Does Your Avoidant Ex Miss You? 

Why is it always the anxious attacher who has to pander to the avoidants needs, even during the breakup. Why are our needs never met ? Only theirs, its so frustrating !!!

Man my wife and I split around January and the first few months were ROUGH. I realized I can’t control the uncontrollable, and decided to focus on myself. It’s the easiest it’s been so far for me. The sadness doesn’t hurt as much and as long. I’m finding myself again and I am enjoying my life. Everyone going through it I promise you it WILL get better. It was hard for me to believe that too back then. Remember you are loved.

Being with an Avoidant is not really worth the mental abuse unless they want to help themselves. Its a selfish way of thinking but you will get hurt unless they recognize.

Mine came back out of nowhere last year. Things were great for 3 months and then she left again completely out of nowhere. It’s like an on/off switch for them.

I’m starting to think the breakup was for the better. My avoidant ex broke up with me 3 months ago over something similar - I wanted more commitment than he was able to give. I think about and miss him everyday, and truly hoped we could repair things, but maybe I do deserve or need more. I am thankful that this breakup taught me that I am naturally more anxious as I can now work to improve myself in being more secure. But him… I doubt he will change anytime soon. How could he? It seems very rare for an avoidant to take the time to be introspective enough to work on their attachment when it’s so much easier for them to run away.

My avoidant told me when she's not talking to me, she's not mad and doesn't miss me, she's just indifferent. In other words, she just doesn't care, while I'm bummed out. After several weeks or months she'll start to miss me and reach out. Rinse and repeat. I still see her now and then but now I'm pretty much indifferent, I can take or leave it.

Its heart breaking Journey with an avoidant partner 💔 especially if you have an anxious attachment. They reach out pull back ...and always want to suggest friendships after a break up Patience is key but its a hard road .

While watching this video, I imagine myself explaining the avoidant attachment theory to the avoidant: "I now understand why you're an avoidant...because you were neglected by your parents during your childhood..." 😂 ✌️ Peace. Just imagining a funny scene in my creative mind because my connection style is anxious. I swear, I do understand what coach is saying and it is very helpful. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️🌟🌟🌟🌟🌟🍀🍀🍀🍀🍀

my ex did all the stuff mentioned in the video too. But I think he is to afraid to reach out, because he is to afraid that I would reject him. (He has a history with fear of recejection)

My avoidant ex is so confusing!We’ve been in no contact except for practical stuff regarding bills etc. He’s being kind of passive agressive in his approach - very eager to help with bills on his initiative, but very cold in his way of communicating it. It’s like we’re complete strangers (with some stored resentment) yet wanting to help financially, which he isn’t obligated too. What’s the coldness about, when all I’ve been is respectful of the breakup?

Craig I love you!! 😂❤ 9:34 the “ maybe he was just smoking so weed chillin out playin some video games “ Hahahah idk why that made me laugh! The way you said it was so casual hahahaha ur so funny ! You’re videos always help me out and make me laugh! ❤

Thanks coach!

My avoidant Ex indirect direct approach is hilarious, I have done so much work on myself, I have never felt this confident & secure in myself, just as when I think he has ran out of things to contact me he comes up with another excuse to reach out. One message was even asking about my dads cat 😅

Have questions about your situation? Book a coaching with me at AskCraig.net

Seems my FA GF breaks up with me What seems like every other week or once a month. Often for petty, trivial nonsense. She gives me the silent Treatment for days/weeks. It can last upwards of a month plus sometimes. I honestly think it’s her fear of getting too close, it’s always after we get very close or something major is about to happen.

Sounds very similar to what I’ve been going through with my ex!

Ugh. I hope so. Anxious Avoidant scarred

They miss how you make them feel in the moment yeh miss you as a person caring loving loyal who can give n show healthy LOVE No

My ex got engaged 4 months after dating a guy long distance, which was only 6 months after our breakup. Fairly certain she was avoidant based off of the descriptions.

Today is being a hard day on NC. Its cold and dark, Im feeling lonely because of the weather. My case is similar with many on the site, we broke up 2 months ago and in the same day I started the work. I did the work on the past and got my other ex calling and crying over the phone because he missed me after 3 months. It took me around a year to make him understand that I was too happy to take him back 😂. Today is being much more harder because although I feel safe and much more confident with my power. When we broke up I made a power movement that caused him to block me everywhere and since them he is acting as if I did much more harm than good for him, like if Im toxic. On reality I was scared and crying over being abandoned by my best friend who I also platonic loved for almost 3 months. I know that he also loved me deeply but it was also scared of the responsibilities of admiting that to himself. Friends never understood why he didnt take the move and why he didnt let me go when I was starting to get interested in other guys. Im blocked, I wouldnt break no contact even if I wasnt, but Im sad. I know its works from experience on the past, this dont make me less sad.

