Ep. 338 | The Loneliness Epidemic (with  

So true. My husband and I have been together for 40 years. Divorced friends have asked me how? I have told them, it is a choice and I choose to love him. I have fallen in and out of love many times with him, however he is my best friend and I will always like him as the person he is.

People are lonely because we communicate differently now due to social media. You can have 500 friends but none of them will stop by my house today to say hi. In fact, these days people consider it rude to stop by someone's house unannounced, when 30 years ago, even 20 years ago, I didn't feel like I was invading someone's space if I just dropped by to say hi. Same with calling, it's all gone to text. A horrible and cold way to communicate.

I love doing things on my own.. Bushwalking, movies, road trips... I could ask a friend/family member to join me, but I like being alone. I'm alone - not lonely.

Looking for open-minded (intentional) people vs. like-minded people. Now that's an idea 💁‍♀️

If you find something meaningful in this life , one won't be so lonely.

Meet Up groups was the first thing that I thought of. So glad to see you mention it. Now about that choosing to stay and love section. I was married for 25 years. At about the 15 year mark my husband stopped treating me as if I mattered. I stuck it out another 10 years trying to make it work. It didn't work and finally I valued myself enough to leave. Best decision I ever made. So, yes it's great if you both choose love but when both don't then don't sell your life short. Give it a strong effort then move on. I should have left 5 years earlier.

Very very interesting, guys. I just wanna add that nothing has made me more powerful than learning to be alone. I've had unforgettable moments in amazing company and by myself as well. Now that I'm 50 I'm in great harmony on my own and I feel connected to a lot of friends alike, even if I don't see them half as much as I would like to. ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Always check your bills! Always check your grocery store receipt. Whole Foods charged me $2.79/lb for lentils recently. I walked right back into the store because lentils are $2.49/lb. When Whole Foods makes a mistake on their charge, they reverse the charge and you get the item for FREE! My mom taught me well! No one cares about your money as much as You Do!

Thank Minimalists and Delony. You helped simplify my life and maximize it.

As soon as it comes out of my mouth..."I should..." STOP! 🧡

I went through a breakup in August 2019. By January 2020 I was feeling a lot of pressure to put myself “back out there” and socialize even though I didn’t really want to. When the lockdowns happened I was actually relieved that I didn’t have to go out. I was very content staying home and enjoying my alone time. It gave me the time I needed to process my breakup, rediscover myself and choose my needs before any one else’s.

Thank you for the light-hearted discussion of real-life challenges. I have had many "ah-ha" moments of my personality in just the first 15 mins of this episode. Understanding myself with grace and love. ❤🙌

The world can be quite loud & stupid - my favorite place to be is my craft room! Also, I move in a totally different time reality than my friends - I enjoy the times when we get together & I enjoy my own company.

I choose my husband everyday. It's such a blessing to have a partner you love. We've been together 5 years now ❤️ be thankful! 🙏

I’ve spent a lifetime being by myself and enjoying my own company, doing whatever I feel like doing, part of this is because I’m an introvert and never having had the self confidence to mix with others, the other part is due to having a social anxiety condition that’s been so tough to break away from. Living like this for so long now I never really know which part of my life is the pleasure of being alone, but not lonely and which part is me trying to deal with the anxiety and avoiding social situations. Really enjoyed this episode, thanks!

I always hear impeccable vocabulary and I have found one to offer back! This group is the most powerful didactic inspiration in my life. Thank you for offering so much in my world.

Excellent insights regarding the "taking calls! I've been listening for a couple of weeks now, and am letting go of many unnecessary things... I now realize that things don't define me! I do, by how I value myself, family, and all of the other humans that I come in contact with. Love the content, and I am grateful for the new found freedom I'm experiencing!

