My Gramp had sundowners. One day he told me he knew what he was saying and doing was wrong but he had no control over it, and things seemed so real to him even though he knew they weren't. That was the only time I ever saw my Gramp cry. He was 94. I know he's in heaven, but I still miss him.
Grandma was happy to live in a hoarded home with thirty five cats filth and disgusting home. Now she is unable to drive to shop for more hoard or cat food. Now at our safe clean home she wants to fight at night and listens to no one. Slapped me hard because we were making her lay down in bed instead of wander around. She is mean and her behavior has let me know this is a horrible job for nursing home workers for sure! Dr. Was right they get violent so having more than one family member to help is vital. This is a physical job the heavy older person is very hard to help up and down. Thankful for my son to help and furniture moving to barracade the sundowner from unsafe areas.
Dr.Natali, I was surprised to hear that sundowning happens more with dementia sufferers in their own home than in a nursing home facility. I work in a long term care home and experience daily the sundowning patterns in the people to whom we provide care. I was thinking that the more familiar environment (ie :their own home) would produce less sundowning. One woman will tell me that she needs to go to visit her mother and will ask me to show her the door to get outside. I went on Google Maps and took screen shots(with my iphone) of the city street views where she told me that she lived when she was a child. The office enlarged and laminated the pictures. When she asks to go home now, I take out the pictures and we talk about the place where she grew up. She tells me stories about her mother and the children who used to play games in the neighbourhood. Usually her emotional tank gets replenished and she no longer asks to leave. I love your videos and have shared them with some co-workers.
Hi Gregory! Thank you for your comment. I am glad you are finding the videos helpful! Let me know if you or your co-workers have any ideas for future videos.
I am a Geriatric Carer-codinator for over 30 years and I've experienced that if they have bladder infection that is when it manifest in their behavior, or if they constipated. One just have to have a to always keep a close eye on those two. I was had a patient, she was acting out, and with close examination, I found her blouses label behind the neck was scratching her, I immediately cut the label of and it made a use difference because she couldn't verbalize what was bothering her. So from there on I've been cutting of all my patients clothing labels ,so I know when they have behavior challenges it's not because of a clothing label that bothers them. I keep learning so much from your channel. Thank you so much Dawn From South Africa 🇿🇦
In my experience, especially with women, sundown ing happens around 4pm to 6pm. They usually just want to go home, no matter that you tell them they are home. This is the time the children would have come home from school and meals are prepared. It’s the busiest time for a woman and the anticipation of family arriving. They have a gap and feel the emptiness that’s not been filled. I take my client to the kitchen and busy them with dinner prep. Peeling veg and discussing menus. Keep them busy. Or take them for a walk.
Thanks that is so interesting - for someone I care for where she was a mother and also ran a small hotel so she was always doing meal prep and I see that worry about the meals in the early evening/late afternoon.
This makes so much sense. I once observed this in a resident. She began saying she wanted to go home & crying. I then remembered I had bought her a baby doll, & retrieved it from my car. Happy, contentedly named her after her sister. Problem solved👍🏼😊
Thank you for your work and the fact that you share. My wife recently passed away Dec 11th from Vascular Dementia. It was a very rough several years, especially when I didn't know what was going on. Your teachings helped a lot. Dementia is a wicked indiscriminate disease. The last few months were very difficult dealing with the healthcare system. I was able to bring her home (AMA) on Hospice for a couple days before she was taken to inpatient Hospice, where she passed peacefully and is no longer suffering. God bless you and my prayers for others who are living this hell.
Agree ~ I wish I'd studied these videos sooner. It would have helped me with my client on those days that can be so challenging. As well...I wish there were videos to help the kids of clients with dementia ~ In terms of how much communication can sometimes be too much. Overload, exhausting...suffocating . The job itself is enough but some kids call in the morning, twice in the afternoon and after work. I'm all about communicating but sometimes it's just over the top. And they want to discuss many things outside of their parents health. It causes burnout in the care provider.
Thank you for your helpful tips! My husband was diagnosed with dementia 3 years ago! I am having a hard time. I find myself crying a lot. I have lost interest in the things I used to enjoy doing! He does have sun downing symptoms and it’s not easy to deal with along with all the extra caring of him. I feel like I have lost myself taking care of him!
I recently found out my mom has dementia. I was the same way. There is support out there. You just have to look hard. I am soo blessed to have found Careblazers!!! You will get thru this. We don't have a choice. I will keep you and your family in my prayers.
Thank you for your fantastic videos! I'm a nursing assistant in a high care facility, I know my residents very well but as some pass away and we have new admissions, it's really helpful to keep a clean slate, fresh perspective and remember that every person is different, complex, beautiful and deserving of the utmost quality in care.
I am caring for an 81 year old who was diagnosed with Alzheimer's recently. Things were going well until recently they started having sundowner's symptoms. Late at night they have come to me all confused, agitated, and frightened. It is accompanied with hallucinations that someone is spying on them and or coming into their bedroom. They also seem to see things that are not there like an animal by a tree that's not there a closed door looks open to them. To deal with it, I say and do things that reassure them they are safe, or accompany them to their hallucination to show them it isn't real. I also make sure I do not poo poo what they feel and see. I acknowledge what has them agitated and let them know I believe they are seeing or feeling what they find upsetting. I simply let them know something is not going to continue to happen because I have set in place things to prevent it. That means showing I set the house alarm, that the door they think is open is locked, etc. Not easy, but I am hoping patience and time will help lessen if not eliminate their worries.
