Christian Singles: Have you heard or believed these 5 things??🫣🔥 

Single 28 (almost 29) year old here. Thanks for sharing these. My church experience is that they emphasize every conference as a chance to meet someone, they ban dating on Bible college then celebrate the relationships as soon as they graduate. Their culture and groups are based on life stages and people in non married couples are invited as couples as if they’re the same status as married couples, and us singles get left behind. They focus SO much on physical boundaries and sex and “maybe you’ll meet your future spouse” while trying to stop people acting on lust… go figure. They also 10000000% push the character thing. It’s like marriage is a superiority symbol of maturity and intimacy with God when I’ve really seen it not be. Also as someone who has worked on myself A LOT over the last 10 years it’s really frustrating that people who have done next to no work on themselves are thinking I have a bad character or something. Also I think it’s all tied into the horrendous non biblical idea that effort = success. Like the “hustle” or “self help” culture the world pushes, my old churches have all pushed it too. Invest well and God will bless you. Work on your character and God will bring a spouse. Develop yourself and you’ll get that job. Steward your health well and you’ll stay healthy. It’s honestly very ableist (and I can see that now I’m disabled and chronically ill - although I still have that niggle that it’s somehow due to sin that I’m unwell, in the same way I’m single because I’ve got bad character!). The reality is, God’s plan is different for everyone and sometimes you can do all the right things and still get the worst outcome and it’s not due to personal sin, failure or flaws. Thanks for keeping it real x

It’s always this one. Love will come when you aren’t expecting it. This is a passive mindset⌛️

Hello Tiffany, thank you for making this video. I'm a 35 year old single Christian man and I'm a virgin, waiting until marriage. Thank you for saying that if you are single, that there is not anything necessarily wrong with that person's character because they are single. I do pray to God that if it is His will that I will be married, that He will send the right lady to me and that both of us will be ready for marriage too. At times its hard for me because every woman I have met and get to know and become friends with are already dating someone else, but I'm not giving up on the possibility that I will find a good woman to get married to one day.

"...I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him (Jesus Christ) who gives me strength." Philippians 4:11-13 This is the key, in a nutshell. No matter what stage of life you're in: contentment, thankfulness, and joy. If you're single, make a practice of pursuing these gifts from the Lord, and you will carry them into your marriage, giving you the best chance of success. And if, say, you have been married for a long time, and, Lord forbid, your spouse passes away or a necessary divorce happens, if you have learned to make a practice of this, you will be OK in your singleness too. At the end of the day, our relationship with Christ is what matters most.

I was not raised in Christian culture, so I cannot add anything to your very interesting and helpful list. Rather than receiving unhelpful messages, I actually received NO messages. Which is equally unhelpful, I'd say. Sure, I didn't get the message that marriage was the be-all and end-all, or that I should wait patiently in my living room for the knock on the door that would be my significant other, or that there must be something wrong with my character that God needed time to address. But I also didn't get any HELPFUL messages. About dealing with loneliness. About not letting a feeling of desperation lead to questionable judgment calls. About feeling valuable and valued even though single. I dealt with these issues for a long time (since I didn't marry till the year I turned the big 5-0).

I’ve heard ‘Jesus is enough’ or ‘you should just be content in Christ’. As someone who has dealt with abandonment and trust issues, this hurts quite a bit because I do trust Jesus but after 4 years I’m getting out into the dating realm again and days away from 44. It’s discouraging because due to circumstances, I had to be a caretaker and my career came first. I wouldn’t do anything differently but I’m hoping I can find a Godly spouse soon. Spending holidays alone is the absolute worst, NGL.

Love this so much, Tiffany! I’ll be married 2 months after I turn 29. 🙂 Your content helped sustain me throughout my singleness!