Thank you, Minimalists and Dr Deloney. Great wisdom as usual. I walk away always learning and new insight. I used to have tons of friends as I get older notice how people aren't so friendly like years ago. I can have days I feel alone but not lonely. It's what I do with those days make such a difference. I am thankful for you all, feels like I am visiting, but there are days quiet is amazing. But I am found that people enjoy getting phone calls from me , but to get return calls doesn't happen. Yet they get mad and complain when no one calls. After learning from all, I told these people one day I said the problem isn't me, The problem is you would like to complain, which is what I told my friends and not reciprocate. You can't just expect everybody to reach too. You need to pour out other people as well. They actually were thankful that was brought to light. I have told these friends to listen to both of you and they will find change in their lives. But I also have realized i'm not taking on a responsibility that isn't mine to do. I call these friends I check on them, but when I see them post something or when I hear them get irritated. I don't jump in like I used because I realized I was carrying aload that was never mind to carry. These three people live out of state so I don't even get to hang out with them. But I realized and have shared with them when you're so caught up and being lonely and miserable. No one wants to hang around with you. So I challenged them just like I get challenged look at ourselves see what we need to change. I think when we're willing to learn everyday is like going to a day of schooling. That makes a world a beautiful place. I'm gonna pass on the information that you shared to the people. I know that live out of state and see if it will help them

Joshua's table analogy of Like, love, and lust makes complete sense. Dr. John Delony, I appreciate "my wife thinks I'm a lot." I realize now, that I can be a lot in my relationships, and that's ok. Ryan "we all need some security and certainty" YES. 💯

John telling the predators not to screw this app up for the rest of us kills me. XD Another great episode!

I had at least 4 or 5 different friends mention how lonely they were after the lockdown. They were all single and endlessly scrolling on tinder. A few of them even mentioned the word "desperate" for a partner. And all were very smart attractive people with tons of social media friends.

Today is 9 June 2022. I finally listed to this podcast. I know why I never delete them, even if I fall behind. The information, happiness, jocularity and emotion that is expressed was incredible. Thanks for this!

12 pm new episode. The fastest I refreshed. GREETINGS FROM POLAND 👍

Don't outsource your life. BAM! Love it

Great episodes! I really like that you often have on people from Ramsey! There’s always a great exchange of ideas between you two and them 😊

My dad used to tell me n my brother; I always love you, but sometimes I just don't like you

Me hubby and I met at a department store at 17 and 19 .40 years ago. Going on our 34 anniversary next day. Kids all grown.

From one Stacy to Another It's highly likely that she sees her "plethora of acquaintances" as meaning-less connections; and, is looking to shore up a more quality group of like-minded friends. It's about not flowing with what comes our way, due to region; rather, pursuing our true interests and finding folks that we have real, authentic connections with---a common ground. What are her interests? ...hobbies? ...education? Where would she prefer to hang out? The local music shop, festivals; the library, college; farms and nurseries; old folks homes and churches? The common ground of personal interest will create the natural connection.

Thank you guys for making these videos/podcasts. We really appreciate it! You say what others subconsciously think more often than not.

LOVE your mission of educating middle school and high school students in Dayton, Ohio. VALUABLE and meaningful time helping others. I couldn't relate to high school economics, it was missing the real-life examples. No wonder so many of us (especially me) have entered the real world with financial challenges wondering...what happened?

Sending love from the 🇵🇭 love your podcasts and videos ❤️ I appreciate you guys so much 💟

Great episode, thank you guys :) love you.

Such a good episode!

Wow. That would be great to offer financial training to the people of Dayton Ohio. What a great idea!

I'm 36 I put a lot of self worth into if I was in a relationship, my past relationships did not work out ive been used and cheated on. I find myself very lonely especially when I'm in a empty house, it seems with social media and dating apps has made people disposable in a way. At the moment I'm trying to work out what I'm going to do in the aspect of being single can't afford to buy a property on my own and I want to grow, but with society being designed for couples and not single in a lot of aspects makes things a lot harder. Everyone that I know are in relationships have kids etc, i really want someone to grow with. Now a days my time is majority is working and keeping fit looking after myself I'm always looking forward but I seems to struggle at times on and off with seeing majority of relationships around me.

