I'm literally in a treatment house for my anorexia right now and I just finished season 3 of heart stopper! I didn't know anything about it going in and the eating disorder plot really caught me off guard. I feel like they cover it really well though, what it's like living in a treatment house and dealing with an eating disorder. I have anorexia and OCD so I can definitely relate to Charlie. I had some good cries watching this season but it was very cathartic
I had a friend at Uni that had anorexia. She had been to a treatment centre when she was younger. She handled it very well, but when she got stressed - like at exam time - she would just forget to eat. She told me about it and so when it was coming up for exams, I would meet up with her almost every day and do a 'study and lunch' session. So I was sure she had eaten at least one meal that day. It was a small thing, but I think it helped.
I'll always be grateful to this show because it helped me realize I have OCD. Most media depictions are of contamination OCD or other organization/cleanliness-focused types, so seeing Charlie deal with a form that is specifically around eating is a great representation of the fact that OCD manifests in many different ways
The show addresses EDs (and mental health) and recovery with such care in a way I haven’t seen before. It also shows how complicated they are in a genuine way. I wish there had been shows like Heartstopper when I was a teen going through an ED.
In regards to NHS treatment wait lists - I recently went to my GP having just begun to feel my relapse was getting out of control. I expected there to be a long wait. The next day someone from the ED service called to triage the referral and I was offered an assessment in 2 weeks. My treatment started 2 weeks after that. Historically my diagnosis has always been Anorexia. This time, despite losing weight rapidly, I didn't become underweight before the service picked me up and I've been able to stabilise my eating and prevent further damage to my body. I have been so surprised by how responsive and intensive the support has been despite me being very much a routine, non-urgent case. This is how services should be in every area!
Informative, articulate, compassionate-- you're awesome, Dr. Elliott. What a valuable service you're providing with your videos. Looking forward to the next one. ❤
YOU DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH I'VE BEEN WAITING FOR YOU TO REACT TO THIS CHAPTER!!! LOVE ALL YOUR VIDEOS, YOUR REACTIONS TO HEARTSTOPPER ARE ALWAYS SUPERBBBBBB
Can I just say how happy it makes me that when you talk about the mental health interdisciplinary team you mention Occupational Therapist!! I’m from the US and I’m an OT and it feels like people are constantly forgetting about us and the skills that we have to support people dealing primarily with mental health (or in fact that our profession grew out of the mental health reform movement). So thanks for mentioning OT in the context and not leaving us out 😌
I really loved this special episode, even though it once again brought the tears. I think it’s so good that the normally-upbeat, bright, colourful show took the time to dedicate an entire episode to therapy, eating disorders, OCD and other mental struggles (for both Charlie and everyone else in his life). My own struggles have definitely proven that it’s not quick and easy getting support or getting through it all. Finally, it was unexpected but I liked the format of splitting the episode into the two different perspectives too.
I've struggled with an eating disorder and was recently diagnosed with OCD (about a year ago). It's definitely difficult to tease the two apart because they become almost inextricably linked to one another. I've since gone into remission from the eating disorder thanks to great therapy and I am being treated for my OCD which has proven super helpful. This show has represented both very well and I'm so glad people are seeing such a positive and realistic representation of these two mental illnesses.
This episode and episode 3 just about made me bawl my eyes out. Regarding the pusha dn pull dynamic, I can definitely recognize that as someone who has depression and anxiety. Thankfully I have a partner who sees when I try to pull away and simply won't let me (this works for us but may be unhealthy for others, just FYI).
I have experience with the wait times Dr Elliott mentioned in regards to treatment on the NHS. The Last wait time I was quoted was 12 months, possibly more. It's tough.