Real simple: they’re afraid of the dark. Already don’t know what day or time it is so sundown is meaningless except as an ending without a beginning. A bad harbinger. Put simply, what happens next? Nothing. Nothingness. So she rejects it, staring wide eyed into space, fixated on television or starting the pacing and the arranging/rearranging of stuff all night. My loved one has no routine and does not want one. She stays up night after night eating everything but insists that she sleeps all night. Then sleeps all day! Then switch !! When she does fall out after everyone else has, it’s time to get up. Refuses walks, does what she wants. So. Good luck with that. Sound cynical? Tough. The alarm keeps her in and I turn in early and wake early so I can have peace and get my rest. The bright light is good. The music is for me. Many many behavioral changes. I have found nothing helpful. Her doctors need to adjust her meds imho and start over because her disease seems to outpace all efforts to intercede, redirect or whatever. In this household, we just go with the flow, choose our battles and do our best. Not wrestling anyone into bed or out of it for that matter.
I don't take any meds for stress, I buy me a bag of Peanut Butter M&Ms lol and a Bottle of flavored Seltzer Water. I don't drink, do drugs or smoke...I do chocolate lol
Exactly! It’s like the circle of life has come full circle. Your person has become or is becoming a small child again and their needs become the same as a small child or infant. Remember how your activities were with a young or infant you might have cared for with noise and low activities toward the afternoon and early evening.
A friend of ours gave her Mum some magnesium in the late afternoon It’s a natural anti-anxiety substance and worked really well to help with sundowning
I found that smacking my mother over the head with a waffle iron works great. She is out until the morning. JUST KIDDING FOLKS! EVERYONE NEEDS A LITTLE HUMOR TO HELP EASE THINGS.
Caring for someone 24/7 is unimaginable. You information may be well meaning but until you live with a person with dementia one could never understand the patience, frustration and deprivation of sleep can do to the caregiver. I was a nurse for 44years and cared for many patients with dementia. It is a whole different world caring for someone ever day and night.
I understand. I’m a nurse too. I brought my mother into my home for 3 years. She was finally diagnosed with probable Lewy Body, one month before she passed. I’m sorry for your pain.... God Bless you, take care 🙏🏽 It was the hardest thing I ever did, and I was a Hospice nurse for 12 years.....
Boy, is that ever the truth! Hearing about it or even watching someone else go through it is nowhere near equal to experiencing it yourself. Until one has personally experienced it, they can never fully understand how it is.
I can totally relate I take care of both my elderly parents better in the moderate plus dementia range 24/7 365 days a year and I've done it for years by myself with no help. I have literally had to completely pause my life. I'm 60 years old and I'm completely worn out Body Soul and Spirit I just hope I can Outlast them that's where I'm at. Anyway God bless you as we overcome day by day.
My mom has classic sundowners. Right around dusk she starts to have trouble walking etc. I attribute some of this to visual problems/hallucinations and perhaps losing confidence about her surroundings. Funny because during the day she is a very sharp ninety-three year old. I bought her a sound machine and this has helped her immensely with her sleeping. You are right, don’t ever argue with your elderly loved ones. Thanks for you insight and help!
EdWilsonPhoto Yes, one that you put by your bed for white noise. Also has sounds of rain, babbling brook etc. this really helps with her tinnitus and to generally cope.
I love your channel! ♥️. All of the videos have been soooo helpful! My mom has had Alzheimer’s for almost a year and it’s been so difficult communicating and trying to help her without getting frustrated. I agree with Coral….what a blessing you are! Thank you! 😘
Thank you so much for providing this helpful information .. your calm and reassuring manner only add to the value of your videos.. it is most appreciated
My husband has dementia and he is also hearing and sight impaired. It is very hard to try and help him at times because lots of times he doesn’t know who I am and or he thinks I am a man. . He has sundowners and it starts from 4.30pm until bedtime 9pm
Super-helpful, thank you. You have explained why my mother in law's sundowning improved hugely when she stopped living independently and went into full care. She wants her independence back, but clearly, full care is better for her. We disconnect our landline phone at night so we don't get chatty calls in the small hours. She has a clock which states "morning" or "evening",etc, but still gets confused sometimes. I really appreciate this channel thanks!
I was a caregiver for my father who had dementia -like symptoms as a result of a stroke. Eventually his doctor prescribed a very low dose of Haldol during the day and Klonopin for sleep at night. During the day, my father was most agitated about wanting to drive. He kept wanting his car keys and kept looking outside for his car. I had locked the keys in a file cabinet and put his car in the garage in back of the house. But he still wanted to go outside to get his car, so that is why the doctor prescribed the Haldol so he would sit still. My father as a result of the stroke had lost sight in one eye and was too confused to ever drive again and he didn't need to be outside without supervision. He was also insisting on cooking, but he was too confused and scalded himself and set a can with its wrapper onto the flames of a burner and nearly caught the house on fire. so we had to get him on a medication.