Oh my gosh! Thank you so much for sharing this! It honestly kinda makes me mad not more people are talking about this. I'm 25 and single and working on myself as much as I can in getting over fear while I am also waiting for romantic attraction to also come up cuz I havent felt it for a long time to be honest. Got your updating e course too and looking forward to learning more cuz I wanna be a wife and mom so bad.😂❤

The only thing I can encourage you Tiffany, is to forgive the ones who said things about singleness. All of us are people, and we are going to make mistakes. I said things I’m not proud of, and I thank God my perspective change over time. I hope you’ll forgive them, and thank you for sharing. Stay safe.

You touched on this a little bit, but one that I have heard from friends who are in a relationship is “once you surrender your desire to be in a relationship and stop caring about it, that’s when God will send you someone.” I think Emily Wilson did a video on that and she said that maybe that is some people’s experience, but not everyone. If you surrender and stop caring and God still doesn’t send you someone, you will drive yourself crazy trying to figure out what part you haven’t surrendered or stopped caring about. Like, you said Tiffany, it might just be that it’s not the right time.

I feel Ruth is always misunderstood by what she did with Boaz. She had to do what she had to do to survive. She had to find a man to take care of her! She didn’t do it cause she took the first step and wanted to date. She was desperate for her life.

I experienced all of this. I even had a woman tell me every year for many years that I would meet my husband that year. I’m 31 now and still not married. Thankfully I am dating a guy now and we have talked about getting married in the future.

Love this video! Just the other day I was signing up for something online and the choices for a prefix was Mr. or Mrs. 😳 I was like ? I'm neither. Where's the Miss or Ms?

I'm so thankful for you and your ministry, Tiffany 🙏

I love your videos, Tiffany! I'm in an interesting situation right now where, for one thing, I'm the one making the initial move. But these concepts are so familiar, and your healthy advice pertains to me, as well, unfortunately. But I'm grateful for you and your videos.

Love you Tiffany, you just always give us the best of both worlds!❤️

I grew up Catholic, and there was a push to get married while you’re young enough to have kids because that is “the point” of marriage. I’m 38, work FT, in grad school FT, and have a 16 y.o. kid (SA in college so father was never involved), and I had severe pregnancy complications where Drs have said another pregnancy would be deadly. Family is still asking what my plans are for how I’m going to date after graduation in July 2024 (I have 0 time right now between work, grad school, single parenting a teen) so I can marry and adopt before I’m “too old”. Um, adoption as a single parent is possible (I’d adopt a teen who is less likely to be adopted anyways). I’ve also realized in the past couple years that I’m OK on my own; if Mr. Right happens, then he does, but my life doesn’t “start” after marriage like family and my church say. I’m married to myself unless someone better comes along. 😂

Love this!! So true and encouraging:)

YES!!!! Marriage is not our life goal! I love that reminder! Tiffany, everything you touched in this video is exactly stuff I've heard before. So annoying and unbiblical, and I'm so thankful you addressed these things! Love your videos!!(:

I'm 42 and I'm not married. I wanted to be a wife and mother. I've always been told not to look for a husband and a husband will come to your door. Well, I'm 42 now, haven't seen him at my door yet? Was that advice unhealthy?

One misconception is “You shouldn’t do anything to put yourself out there because if God really wanted you married, you wouldn’t have to look for godly men to get to know.” or something that implies that. 😅

About this thing you always say that waiting on God is bad and all and you need to go and get the man/girl, I'd like to point out that sometimes God does command us to wait on him, and sometimes he says that we should take an action. Aand you always give Ruth as an example haven't you read the story of Isaac and Rebecah, where literary God brought them together without them doing anything ??! What I mean is that this is Your interpretation, but not the absolute truth.

I agree completely with the stupidity of women being miss but men are mr no matter what. Theres like this shame on women who are still single (especially if your older and single as a woman). For example: Women are referred to as “spinsters” when they are older and single, but men who are in the same position and single are referred to as “bachelors”. Notice the different terms and how one is viewed as negative whereas the other is a more positive label thats socially used. Girl don’t get me started! 🤨

I've heard as soon as you let go of dating you'll find someone. I've been single for five years.