Recognizing that you aren't the only one in the picture is huge! I got married at 22, and have never once looked back--my wife and I have the understanding that no matter what happens in life it's us vs. the problem. That mindset shift makes a world of a difference.
its literally all soiboi azn skidmarks that have no game and their only hope is to drive a girl home and make her feel awkward like she owes you something GHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
"Odds are good but the goods are odd" is what I hear all the time in Seattle too! Also the point about us vs. the problem instead of me vs. you, 100%! Loving these episodes more and more, can't wait for next week!
I really like the topics of all the episodes so far! Good job guys. My take on relationships and life in general, I always remind myself: "The constant pursuit of something 'better' can overshadow the happiness you already have. True fulfillment might lie in appreciating what you've got." Always chasing for happiness even though you've already got it makes you think that you're miserable.
being okay with your partner being sexual with other woman can also be a defense mechanism you set up so that if your partner ends up "cheating" on you, you can just tell yourself you gave that person permission to do so. Being okay with this dynamic also means that you are actually afraid of full on commitment and thus not ready to be in a fully committed relationship.
It IS full commitment. People just get enjoyment out of, uh, cucking, I guess? Not for everyone, of course, but it work(ed) for Kira, so what is the issue here?
As much as I appreciate how candid everyone is, feel like a fly on the wall listening in on someone’s private/personal convo. Feels like I’m eavesdropping 😂. Big up to Kevin tho, he’s a real one 🫡
This episode is so funny, it’s like actually sitting down with friends and getting into some really good tea, and getting to see another side of your friends. Thanks for inviting us in y’all, my shoes are off and I’m having a great time!
4:29 huge respect to their openness !! Opening relationships often has a bad rep and i find it really eye-opening to see couples that feel comfortable in doing so, and even talking about it to create more discussion on this topic
I haven't spoken to Kevin in over 15 years (since middle school) but it's so heartwarming to see Kevin hasn't changed since then (and how Chloe talks about him)! Wishing you guys all the best from afar! ❤
Chloe, Kevin is actually a super rare guy. His love is much deeper than you know. Faith in love is in short supply in the world. Don’t mess it up. You all really need to listen to really old people that have truly lived and been with someone for 35-60 years. I’ve met some amazing people. The most important aspect of life is to find someone that truly loves you. Career means nothing!,…. money, travel are all just fillers for the love and acceptance we all need. People in the late 80’s have such loving stories. None of those stories start out with “we where a great power couple”. 🤮 The friendships you make and the love you share is all you can take with you. Kiara, as a Dom I can tell you that yes, what you have is a kink. As long as you and your man are happy, nothing else matters. You will probably find your love will be deeper than most other couples. Sharing a kink can bond two people in a way that is much deeper than the average couple.
Also Kira is def a dommy mommy 🤣🤣 knowing both her and her partner - they’re very on the same page and have deep mutual love and respect despite some wild preferences haha. Theyre growing a lot together in ways I also find incredible as a friend! I cherish both of them deeply - chloe
this episode is hilarious omg!! so much laughs intertwined with splashes of true wisdom lol love the thoughts of act of committing and 1/3 of "no. N". Also the episode shows true color, eric and chloe both teddy bears but eric a cuddly one and chloe one with a knife for surrrrre, a true savage 🤣
This episode and the next one were how I found this channel and were wildly helpful for me as a 29 year old who is about to let himself date for the first time again after 12 years. The candid whys and hows of it all were so awesome to hear, really confidence inspiring.
Loved the podcast, definitely had some funny moments in there but low key made realize how swallow you gotta be in the dating world, you would think just be truthful would be the best thing to do
The amount of crazy dating stories we’ve all heard in SF, NY and LA have been absolutely wild. Dating is definitely a complicated thing :( everyone has their own stories. glad u enjoyed this episode!!
This is the first video on this channel I listened to, so idk if Kevin is a reoccurring character. I feel bad for Kevin too. I've been a filler friend, the extra friend you didn't originally intend to invite to a group event, and it's a bad feeling. Being described as the reliable guy who will do anything for someone gives me sad placeholder friend vibes. Happy to hear Kevin's value is fully seen and appreciated in the end.
Definitely like the podcast overall. But I think what got me the most during that portion of the segment is her wording. And this is not shot at her, she was just being accurate with her words. But her using phrases like, "leading on", her being the one to break off the dates, seeing Kevin as the reliable guy for things like the Facebook event, etc. Edit: Kevin was 40% of things on the list of 25 after she came back from Lisbon. Oof. Man. Respectfully, that was tough to listen to.
And she was so nonchalant describing him like that, if the tables were turned and kevin described her in the same way, watch the me2 movement go ballistic.
He won though. A girl wanting to be with you for life even though you dont have all of the qualities she wants already says a lot. It just means a deep connection you can't clearly notice from the outside is much more important than a shallow list.
Such weird ideas about dating. The only hard and fast deal breakers should be loyalty, kindness and willingness to work through problems. Those are the indicators of a long lasting relationship. This is gender independent. High income, perfect looks, height, hair color, preferred activities and similar qualities don’t matter if the other person isn’t a good person. If someone is kind, always give them a shot regardless of any other preferences. If it doesn’t work it doesn’t work, but you might be surprised by how happy you might be with that person. Chloe in particular seems to have almost missed out on a really good guy because of wrong dating priorities.
