Hello you beauties. Access all episodes 10 hours earlier than RU-vid by Subscribing on Spotify - spoti.fi/2LSimPn or Apple Podcasts - apple.co/2MNqIgw. Here’s the timestamps: 00:00 The Biggest Winners & Losers of the Sexual Revolution 03:07 Did the Pill Increase Abortions? 06:56 Would the Sexual Revolution Happen Without the Pill? 12:55 Did the Sexual Revolution Fail Children? 17:18 Feminism Is Failing Women 24:36 Why Young Girls Are Struggling 29:43 Advice to People Who Think Kids Are Restrictive 35:09 Interacting with the Other Sex in a Non-Sexual Way 40:02 Can Men & Women Work Together to Find a Better Way? 45:43 Society’s Disdain for Sexual Morality 50:29 How the Sexual Revolution Relates to Identity Politics 56:16 People Are Struggling & Need Sympathy 1:07:16 Where to Find Mary
Absolutely. And Mary too, I've been reading her for years now. Chris, thanks so much for using your platform in the interest of consciousness & communication. 🙏👍🤩
This women is completely disingenuous. Tupac’s and Eminem’s most popular songs about parents were songs about their dysfunctional mothers. You can actually see Tupac going through “red pill rage” throughout his music career. Tupac didn’t even find out who his biological father was until after he made Papa’z Song. His mother had him mad over a man who wasn’t even his father. She also had children by multiple guys.
I am 59 years old and I grew up at the onset of the women's movement - my mother pushed it on me like nobody's business. It ruined my life. It ruined my experience as a mother. It deeply adversely impacted my children who are still suffering as adults from the brokenness of our family throughout their entire childhood. Today, I hear young women joking about "Plan B" after a rough night out - the abortion pill is now referred to as "birth control" or "women's health care". That's how low the bar is today.
I'm a 60 yr old woman and thankful for feminism. It provided options in life, more options that my mother and grandmother had. I wasn't pushed into it at all, but went willingly.
We definitely got many more options, but it came at a cost. Telling women that we can have it all, without uttering a word about what would be sacrificed, has really hit hard what used to be a nuclear family.
Feminism was really about almost doubling the tax base and consumer base. It also gets children into state institutions early in life for indoctrination. Parents who are both working are also more tired , stressed and distracted and therefore more compliant to state and corporate agendas and messaging.
Thank u. All these smooth brains blaming each other. Couldnt possibly have been an agenda driving this. Thats why its screwed the ppl cant fix it unless they know whats broken
Very true, sadly to speak the truth in modern society is equal to an act of revolution. The mob would rather see you dead than to accept the help that you are trying to give them.
The woman who was the editor of cosmo for decades, wrote a book about how they pushed these ideas onto women in the 70s in order to sell more products. They wrote articles about fabulous single women living and working in big cities. The problem is these women they wrote articles about didn't actually exist. They were making up people in order to push the products being sold by their advertisers. We started a revolution so companies can sell us more makeup.
Chris is always polite, informed and well able to ask the deepest questions in the fewest words. Then he takes the answers, no interruptions . And builds again. Excellent example to watch.
The point made at 35:45 is absolutely spot on. When I’m with my friends or band mates I hardly feel the need to look at social media. I can go hours without looking at my phone. When I’m bored or lonely I can’t put it down. I have to make a conscious decision to set it down and look around from time to time.
I can’t believe actions have consequences! If only history didn’t start 50 years ago we could’ve had thousands of years of philosophy and wisdom to look to.
Marriage benefitted the women, not the other way around. Instead of a husband they now have a boss that would get rid of her if it meant more profits by downsizing.
Can't believe what I'm reading... How dare you apply well thought out sound logic to prove your valid point. It's 2023 bro. Down is now identified as up and up is now identified as Down. My orientation my choice...
Throughout "History" (I'm using the term in its strict form), women have been sexually reticent based generally, on consequences for them. Men, to the extent that they were sexually reticent, or moral, acted throughout most of our history, on principle alone. Until recently men could walk away from the consequences of indiscriminate sexual behavior, whereas women were stuck with the kids. For most of human evolution we didn't even know that sex made babies. Then at some point we found out.
@@MJLUCEY-sd1mq "For most of human evolution we didn't even know that sex made babies. Then at some point we found out." This can't possibly make sense.
Thomas Sowell has a few things to add to this women's thesis. Welfare has reduced our dependency on our families and made us more dependant on the state as our "daddy".
Wherein, political party machines become controllers of the welfare recipients. In that scenario, voting becomes a transaction, and democracy becomes a commercial activity not an attempt to achieve competent government.
I have listened to a lot of Chris's podcasts, and enjoyed almost every one, but I have to say that this woman interviewed is simply beyond brilliant and massively knowledgeable. This session needs to be seen in every high school health or college psych 101 class.
@@kathleenking47which means people who grew up with whole spectrum and of the revolution. People who were born and were kids when it began and then were in their 20-30 and wrote songs about it
In 1976, girls in my Boston elementary school wore t-shirts that said: Anything a boy can do, a girl can do better. And, this was the feminist mantra at the time. I remember female teachers prioritizing girls over boys. ( Even though as a boy I could clearly see that I was stronger and faster at the 20 yard dash than any girl ) I had no father to talk to about this, divorced. My mother told me it was true about the shirt... Everything in America is BS... I learned that fact back in 76 @ 10 years old. Horrible to confuse little boy at that age. Garbage liberal society
@@Foxie770 Like many men Gen X, I never got married and I have no children. Women were to busy chasing a career in the 80s and 90s.. And, by the time the 00s came around I was ok with dating snd working on my own career. At, 58... Im loaded and childless and have a long term gf.
Spot on. Women have been saying they are better than men since forever. When I was 15 there was a campaign in the UK against sexual assault on women. All fine or so you might think. The tagline was "all men are rapists". I asked my mum about it. Apparently, "all men are potential rapists". How helpful. I saw recently women in Australia running a campaign "men are the problem". It grows tiring after a while. A constant assault on men, on and on without end. I still treat women as individuals regardless, but I am not wasting time on the many that think poorly of "men" as opposed to specific individuals, or those women who believe feminism has anything more to offer than man-hating.
almost seems like the sex rev was done on purpose to break down family values and stop healthy family's reproducing but of course that couldnt be the truth because no1 in the world wants to stop people reproducing why would they, they promote gay people to have children its not like anyone who might have had a healthy family but instead found them self to become trans by becoming a hero trans-man/women or women and not reproducing
Well if one thinks a make female monogomous relationship is critical to social cohesion and continuing as healthy. Its been obvious but ppl don't want to hear that aren't conservative. Most ppl enjoyed the freedom of no committment se>
I was a teen girl in the 80s. I felt a lot of pressure to have a career because having a family and being a housewife was frowned on (at least where I was). I think this has had an impact also. I remember guys at school saying things about women needing to contribute financially equally and that they were not interested in women who wanted to be stay at home moms.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 Well honestly, if I made enough money to pay all the bills and have money to spend and save I would be ok with my wife staying at home if that's what she wanted as long as she took care of the home duties but life is too expensive for one person only working if we want a comfortable life. I don't make $150,000 .