As you suggest, 6:47 sunlamps DO work, they keep the orientation around the day time schedule, especially when winter comes with daylight savings, the sunlamps DO work, turn on at twilight, leave on 1-2 hours. Also fresh air and nature IS MUCH better than most things. Walk outdoors, even if its short, even if its mostly just driving around. The exposure to a new stimulus especially nature and fresh air works better than most things. And do music instead of TV...TV makes dementia worse
@@rllmm8290 yes but you can’t judge by what they’re saying. My mother had the same issue with a drink. But weening her off drinking helped immensely. Now I let her watch a little tv but it’s always interrupted with walks and fresh air. In my experience it is the pattern they are fixated on. So they get agitated because their pattern is being interrupted. It takes a while but new patterns will improve her. Tv absolutely destroys them
Thank you. It is so difficult unless you have lived it. Dr. you have either lived it or are truly have an empathetic heart that can not just be learned. That is a truly special ability to make You a better Doctor
Hi Doc...As the primary caregiver for my 75 yr old wife who has vascular dementia your videos have been immensely helpful and encouraging. THANK YOU! You recently did one on 'thought salads', and it was remarkable. As an ordained minister of the Christian faith I immediately saw the direct correlation to Philippians 4: 4 - 9. Brilliant!...God bless
My mother's Sundowns everyday at 2:00 just like clockwork everyday is exactly the same over and over and she has every symptom you talk about it's so exhausting I have learned so much from these videos.. even though I know the right thing to do it's hard because I'm so tired by the end of the day she just wears me out.. I call it the bewitching hour .. I can deal with the mornings she's pretty good but when 2:00 strikes she's unbearable. She goes into a panic if I'm out of her sight.. And she wants to go to bed early. Right after dinner. she knows something's wrong and feels safe going to bed and I can't stop her but it gives me a break too.. she sleeps for 2 or 3 hours and she's up every hour for the bathroom after that.
My wife started with sundowners after lunch and dinner this April , used to be only in the late afternoon earlier in the evening, now is twice a day. Dr Natalie thank you for your video and for your time
Wow, a change in behavior could be caused by an infection? That's important to know in a lot of instances. I would love to hear a talk on how infection results in behavioral changes.
A little piece of knowledge I learned is that urinary tract infections are more common in elderly women (I don't know about men) and they can as was said here cause symptoms that will go away when the infection is treated. I try to encourage baths twice a week, because I know for sure personal hygiene is getting more challenging for my mother. I hope she can keep infections at bay this way.
Urinary Track Infections are VERY common in dementia patients. Please note the medications they are taking and research the side effects. The result of a Urinary Trak Infection can lead to aggression, loss of balance, delusion and various others symptoms. It is so hard for them to tell you there is something wrong as with a child. My mom was placed in a mental facility after displaying severe aggression towards staff and other patients. Fortunately the facility was apart of a good hospital. They ran test and my mom had a LITER of urine in her body as a result of the infection. I was so very angry as I felt the facility where she was living should have noticed she was not urinating and they should have know to check for this considering she had been there for awhile. If I may also add, the facility where she was living was a private facility. They become our kids as we were theirs at some point in our lives. We have to pay close attention to the changes they are experiencing and research as much as possible. UTI's are COMMON and DANGEROUS!!!
Get a case of 'jungle rot' in your crotch! Your behaviour will change suddenly until it is fixed. Don't ask how I know this but imagine what it would be like for someone who can't communicate well!
Thank you for the video. My dad has Dementia. He has started to have these sundowning symptoms. He constantly wants my attention at night times and also into early mornings along with severe confusion. I thought he was craving for people's love and attention. That's the impression he has been giving as he also did it after light on quite a few days. I've also noticed this happens at times of infection with my dad. His is definitely very sudden.
lisa kels , I’m sorry that your dad has dementia ♥️. I don’t know much about dementia etc, I’m a bit slow but it just dawned on me that the sun downing thing must surely be related to the patient regressing to a child like state... esp. in Alzheimer’s. You know, when as children, we were all very insecure about the dark and so forth, and needed our parents to stay with us and cuddle us before bed. Some children also need to sleep in their parents bed, to feel secure. It must very hard for you, and others, whether they’re carers, or family members, to be able to provide those suffering dementia, with the reassurance they seek, and need. It’s a very time consuming process, and probably exhausting. I find it very sad and troubling that folks with dementia don’t often get what they need, to stay psychologically secure. I’m not judging anyone when I say that, of course. These patients have needs that are often difficult to meet, and obviously are very time consuming and intensive. The only solution I can see, is the establishment of an army of highly trained volunteers, to work with patients throughout the day and night. Yes, I’m an idealist, but I can’t help it 😬. I recognise that our parents were our full time carers as children, and spent many long hours in meeting all our needs, until they were exhausted. Surely we could organise ourselves, as adults, to assist them in their final years on earth..... 🤔♥️
My husband wakes up about 1am and starts talking.. I tell him it's the middle of the night but he keeps up. I leave the bedroom and camp out on the couch
My sister was only 57 yrs old with lewybody dementia is very difficult to deal with. She sees people, is sometimes afraid, scared they tell her she going to die. She believes what they tell her. It is very sad to watch and live all this. Noone professional ever tells you what to come next. All's I am told you need help but given no help about it. She can't afford nursing home. The state programs have a income requirement she doesn't qualify .
