Crusader Kings: 2.0 Review | You can (Not) Afford | Family Edition™ 

His power knows no bounds and his foresight beyond reproach

I have a feeling that Sseth can alter reality itself.

very scary very likely let’s be thankful he a benevolent Jewish African warlord

I think sseth is actually a godly being from another dimension, preparing us for his eventual domination of all of humanity

Bogged

He clearly used console commands. The male homosexual event that pops up has a max age to occur of 17. He definitely just typed event 1980 into the console and then lied about it being RNG for it to seem funnier.

@@Hyewot I'll never invite you to my party

@@KABLAMMATS You're not invited to come raid England with me.

@@KABLAMMATS Let's be honest, it's just your mom's birthday party and she said you could bring a friend.

It all starts when you're a small little altar boy.

“I’m not pro-choice, I’m pro-abortion.” - Doug Stanhope

The kids died too

@@christopher.saint.christopher Yes. The only American hero.

@@BubblewrapHighway hail the great white Stanhope that's not a racist thing that's just one of his album titles

Are you an infant?

Wow.

I guess i know what im redownloading it for now

oh god oh no

Finally.

Based

Is this Ross' mold? Is it spreading??

Hi

@Juan Cortez Muro fuck off. you dont have content and you dont earn any subs

It's not mold. It's free antibiotics.

Is this the same guy who refused to clean the mold on his plate because he was busy playing Gothic?

BASED

Came here to laugh, not to feel. Damn you and your perfidious mercantile ways Sseth!

Take the A.D.D. medication and you'll be a published philosopher in no time

Unless we're not all going to the same place, and the merchant guild goes to a different hotter and darker place And by that I mean back to the holy land of Israel of course

@@DUKEHadToDoItToEm Based

Well, life can take everything from you, even your stories. Heard of Alzheimer's?

But were they good craftsman?

@@Nyghtking that.. they weren't.

You mean... Dwarf syndrome people?? ./. They may be dwarf people, but it doesn't mean they have also a dwarf soul

ROCK AND STONE

@@TalosAcephalosROCK AND STONE TO THE BONE

If she doesn't have a child at 16, there's no hope. She's obviously barren.

@@catelyn719 - probably 80% of medieval doctors

Appropriate profile pic

@RexXflash Allah be praised. Ish-Allah

@RexXflash I'll take that as a sarcastic remark.

The textbooks must be wrong. They didn't mention the Aztec Invasion.

There was definitely a ton of incest.

@Mr. Villain Not when royal-families thought themselves as divine rulers.

@@kriskropd I feel Charles the Second of Spain wouldn't call it divine... if he knew what that was since he was beyond inbred.

@John Galt how dare you insult best boy ?

Illidan on suicide watch

What mod is that?

@@rishi7629 Guardians of Azeroth. You can no longer do that (at least if you turn the rule on).

I mean, props to the murloc for matching the bedroom prowess of a dude five times his size and with nature’s power at his fingertips.

@@glarnboudin4462 yeah but he's always sleeping, thus the need for that side bitch

bred*

**bread

@Juan Cortez Muro You really should though. You're just re-posting crap.

*bred

Thanks for bullying me about it, I fixed it.

My best game was my first attempt at playing Muslims and decided to play as a count instead of a king, see how that was. Decided I would try out some of the DLC stuff I bought and joined satanism, made my son a lunatic, increased my wealth and landmass becoming the most powerful duke in Andalusia Until I got caught and sent to prison for sexual deviancy by engaging in a cuckold relationship where satan gave my wives his BDC I bought my ransom and the caliph decided to try taking my land, not without a fight he won’t, so I rebelled, just me against the whole caliphate. Or so I thought, apparently he tried taking a lot of land from the other dukes because it became a 7 way free for all civil war with the caliph possessing a grand total of 1 county against all of the dukes. then in the middle of it, i guess to spite the eventual winner he declared war on Italy while he was at it and then by sheer coincidence a crusade was declared on one of the kingdoms in the area, So thé during this 7 way free for all civil war the Christian and Muslim armies clashed to protect their religions All of my wives kids killed each other until one demon child remained. I then cast dark spells on him, making him a possessed lunatic and just made his life hell, no real reason for it. Eventually I came out on top during this civil war, and I executed the old caliph. Drove out the Christian menace and then invited a small girl into my court to give me immortality and she gave me a potion and I gave birth to myself but not before giving myself all of my land. I was then assassinated in my crib.