@@wyleecoyotee4252 if anyone is working .. who is raising the kids? I gave up working outside of the home once I had children. There is no way I could put as much as I do into my children and home as I do now if I work a full time job. Our children deserve more .
Women working means twice the number of people for jobs (at least jobs women are willing to take). That lowers pressure on wages. Same with low skilled labor when massive immigration is allowed. Add divorce and two family residencies and you have more housing pressure and drives up prices. It is just natural outcomes of choices. Not saying it is good or bad but something which needs to be known and discussed.
@@wyleecoyotee4252Double the workers means more people wanting the jobs which lowers the wage pressure. More divorces and more single people means more pressure on housing which raises the price. One of the main reasons that families seem to have lost buying power (besides inflation).
Loved this discussion. Thank you. I noticed a previous comment from a fellow 80’s teen and I graduated from high school in ‘89. I too experienced pressure to have a career “equal” to my future marriage partner. I knew that meant equal earning power, yet my own personal experience was that my Mother was the bread earner and my Father stayed home with “the kids”, so I didn’t buy into the idea that it had to be one particular way. When you begin to realize we were created to complement one another rather than compete, you begin to question everything you were taught in school and society in general. Where are the narratives, music, culture that show us HOW, WHEN or the PROCESS of change when living life? We only highlight the very top and very bottom of people’s lives, but disregard the important choices that carried them to the top or bottom. If we could all grasp the whole picture of a single lifetime, we can also grasp an honest mistake from the past regarding the grand new invention of birth control and how it lead to sad destinations we never imagined. Human beings make sense of life through stories and we also need other people. I have noticed (without scientific studies), that those people in my life who focus upon autonomy are less happy than those that focus upon connections. It was that simple for me. I didn’t understand change when I was young, but I understood happiness and followed the people in my life I saw living happily and that meant living for LONG TERM stability mixed with some please and fun in between. 33 years of a marriage and two healthy thriving adult children who lead other young kids has made me realize that you can do better than you think by simply watching models of other people who live healthy, emotionally robust lives. I am a god-mother too of two teen boys that are only children and one doesn’t have a father in his life. We attend every event we can. We witness things for these kids and tell them they are loved and that they have other sources of support than just their parents so that they know connection is present. We have fun with them. Enjoy their stage of life. Include them. This is what life is. A big circle. Don’t “opt out” of it.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 Depression, drug addiction, alcoholism, objectification, self-deletion rates has never been higher than they are now. Yet people has never been as single as they are now, there is barely any marriage anymore. You are lying to yourself.
I am a boomer and the oldest of three boys. Our father REQUIRED that we introduce ourselves to any girl's parents and ask them for permission before we took them out. It was a HUGE advantage.
Made sense in a time wherein father's were highly respected by their wives and daughters. And unmarried young women were expected to be Virgins before marriage.
If someone asked my parents permission to marry me I would dump them, wtf is wrong with you people😂 You are marrying me, the opinion that matters is mine, if you can't even make something like this about us two you don't even respect me And also, how about situations where the father is an asshole or even just dumb😂
@@randomusername3873 I'll assume your living in the west or some westernized country. Do bare in mind that before the era of women having the right to chose who they marry. Women were under the protection and provision of their fathers. Hence the need for asking the father's approval. And in some conservative cultures. It's a suitor's way of expressing respect to the family who raised the woman. Specially when marriage isn't just the union of two individuals. It is also the union of two families, two communities. And yes , unfortunately their are father's who have questionable characters. Fortunately, that's not the case for a majority of father's.
@@randomusername3873 I didn't say anything about marriage nor did I mention any father other than my own. I was referring to dating when we were both minors and introducing myself to BOTH parents and giving them the confidence that I would be responsible. It was a sign of respect for the family that I could be trusted to responsibly spend time alone with her. I grew up in a small town where every girl I knew in high school also knew my family. My father passed away years ago, but he was very honorable man and a veteran.
I spent two decades chasing very leftist "feminist" women. Nothing ever worked out. It only led to heartbreak and degradation of my own mental health and prosperity. I'm so glad these conversations are being had. This is stuff all culture needs to pay attention to.
@@sarahrobertson634No, that is not a/his problem. His chasing is natural as a man. I, as a woman, in change, feel out of place if I am the chaser. It’s not natural. And being a woman, probably was the reason why you felt the need to advice against. I say chase away, Andy.
@@sarahrobertson634Chris has mentioned in the past that he’s been chased a couple times in his entire life. He’s been on TV for his looks. His jobs have been around nightclubs. It didn’t get better than that… If men don’t chase, they stay alone. You are a woman. You have no understanding of this issue because you are single by choice. Men don’t have that option.
@@amaraci I like your advice. It will lead to further degradation of his mental health. If he stops chasing women and learns to be self sufficient, then all that attention will be removed from girls like you. And you can't have that, can you Ally? But for Andy's own good, he needs to stop chasing and learn to be at peace with himself. This is about him, not you.
It makes me so grateful to have grown up in a functional family with loving parents who were devoted to each other, plus lots of aunts and uncles and cousins to grow up with. I was such a great feeling to know that apart from your parents, there were all these other uncles and aunts who would always love you and take care of you if something terrible happened. I feel so sad for those who never had this type of experience growing up. Probably the most precious memory of my childhood was hearing my parents’ voices gently speaking to each other in the other room as I fell asleep. It was the most beautiful lullaby in the world.
Sounds idyllic. I envy you. Because I did not have that, I tried to give the same thing to my children. They are such well rounded high achievers. The "sacrifices" I made by not working while raising children were the best thing that ever happened. This said, I have to point out that I had the support of a loving partner who could support us both monetarily and emotionally. Lucky me!
Same! Family is such an important blessing. ❤ may complicate things but it forces human interaction every day across gender, age groups, everything is just in a better perspective
"Sexual revolution led to disconnected relationships. Unplanned pregnancies bred resentment. Fatherless kids grew up with anger. Some thrived, focused on education. Others sought stability, shunning marriage. Result: broken families, loveless upbringing. Now, they struggle with intimacy."