They really need to do more and not sweep dementia under the rug. That is how I feel. Not much said about early on set dementia only elderly dementia .thank you for being here 11:00 11:00
I’m watching this again n I see my comments here from the last time I watched it. I must say how beneficial it is to rewatch your videos. I get something different every time simply because of my Mom’s decline. Thank you again for all your help. I really appreciate your channel. 💝🌎💝
Personal sleep deprivation was a major issue while caring for my mother. If I got 4 hours of sleep, it was a blessing. Melatonin helped a bit but it was when the doctor prescribed Quetiapine Fumarate 25mg that she would finally sleep 💤💤 for hours straight. The pills are so small, one wonders how they are able to work.
My dad definitely had sundowning, it could be minor to severe, one day he thought that he was onboard a ship that was sinking (old memory from his time in the Navy). It was espescially bad if he happened to sleep during the day, he'd wake up and be really very confused.
So glad I just discovered your channel! After multiple ER visits, my mom was diagnosed with vascular dementia. She frequently has sundowners syndrome and very irregular sleep (if any sleep).
You are alway’s helpful ! My ex husband is caring for his second wife that has always been difficult. She seems to have moved to another stage. She no longer recognizes her beautiful and super intelligent daughter. I feel so frustrated that I cannot help. I am disabled and limited to help as I would like. This disease is so horrific, so sad.
Dr. Natali, thanks for another very helpful video. I'm learning so much from your past videos now that I've found your site. I'm recommending it to everyone in my support group. This video was very timely. My mother exhibits this "Sundowners" , every single day. Even if she has not had a memory problem (and has been "normal" all day). At ~ 8 PM she starts asking about or looking for her mother or other relatives (long sense deceased). You may recall, I am battling Doctors (Neurologists) who indicate there are no signs of Dementia based on her MRI, - and thinks she has some type of cognitive anxiety disorder brought on by depression. I would think a person is depressed "all" the time and not just at night. I have to think this is a clear sign of dementia. Nevertheless, even if there is nothing on MRI, I have to think the cognitive testing will tell the tell. If my mother passes the cognitive testing with no issues - the next step will be for "me" to see a psychiatrist!!!
Thank You so much for all of your information. I will be using all of your tips to help my 97 year old grandfather. You are blessing to me, Again, THANK YOU!
I recently found your site and I'm now subscribed. You are an Angel.❤️ I am living in my Mom's home taking care of her...she's 102! Thank you for your very helpful videos. God bless you.🤗
My childhood best friend moved into my mother/daughter apartment and things were great. But, she started having memory problems, shuffling feet and other issues. Doctors thought she might have Parkinson's due to her shaking. I thought she might have NPH and got her tested and a shunt was put in. This helped a lot. Fast forward, her memory is worse and worse. She cannot learn how to work new things, and sometimes even old technology confuses her. She falls a lot. Anytime she is hospitalized for a few days, she improves her UTI. That usually begins confusion and more falling. So when the infection is cleared up, she then gets hospital delirium. And then being transferred to rehab she gets more confused. Once home, she improves and goes back to a baseline. Maybe a little less than before. However, this last time when she came home from the hospital and rehab, she began sundowning at home. I was startled because she usually gets less confused after a few days of being home. I work third shift and she appeared to be doing fairly well in the morning, as you said. But, when I checked on her before going to work, she was all packed up, clothes, medicine, etc. She asked when are we going home. I was gobbsmacked. I should have said tomorrow and lets go to bed now....but I was direct and said this is your home. It was confusing to her. But, I reminded her of our trip down to my house and moving in. She trusts me a lot so even though she was skeptical of living here, she thought, well, yes....my pictures are all hanging on the walls, so you must be right. It happened over the next few nights. Thank goodness, by the second week she was oriented to home. She knew her mother had died and her dog. I was beginning to think I needed to place her in a nursing home for fear she'd go outside when I was at work looking for her dog or some other thing. I've talked to her doctor and took her off any medicine that has a side effect of loss of balance or memory and she's doing well. So, I wonder if sundowning is something that can come and go as this seemed to do.
When my mom (87) starts getting agitated after she is in bed for the night (930-10pm) I play a youtube of the rosary and we pray together. She will doze off soundly after 3/4 decades.
I installed in the kitchen and living room light fixtures avian light bulbs. I did this because I had birds in the living room and it’s an open floor plan between the kitchen in the living room. The lightbulbs seem to help my mother as well, who had Alzheimer’s. I noticed after installing them for my birds that for a while mom seem to be better and not talking about going home. Are used to pull out a photo album and ask her if she would like to see some pictures of family if she said yes, I would sit down with the photo album and have her tell me who the people were. It was a way of her going home. We would have supper around that time as well. It always started around 4 PM. Sadly my mother passed away October 20, 2020. She did so with her family around her at home, the way she would’ve wanted it.