Hi minimalists! I noticed that you seemed to think Stacey was wondering how many friends she should have and/or felt compelled by someone else to reduce her friend count. I wonder if Stacey could have meant that SHE wants to have fewer friends. I personally feel overwhelmed by the number of connections I have and people I love. I don't want to cut ties with any of these people but I also feel exhausted when I fill my schedule with social engagements. What would you say to someone who wants to have fewer obligations but loves the friends they have?

Gratitude club! Thanks John!

I am most lonely around people.

I still think dr. John needs to learn about what introverts are. I did like what John said on this episode though and I agree with most. I disagree when you said about the person that watches tv every night until pass out is bad for some people. I did have one lady that we met every day while our kids played and I will admit it was awesome and now she’s gone. It completed my life, meaning I enjoyed life by myself doing things by myself all day. Ounce she left, that one hour messed with the rest of my day. I needed that hour of talk to complete the rest of my day by my self. Really interesting. I’m getting by right now because I remember when I was suicidal 15 years ago and I’m nowhere near that bad now. 15 years ago I got out of a mental state of being suicidal every day to a snap of the fingers where I was thriving in life as a introvert. Something got me out of being suicidal, not a person.

I'm 36 I've been alone the whole time. My brain feels cold. I was shunned since elementary found two friend that turned out to drink and do coke. After that I just didn't know how to hang with people.

People have failed me so many times. Im having a hard time trusting again

Great episode guys ❤❤ I think the Pandemic has really changed the way we interact with other ppl as well. That n how ppl use technology to communicate with each other could be a whole podcast 😀😀

There's a HUGE difference between being lonely and being in solitude! Loneliness is PAINFUL Solitude is PEACE. Learn the difference. When you are alone and are enjoying your home, are enjoying the cup of coffee and book that your reading, are enjoying pampering yourself, are enjoying working on your home , are grateful for everything you have and don't feel lack of anything...that is solitude. You enjoy your time with yourself. Loneliness is when you have a wonderful story to tell and you come home and there's no one there and ohh how you wish there was. Or how you treat people like you want to be treated so you call, and you text, and you comment, and you share, and you invite but nobody does these for you and you notice and it hurts. When you see all these happy couples...so you try to be proactive and get out there to meet new people in hopes of finding a mate and... nothing. And it hurts. When you are home and you feel the walls closing in and it suffocate the breath out of you. When you walk through your home touching the walls... just to feel something touching you back. That's painful.

Meetup is the bomb

"What are your bare necessities to feel secure."

Most likely there are as many aspects to being lonely as there are people. Many will love things while using people, in place of loving people while using things. This is a great environment for predatory people. With 80% of people's interactions being online or ways other than face to face in person, this also adds to people's feelings of isolation. With the aftermath of what has been going on since 2019, people working from home or losing employment, it adds to the level of stress, worldwide.

The older I get the easier a time I have making new friends.

Your all very impressive!!!

Yup it is very real not just for adults, but children also. My daughter can't have any friends to visit. One had got covid twice , he never knew cuz he had no symptoms. These are special needs adults.

If I saw you in public I'd probably just be too shy to say hi🤷. It's not that I don't care that it's you. At least that's how I've acted when seeing elite runners at races. There's a good change I'd get up the courage with you two now that I think about it, I've read your books, watched tons of videos, and I'm confident you'd appreciate meeting someone who has benefited from your content, as opposed to annoyed (can you tell from my comment that I also had a more difficult than average childhood?🤣).

What is the name and artist of the song at the very end “ every little thing “?

I’m an istj also. Cool.

Also. Bumble has a platonic side for friendships!

33:33 lead leg #Push is the mantra of human harvesting. 😪😪😪

Check out the comedian John Crist. He is hysterical.

Josh, found you in a video today walking across the beach: ru-vid.com/video/%D0%B2%D0%B8%D0%B4%D0%B5%D0%BE-RH5XrA8QWoI.html around 5:40

401k collapsed Monday. ✓✓✓

Walk down Ur street; make friends

In the words of Albert ellis, don't go shoulding all over yourself!

Strip club joke @ 4:27 🤮

Toastmasters. you will make friends there - and learn cool stuff.