You can find additional content with Laura on our Substack at widerlenspod.com along with bonus content with other guests, discussion posts and resources, and information on ways to support the show. Please, also remember to like and subscribe right here on RU-vid! Thank you so much!
Thanks Sasha for having me on. I think it turned out great and I'm glad we could get so deep into the creativity and personality aspects of gender confused girls. Also, it was refreshing to focus the whole conversation on other factors instead of the usual transition-detransition timeline. All will be explored deeply in my upcoming memoir which now has a title Quirky Not Queer, Surviving the Trans Cult :)
We are not a cult or an ideology, a delusion, a fantasy or any other derogatory term you wish to use to erase us. We are human just like anyone and I can see through your inability to admit your responsibility in whatever mistake you made and the deep resentment that you are taking out on us with anti-trans ideology.
You are such an articulate speaker, writer and creative artist Laura. So glad to hear your observations on the natural personality quirks that noticibly exsist in young people who get steered into conceptualizing themselves as "trans" or "non binary". These online "arts" spaces and gaming spaces did seem to be heavily populated with TRA's posing as young artists or gamers who introduced these concepts in the online space. It was clear to see how a quirky young persons creativity can easily get directed towards undergoing destructive body modification rather than pursuing their artistic talents and abilities in other more constructive ways.
@@biancawilloughby9980 But the gender-affirming model says that anyone who feels trans at any time for any reason is trans. So wasn't Laura trans when she felt trans? Who are you to claim she wasn't? You're saying she's responsible for any mistakes she made? It seems like you're not very affirming. :-)
@@biancawilloughby9980 Indeed, people in cults, ideologically indoctrinated, or suffering from delusions and fantasies are humans like anyone else and deserve compassion!
What an intelligent young woman. Laura is a delight and offers nuance, insight and reflection on the gender juggernaut. She is a force to be reckoned and I so appreciate what she offers the young and parents alike. Great conversation.
In regard to traumatic events that would be good, but I like trauma because it means "wound" and I certainly have brain damage in the form of PTSD. @@lisasalamonecoaching
@@LauraBeckerReal Yeah, I thought that was interesting when you mentioned PTSD and brain damage. I hadn’t heard that before and will have to explore this further. Your voice, perspective and input is important and greatly appreciated.
It is not being presented as what it actually is. It is extreme body modification presented as a medical/surgical treatment to a psychological, societal condition.
Living in the Twin Cities in Minnesota…. Was embedded in this subculture for 20 plus years, within the arts communities, poly communities and rebel/punk/street people (anarchists). Yeah, the amount of insanity, paranoia and unbelievable tribal hatred of others astounded me and convinced me to get out and never return. Most of these folk also happily believed the very people they despised, in regards to the Covid pandemic. The professionals, corporations, government agencies and “experts”. It truly saddened me. Scarily real fear based mentalities and pure fanatical paranoia around politics and race/gender “social justice”.
Wow, she describes me! I'm 43, and I have always said that if I was young today I would definitly be trans. I hope seeing this can help parents out there!
Karlyn borsenko is doing a study of queer theory on her channel..my neighbor is someone who transed a couple years ago did not change a thing about her appearance and shes in a long term relationship with a man all of this is so bizarre .. thank you for your videos ...
I'm a geeky artist gal. Over 20 of my female artist friends have hopped onto this ideology. Some of them have become gravely ill from taking testosterone (colon cancer & heart disease...in their 20's). My heart aches for them, constantly, because they are wonderful, talented young women who are hurting and who have been sucked in by a deeply evil ideology that violates every facet of the Hippocratic oath. Thank you so much for this video. Thank you, Laura, for your bravery in speaking out. The more we speak out, the easier ending this insanity will be.
This is fantastic. The archetype model is spot on and why so many of us parents bond over how similar our girls’ stories are. Great episode here. I’d love to see this archetype more fully fleshed out and documented somewhere!!!
Back in my day "traumatic childhood" meant things like being beaten with the cord or other items, burnt with cigarettes, starved, s*** abuse, things like that. Not "my parents yelled that me", even if that yelling was because they just couldn't emotionally regulate. Now apparently _everyone_ was abused and has a "complex" trauma, because their parents weren't 100% perfect... But when everyone has "trauma", what about the kids who had _really_ traumatic childhoods? I remember in my class in elementary school was a girl who's farther was an alcoholic and once her both parents came to school and he started violently choking the mother in front of class of 8 yr olds. Just imagine what must have been at home🤯. Now, _that_ family situation _is_ trauma. It's truly terrifying. But fortunately, I don't think that's too common. And I don't think that's most people claiming "childhood trauma" have that type of experience.
I see your point, but I happen to know that Laura’s trauma is “real trauma.” She probably just didn’t want to belabor and rehash the details in this particular interview. She has spoken in more detail about it in other places.
@@MysticMom75 Fair point. I guess I'm just a bit tired/triggered from hearing how everyone has "trauma" now, but you're right, I have no way of nothing Laura's particular history so that was a bit unfair to generalize/assume on my part.