I’m a physiology lecturer and a big thing for us these days is trying to get rid of the word ‘normal’. We go on about it constantly now to students to get them to understand that one size does not fit all, and that calling things normal can actually be really exclusionary or offensive to people, even if that’s the last thing you were trying to do. Also can stop people appreciating the rich variety there is in the human experience, and that, just because you don’t match the textbook, it doesn’t mean there is necessarily something ‘wrong’ with you. Thank you for your videos.😊
I love how they represented inpatient treatment and what you said about it. I remember being shocked when I was first hospitalized for my eating disorder because so much of the focus was on my physical health and not so much about the mental health aspects of it. But now I realize how important it was to just get to a place of physical safety. First, work on the malnourishment and second was to start the therapy work. At the time it felt weird and kind of frustrating, but now I totally understand that when I was terribly unhealthy physically, it wasn’t even possible to start unpacking the rest of it.
This is probably the most relevant episode.. I've been talking with people about the concept of OCD a lot what's 10s watching this season. I think, I just feel like I can sympathize for OCD but also don't understand it at all. My brain doesn't know how to completely dislodge from reality and logic. In Charlie's case, well he's a teenager. What grass has he ever had on reality and logic. Getting turned around in your own head is easy. I think kids with OCD can get really bad, really fast because of this
"Normal" changes. It's different for everyone and it's even different for us at the various stages of our life and after each impactful experience. 2023 was a pretty brutal year for my mental health and I'm still left with some of the effects such as faster and more frequent fatigue amongst other things. But that's my normal for now. Striving to return to previous stages is really not a productive way of thinking to me. I often say I can give 100% every day but what that 100% is will also be different every day and I accept that and work to manage my "normal". Normal doesn't mean it won't change but maybe our expectations and our ways of dealing with things will so we have more better days more consistently and don't seek forgiveness on the days we don't.
Did you completely skip over the part where Nick broke down crying into Tao’s arms at the party? I get skipping over the other storylines because the focus in this episode is on Charlie, but Nick’s own mental health is inexorably intertwined with Charlie’s. if you haven’t seen that scene, I highly recommend that you do and share your thoughts on how that made you feel (the transference and counter-transference) - personally, I was a mess after that scene!
Total agreement with this here. It was the scene that absolutely got to me the most. And yes, there is a lot in this episode about Nick‘s mental health and how it is affected by his concerns about Charlie. It’s absolutely a subject that comes up in later episodes as well.
Every single reactor I've seen has almost solely focused on that scene. I was very refreshed by someone caring about the person in crisis and not focusing all their attention on the "burden" on supporters. This fandom's discourse has been the most ableist and alienating thing I've ever experienced.
@@wavy6617 Perhaps, but Dr. Elliott is not just any other reactor. He is a psychiatrist and I was very curious to hear his opinion when it comes to that particular scene or even just the ending part of that scene - I find it hard to see how a brief spotlight on Nick’s emotional “low point” while we are obviously following Nick’s narration of the events would take away anything from the entire rest of the video. In my view, the extraordinary vulnerability that just bursts out of Nick in that moment is more important than his distracted driving moment, which Dr. Elliott does comment on in the video.
Charlie had shared a little with Mr. Ajayi at school about the rules he had, and how some unknown bad thing would happen if he didn't follow them. Are there any requirements about school staff reporting such disclosures in the UK?
Where i live theres a law where you would have to report child abuse if someome discloses it, but only a few people are legally bound to do so (in this case it’d be a principal not a teacher) i dont think maybe for charlies case but would follow up with parents or services etc. from what i googled in ireland (not the uk lol) the required people are: those working in health and social care, organised sports, religion, teaching and law enforcement, and managers of language schools, domestic violence shelters and accommodation for asylum seekers and those who are homeless.
They really hit every angle of this issue so well... Charlie's struggles and inner thoughts around this problem, the fact that it takes a whole team of professionals to get the help that is necessary. And then the toll that it takes on Nick as he struggles to try and take care of Charlie and be there for him. This isn't just hard for the person going through it, the people around you will struggle too as things get worse. They even showed the guilt that others might feel, who didn't know anything was wrong until it was too late. That conversation on the phone between Charlie and Tao was important too.
When i watched this (i both mentioned to my therapist and one for my ed) and i went to my therapist and was like ‘oh my god this is gonna sound so weird, but like, charlies 1-1 on the pysch ward, really reminded me of you😭’ and she was like ‘oh my god why?’ And i was like ‘idk she was british and gave off mum energy?!!!’