In history, 'unplanned' pregnancies where rampant. Girls who also where chased down, trick her into sex. Men as we all know by know want sex and do many things to get it. History is full of this, up to this day, with rampant consequenses for the girl, woman, young and older in all cultures. Girls where better protected, than now from males. Now, girls, women are thrown to the lions every day and nobody cares. The ones who care and want to protect them have it really hard this days.
These episodes always do 2 things for me: Reaffirm life choices I just made instinctively, but that were always questioned by other people. Make me realise how fortunate I was having the parents and upbringing I had as a kid. I feel quite a bit of a disconnect with a lot of the problems people of my age struggle with (millennials) and I'm pretty sure having a secure loving relationship, as well as a positive example of masculinity and femininity modelled to me in my formative years is at the core of that. Which makes me think if we could gift that to the majority of children, we would stand a much better chance at avoiding many of the pitfalls that await them too.
None of that is actually true. The problems of young people in particular in the US are do to social chaos, not issues with parenting. As they say about divorce, there are no 'bad' divorces. Any couple in a divorce should not be married. Particularly with kids. And of course many people just have bizarre notions of 'feminity' and 'masculinity'. In too many marriages what this means is "the man should be in charge". Women now in marriages are earning MORE than their husbands. So much for 'bringing home the bacon'. What aspect of 'masculinity' are you referring to if not that? Mothers most definitely have as many of those attributes, in fact from my personal experience its women IN marriages who are much more dogmatic than divorced mothers.
AMEN‼️ If you are a millennial, you are truly blessed indeed. And technically considered “counter culture”. Bravo! I wish you all the best with your family.🙏🏽❤️
@@mikearchibald-u6g to be clear, when I say I had a positive representation of masculinity I mean he set the bar what a good man is. The same goes for femininity with my mum. That has nothing to do with gender roles or who earns what. My parents both worked, my Mum actually worked nights so she could be there for us in a morning and after school. They both made sacrifices and I'm sure times weren't always easy but they always put us first. They were childhood sweethearts and celebrated their Ruby wedding this year. That's what I was getting at, they made each other better. I didn't grow up with a single Mum that resented men and imposed that adversarial narrative like some of my friends.
@@tempsoda I had no problem til your last paragraph. I know MANY single women and they are VERY far from 'resenting men'. Women are far better at isolating singularities than men, who tend to 'blanket statement' practically everything. But it kind of sounds like there was very little difference in what made a 'good man' and a 'good woman'. Being good 'people' goes a long way. Like your mother mine worked, and worked hard, and worked harder when my dad got laid off. My dad set a good example of a 'good man' as he had no problem when laid off in doing dishes, laundry, all the 'womens work', in fact he had no problem doing those things and getting us too. That had nothing to do with being a good 'man', in fact like me he had a temper, and that 'masculinity' was actually a POOR example of manliness as his short temper made us fearful of him. He didn't beat us except spankings, but he would run the water for dishes VERY hot and tell us to 'toughen up' to wash dishes, which today would be abusive. So the 'manly' part was actually a poor example, where he set the example of being a 'good man' was when he got away from the masculinity and for lack of a better phrase, accepted his feminine side and did housework when needed. And like I said, in europe they have as many single women and divorces, what they DON"T have is americas dog eat dog society where if you DO need out of a relationship, it doesn't mean certain poverty and unavailability to your children.
Good post. Unmentioned truth is that non-predatory men are literally worse at the current dating market than predatory men. A regular guy will try the whole romantic route over and over again, but then get beat by some random player who fucks and leaves.
You can end up in a situation where your perceived value is average at best and end up in a sexless life, being rejected by women who want higher value men.
@@maladyofdeathAs the player, I suppose. There is* no way a regular guy trying the courting thing will not eventually succeed and find his one. I refuse to believe we live in such a sad world if that’s the case…
@@amaraci >There os no way a regular guy trying the courting thing will not eventually succeed and find his one. well, I hate to break it to you, but that's not the case. it is in fact a sad world we live in.
Yep. Yep. At first I didn't like Mr. Eberstadt was an out of touch boomer, but the more I understood his talking points shifted my perception of him to Nicholas Gigachad Eberstadt.
I LOVE the way Mary talks without demonizing anyone, just explaining things. It's very refreshing and keeps one engaged in the best way possible. Thank you for this.
@@ShielaM-p1wno they are not ‘insane’. I don’t think Mary demonised anyone other than predatory men. She just talked factually about the unexpected, and wide reaching, negative consequences of the sexual revolution. It’d be interesting if you could provide quotes of her demonising people
@@ohraisins I would very much like to understand what you mean by "not demonizing anyone." Because some...ill call them people...need, NEED to be demonized. Despicable monsters. Like the first feminists. Who were witches. And terrorist bombers. But people agree with ALL of their ideas??? That makes no sense to me. So, i read your OP and interpreted it as to mean that you would rather hear incomplete, nice-sounding truth, over the entire ugly truth that includes the criminals responsible for the misery that is present. Is this a correct interpretation?
9:27 As a music and civics teacher in middle school I am immensely grateful for this commentary about the historical, cultural and sociological meaning of the narrative told in the popular music of the 90s which reflects the net negative damaging effects of the sexual revolution on families, how people relate to each other and their turn to the pursuit of material aspects of life away from relationships.
The only problem with that rationale is that the issues said pop music sang about existed pre-sexual liberation.🤷🏾♂️ It's one thing to say the liberation exacerbated the issues, but to put all the issues on sexual liberation is illogically blaming one factor in a multifaceted problem.
*@bertramblik8826* Why specifically "the 90s"? And I'm asking you, Ms Eberstadt, and others. I was born in 1973. Divorce rates started going up when divorce became easier in the 70s. The music from Eminem and Tupac mentioned is reflective of high divorce rates. *THE BIG QUESTION IS:* Do we really want to go back to essentially _forcing_ people to stay married as it was before the 70s?
@@miyojewoltsnasonth2159It's not clear that making it difficult to divorce is a bad thing. First, people who endure are often better off than people who divorce. Secondly, it makes it far less risky for a woman to devote herself to home and family, and less necessary to make the world more like a home by increasing the reach and power of govt.
Fun fact, many european countries have a much higher divorce rate than the US, with NONE of the social ill effects. I know the US educational system is not known for its rigour but I'll leave that to readers to figure out.