@@woodlefoof2 most insane shit i’ve ever read

@@lachkickxdxdxd Just another day in CK2.

That's some Dunedain level stuff.

Goddamm! You had a child who was a complete boss! Your heir is a goddamm anime protagonist who becomes the old sensai figure

Sseth Wiki *Early life*

@@MinchPlayer Either you're a genius detective or you pulled all of that out of your ass. The only conclusions I could draw from all the videos I've seen is that he lives in London, currently studying something (probably IT related) and has a history of shitposting on 4chan

@@Assault_Butter_Knife Don't know about Russia but he has talked about going to college, medicine, lives in uk and he says all the time he is a actual jew. ADHD is prob a guess

@@MinchPlayer Wtf are you talking about, he is obviously an African ex-warlord who just wants that sweet sweet youtube money given from merchants guild to save her family from Puritant ex-Jihadists

@@sambone2809 Damn I guess I should watch more of him to get this. Also replace ADHD with light autism and we have an agreement

*second First was Salomea. Which is a name taken from hebrew and means "peace".

Hope she tasted good.

That’s the first thing that disappears in Eastern Europe

@@dosdoomguy2285 The Polish?

Blue Boy I meant hope but yes the Polish too

Just because people start to realize that the USA have a third world health care system, doesn't mean that modern medicine isn't almost uncomparably better than medieval...

@jocaguz18 Do you have a point?

Aged like milk.

@@beageler That's not the point. I'm dumbfounded people stupid as you can exist. The comment wasn't about the USA's healthcare, it was about China's sanitation. Also I'd like to add that the USA does not have anything close to third world heath care. We don't have crackheads running up to you trying to sell you used bandages when you scraped your knee.

@jocaguz18 I just got what you wanted to say, that social distancing is an atrocity just like cannibalism. Well... I don't really know what to say to that :-/

_distant wet slapping noises_

[Something suggestive about dough hooks to be finalized later]

@Mial isus I'll have 5.

She was overstocked on 5$ foot longs

@Michael Woods double that shit

"OH NO" - Joseph Joestar

Wait so his sister has her child at 6 then? Ok so the child is also officially too old.

no no, the CK logic checks out....

Youngest mother in the world was 5...

what is arithmetics ???

Incest is OK as long as you keep it in the family :^)

Its good to be Zoroastrian... or that weird Christian branch.

"Our family heirlooms are the genetics"

Fun and pure blood for the whole family.

Bro its a dinasty wich means family bussiness so keep it in FAMILY

So how about that CKIII teaser

The trailer is vague and shows no gameplay. I am disappointed.

Coffee Creamerstein The screenshots look pretty gay. The artwork is gone and replaced with 3D animated characters

Chase Wilson Nah that was a rumor that wasn’t true

Sseth is truly a god amongst men. Allah bless him

The more I watch, the more I realize him and I aren't so different...

When was this?

I can hear the Anime writers furiously writing down notes.

omfg, i want it... GIVE ME FEMALE GHENGIS KHAN THE ANIME!

"Khan-Chaaaaan~~ The chinese are rallying agaaain-dayo!" *Khan-Chan turns around in an epic way; while the camera zooms in while counterrotating to her movement; and then a jumpcut to a close-up of her mouth; where her stoic expression slowly gives way to a confident grin* "Saddle the horses; _MONGIRLIAN STEPPE TRIBE SISTER CIRCLE YAAAAHH!_ "

*FATE FRANCHISE* :Let us introduce our self's.

@@EinFelsbrocken Voiced by Aoi Yuki.

It sounds like something a dark souls npc would tell you through cryptic riddles

Gives me The masquerade of the red death vibes.

@@aemonloper1346 Aldrich's backstory from ds3 confirmed.