Back in your day individuals like my dad were experiencing abuse that led to generational trauma repeated in my generation. Now it's being discussed. Gen X is wary to address the pain that they've inflicted on their children due to not understanding abuse in their childhoods.
It's generally not socially favorable to comment such things on victim's interviews. For future reference, I would not say these things when you have no idea what's going on. Really bad form. @@joane24
I'm hoping that Helen Joyce weighs in with the results of her analysis of fan-fiction. Which will probably be along the line of: "It's just too ticklish to be a girl, so I'll read fujo/BL/YAOI material in which I can be fully involved in the boy-love emotions . . .WITHOUT projecting myself into a female character." I have to emphasize: the smart, quirky girls (& smart, quirky boys) are precisely the ones who are going to come up with BETTER ways to be girls & boys, and women and men, out of their distaste for the stale roles offered them . . . but only if they can be nurtured and distracted from their teenage moments of distaste and awkwardness. It's not a matter of "saving them" so that they can act out how "how-to-date-properly!" rituals from 1950's etiquette books. It's a matter of them saving us, by their creativity, and showing us how to be men & women in the 21st C.
Laura, your voice is not masculine. How did that happen if you took testosterone? Did your voice not change? Does it get less deep after not taking testosterone for a while?
My voice was permanently lowered from testosterone. It used to be quite high. It didn't lower as much as some other women because I wasn't on it as long. But it's also a crap shoot when the lowering will occur. I was lucky it didn't get any lower than it did.
Why are you using luring words like smart and quirky. Just state your reasons to be involved. Do you have kids, is it a money thing. I don’t trust this sudden interest.
Her description, applies noticibly, to a wide swath of recent young people who tend to visit specific online communities of artists and other creatives as well as gaming and pro ana and pro cutting online discussion forums, where adult TRA's have been actively promoting trans and gender theory. It does seem that creative and open young people are targetted for their unique vulnerability to this ideology.
Also, want to add that I think yaoi and gay fan fiction written by women for women seems to play a big factor! I’ve known this for years, but it’s not being said enough
@@KramRemin😂😂 idk why Helen did that on a train, but I know full well what she was researching and was so glad she finally came to this conclusion. I was so pissed to learn the activists tried to make it out that she was consuming “minor porn” 🙄 The fact they put it on blast like that put more attention to the fact that Helen was doing research to further explain the social contagion. Kinda shot themselves in the foot there. I’ve known the yaoi thing for years now. I saw it a lot in the 2000s in cosplay
Right? These people must have an *intense need* that you haven't experienced. Since you are a woman, not a man, that makes sense! The people who *do* want to do this have had a different experience than you - it's possible they have different feelings than you, different tastes than you, different needs than you - so they do not feel that it is sad or wrong. Their experience is that they have growths on their body that they do not need and that, in fact, hurt them. It would be strange for you to insist that they live in pain because *your* experience of having breasts was nice. It's sort of like if I said that you had to eat spicy hot sauce every day, because it's *my* favorite food, I don't care if it makes you sick and you are allergic to peppers, it's my favorite food so you must love it too! You are wrong about getting sick, because I don't get sick! That would be just...silly. So I'm sure you don't think that, right? :)
@@keladry12 But your healthy body is part of you, not some thing you can choose to have or not to have. Can you be allergic to yourself? That's what you're proposing, and while I can understand the logic of it to some extent, I also know as an adult that there were a million things I had to do that I hated. Some of them I still hate. But I've learned how to deal with my disgust for all the annoying, monotonous, and pointless-seeming things I have to do as an adult because they need to get done. It's a very childish way of thinking if you believe that "if I only had this medical procedure, then I'd love myself." When does it stop? Unless you want to be miserable for the rest of your life, you need to learn how to love yourself, breasts and all.
@@keladry12 Or maybe the Blessed Virgin is spiritually smiting these girls to purify their souls on the path to sainthood? Thankfully such metaphysical beliefs are no longer taken seriously by responsible medical practitioners. It's my sincere hope that the same happens to yours someday.
My mother had breast cancer and also had a radical mastectomy. I was in 5th grade. The surgery physically affected my mother for the rest of her life. Now my daughter can’t wait to have her breast removed.
I am listening here and SEE all my female quirky students. LAURA WE NEED YOUR VOICE. I have followed your journey through Buck Angel's interview with you. I think so. You are a warrior and such a BEAUTIFUL female. 😊
I also have a narcissist father. LAURA I felt that pain. I actually have to take care of that same man in his older age. So I have to presently living with my tormentor. I have been seeing a therapist to get through it.
Thank you this is a great episode from yet another wonderful perspective. I’ve heard about Laura for some time and read her amazing essay this morning too. Thank you for nailing it again.
My 13-year-old is quirky, sensitive, very artistic, empathetic. Going into shutdowns, she never questioned being a girl and halfway through, started to insist that she’s a boy. Out of the blue, she started having sensory issues like not wanting to be hugged, loud sounds bothering her, etc. She seemed to just disappear into herself and is now very quiet. She moves very robotically now and doesn’t even walk like she used to. This last point is one that none of her doctors or therapists have addressed yet. She was diagnosed with ADHD last year. How does a child out of the blue start to display these types of issues?