00:00 🏛️ The sexual revolution had winners and losers. Men, especially predatory ones, were the biggest winners, while non-predatory men, women, and children were the biggest losers. 03:19 🚫 Contraception doesn't reduce abortion; it changes intentionality. It shifts responsibility for pregnancy to women, making it seen as their "failure" if it occurs. 07:11 👨👩👧👦 Contraception's widespread adoption led to a decline in traditional family structures and increased single-parent households, primarily fatherless homes. 08:37 🎉 The sexual revolution, ignited by the birth control pill, destigmatized non-marital sex, leading to a cultural shift in attitudes towards sexuality. 10:54 🎤 Popular culture, particularly music, reflects the negative impact of the post-revolutionary era on children's well-being and relationships with absent fathers. 14:33 🔄 Divorce rates surged after the sexual revolution, stabilizing later due to a shift towards cohabitation and a decrease in marriage rates. 16:19 🗣️ Discussing the sexual revolution and its consequences has been met with resistance, akin to a wild party that's gotten out of control. 17:57 🌟 The sexual revolution aimed for immediate gratification but has overlooked long-term happiness and the complexities of human relationships. 20:11 ⚖️ The sexual revolution led to a reduction in standards for both men and women, potentially hindering meaningful, committed relationships. 24:20 📱 Social media exacerbates the sense of isolation and psychological fragility, but theroot cause lies in the "human subtraction" caused by the sexual revolution. 27:55 🧵 The reduction in social knowledge is a root issue, influenced by factors like helicopter parenting and a shift to a brain-based economy. 28:47 🍼 The Sexual Revolution has led to a deficit in basic social knowledge, illustrated by an example of young mothers lacking experience in caring for babies. 31:51 📊 Since the Sexual Revolution, both men and women's happiness has decreased, with women now reporting lower average happiness levels than men. 33:14 🚬 Reliable contraception increased short-term pleasure but made long-term fulfillment more elusive, creating a paradox. 34:51 🐘 We recognize the social needs of other species but fail to acknowledge similar needs in humans, conducting a radical experiment on human relationships. 36:34 👨👩👦 Extended family and multi-generational settings historically provided low-stakes communication and learning about the opposite sex, a valuable aspect of social development. 39:59 🚭 The analogy of tobacco smoking suggests that societal perspectives can change over time based on accumulated evidence, potentially indicating a shift in attitudes toward aspects of the Sexual Revolution. 42:44 💔 The unintended consequences of the Sexual Revolution are surfacing, challenging the assumptions made during its initiation, highlighting the need for nuanced discussions on relationships and fulfillment. 46:12 🔄 The emphasis on sex positivity and destigmatization of various sexual behaviors may be indicative of a deeper societal disconnection, particularly in terms of understanding the true essence of human connection and fulfillment. 47:55 🗣️ The rise of identity politics can be linked to the erosion of traditional family structures, leading individuals to seek alternative forms of belonging and protection. 54:30 💡 Identity politics can lead to absolutist views about different groups, hindering understanding and dialogue. 55:12 🔄 Confusion around gender and identity can be linked to a lack of social knowledge, particularly in fatherless homes. 57:10 🌪️ The rapid technological changes have created a sense of loss and confusion, especially for younger generations. 59:01 📱 There's hope for better strategies to manage screen time and social media for kids in the future. 01:00:21 💊 The opioid epidemic and drug-related deaths are indicative of a deeper societal issue, possibly linked to a sense of unfulfillment. 01:02:57 😔 The implosion of the family structure has left many elderly individuals profoundly lonely and disconnected. 01:04:15 🤝 Empathy is crucial in understanding and addressing the suffering caused by societal shifts, even if the causes are not always immediately obvious. 01:05:36 🔄 Finding a language that acknowledges suffering and encourages redemption is essential for societal progress. 01:06:50 🔄 The severity of cancel culture and identity politics may lead to a reevaluation and a more reasonable conversation in the future.
Only women won, they just don't like what they knew would be won. They were warned by anti suffergettes about 1900. Men, nationally lost. Rootless wealthy won.
Been listening to Mrs Eberstaft for years; she is brilliant. A very resilient person, she’s been saying these things for years. Hopefully young men and women will read and listen to her and others, and see the light, before it’s too late! Great interview!
*Imagine you're a man.* You're a man who has made something of himself. You're a man who is physically attractive to women. Your innate mating strategy is sexual variety. But even if you don't care about sexual variety, you can still see the divorce rates, how women initiage 75% of them, and how the divorce courts are biased against men. Basically, you have a lot to lose in a divorce. When women are readily available to you, willing to have casual sex, willing to settle for relationships with no commitment from the man. Then what incentive do those men have to get married? The men who are the most desirable to women, have the least amount of incentive to get married. The men who are the most willing to get married, are the men who are the least desirable, and women don't want those men. This problem will only continue to get worse, unfortunately.
Why do you need an incentive to settle down? We have always been able to have sex with any man but we controlled ourselves and marriage is still a goal for many. Do men not have that capability?
Or at least, not to marry Western women. I fled the US 10 years ago, lived in Europe for a bit, and now recently married a lovely lady in Colombia. Men, you have options. Use them.
@@jarenfromvenus because at some point the woman will decide to go for another guy so she'll divorce and take EVERYTHING from the man leaving him often on the streets because she wanted Chad's celery...marriage brings absolutely nothing to a man other than hoping it makes the woman happy and on top of that its literally is a huge gamble on his future...a damocles sword hanging over his head at all times because the second she decides to leave him, his life is over
Well, first off, the divorce rate according to the us census is only 30%. Second, the number one reason women file for divorce is because their husbands act like children and the sexual desire goes away. This has been shown in a few studies. So my advice to this hypothetical man would be to act like a man and dont treat your wife like she is your mom, and you shouldn't have to worry about her filimg for divorce.
@@friedrichdergroe9664 Literally both sexes have options. In and out of this country. Yall making a regular part of life (finding a mate) into a call of duty mission and it’s bizarre. You all need treats promised to you control yourselves like children and you think that's normal. You weren't able to connect to a single person out of over 100 MILLION options? It's getting weird.
When I was growing up women were extremely proud of being mothers and raising children.Women today, know something is missing but they absolutely refuse to admit it's loss of family.
Mary comes across as an absolute intellectual powerhouse, holy shit. She speaks so carefully. Like he's had a lifetime of being misinterpreted and has evolved beyond it
She is such a boomer Professor archetype ready to destroy 12 phd students over one office hour. You can sense the voltage in the specificity of her word choice.
speaks how someone even slightly familiar with intellectual integrity speaks. My colloquial. The fact the 99% is lacking does not make her anything but sufficient. Unfortunately she fails the other requirements of integrity in her claims so, 99% she is.
