbreaking all around. It sucks so bad and makes me even more depressed than I already am…thank you for explaining all of this ❤️
Thank you, that was so helpful. My daughter's at 36 lost her husband and their twin boys were 3/12 at the time. They started school only a month ago and the twin who never talked about his Dad dying, has been displaying most of the behaviours you discussed. As of today, he has been stood down for not listening and actually kicked the principle. My daughter is beside herself and I'm sure this will help. I feel so bad for her, as she starts a new job next week, kids will be on school holidays and hopefully between us we can help him. His brother talked about his Dad dying from the start and how much he misses him and he seems to be coping. I hope we can get him some professional help as well. Thank you from New Zealand
Children can't look after themselves, and if their parents die, they won't just be sad - they won't live for much longer, unless others look after them.
WOW `Children are not capable of experiencing loss in the way that we do, or sustaining it`. This has me sitting here shaking my head and with a horrified anger welling up. It is not stated as an opinion, and is also in the context of the speaker giving advice. I am aged 71 and at aged 7 my father died at home from cancer. I was profoundly close to him and I was never expected to grieve blah blah - I have profoundly experienced this loss since the day he died and my whole life collapsed and continued to collapse over and over again. He was never ever spoken about again and what I adopted was a realisation that I could not express my `spirit/soul/core` to anybody - nobody understood, huh I was just a child. I really brought myself up from there because my mother mentally and emotionally totally collapsed for the rest of her life: she had 3 mental breakdowns which required her to be hospitalised for months at a time and given electric shock treatment. She attempted suicide twice. She did remarry after 5 years or so but that didn`t change her in any way. So, I from aged 8 was mindful of how destroyed my mother was and was constantly careful not to upset her in any way. The point is that not only is the claim in the talk that I was not capable of experiencing loss is completely wrong but it is actually laughable to think that I never sustained it - it is still with me, it has affected my whole life. I ceased belonging to this planet and recall purposely detaching from life and disengaging from my core being. On the face of it, all was normal - I deliberately created a persona where that would appear to be the case. There was no one, not one adult who had any notion of what I was going through. My father has been with me throughout my life in my spirit and that was and is the real me. If a child who has lost a parent they were particularly close to listened to this section (from 9 and a half minutes on) it would further push them away. Crazily just a few minutes beforehand the speaker makes a categorical statement saying it always depends. Mmmm, then with this makes a double claim categorically.
If you had the opportunity and the resources would you move the child to a new country? We living the US but most of our family is in UK. My daughter has visited the UK several times and she gets excited about seeing her cousins. I think if I lost my husband and found myself and daughter by ourselves, I would consider moving to the UK. I wonder whether that can help to cope with the grieving or just add more trauma. Thoughts?
If you have health insurance, seeing a psychologist for grieving should be covered. Check with your insurance carrier. If you are a senior, find from local senior centers for resources that may help you grieve. Check your county to see if there are social workers who can guide you through coping with the loss. More importantly, do allow yourself to reach out for help and support for your well-being. I hope you find the above suggests helpful.
@@globaledu2876 no health insurance, and reaching out to the "social workers" is a joke where I live, that's what's wrong with Alabama, there is no mental health help that is worth anything at all, the system is broken, I watch my young adult daughter now suffer from severe depression and feel helpless because I can't find her any help