I'm sorry to hear that Joanna. I'm hosing a live Careblazer Class on caregiver stress in a week and I'll be taking people's questions. It's free and you are welcome to attend if you think it would help. Here is the registration page: www.careblazers.com/p/registration-page
My sister and I take care of our 89 years old mother. She has Dementia/ Alzhimers disease thanks to Covid 19. It sped up the process. She is blind in one eye and very hard of hearing. She will not quit talking and she does it mostly through the night. I sleep in the same room with her but I loose sleep every night. When she speaks, it is somewhat slurred. My parents and I moved down here to Florida from our home in Tennessee so my sister can help. Hospice here is nowhere near as good as they were in Tennessee. My dad and her have been married 64 years. We got them a place on the list for an assistant living closer to my home in Tennessee. Our parents are needing more care than we can give.
Just found your informative vids... For me when Sundowing is unmanageable I'd take mom for a drive and that worked magic after 10min in the car... her mood is calmer and gives me chance to refocus to another topic.
Thank you! This is SOOOOOOO hard! My heart breaks for my Mom. I am the only child and full time caregiver. A0t 65, I have no steength. Most days I just pray for God to not wake me up. My love for her keeps me going. She deserves it and God will bless me. I have nobody to call on. "But God...He is faithful!
God bless you! He helps me too! I am my mom's full time caregiver too. It just happened that way, since I'm not married and have no children and I love my mom so much. I come from a large family, but everyone else has other responsibilities, and sometimes I feel bitter about it, but I try not to. Some family members are very toxic and along with taking care of my mom, I have to protect her and myself from them. It's been a very stressful and trying two years, and I wouldn't be able to get through it without our Father in heaven. Please take care of yourself.
Carmen, don't give up. I am dealing with the same problem with my mom and it's devastating. Keep praying for strength and endurance. I saw commenters say to try magnesium and cbd oil. I am going to see if that helps my mom. You are not alone 🌷
Please check resources for respite care. You may be able to get a caregiver to come to your home for some part of the day to give you a break. Sometimes there are volunteers who can and will do this at no charge. Even with caregiving that is not memory related, caregivers MUST have breaks and rest to be able to continue this work of the heart! We cannot maintain our health and wellbeing with constant sleep deprivation. Senior services, church family, relatives and friends can be good resources.
I worked at the VA here in my state and we had a gentleman who stayed up literally for almost a week because he was in the throws of sundowners episode due to stage 4 dementia. He finally crashed and his daughter told us and the crew to let him sleep. We changed his brief while he slept and cleaned him and he never woke up once. He was so exhausted bis body was just ready to shut down. He also had a feeding tube which was very helpful in make sure he stayed hydrated and fed without getting him up. Sadly he passed away during one of these episodes. He just never woke up.
I appreciate all the information but what I find in many of these videos is the term loved one. I am a caregiver and although I care very much for my clients I think a different term may be used in these videos to accommodate everybody
I’ve noticed people with dementia either get agitated or withdrawn. I understand that the key to calm is to give them a Reasonable purpose. Whatever they did as a career or a love for a certain kind of recreation finding say an inanimate object to hold or carry. Providing opportunities to create in some way. Watercolor finger paint or clay modeling just to bake a few. In another case a woman who was a caregiver was given a doll to carry. It helped her to self soothe and made her behavior much easier to manage.
I find this presentation very helpful and to the point. I'm new at the caregiver business and need all the help I can get. I will seek out your talks in the future. Thank you
Unfortunately, nothing worked for my LO until the right mix of medications was achieved. Three calls to 911 with trips to the ER and 4 different medications later, he (and I) was finally free of sundowning and able to sleep again. During the period of sundowning, he would not let me do anything--read, write, watch tv, listen to music, nothing--except sit or stand with him. He didn't want to be touched/hugged. Once it lasted 36 hours. I had no idea what was happening, hence the struggle that turned into a mild altercation that prompted the 911 calls...sigh. He remembered everything, but said he couldn't control those urges, though he couldn't describe what the urges were. This disease is so scary!
When our family member, with dementia, started showing signs of sundowners and agitation at about 5 pm each night/after dinner. We started turning the tv on, to one of her favorite programs. The distraction helped her calm down and she will sit there quietly, contentedly crocheting until she’s ready to sleep. During the day we stay busy, just like she used to do when she was younger, so it’s familiar. The caregiving part is still a lot of work, but it was good to come up with a win/win solution. (We may have to change it all up in the future, as her dementia progresses, but for now this is a good “work-around”.)
...dealing with dementia. She sometimes gets me mixed up with Dad, who has passed on, and gets jealous of my attentions to my wife, daughters or daughter-in-laws. Or even friends. I get accused of being unfaithful, flirting or being too friendly like she would have done with Dad who never was any of the above except in her feelings of jealousy. She sometimes is physically affectionate, flirty or asks in the evening when we're going to bed. (She lives with us.) It's super uncomfortable for me but i try to deflect or try and remind her that I'm her son not her husband. Is this a normal characteristic of dementia patients and how is the best way to handle it. Her feelings are so real to her and you can tell it is painful to deal with the emotions she's having of jealousy and rejection......