@@michealcherrington6531 Its great to have good fundamentals in speech. Its not so great to be insecure enough that you need to point out in a RU-vid comment section that you're just as much a person of intellect as the person featured in a podcast. Start your own channel and show us the prowess of your colloquial language. If what you say is true, maybe I'll agree with you on your own channel.
When I hear any new theory of any kind I always ask “How will this affect children?” The healthiest, most stable societies are those that put the wellbeing of children, especially the youngest and most vulnerable, at the center. What is barely ever discussed is how much of what is called “social conservatism”: traditional marriage and family gives the statistically best outcome for kids. Children have been thrown to the wind for decades while society is dominated by adults obsessively perusing their own interests. It’s so clear that chickens are really coming home to roost with the younger generations, so many of whom come from unstable and fractured backgrounds (something that a few generations ago was very much not the norm). Now so many people don’t even see the purpose or joy of marriage and family as it has just been a place of loneliness and confusion for them. Those in the lowest income brackets have suffered the most from the demise of stable marriage and families, which Rob Henderson describes so well. The greatest gift we have given our children of 23, 20 and 17 is a happy and stable marriage of 27 years. We are Catholic (like Mary) and hold marriage in high regard and it is a Sacrament in the Catholic Church.
How about ask that Think Of The Children for your old "theory" Vivienne? Catholic church not dealing with its sexual predators and religious traumas kids have to deal with? Conveniently "forgotten" theory/practices to judge.
Yeah, no Making a post about the well being of children, and then mentioning the catholic church, is like mentioning Hitler to fight against discrimination😂
I'm Australian and since same sex marriage became legal there has been a 25% swing from parents from government schools to private Roman Catholic schools. I hate to be crude but it basically comes down to learning about Jesus or learning about 5000 genders and how to cut your d*CK off. And I know which is healthier for children. As for the claims above in my country you have always been more likely to be molested in a government school than a RC school. Those monsters seek children where ever they can find them. The trouble is now our own government institutions are monsters as well. In addition the people who rubbish RC schools have probably never been to one. They are not run by the clergy and haven't been since the 1930s. They tend to be mainly married women, and some married men, from Christian backgrounds, but not necessarily RC, but comfortable teaching Christian values, Christian prayers and Bible stories as a small part of the curriculum.
Chris continues to get the best guests. Mary is brilliant and her views on this subject are well-informed, enlightening and come from a place of compassion. Amazing discussion.
Most people don't know what a strong family feels like. Parents that marry for life, siblings that have your back, a home thats always there. Family changes the way you and your children look at the world every day, don't screw it up.
The Pill broke the cycle of violent familial abuse and poverty in my family. My grandmothers lived hellish lives in their rural community...(and yes Chris, some boys *will* force sex on their sisters and cousins, that is not always a psychological barrier, as sadly evidenced in my own family history). My parents married as teens in order to escape. They used The Pill for almost 15 years before starting a family, as a tool to give them the time they needed to ensure their children never experienced poverty. They are still together over 50 years later, and I cannot express enough my admiration for their resilience and determination. When our society discusses the negative consequences of The Pill and the Sexual Revolution, we cannot be blind to the socially positive results either.
Ummmm, we’ve been taking about the benefits of birth control exclusively for the past 50 years. It’s actually time to have a more balanced conversation.
That’s awesome that it worked for them. Nowadays most women who have unplanned pregnancies claim they were on the pill. And it’s supposed to be much more effective now. I think your parents are the except not the rule. And I think society has mostly propped up the sexual revolution as this super positive, empowering thing for women. While I agree there have been a few positives. I actually think the negatives outweigh them. I think it’s time to talk about the destruction it’s caused.
Good conversation. The examples about smoking by doctors in hospitals and everyone drinking gin and how those habits were eliminated, those examples were especially heartwarming because that means, society was in this position in the past and we managed to pull through. The unfortunate difference is that in the past the rich elites had a less influential hold on media and healthcare. Today that hold is complete. I mean, look at how "the current thing" keeps changing and how the corporate media obediently behaves. The covid epidemic showed us how subverted healthcare is.
The fallout is already massive and will increase to an extent that no lie will be able to cover it up. The whole Western world is exploding in slow motion right now.
The whole flip-flopping, do this, do that, politicization, and government shutdown/enforcement process soured me on the medicine as practiced by government entities. That and the vaccines that were not actually vaccines but symptom mitigation technology. They were not and are not now anything more than (warped?) experiments pushed on us as cures. In this case, the cure and policies surrounding it were worse than the disease. See Ex-Governor Cuomo D-NY for more government failures. The number of small and medium businesses that were destroyed/crippled by government and media acquiescence was an unacceptable number. Our police state activities were not as bad as those in some countries, but for a "free" society, they were beyond acceptable. People that lost jobs via corporate caving to government was astoundingly ill advised.
@@kathleenking47 It's even worse than that: The push for heavy sunscreen usage and hiding like an albino leper in the sun has caused mass vitamin D deficiency, which causes increased chances of strokes, heart attacks, and so much more that's FAR worse and pretty much guaranteed by being vitamin D deficient... but the doctors can't admit they're wrong.
Having lived thru the sexual revolution this conversation was immensely helpful to me. It helped bring to a conscious level much of the confusion and “lost-ness” I’ve experienced thru it. Thank you.
I really love Chris's interview style. He asks a lot of questions, as he should, but he also inputs so much of his knowledge and the things he's been learning lately. It makes for a more interesting and balanced interview in my opinion.
Yes he is a genuine , curious man & questioning man yearning for knowledge , truth . I had been a Benjamin Boyce watcher when he started , he went in a different direction.
He’s okay. He’s soft on the question. There’s rarely any push back or opposition viewpoints. Compare this to Triggernometry and you’ll see a big difference.
@@TheSnoopyclone Interesting view, the Triggernometry dudes let feminists walk over them including Kelli-Jay Keen. They actually do practice censorship in spite of their name. The smartest interviewers lead people to expose their actual beliefs , they do not have to do "but you said" or gotcha nonsense.
This is actually scary to be put into words. I'm not quite sure how to fix any of this either. I've watched different things as well about how men and woman compete differently and how most men are just bowing out in society because they can't properly compete with woman. I also grew up with a distant father. This only increases young men's nihilism as well because they don't have anyone to look up to for wisdom, hope or purpose.