As someone in an open relationship I really relate. I feel like human connection is so diverse and love can be so expansive and it sucks that we feel self conscious because of the heteronormative judgement from others.
15:00 - That movement is "ice in my veins". Where did the “ice in my veins” celebration come from? D’Angelo Russell (LA Laker): It’s something my dad said growing up. He always said you have to be prepared for big moments, you gotta have ice in your veins. You have to have no feelings. You have to go out there and play your hardest and do what you do. That was the celebration what I performed well and knowing he prepared me mentally.
The finger thing thing definitely works. I know they're joking around a bit afterwards but honestly it's down to timing as well, similar to the "come home with me" line. Had that line been used at the wrong time, or had the finger suck move been done at the wrong time, it'd be quite different.
To be fair, that 49er thing only applies to transplants, and the term was coined by a transplant from New York. Locals who grew up here have never even heard of such a term (other than the football team). Also, Kira reminds me of a local news reporter here in the Bay Area named Betty Yu.
While it was an engaging conversation, I walked away feeling a little depressed after listening to the two dating episodes. I know the covo is meant to be unfiltered…but some of the comments def gave me the ick/made me feel sad to hear how smart and talented people are still attached to hurtful gender stereotypes. For example, when Kiera says cuddling with a shorter guy feels like holding a baby? Like…how is that supposed to make someone feel if they’re dating a shorter guy? It comes off as super disrespectful even though it’s meant to be a personal preference.
I mean I think your reaction to that is something you should look into/reflect on for yourself. There's no reason to really be upset with these people for having these preferences. I'm a short guy and it's literally never bothered me. I don't really care if she is attached to gender stereotypes. Like so what if a girl might initially feel that way. I'm confident enough that if I was interested in a girl - I would try to make her look past that. If she can't look past that no matter what, she's being judgemental and missing out on a great catch. Her loss not mine y'know?
Smh its not gonna end well in these types of relationships someone will be hurt at the end and feel forced to accept such toxic relationships dynamic😵💫
9:10 as she makes this point it feels more like that was her conclusion and he had to go along with it because he cared about her and wanted to be with her moreso than he also felt that way. especially since he doesnt have the experience to be sure for himself.
Love your vibes! You guys are so fun to listen to; it feels like chatting with friends over lunch :) Just wanted to share a thought on open relationships and sexual purity in general. Please know I'm not here to shame or judge anyone, including myself, as many of us have imperfect pasts. Personally, I believe that sexual purity, or saving yourself for marriage, is incredibly sacred. I see sex as something deeply intimate, reserved for that special someone (aka your your husband or wife through marriage). While open relationships and casual encounters might seem fun, they can have lasting impacts beyond the moment. From my experience of waiting until marriage (which wasn't easy), I can say it's been incredibly rewarding and well worth the wait. If you've already gone down a different path, there's no shame or guilt AT ALL. Just consider the value of staying pure moving forward (and avoiding porn). It's truly worth it! Remember, your worth and how much you're loved aren't determined by anyone else. You are inherently loved and worthy just as you are.
Wow, I truly love how unfiltered, entertaining, but real this episode was. Kira's perspective on dating is so interesting to hear, would love to have her on more as a guest :-)
I'm a little behind so I'm listening to this one today and the newest one tomorrow. WOW I did not know we could have another level of experiences in JOMO. My face was literally Chloe's! Although I'm curious to see that documment you sent to Eric since I'm too helping a friend who's turning 30, NEVER dated, and is in need of advice! If you have any data, contact me please :D I feel like a part of a gang now, love this! Thank you all!
fair point fair point!! not gonna say it's the right thing to do but it's the one that gets you on the feed 👀 also my taller girlfriends who match with guys "the same height" would explicitly ask if they're actually that height or not haha. it's a thing! - chlo 😅
6:17 - Exactly, and you should want to know that your man is desired by other women, it's female nature - this is not toxic at all and it's such a shame anyone tells you that
same!! this was a great episode. The banter/convo is so fun btwn the 3 of you!! Kira is really funny and seems like a sweetheart, would love to see her come back for another ep!
I wonder if the reason you like chucking is because of your first relationship, it happened before but you were taken gaslighted instead of actually acknowledging the real situation
A nan that tries to get a woman to go home with him when he knows she is in a relationship is a peice of garbage. Turn it around, if it was a woman offering her boyfriend the same offer, would she attach such a positive conotation the proposition.
5:03 - This shouldn't be controversial because one-sided open relationships are actually the healthiest set up for most women and there's good reason for it. Most women who 'lock down' their man end up feeling not attracted over time because they're castrating his natural masculinity and outwardness, and the man also ends up dissatisfied. A man should have multiple women that he is _devoted_ to and wants to have kids with - not just be open for the sake of sleeping around. Also it's beneficial because if the women like each other, they can help each other raise kids. Call me crazy, but that's exactly how human tribes were before.
with the simps part... Women tend to be overly attracted to a guy who will push the right buttons at the right time. Some awkward men probably dont know how to or are afraid to do it and therefor will be overlooked a lot more. If Women learned to be a little bit more pragmatic in their choice they will find a good man for them a lot sooner. These days its really easy for men to be afraid to do certain things because you see a lot of women complain all the time. But I firmly believe the women complaining are also the women who choose very poorly a lot of the time. So it's a vicious circle which needs to be broken. And the only way I see it is for women to start to make better choices for men. And to make better choices they need to be a little bit more pragmatic