That kinda storytelling sounds like stuff from Kafka

It is strikingly similar to the plot of Delicatessen

@Melvin Garcia Well I don't speak French anyway

It's actually " I saw, I conquered, I came"

The lavish became mundane

Dismas resolve... *irrational*

Many fall in the face of chaos, but not this one. Not today.

Continue the onslaught! Destroy. Them. All.

*Whistles*

Unless you have alzheimers

Life finds a way

Man that ending got too real lol

It's actually a really good piece of philosophy

Cringe. Sounds like Sseth overdosed on Stirner

You can actually have up to 4 wives as a muslim,pagan,or eastern ruler

@@rezandrarizkyirianto-1933 Gods bless being a Pagan

This is best as a reformed Zunist. Then you get incest polygamy and your people loves you for it.

Absolutely Halal :))))

@@rezandrarizkyirianto-1933 no only muslims have 4 wives. Pagans have concubines that you can divorce without any consequence. Muslims have to pay one time alimony.

You're quoting him like that's not something a thousand other CK2 players haven't said before. There's a very good reason we're banned from crossposting to r/NoContext.

"Why can't I kill my kids?" Every player with too many kids and gavelkind

Sir Jocas El Jocoso they’re a mod for that I recommend it

No matter how much you may want to love and care for your innocent and ambitious little pixels, nothing will strip morals and ethics away from you like the succession warning hovering at the top of your screen and ever-reminding you that upon death your generations of blobbing will be instantly undone.

I read them! The first one is actually good, but the second one steers so far off course and is just stupid.

Aerunn Allado ...so you married her daughter...

Indeed.

Suspicious or coincidental? I'll leave that for the esteemed viewer to decide.

Don't forget it going free.

He should make a Half life 2 review

@@HackionSTx sseth wpuldnt be happy about thay

Omg.

Yes, it's one of the best ways to obtain someone else's land. Just murder everyone until their dynasty is no more.

MrPotates King late Abortion from the hangar kingdom

@@shurik121 You are goddamn right

spoken like a true jew

We gotta eat the babies -Sseth

@Joseph Ellis Yes, but specifically the Saruman-loyal uruk-hai killing the lower orcs for defying mission orders.

Then you realize she's actually a bear, so you divorce her, send her to marry the Aztec invaders, and hope she eats their emperor.

Don't worry, it's not against the law. You are the law.

incesption

True dominance is expressed by being the only male ancestor for 5 generations.

You must be new to CK.

thank Christ for muslims

Yeah because you can stone your lesbian adulter wife’s for breaking to of Allahs commandments in Sharia law.

Why? Did a goose ring a big pointless bell near you?

@Big Bad Black Dick you won't really mind us cause we are pretty much sane my dude

You mean allhamdullilah being a muslim for better accuracy

WC3 Human music was also playing during the seduction of the pope.

yeah i was like wtf is this a Warcraft game?

@@CabezasDePescado It's a mod. There are mods for everything for CK2.

@@CabezasDePescado There's just a very good Warcraft mod for it Last time I played I was an all powerful Murloch Lich that bitchslapped both the Alliance and Scourge alongside eating everyone and everthing I can get in my prison It's great!

This nigerian prince has a complex ancestry xD

Dolando Brando Sseth is an ethiopian jew

Gas

My heart is a fedpost That’s alright, one day you’ll finally have a solution to that problem.

He's russian-jewish. He said as much on his discord

Don't worry. They're so used to it, it won't hurt their feelings.

@@wesker919 oy vey

@Mial isus but sseth admitted he was jewish

@Mial isus ur gay

All Religions include incest and pedos, its prety common. Nothing surprising about it.

👌

It would be a waste of money if we didn't get some Yoda CBT.

I too enjoy watching my dollar fly by on the screen

Even at that speed it takes 2 min and 30 secs to go through the whole thing. The merchant guild is getting bigger by the day.

CBT has just been all over my life recently

Sseth has a fuckton of patrons...

or when your prisons are crowded so you hit that magical button. Then you get 100+ death sounds from men to women to children and it is a beautiful symphony of voices screaming out until.... silence. I swear I am not psychopathic.