My brother u should look up to a masculine figure. Mine was Muhammad Ali. u should study these figures. Im like u too. My father was abusive to my mother and i didn't learn anything
the "fix": 80% of the population dont reproduce and dies of old age 20% of the remaining religious conservatives/Muslims repopulate the earth 100 years from now LOL
Well the good news is it is self-correcting. If you think of this ideology as a virus that's killing it's host then you'll see that the hosts that are inoculated to the ideology are still having children while everyone else are dead men walking.
@@brianmeen2158 Bro, the stats don’t lie. There’s a reason why these young men have given up. There’s a social stigma against masculinity. How hard is it to understand that?
I have so many feels on this topic. Second generation single mother here, and it has been devastating from my perspective. I don't know if my son will have children. Obviously, there are many factors, but I do think this is a huge one, and my mother had me out of wedlock "to fix herself', and though she did her best, it was no substitute for a whole, healthy family. My son's father and I did not last more than 3 years, though I am grateful they do spend some time together, even now that he is an adult. I think birth control was terrible for our bodies and our families, even though I would not take it away. It did shift the blame and burden of unplanned pregnancy on the women, while also increasing the incidence of that dramatically. Thank you both for having this conversation.
It’s called the Volvo effect; people feel safer in safe cars and then drive more recklessly. Similar in intercourse, the safety of contraceptives incentivizes more and more risky sxual behavior.
i respect everything you said except bc putting the blame on women it will always be on you because that’s yalls responsibility sex is in the control of women not men
Written like a person who has never been raped or sexually assaulted. If only things were that simplistic. I do not aspire for a society that pushes off blame and shame always on someone or something else, rather than taking individual responsibility for our collective existance. We are all in this together, and so long as "blame" and "fault" are at the heart of the conversation then we are doomed to wallow in misery and suffering. @@jesterbons1558
That is a very narrow minded and unhelpful attitude from my perspective. Human civilization is up to us all to propagate in healthy ways. Men and women need to take responsibility together. The 'blame game' is not serving us very well. @@jesterbons1558
Women where MOSTLY ALLWAYS blamed for pregnancies or the lack of, unplanned, out of wetlock, being raped and so on. Men where mostly excused. History tell us this and nowadays. Has nothing to do with birthcontrol meds.😢
Mary is just so knowledgeable yet gracious and empathetic to the consequences of policies that were not well thought out. Sadly culpability and selfish indulgence prevents those, in the position to make real change, from viewing it with a critical eye, and instead they hope it resolves just itself. Finger pointing is de rigueur in all camps and nothing is being done to remedy it. Thanks for this. 🙏🏽
Wait, reducing the cost of sex for men and increasing the risk of sex for women left good men, women, and children holding the bill? Who would've thunk it other than everyone else in history before yesterday?
This is one of the most competent and emotionally grounded insightful women I’ve ever listened to. Even with the limits of the video and the obvious issue of her age, she’s still instinctively more attractive to me at 46 than a vast majority of “women” 20 years younger than me. Think about that.
@@aaronm.2718Why should we be archaic? If the past was so great we wouldn't keep changing. Women were miserable and forced to give birth and pressured or forced to get married. And we should be in a hurry to lose our autonomy AGAIN, even more than we already have? Please.
Bravo for this wonderful woman who did the digging for facts for her first book…and the, adding to it even more with her 2nd book with shocking, truthful data. I was 12 when the sexual revolution was really huge. As a Freshman in high school, I didn’t want to believe that’s when they inserted “Sex Education” in the Health Class. All I heard was boys bragging about which girls they “effed last night”. And I’ve been watching the negative outcome for all ever since. So glad she did the research!! 👏👏👏
@@hashibyan3😂😂😂. I lol because I’m thinking about why do women initiate divorce? These conversations are important but relationships are not functioning in any idealism most of them and this is a part of why divorces occur so much imho. Dishonesty. Unwillingness to compromise. Burn out. Isolation…yes isolation whilst in a relationship. Abuse. Infidelity. Entitlement. Mismanagement of Monies Etc etc.. You must all but be righteous to have a good relationship free of riff raff that one must pray their partner FORGIVES if and when it does occur.
You have to remind that child support laws are a thing because many men in the past wouldn't take care of the kids they fathered and could easily walk away and form another family.
42:00 the person who did see it coming from miles away was Esther Villar in her book “The Manipulated Man.” Its a really dark piece of philosophy that explains the social dynamics of men and women. Its a rough read because it uses pretty strong analogies but its spot on and so profound in its foretelling of what would result from the sexual revolution
Also almost every religion knew what a mess sexual liberation would prove to become. And not just religion, but folk or traditional wisdom. It's really quite an arrogant position to take- That people in the past necessarily and automatically knew less about everything, than we know today.
I love when people recommend books! Surprised people still know how to read, I keep getting these clips of teachers quitting and saying their 7th graders cant read 😱
Oh, nevermind. Just reading the intro sounds like someone who has never had the opportunity to humor a male try to prove that she's "not like the others" 😂 It's no wonder these texts never take off. I listened to an audiobook book that reminds me of this and it was painful, just a bunch of complaining done in a tone that made it clear why no one likes them 🤯
@@pahakuuttiChesterton’s fence. Don’t have the hubris to remove something from society unless you have the full accurately knowledge from the people who put it there, as to why it exists.
I saw it consciously by high school and knew it before that in a way that was less articulable. But even in high school I knew there was almost no one who would be willing to understand, regardless of my eloquence and specificity.
I notice people are quick to point out and use the word misogyny and what people perceive is "hatred", if so then we've lived through decades of misandry but you rarely hear it pointed out. But overall, the interview is VERY important and has ALOT of good information. Quick edit: I STRONGLY DISAGREE that fatherless homes are fatherless mostly because the fathers are bad!
Wow as someone who has lived all of these decades I find this spot on. I lived in San Francisco in the late sixties and early seventies and never married because I saw too many women left with one or two children because a man decided marriage and a kid or two were just too heavy a trip for them to handle. This was a time when women were not welcome in the workforce. Yes, women have paid a terrible price. This is a conversation we have needed for a long time.
What you saw where women who didn’t use their heads to pick an upstanding man to be a father. Which should have just shown you what not to do and what needed to be done ( vet a man for his worthiness.. ) Women have paid a terrible price . . . I’d flip that being a man saying women have put a terrible narrative on good men and haven’t said there is trash men and trash women. And I’m going to choose to be a normal and upstanding human
San Francisco in the late 1960s... Whoa! I was born in 1967. My first memory in life is a hippie blowing pot smoke in my face and laughing about it. Imagine being four years old and a "flower power hippie" choking you out. Of course, I've never heard a feminist detail horrors against children by San Francisco dopers.