My mom didn't get a good night's sleep for 7 years. I was in school but would make the trip to the other coast as often as I could so that she could at least run errands alone or take a nap. One thing that was interesting though was we would give my grandmother an ice cream cup around 3 in the afternoon and it would perk her up and give her some clarity. I think maybe the glucose going to her brain? Anyway, it seemed to help a bit temporarily and gave her some relief from the confusion even if for a few minutes.
Hi Darcie, I am glad to hear you and your mother were able to find something that helped your grandmother. Sometimes it takes that inside knowledge of your loved one to figure out what might work for them!
I cannot believe I found something that matches my search description of symptoms that appear at the end of the day. The symptoms closely match that my girlfriend exhibits. However, she is young (only 37) seems totally fine. So far I am the only ones that notice subtle personality changes, more aggressive uncontrolled body movements (ataxia like) , increased difficulty speaking, difficulty in thinking and also completely unaware that something is wrong. I have been unable to convince here something is wrong. It is driving me nuts. I just found out about this syndrome. I was always thrown off by the fact that I can determine when it will approximately come on. The first time I noticed it , I actually asked her if she was drunk and she said no. When it is really bad, she will sit there and when you aske her a question she will just look at you. I initially thought it could be either diabetes (her dad has it), gluten ataxia, Lupus, some kind of rare autoimmune response that attacks the brain, but nothing I found matched it exactly. The main two things it was either missing was ataxia or confusion and loss of cognitive ability. And the one thing that stood out, is that she was totally unaware of it. For Ataxia as far as I could tell everyone was aware they have ataxia. Even when she walks she cant walk in a straight line. She would walk like a drunk. It has been the most bizarre set of symptoms I have ever witnessed. She would walk down a corridor and bump into the walls, and when I point that out, there is no recognition of this. This sundowning syndrome really helps by grouping all the distinct symptoms I see happen to her. I found an article that also indicates circadian rhythm disruptions which make this much worse and I know she has major issue with sleep. So makes it more likely this diagnosis is more likely. But she only 37, can she already be getting dementia or alzheimers? or is there some other underlying cause that can also exhibit sundowners syndrome? This is killing me and I don't know what to do. We have fights about it and she says she doesn't want to go to the doctor and do endless test to find out nothing. I just need help with a diagnosis and figure out how to convince her of it.
We did manage to get an MRI done and it came up clear and an EEG and it also came up clear. But I think we need to do another EEG to catch it.@@BeckyKuan
I live with my grandmother and usually work all throughout the day. I come home and I'm usually up relatively late. She recently went on a Keto diet (not entirely sure it has any affect, but I've been told by some that lack of carbs may be an onset.) Anyway, she comes out dressed fully for church every morning and she seems aware that she can't go to church and she says she can't sleep. I don't know if it's her advanced age (81) but her rationale is very hard to follow sometimes. I try to get her to sit with me and relax, but the worst thing about it is her agitation. She's accused me of hiding and stealing things from even when I'm at work for 8+ hours a day. She's not so confused about her being awake, she's very aware... but she's just agitated. I somewhat feel like she's just bothered because I'm checking on her because the behavior is obviously ABNORMAL, but I'm just worried. There is a family history of Alzheimer's.
My mother like to color. Who knew! Thank you for being you. What a turn around for my mom. And, I write on a board about how her place is beautiful, the coloring is awesome which it is, and how she is in a safe place. She seems to like that!
I need to ask a question regarding my husband who is bedridden and has Alzheimer’s. How do I do it. Where do I find the area to ask questions. Thanks for your help.
I find that my husband has more looping in the winter when there is less sunshine. He seems to always return to a happy place. He loved his job as a head caretaker in the school system, so his loop involves meeting with the supervisor, checking on supplies, staff etc. The loops that only last a few hours are much easier than those that last days. This is a learning experience for sure. And each day is different. My husband is no longer at home, but in long term care.
Hi , is your husband still with you? My husband was diagnosed 3 years ago and is still doing ok. He is in mild to moderate stage. He cannot drive, has trouble dressing and eating, but can still carry on a conversation pretty good.
@@lifecontent6525 No I am afraid that right after my comment he was diagnosed with kidney failure and passed away 6 months ago. A blessing in disguise I guess. Peace be with you in your journey.
I think of the sundowner phenomena like a gas tank When you are young, you have a huge gas tank and seldom need to re-fill it with sleep As you age, your gas tank gets smaller and smaller so you have less reserve capacity The person with dementia has several problems First they operate with A very small tank, and that already small tank is more rapidly drained trying to cope with any stress And maybe poor sleep means the tank is not even filled at night these factors combine to put the person at constant risk of depleted reserves And therefore being unable to cope
I love this analogy, Ardy. You sound like a wonderful, caring, super informed caregiver! I think so many others could get value by the way you take a difficult topic and describe it in such a relatable way. Thank you for sharing and if you ever want to be featured on one of my videos, let me know. I think you have a lot to offer.
Natali. I've been following this channel for some time but just now subscribed. (And that despite your incorrect pronunciation of the word 'button'. ) Your videos have been a help to me in this journey so far. Just do not think there is enough solid information regarding dementia. Oddly, aside from these videos, my biggest help has come from other caregivers and family members affected by loved ones with dementia. Thank you for what you do. Come home soon and safely. Via con Dios.
