Disorganized Attachment ‐ 1st strategy for healing | Dr Sia

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Hi, my name is Dr Sia. I am a psychotherapist, lecturer, and researcher. As per usual, I hope you comment, subscribe, and press that bell icon for regular updates.
In this video I talk about disorganized attachment and how people with this type of attachment tend to not ask questions and instead assume attack from others.
Also, make sure to follow me on @doctorsia on insta for regular written posts, IGTV posts, and live IGTV sessions on Thursdays at 19.30 AEST and more!
To contact me for sessions, supervision, or training, via telehealth or face to face:
Email: hello@mindhackpsychology.com.au
Website: www.mindhackpsy...
Telephone: +617 5591 5976
Instagram: @doctorsia

Опубликовано:

3 окт 2024

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Комментарии : 43

@Jamie-CityOnAHill 2 года назад

This is great! I never ask questions and assume… partly because of rejection.

@drsia2323 2 года назад

Yes I can see how that would be the case! Thank you kindly for commenting!

@laluna424 9 месяцев назад

Same with me...eventually that rejection happens but i dont ask questions specially in my personal life

@niggaflies 5 месяцев назад

@@drsia2323I agree! Even when people lie having them explain makes them more intentional of what they are doing.

@lifecoachingtoronto Год назад

Asking questions puts them in the drivers seat, which makes most people feel calmer right off the bat :)

@sammymakeitmakecents 3 месяца назад

This is slightly challenging. Because, unfortunately, we tend to be drawn more to narcissistic and insecure attachment styles. These people tend to be highly not self aware. I’ve tried to have conversations with people like this, where I express why something they’ve said or done doesn’t feel good to me. And then I get the “oh no, I love you I didn’t mean that at all.” Only for them to keep saying and doing things that show they have some underlying jealousy or something towards me. Questions and conversations are good with people who can be accountable and honest about their intentions/feelings.

@m.e.l9482 Месяц назад

I came here to say this. This is fabulous with a healthy partner but unfortunately those of us with this attachment style tend to attract emotional manipulators/ narcassistic people so they will have further scope to gaslight us.

@noelmagne7657 24 дня назад

@@m.e.l9482wow this is me 😢

@thisgirlkarenn Год назад

Oh this is so helpful. I've got to gather the courage to ask questions. I always assume 🤦‍♀️

@Mybigmess 9 месяцев назад

This is a tricky one because when I said to this friend that what she said hurt me, she was like everything I say is to help you blablabla but I told my therapist and she advised me not to turn to this friend bc she was angry with the world and she wouldn't give me good advice.... Sometimes the other person's view is distorted and they think are doing good but in the end they hurt, so i recommend being careful. This "friend" is not a friend anymore bc she got angry and told me to return all the presents she got me for my birthday, my therapist told me to lose contact with her because she wasn't a good person

@Theohybrid 19 дней назад

Dude, thank you for this!

@sleep458 Год назад

but what if i ask them too much and they hate me-

@markraneses5353 Год назад

lmaooo true 🥲

@laluna424 9 месяцев назад

Thats fear of rejection

@La-Donna 2 месяца назад

Thanks for this actionable tip. I’m very guilty of assuming the worst and running with that assumption.

@lavenderwarrior1 5 месяцев назад

it is so hard to ask when your partner snaps on you for asking a question, that they think should be obvious because it is not apparent to me. Which makes me not want to ask anything.

@whiggygirl 6 дней назад

I get constantly criticised by my DA for asking questions 😢

@noelmagne7657 24 дня назад

Very true

@cornellcutie1 9 месяцев назад

But what happens if the person is and you just exposed your vulnerability to them?

@bbbbraveheart 11 месяцев назад

me, disorganized attachment, 😭 really wanna change it. it hurts me a lot!

@Bethanysbranch 6 месяцев назад

Thank you!

@ericadams6804 Год назад

This is very good

@charlotte5671 Год назад

What does Amber Heard & Johnny Depp have to do with this? I'm genuinely curious

@whenyousmileismiletoo5419 Год назад

People wont just answer us sincerely of course they will lie right to our faces

@tb8827 Год назад

Exactly.

@nobodyreally777 11 месяцев назад

😅ok cuz I thought I was the only one ppl will gaslight you

@mermaidtales4009 Месяц назад

You look like Jake Gyllenhaal's handsome older brother!!!😂❤

@karasmusic123 24 дня назад

Negative attribution bias.

@darbylane 8 месяцев назад

How do I heal a wound of abandonment and feeling of being a victim but feeling like I deserve to be a victim and abandoned??

@jm7514 3 месяца назад

For me, it wasn’t inner child work- it was adulting. Embrace my strength of being strong and tell my inner child ( and my emotional inner/ private outbursts) that I got this, I am in control - if someone hurts us, we can leave, or respond etc- that I got this, we are not stuck anymore.

@jm7514 3 месяца назад

That is, that person who taught us that we were not worthy- they are broken or, in my case, a shit human being. And if I keep embracing that negative self view- they are winning. That’s not an option

@its.BiG.mamaaaa 10 месяцев назад

But what if they say no but in fact they are going to hurt me , betray me , hate on me , judge me or whatever

@random_citizenn 10 месяцев назад

What if You ask questions and people take it personal?

@jm7514 3 месяца назад

I argue that the first thing a disorganized person should do is learn trust. They won’t ask questions if they believe that they will be lied to.

@cspace1234nz Месяц назад

….chances are they are being lied to

@박돌-m9e 8 месяцев назад

But asking those questions make me feel like Im being so defensive... no? Am I assuming things again 😭

@nastarannastarani9171 2 года назад

🙏❤️

@drsia2323 2 года назад

thanks

@adelacelle 5 месяцев назад

I don't think it's good advice because it's not applicable. It gets old really fast to receive constant questions like this. It has to come from within. People cannot calm us 24/7 with endless questionning.