Sometimes to let out some steam I just mass execute my prisoners. Fuck the council, I am king and I want them dead

@@a-drewg1716 you are just a normal ck2 player, beyond any psychopathlogies

@@pedrolmlkzk Our goals are beyond even our own comprehension. Capable of complex thought, yet entirely ruled by our primitive drives.

@@a-drewg1716 someone finally put it into words

touma thanks.. I hate this

It's technically just part 4 of Gulliver's Travels

sounds like some shitty Doujin

@@SeruraRenge11 I love that book

@@mariano1196 *Holy*

Ah, I see you are a lilim of culture as well.

IS THAD A MOTHAFUKKEN NEON GENESIS EVANGELION REFERENCE???!!! :)

For this game, that sentence is correct

I recognize this from Charles Ives' "Majority"!!

But that was 15 years ago.

In fact, almost all the death sounds are done by Paradox employees.

Also, one of the CK2/3 devs did actually work on the Lego games.

@@kajjez Now that's info.

Kudos to the actress who did the crushed to death screams, mixed with the foley sounds they are definitely the most intense of the death noises.

Um. Former?

But... Seth is both gae and married *HE IS DOUBLE GEI*

@Focus Support pls Don’t worry, the two gays cancel out

foda

He must be utra gay for being married to a trap bodypillow

@@Circ00mspice If we do the math he is indeed ultra gay

Still better that that god-damned squirming organic matter that ends up flying away that happens in the summer because you recycle most of your trash and so only rarely throw out the organic garbage...

​@@BlueTemplar15 Elaborate.

I read this in his voice XD

ANOTHER????

e x t r e m e c o i t u s

There's absolutely no reason for it to not exist and he do that. I really believe it's out there in London, waiting for a fan to pick up and upload the pic of it on Reddit.

im almost autistic enough to go and check lol

I would bet that it definetly exists.

I'm cycling to where he said now

Marcos Wicket it’s in London though right

What?

LMAO how is that even possible??

I don't like how correct this is.

"hey hey people chef here"

When the family tree is a straigth line

This, only every time I start CK2.

@Sad Phrogé There is

@Sad Phrogé There's mods for that. You wont find them in steam workshop though.

@@Kuolonen Where do you find them then? Is there like a Lover's Lab for this game? Asking for my penis

Sad Phrogé Dark World Extras my guy

me: "Laughs in 0$ deal spend on pirate bay

@@ujug.g5592 cs.rin.ru is a good site for it as well

I bought the game and five mayor DLC for 1 Buck, lol.

I just paid for the base game and pirated all the DLCs. Makes it possible to use Mods

"These ones right here, officer" 👮

@@lordmunchkin8396 Not to mention how Stellaris Changed from being completely standalone from all the other Paradox Grand Strategy games to now just a poorly made Viccy II Mod where the AI is even more broken that usual and you may or may not be in space. but for all intense and purposes you might as well be on a singular planet for all of being an Interstellar Empire is.

Warhammer references...Mostly Warhammer references

with furry and alien hentai mods of course

@@lordmunchkin8396 Greetings from late 2020 and the era of the "Loading: 30% ... 30% ... 30%" debacle. The game reloads from scratch for each and every mod you have active. End my suffer.

@@mmouse1886 "...for all intense and purposes..." Brilliant. Only "for all intense porpoises" sounds dumber than that.

And thats a dude.... Ew

המולך

Marryloc marries Jaina Proudmrgl

I can hear Arthas screaming internally in the Shadowlands.

Jesus!! I can hear every fan boy screaming because of the lore.... Damn... I need to play this, now

@@sorrowsinme I don't think anything can be worse, than what Blizzard already doing with the universe since...idk, Lich King?

@@luscinius2933 People like you ruin games. Just so you know.

Popesicle hah

Poppu-sama wa kawaii desune~

Oh, and here I was just about ready to commit adultery on my sister-wife with her youngest daughter.

Merchant Guild has no shame

did you even look at those burgers. I'm gonna hurl lol.

oh yeah, how much joy where those times!

And dying the next moment

2 months late but username checks out.