One tip I would add is that if possible caregiver should sleep when the loved one sleeps. I realize that's not always possible, but sleeping during the day with your loved one will help when you have to stay up all night watching them.
I read comments it males me sad i don't want to had "VD" but i do sundowning is terrible and i have lost a little more volume but Doctor is making me a appt to see brain Doc. I tell u it lonely i understand can explain some. When u r on da inside of sundowning its hell glad there is help for ur love ones. I finally after all the years i told my church family. But my natural family in my mind i say they don't understand but in my heart its very sad do they care. Saying this is so very sad. Im tried. I pray aways for ppl like me and thank God these words can correct themself. I try and tell my hubby we getting older. and my Dementia gets worster. No one wants to listen or try to understand my plight. Thanks you guys. Dementia ppl can be in a crowded room but still alone and so very very sad we can't help our selvers at a certain point. I have been hitting mostly missing. I can't enjoy life like i use to. I get scare about different things alot. Thank u 4 reading this
My farther inlaw before his stroke he had loss of hearing and generative eye sight so he's going blind and its robbed his hearing, He did have early onset dementia and now he has temper tantrums and sulks, if you tell him off because he's done something wrong or he goes outside in his pyjamas he really sulks and he's falling down a couple of times and you have to watch him 24 hours a day! We have had to put locks on all of the food cupboards as he will eat half a cake or cheese and then there's not enough for everyone else. He can't see to make himself a cup of tea anymore, ive worked in residential care homes so I have insight on how to use sign language! At night he's up at least 9 times and thinks its day time and gets dressed and we have to put his pyjamas back on him! My mother inlaw was closed to having a heart attack a couple of weeks ago! Bryan keeps trying to push her out of the bed and he can be very aggressive. Ive told her that her and my brother inlaw need to accept help. as something has to give and i dont want her to have a break down. Ive talked to her about talking to his doctor and getting him some medication to calm him down and getting him sleeping tablets so that he doesn't wander especially at night! I also think that he has sundown problems, and I think because Ellie deaf she has the TV up loud which could cause Bryan to get agitated.
Sometimes it is not just the sundowner person...but often times IN ASSUSTED LIVING ALZHEIMERS UNIT the sundowner person goes into a NON SUNDOWNERS ROOM...which can be very alarming...esp at night. Eventually..we had to ask the facility if we could have a lock on my mom's room. All workers had the code to get inside my mom's room. When my mom was Not in her wheelchair she could leave the room on her own. The aides would simply put in the code when she wanted to go back to her room. This lock was tremendous peace of mind...and we knew she would not be disturbed during the day or in the evenings. Hope this helps.
my husband is positively terrifing to be around. He wanders outside and leaves doors open. He NEVER gets a good nights sleep. He threatens and throws things, screaming and cussing me. He won't allow a schedule. "im not a child" screamed right now when he left the front door open. I got rid of his guns, now hiding kitchen knives....if he can find the keys, he takes off and police have had to find him. I'm getting sick and can't stay up 24/7 to watch him.... I went through this for 12years with his mother and now I have to deal with it again with my husband.
I purchased a special clock for my mother in law that is larger and easy to read. This digital clock includes not only the time of day, the date and day it is but also what part of the day it is. Meaning, the clock will show wherher it is afternoon, evening, morning, etc. I got it on Amazon and it has helped alot although she still forgets to look at it from time to time and still gets confused about what time it is and gets up in the middle of the night sometimes. However, we still find it helpful depending upon how far along your loved one is with this disease. Hope this helps.
I agree your loved one should not be exposed to television shows where there is violent activity. It’s very disturbing to my loved one who shares this syndrome. When your loved one gets agitated and upset just leave the room. I find my loved one does not like to be alone so if I leave the room and disengage my loved one quiets down. Make sure your loved one has a strict schedule of waking, eating and sleeping. They need a tight schedule and will adhere to one. Have your loved one keep a diary so he or she can be assured he or she took his or her medicine and had his or her meals.
My husband with LewyBody & Alzheimer’s has SUDDENLY become violent & combative to the point where we put him in a memory unit. He has continued this behavior there, hitting staff & other patients. He recently fell & hit his head so they sent him to the ER. He has continued this behavior there & is now so anxious that he can’t sit still. They have put him into restraints because he won’t stay in bed. Is this SUDDEN change in behavior normal? I’m at my wits end.
As long as any physical reason has been ruled out, infection, pain etc then yes, dementia can do a step change, rather than a slow decline. Different symptoms can then suddenly appear. Different dementias are more prone to violence e.g frontal temporal lobe dementia.
I’ve notice d for a few year that they both seem very tired/sleepy. Dad always went bed early 7 for many years now but mum up till 2- years ago used to love being up late as long as I can remember. 11- midnight. When I went to see them in October both were in bed at 6:30 7. And always early risers 5 AM remain in bed 7:30 Am to 8:30 AM. And yes afternoons are bad moods they argue. That tv is on the highest possible volume and they still can’t hear. They scream at the people on tv...... Thank you for great information. I’m finally understanding. Do they realize? I feel like I could have removed my head and placed it on the table and that would not even spark any normal reaction. I don’t know who their doctors are but keep telling them they need check ups and I’ll drive out and take but No.