As someone who has been in-patient treated technically 3 times (for different aspects, at different facilities, with different goals) I can say it is accurate. Everyone handles inpatient treatment differently and for some people it can be too stressful to be helpful, even under the best circumstances. I found it quiet helpful in each case as I am in my strength alone - i was raised an only child with semi-neglectful parents so being alone is rather comfortable for me. It gave me the ability to focus and really absorb the information the professionals tried to give me. Yes, there were obviously other patients in each case and every facility encouraged socialization strongly but it can still feel very lonely being surrounded by new people; strangers. Some patients found the rules of the facilities to e intolerable, while others like myself found them to be in line with our own general values to start, and reasonable given the circumstances. Treatment is bloody hard no matter who9 you are - and especially for the poor co-dependants on the other side of it.
I have OCD and gonna have (hopefully) have treatment for it, already did some ERP but now it will be combined with rTMS. we dont have a NHS but a Insurance based system and they won't pay for the rTMS part, so I will have to. but if it helps me out of this hell its worth it
I don't have lived experience of an ED but I do have OCD, with my obsessions and compulsions taking the form of magical thinking mostly. It sounds like Charlie's do to an extent as well, with him saying he feels like if he breaks his rules that he'll die (for me it's something terrible will happen a family member). I never managed to access treatment on the NHS for my OCD, GPs never seemed to think it was bad enough to refer me because CBT waiting lists were so long at the time so I had to manage at the time. It is these days mostly like background noise I can ignore (though my therapist pointed out that I'm probably expending more mental energy daily than I realise ignoring it) but at it's worst it very much controlled my life.
Some of those Cuckoo's Nest stories are, sadly, quote true, in America. There's a doc, which was hidden for decades, called the Titticut Follies, which seems to be one of the ultimate, "DON'T DO THIS" examples.
Elliott? This episode reminded me of the movie "Ordinary People" If you haven't seen it, it is a film right up your alley. Anyway, thanks for the video 😊👍
Jeesh, I wish I had an army of kind, loving family members, dream boyfriends, friends, doctors, nurses, and nutritionists to help me with MY problems... they say money can't buy happiness, but I can only presume it helps with payroll. This episode made me sniffle though.
I've always thought the concept of 'normal' is a bit of a fairytale. There are billions of people in the world, all with differences in their personalities, what does normal represent? Is it those that I think are most like me or the average of human experience. I just think there are people and we're all different.
There has to be some country doing this right. I know it's not the UK and it's most certainly not the USA. Who does it well? Whose model is the one to emulate?
Charlie kept grabbing at his upper arm in times of stress or anxiety. I've heard a couple of theories about why he might have done that. But I would like to hear your thoughts on that.
@@lynnspring2378 Yes, that is what I was thinking, that it is part of the compulsion. Others wondered if it was a self-soothing behavior. I was just wondering what the doctor's opinion was on the topic!
I wish the show had a bit more time to explore the state of eating disorder healthcare and feel the going private was a bit brushed over as there will be a lot of people who can't afford that.
I know it was a big episode for mental health but I'd have also loved your thoughts and insight on the Nick stuff dealing with life without Charlie. Maybe it's just coming from a filmmaking perspective as someone who studied that and it was probably some of the best filmed scenes of the show as well as building up Nick's identity crisis we see later on in the finale.
I'm not from the UK, but The Netherlands, and I've been to lots of different therapies but my longest waiting time was almost 2 years for specialized BPD schema therapy (I later found out I'm autistic and do not have bpd lol). About a full year for 5 months of an inpatient program for psychosomatic problems and 9 months for an ASD assessment. The BPD one being before covid ruined all waiting lists and also being the most necessary therapy at the time as I was insanely suicidal. Physical health care isn't much better either... I waited 2.5 years for eye surgery and then twice a full year for eyelid surgery. Theres so much more I could list. 🥲 Being (chronically) ill requires so, SO much patience.