Unpopular opinion, but I'll stand by it: The pill should *NOT* exist. Period. There are supposed to be repercussions to random sex. Nature makes it so, through childbirth, through STD's, and through pair-bonding; but we keep going out of our way to make sex just some fun little activity. It's not that simple and meaningless though. Sex is supposed to result in the potential creation of life, and it's how two people share their love and/or appreciation for each other. A lot of our intersexual societal issues will be resolved if we start treating sex with the respect it's supposed to have.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 You won't find any argument here. I don't think sex should be recreational for either sex. It's a serious activity with serious consequences.
@@wyleecoyotee4252 Of course. Who doesn't? That's life though. Sacrifices must often be made to get to an end goal. Recreational sex is great for instant gratification, but the long-term effects on individuals and society aren't worth it.
The pill, like most of modern civilisation is a product of its time, the future looks like the past, and the past did not have the Industrial Revolution….whilst new civilisations will emerge after ours has long gone, they will be Low Energy ones…..
I find it hard sometimes, to sit and listen to hour long podcasts (short attention span) but this held my attention and I can understand 100% what this lovely, level headed lady was saying AND agree wholeheartedly! Thank you Chris, great podcast, it should be screened in every senior school!
quite the blanket statement to say that fatherless homes are because the dad was bad. her saying misogamy several times without saying misandry at all was another strange instance...
It would be nice if we could keep the positive aspects of the sexual revolution while rolling back the negative. I think a lot of people overlook the problems that existed before the 60's as it related to sex. Tons of sexually wound up people, people rushing into ruinously bad marriages because they "just wanted to have sex", unhappy marriages with awful sex because no one was willing to communicate their needs and desires, etc etc. And interesting metric pre-sexual revolution was that prostitution was much more common among married men because most men had utterly boring and pathetic sex lives with their frigid wives who had had the idea pounded into their heads that "sex is bad, sex is bad, sex is bad." It would be nice to move forward aiming for more chastity in society while simultaneously embracing the idea that sex in a stable long term relationship/marriage is a beautiful and joyous thing.
The only huge problem you pointed out is people thinking with their sexual desires and more importantly not fucking communicating. But "sexual freedom" didn't help in the slightest and this video is literally about that. But it isn't about the 60's it's about today which matters a little bit more
I agree with you. I once tried to have a conversation with my grandmother about sex and when I mentioned "female orgasm" she looked at me completely confused. When I explained I meant the pleasure at the climax of sex, she told me "oh, that stuff is for men." Pre-sexual revolution, female sexuality was suppressed and many had no idea that women COULD enjoy sex. They just had to "lie back and think of England". I think that's terribly sad. While I don't love the sexual culture we have today, I wouldn't go back for anything.
I came of age in 1980 and was among the first generation to feel the charge of social change resulting from this revolution… only, we were still being supported (in Australia anyway) by the structures and certainties of our parents (children during the war). Our experiments came quickly to an end and we could still retreat to that social architecture… phew! However, our millennial children came of age after social media had started to bite and all that you talk about here makes up their world- the hopelessness, polarisation and loneliness. I agree with Mary that we should see deeper into the sadness of the loss of family support systems… of a belief in something beyond the material. I reflect on my own youth and can only in hindsight see how that rebellion was not clever or original, but absolutely on point for the times.
Your right it was OK at the time bc parents were distracted with this shit the haze is fading the problem is alot of ppl want to have that blank mind syndrome but women need to understand men saw how you moved and the things that have been done so it's just too late it's about to get worse alot of women or opioid dependant and are dying fast especially pornstars and sexworkers sorry for errors
26:00 excellent point. We tend to focus on the role a father has in educating their offspring on how to navigate life, but we forget the importance of wider family bonds - especially siblings.
I thought it wanted equality? Not what is best for women? Don't women want equality in the bad things of life too? E.g. homelessness, prison, early death, victimisation by crime etc? Or only in the good bits?
no. She said there have been winners from this pathology and it is men, especially "predatory" men. You can mash a keyboard so you must have the basic capacity to see that is not at all the same. What she said means; it benefits men and the men that benefit are more likely to be predators. THAT is what she actually said. Just the effing 99% do not know how to think in a valid way so she gets a pass with her misandry
@@mysticaltyger2009 they are the only ones getting exactly what they want- the women they use usually want commitment that Chad has no incentive to give
@@mysticaltyger2009 I get the feeling they always gloss it over because they want average men to believe women's hypergamy isn't a biological force, so society (both politically right and left) can benefit from our productivity. It's a way to keep us motivated, to keep hidden the female mating strategy that makes non-related males disposable. The risk that men will pursue the betterment of themselves rather than a woman or the state is unacceptable.
The first part put me off because she seems to be speaking with the premise that condoms don't exist and the only birth control is the pill, so all the responsibility falls on women. Men have options and responsibilities as well. But I appreciated the second part and particularly the discussion about having male/female friends young so when people grow up they know how to communicate properly.
38:00 Women don't know much about men because they don't listen when men tell them about men's thoughts and expectations. Instead, their heads are full of what other women have told them is true about men, and they won't jettison any wrong information no matter how many times it fails them. Like Sideshow Bob on The Simpsons, they keep stepping on the same rakes that just sprung up and whacked them in the face rather than accept that they were misled. It's not lack of access to information - it's lack of willingness to admit error and accept new information.
55:40 She is just wrong on this point. She's clinging to the tired old feminist saw that broken homes are the result of selfish, immature men abandoning their children. Plenty of fatherless homes are the result of divorce, which statistics consistently bear out are 70+ percent initiated by women. A great many kids are fatherless because of no-fault divorce, anti-male bias in family courts, "Duluth Model" policing, no-evidence-needed restraining orders, and the economic hardship in the aftermath of all the aforementioned factors where a man would otherwise be present.
Several facts to consider: 1. Wages for men and women have not kept pace with inflation for 50 years, so all workers are making less today. Government statistics indicate that the average annual wage for 80 percent of workers is only $50,000. That's not enough for one person to support a spouse and certainly not a family with children. 2. During the same 50 years, women have achieved equality. Today, women legally have all the financial opportunities as men. More women than men are graduating from college. 3. Today's online dating indicates that most men can't get dates, primarily because more men reject the marriage contract that largely discriminates against them. 4. Most women today believe they're entitled to the highest earning men, especially if these women have high-earning careers. Statistically, women don't date men who earn less. If they earn the same as men, hypergamy occurs, and she swings to higher branches. 5. Evolutionary psychology still drives women to seek men who can "provide and protect," though that is no longer necessary if women pursue the opportunities they've achieved. They don't. For example, less than 10 percent of engineers today are women. 6. Women's average hourly wages are less than those of men, because women typically don't pursue more difficult, higher paying jobs. And, half of women take time off from work to have children. Sexual discrimination plays a small role in wage differences today. 7. Women's expectations of what they deserve are financially delusional. They're also socially delusional. While women naturally seek men with money, men seek women with beauty. Nearly half of US women today are obese, and the number is growing. These women definitely will not be attractive to the men they want.