Hey I'm really loving this, I just found your page and vids, Ive been a na/cna for over twenty years and now I also do ma1/l1ma work and I love your advise and suggestion on all this . I get your specificly talking to one on one caregivers and u are doing a great job! Thank u!!! But you have also given me ideas to try just gotta adjust it to more than one lol. The lighting thing , I never thought of it that way. But it does make since
Taking care of my LO is affecting my home life. I avoid family/social activities due to the care required. I'm concerned with bringing in additional help who will not be familiar to my LO.
Geez, I feel like I get this. Seriously!!! But I'm here because I am my mom's caregiver. She's really good during the day but she gets more "troublesome" in the evening. Dinnertime ends in drama and bad vibes more and more. I try so hard, but I am not perfect. I have my own health issues and it's a nightmare. I feel so alone. I'm becoming more and more depressed.
Its really hard and its not for everybody. I had to get my grandmother in a home as it was too much for me. On the other hand I was able to care for my mom. There are a lot of variable factors. If its too hard and taking a toll on you then you may need to find an alternative solution. There's no shame in saving yourself. You would be doing both of you a favor whatever way you decide to go.
There is no guilt if it is time for your loved one to transfer to a memory care facility. You are lovingly providing him/her with a safe place as you cannot be on duty 24 hours a day.
I remember when I went to STNA training, they used the term “therapeutic fibbing”. At first I struggled with this once I became a LPN I learned the value of it. To the woman that was worried where her husband was....she hadn’t remembered he died. I would say he had a little trouble with the car so he is at the garage working on it. To the woman that remembers she had a disabled daughter. And she was fearful she lost her, I would have to tell her the daughter was fine with her dad. Reassuring positive things to help them get through the fear.
I really struggled with this too. I worried that if I went along with Dad's 'stories' in order to humour him, that some part of his brain would be aware that I was lying, and that he would subconsciously know that I couldn't be trusted. I remember discussing this with a young colleague of mine in his late 20s whose Mum also had dementia. He told me not to beat myself up about this because the dementia patient forgets the interaction anyway. At the end of the day, if it calms and comforts your loved one, it can only be a positive thing.
These care giving nostrums - while admirable / well intentioned - to me highlight how little progress has been made in understanding/treating such a debilitating and widespread disease. As part of the human condition we strive to familiarize and cope with even most drastic and hurtful conditions. Across this country - by the thousands - we cannot but accept the regression of our most loved into shadows of themselves - with worse yet to come. With the ' wars ' on other heartbreaking diseases are we too accommodating when in comes to accepting the dire straits of dementia? 'worn down' may be apt but can we hope for clinical help.
Don’t give up looking to the natural realm. I am convinced that the sunlight we get helps regulate many things in all of us. I’m excited to try some red light therapy on my 90 year old mom! I’m hopeful.
When someone nearing age 50 while working in a trade who consumes alchohol more often on their days off when getting less sunlight and less exercise during the morning hours while behaving more often in that sundowning pattern described it could be signs and symptoms of early onset Dementia being caused by both occupational health hazards while self medicating with Alcohol.
My loved one came running into my room and yelled that the dog was having an epileptic episode. (He's never even had epilepsy) I wake up and run so fast to see whats up with the dog. When I see him, he looks confused but awake and safe n sound. Like he just woke up, so I then knew that he was just having a strong dream and my loved one thought the worst. The anxiety and tears in her face was so real. I felt bad for her :( feel bad everyday but I don't show her
As the son of a mother recently diagnosed with Dementia/ Sun Downers ( she's 88 and in assisted living) I'm grateful for the info, thank you Dr Edmonds. BTW are you related to Andrew and Beth Edmonds?
I am dealing with this on the daily, my dad sleeps best from 8amish until 2-3 in the afternoon....he is completely immobile so he has no choice but to sit around, music helps a lot but he naturally naps all day...he wakes up at night and talks mostly gibberish....I sleep in his room because he is full assist and incontinent.....so we just stay up and watch tv together or watch music videos or what ever seems to make him happy.....I sleep when he sleeps but generally try to be up by noon to get some me time before his day begins....its a wacky schedule by most standards but I find it takes entirely too much effort to get him to stay on any regular schedule....and I am too exhausted to give up my little sleep trying.....I just nod and go along with his ranting, or distract him by asking questions to get his mind going in a different direction....get out magazines he can look at and tear up if he wants lol.....he always thinks he's on some job or something and he is very fidgety...he folds hand kerchiefs, unties knots, anything to keep him busy with his hands....and yes the tv can be aggitating if there is anything jarring or panicky going on.....I have to watch soothing things.....he loves westerns but those are limited to his early waking hours.
Beautiful tips but it’s hard to do some of them when going to a house where we cannot make changes, as a caregiver thank you anyway I will try to do some of them.
My dad wakes up every 2-3 hours wanting to go pee from 11pm till 5:30am. I'm a zombie most days. He sleeps most of the day. I try to structure him, but there is nothing he has to do. He only worked and drank in his life so he has zero hobbies and the only card game he enjoys is a group game and hardly anyone plays it. Anymore he just wants to lay in bed and sleep. And everytime I leave the room, he calls me back for something stupid.