Is an avoidant considered a narcissist? My ex was like an avoidant but was also verbally hurtful. Fed off my triggers... Like he enjoyed saying things to me that he knew would hurt me... Loved to mind f me. I don't get it... Loved ghosting me. Told me he loves who I am and loves being in my presence but he couldn't reciprocate his feelings. But then he told me he loved me numerous times... On off on off. Now we're no contact and I realize he is toxic. Trying to move on. Getting a bit easier. Lesson was a blessing...

Coach Craig, Can you make a video on the topic of age difference in relationships? Or how does age impacts their actions while being an avoidant.

If is struggling with his issues,why he is going with one another woman 🤔😳?Very confusing 😳

Ive been in no contact for two months now. We were broken up a month before i moved out. I know she monkey branched to another person in less than a month. But she kept up a few pictures of us and ones of my kids. But deleted the most recent ones. Its weird to me. Very hard to understand an avoidant and someone with childhood trauma.

Recently broken up with person here... One of the main issues is that I have problems with communication. I clam up during important conversations and try to avoid speaking because I find it negative or maybe even hurtful to the other person, which pushed my girlfriend away because it's hard to intimate with a partner who can't communicate... We got along really well and the relationship was a really amazing but my silence hurt her, and I've found that AVOIDING important conversations doesn't make them disappear. I'm wondering how I can become a better communicator? I'm currently in no contact and heartbroken.....

Craig! Should I break NC if I found out my ex broke her ankle?

My FA ex said he doesn’t have the time that I require and couldn’t meet my needs. I felt like I was stressing myself and him out. During our breakup he told me he still loved me, I’m hoping he was being honest

Will my avoidant ex come back after I said bad things to him and there were misunderstandings and I break no contact?

Exactly what my ex felt and said.... that he can't do much when i ask for better communication n time😓, and over the time idk how i become so anxious of all theses that i myself start feeling I'm too much dependent on his moods....but eventually before i could confess all this....he left me saying he can't match to my needs and leaving was his best solution he could think of💔😓. Mine was a long distance relationship of 9 yrs😔

Hey coach do you record your Skype sessions to reference in future follow up calls?

How can I get in contact with you

I don't think so. He broke up with me (2 months relationship) and he's back on dating apps, looking for greener grass. 3 months of NC, I know he's not coming back. I miss him but I will not reach out

Hello, I need advice. I’ve been no contact with my ex for 3 months right after he broke up with me. We had a really great relationship but I wasn’t the best at communication and he couldn‘t do it anymore. Now I found something in my home which I bought for him and we also thought was lost. I’m thinking of giving it back to him (putting it in his mailbox without a note or anything. Do you guys think that’s a good idea or is that breaking no contact? I hope that maybe this will get us talking again

Wait for your or his birthday, he broke up so you need to give him space, just my 2 cents

First

My Wife of 2 Years left me 3 months ago after meeting someone threw a Mutual Friend..A week after Meeting this Individual She Wanted a Separation and moved in with this Person.. 2 weeks later they moved 2 hours away with her new significant others Parents.. it seems this relationship is very Co Dependent.. She barely contacts me and doesn't have contact with our child or her other child who stays with her Mother.. When she talks to her Mother this Individual has to be right there.. Same with me.. Her Mother says it's like a few past relationships she had were the other individual was very controlling and right there on everything.. I can barely have a moment with my Wife and child..I've done partial no contact.. Obviously with a Child it's hard.. I just try and Voice what's going on and keep it short & sweet.. She doesn't seem Happy but we can't talk.. I'm getting to a point we're I'm getting to a good space.. And I'm really making good changes in things within.. Communicating skills & Emotionally.. Things I knew I needed to work on.. and things she has mentioned in the past.. I've mentioned that I'm working at some things.. She said I don't see it.. I said you can't if your not here or present when I use thse new skills I've learned day to day.. It's sad seeing her Stuck.. When she claimed she felt stuck with me.. Funny how time and distance changes things.

This story is exactly how my ex broke up with me 🥲😪