This "privilege" of protecting women is definitely lost at this point. In fact, I made a video regarding rates of men willing to protect women decreasing over time in part due to the behavior of narcissistic women. There are many men now who have gone their own way from taking on this role.
The privilege of protecting women has to go along with a social contract that ended a hundred years ago. It doesn't but women still receive the same benefits the social contract is broken!!
I heard all this being talked about and predicted as a kid 35 years ago listening to Christian radio programs. More data and better arguments will not overcome the human lust for moral autonomy and instant gratification. Much suffering awaits us. It's the only thing that gets humans attention for all of history. 😮💨
This conversation is the refreshing breath of fresh air following sixty years of society telling us that breathing sea water is a normal and pleasurable experience.
I have been fighting this change in society my whole life. I am a masculine man former Army officer, biker club president, church deacon, 32 year Habitat for Humanity volunteer. I have been married for 45 years to one woman. I am a father who was a little league coach, scout leader, 4H leader that took my children and grandchildren to church. My brother and I took care of our father who was an invalid for two years before he died, changing his diapers, urine bag and clothes, etc.. Now, I take care of my mother with Dementia. I have taught my family that faith and family is everything. We care for each other and support each other. No one is left behind.
Womens movement put a lot of pressure on mens income, especially the traditional family man, because they had to compete with a rush of women as cheap labor choices for corporate America at a time , late sixties / seventies & beyond , when the economy was stressed to begin with
This was a great guest. She had a couple fresh new insights on this general topic that I really thought were interesting: 1. The lack of discussion about the children and whats best for them. Seems to be we should prioritize creating the best environments and situations we can for them yet it seems to be sidelined in these conversations generally. 2. The distinction between pleasure and long term happiness 3. Increase of men going to therapy for pornography addiction
Great interview and discussion. It is much appreciated and Mary Eberstadt is a treasure. Here are a couple of contrarian thoughts: 1. The Patriarchy cannot disappear in authentic Christianity. It is built into the fabric of Trintarian theology and New Testament ethics. Despite Evangelicals going soft on this issue, it will come back in a strong way. 2. Eberstadt's metaphor of a wild party is spot on. But this includes profligate spending by the government on female-oriented programs that shield women from the negative consequences of the crazy party. There is no end in sight for this spending so the greatest monetary crash in world history will come. This will abruptly end the 60s party. 3. With the crash, people will start to listen--without revulsion--to those who have been making a cogent case against women's suffrage. This includes the original anti-suffragettes and contemporary voices.
People today don't even learn how to talk to their peers. They're rude, aggressive, constantly get triggered or feel threatened. Society itself is crumbling through the (self)isolation of the individual
This lady is my new hero. I read her book Primal Screams, in one plane ride, couldn't put it down. But seeing her and listening to her speak on it all makes me all the more her fan. She knows what she is talking about it and she clearly cares.
Absolutely incredible content as always Chris. I love how you are building your library of knowledge as well as your skills of communication as a speaker / podcaster. Eberstadt's perspectives are refreshing- I never thought as much about the shotgun wedding, or how communities united by ideas are replacing old school family principles. The abandonment of family trickling down into the affect of the elderly is another topic we need to truly understand. The wisdom of old is being inherited less and less by the young, as our exposure to one another decreases. I would also like to add to the notion that the sexual revolution has been the central cause of increased divorce and declining life expectancy. Processed food and in general less nutritional diets have some cause on our now declining life expectancy, as well as gross happiness. Also the introduction of television as a pastime has expanded these depressing outcomes. Each step is inspiring as you learn and we as your subscribers learn too from listening. I pray you continue your skepticism as you surround yourself with perspectives that often clash. It is your sword and shield that grows as you can brtter observe, empathize, ask and explain the world's phenomenon. Always excited for your future... And always taking notes myself. Thank you 🙏
Brilliant woman, a joy to listen to. Great interview! To you dorks out there, do not sleep around, do not have sex without the express intention to have children. Get married, have children and be fulfilled.
yeah no. @ 0:00 she still found a way to play victim when taking accountability on behalf of feminists. she brought up predatory men, but most men aren't predatory, so why even bring that up? smh. she's no different from the other women, she's only telling the truth because she's older now & knows better. but all women start talking red pill after they hit the wall. so thats nothing new.
Or just don't listen to how a woman must live, but do what you love most! Feminism, social standards, toxic masculinity are Fake like money and time....
Sooooooo excited to see this combo. Mary Eberstadt is an icon of common sense family forward ideas - a truly respected social scientist. Chris, you're no bad either ❤
I totally agree with Chris on his theory of practice communications in early life with the opposite sex. I started dating - having a girlfriend - at age 13. Yes, a bit young by most standards (but I was dating older girls). Point is, I recognized then, and even more so now, that this was essential training for successful coupling/mating. I didn't know what I was doing when it came to girl friends, but I knew I had to learn so I jumped in knowing that there was going to be some messiness. It is recognized that people who are successful in long-term partnering do so because of many factors. However, I believe that the early practice of coupling/dating creates experience for people in making better decisions about who to couple with later in life when the stakes are much greater - financially, raising children, and societal participation. Early practice communications leads to dating early; early dating leads to breakups which is a necessary feedback loop to understanding compatibility, and thus better mating selections.
Sexual revolution worked fine for our parent's generation in the 60s and 70s because they have received better education from their parents. That is the problem we are having, our generation has failed our children, we have been way too lax and we haven't been able to instill the same values we have received from our parents in the 80s and 90s. There can be a middle ground where contraception is for everyone but commitment is still an important value. Of course as long as young people are told that traditional values are oppressive, that it's ok to hook up with whomever just to scratch an itch and as long as marriage remains a huge one-sided risk for men and fathers because of unfair legislation it is going to be pretty hard to rectify the situation.
Like a machine that drives through a path of a minefield so others can get through. Her work paved the way for men like me and Chris to be able to even open this up for discussion. Bless her
Amazing work Chris, love to listen to this conversation. It's everything I felt for years and couldn't put the right words to describe. I just bought her book thanks to you.