My daughter was exactly the same. I do think some sensory and body sensitivity can arise is puberty. But it’s also fed online. Girls being encouraged to shower with the lights off and such. My daughter is now 17 and has dropped most of this though she still has some of the issues remaining. Time and maturity does wonders. Keep your daughter close. Buy her time, get her off social media, and she will hopefully find her way back to herself. 🙏
@@nocontabanconlasmadres4457 the older they get the harder it is. Two things we did … get her a Gabb phone instead of an iPhone. Put a charging station in a central place in the house for overnight. Fill her time with other things. My daughter and I took a pottery class together. You can’t be on social media when you’re hands are full of clay. It’s hard though, trust me, I know.
@@nocontabanconlasmadres4457I don't have a 16-year-old (my daughter is 21), but I've heard that getting kids back to enjoying nature experiences is important. So, hiking, camping, gardening, and even just laying in the grass 15 minutes a day (with no cell phone!) can be helpful. Also, connecting with animals, maybe volunteering once a week at an animal shelter? I think we have to get our kids back in their bodies by encouraging them to do physical things that they love, like dance classes, martial arts, sports, going to a climbing gym, or whatever else they might like to do physically. That's what I'm suggesting to my daughter. Good luck.
@@nocontabanconlasmadres4457I don't have a 16-year-old (my daughter is 21), but I think we have to get our kids back to nature so they can reground themselves in their bodies. Encouraging hiking, gardening, camping, or even just laying in the grass 15 minutes a day (with no cell phone!) I've heard can be very beneficial. Connecting with animals will also do this. Maybe volunteering once a week at an animal shelter? Also doing something physical at least once a week that they really love, like dance classes, martial arts, a rock climbing gym, sports, or whatever else are things I've heard would be good, too. Good luck.
Something I have observed is the connection between autism in women and PCOS. These conditions are also higher among FTM and lesbians than the general female population. My own theory is that some experience what I would describe as a hormonal storm somewhere just before puberty and it causes a shift in gender identity or sexual orientation. I believe that some forms of autism are endocrine disorders first with neurological effects. I know there have been studies on this but I think there needs to be more research in this area.
Agreed. I had an art professor while I was studying fine arts argue with me that women could never be great artists because they could give birth. Very stupid man. We argued about it for two years. Neither of us ever changed the other’s view. Lol.
I have fell in love and gone through feelings of infatuation, desire, anxiety and depression WITHOUT understanding that I was in LOVE with a woman. I did not understand what was going on with myself and the others did not understand that either. Internalized homophobia let to it. - late bloomer
It is interesting how some groups really love to flatter themselves by saying, “they often are very cerebral and they gravitate towards this.” There are other words that are probably more realistically inserted for cerebral that have to do with poor mental health. The attribution to being cerebral is more accurately a coping mechanism for their insecurity.
this describes me and all my desisted/still trans identified female friends so well. absolutely scary to think how similar we all were and fell for the same lie.
WOW! Laura you are an inspiration. Thank you for sharing this. The kindness and genuine compassion for struggling young people radiates from you both. ❤ Keep fighting the good fight!
I have been searcing as a parent for the whys and blamed myself .... this is so helpful to me to truly undetstand this. My child fots everything your saying! THANK U!
@@roryteal5940 I have no reason to deny that some countries and communities have found perverse delight in controlling others based on suspicion of carrying the virus, but I wouldn't say Christofascism is less harmful. If anything it makes ordinary levels of stalking and coercive control appear normal in comparison, potentially deepening the internalization of things which might be processed in open, social environments. It can make patriarchally controlled families seem like a fun summer camp. I'd say they create vicious feedback loops.
@@robertmarshall2502 It's an amplified version of Christian nationalism. In the US, separation between church and state is always being staged as an ever finer and finer line, such that interests consolidate heavily around that narrative and prescribe privatized answers for people. There's so much damage done that in fact groups like FAIR and GENSPECT and Reality's Last Stand will indeed seem to be the saviors of independent choices and thinking, when in fact they're attached to front groups who can afford to play both (and indeed any) sides. I'm not saying "wokeness" isn't pernicious, but it's been privatized and corrupted and has abandoned those it claims to have served. Anti-wokeness will also abandon those it claims to serve -- the moment it's no longer politically and/or financially useful. Christofascism's place in all of this is based in promising the majority that the *door which leads back to home* is closing, in very specific ways. When people are insecure, we do tend to mirror each other's predominant characteristics and patriarchal tendencies (even if they bear the facade of being "diverse") are simply going to be part of that meltdown, IMO.
I would love to know if you have resources for parents struggling to navigate this when trying to be with our child who a discussion in just not possible.
Sasha and Stella both have parent support groups. The links are in the show notes and more information can also be found on our website at widerlenspod.com. Also, you can check out genspect which has a number of guides on their website. And our book "When Kids Say They're Trans" is also a great resource. Our heart is truly with you and all the parents struggling with this.
