Our stories are very similar. I understand that feeling of not being loved or being safe period or being taken care of. I've lived on my own since I was 16 years old. Because my father divorced my mother. She broke down and moved almost clear across the country. And then my father moved in with his mistress and told me that it was his time for happiness in life. Somehow through God's grace I made it through. I had to put myself through high school and college without any parental or even sibling help. I'm 51 years old now and when I tell people my story they are shocked. But God was always with me as He is now. I am so grateful that I am a full and loving and born again relationship with my God and Saviour. Bless you Sister for sharing your story it's good to know I'm not totally alone.
My mother wanted me dead. She always said, "She wished abortion had been legal, so I could have never been. I took care of her until she died . All the while being hated for merely existing
As a child of an alcoholic, abusive environment, your testimony really spoke to me. Thank you. may you be blessed in your marriage and your future life. God is the only reason I am where I am today. I have a wonderful marriage two children and six grandchildren. I've maintained these relationships through my relationship with God.
When I was 23 weeks pregnant, I lost my baby boy. It had been a difficult pregnancy and while everyone was so excited, I had been growing sicker every day. To save my life, I went into labor and I held my baby boy and his little heart slowed down and he stopped breathing.He has a perfect little nose and 10 fingers and 10 toes and he died. More than anything, I felt betrayed. I had been a Christian since I could talk. I prayed and confessed healing over my life. I had anointed myself with oil. I had other people, better stronger Christians, praying. All for nothing. My faith felt like it had been stabbed 100 times. But then I was invited to a small group for infant loss and we started reading your book. You have shown me a side of God that I had forgotten about. I started seeing Father God as one who begs us to question Him. To bring Him our laments. To wrestle with Him. He stopped being so distant and started being the God who cried when I cried. Being around so many Christians, everyone wanted to slap a saying or "scripture band-aid" on my son's death. I wanted to slap them. YOU CAN'T FIX this!!!! Please stop trying!!! Your story, your book has shown me a path through this valley of death. It was only when you helped me stop coping that I started healing. Thank you so much.
Cherie Reed: My sweet lady, GOD has given you a powerful testimony, opportunity, and great strength. I pray that you will follow our LORD Jesus as He guides you to touch lives with your experience. Live Acts 17.... and turn the world upside down🎵🌹🎵
I'm so thankful for the healing you received in the Lord! I had 2 miscarriages and often people's words were more hurtful than helpful, "You can try again", "Oh yeah, my wife had a miscarriage, you'll be fine". I also felt betrayed by God and was very angry with him. I kept hurling that anger at him and he would always respond with love and kindness. I have 3 wonderful kids now that have been such a blessing! And I know part of the reason I went through those miscarriages was so that I could feel mercy towards those who've had an abortion. If the guilt and pain over an accidental miscarriage was so great, I can't even imagine what those women feel when they realize what they've done. Only through the Lord can we all find healing.
Oh my gosh! I can identify with so much and as I listen I think back and now know that God had His hand on me during the storm like you had. Both my parents died from alcoholism and I swore I'd never drink but I ended up the the same boat but at 21 I realized that I was heading down the same path and surrendered to rehab and AA. I'm sober and drug free for 40 years. But for the grace of God ! I still struggle with shame and guilt and thoughts of ending my life but try my best to keep my eyes on our awesome Savior. God bless you for sharing your testimony!
One of the best one of these films I've seen. We are all products of our past. You can't just "out the past behind you." It will come clawing its way out. And Jesus, the healer of the broken-hearted, the one who can set you free of your captivity, is always knocking on the door and waiting for us to let Him in and do what only He can do. Beautiful story and beautiful heart of running to God.
Thank you Esther for sharing your testimony. I can relate on so many levels. Always having it together, yet not really. If only people knew. Your lamenting book was just what I needed. It was time to grieve for how horrible I was treated and not ever feeling loved. And seeking Abba Yahweh for comfort. Realizing too that He was always there. Realizing that we have the power to break generational curses and have victory over the enemy. You are a precious daughter of the Most High and I thank you for loving Him and seeking His glory. Psalms 27:10 10 When my father and my mother forsake me, Then the Lord will take care of me.
Wow, powerful. I didn't have to deal with an abusive father, but a very absent father. This just hit home. While there are many differences, there were also a lot of similarities. Esther, thank you so much for your bravery to share your story. So glad you surrendered this to God. It's it so awesome when we give him our battles and He reminds us that He never left us? Thank you again for sharing!
Pain is pain, Taneah. Absent is very painful, too! I am so sorry, and proud of your courage, too. God has been the very best father... I still can't believe He saved me. Bless you, sis.
Wow what a powerful witness you have. To trust the Lord in the dark and face the very things that felt as though they would overtake you is true bravery. God bless you, Esther
What a powerful testimony of God intervening in our life, letting Him come in and change the picture on the inside of us Of who he really is a Good father and see yourself the way he see us accepted in the beloved and we are his precious treasure. He gave all that he had to purchase us. Thanks for sharing your story. Sis God bless you.
Esther, you are the definition of a warrior. I can only imagine how strong you were forced to be after all of this. I'm so glad you were able to find God in all of this tragedy
Dear Esther. Your testimony brings me so much hope for PEACE. You are a living example how God gives peace even in extremly difficult situations. Thank you for honestly sharing and with that encouraging all of us to find comfort in the Lord. And that is my prayer: That many people would hear your story and would be encouraged to seek the Lord in any situation they are facing. Thank you! Blessings from Slovenia.
Wow Esther, God is so good. Thank you for sharing your testimony. I'd like to share this with our middle school youth as I feel your story resonates very closely with many of theirs.
You are a very strong woman! All along you have been strong and overcoming so much! Congratulations on finding God and feeling his peace and moving on from such a tough upbringing! You life has just begun! xo
RockinDwarves praise God! Through Jesus, she is an overcomes, because He loves her, and His love will never leave her, by the blood of the Lamb, the Word of her testimony, and not loving her own life in the face of death. (Romans 8:37, Revelation 12:11) Thank You for sharing about what God has done in your life. Sin and evil is real and I'm so sorry you went through that, but am glad that God is using your story to help others ❤ Don't ever lose hope or give up, be strong and courageous, God is with you, and will never leave you nor forsake you. “Haven’t I commanded you: be strong and courageous? Do not be afraid or discouraged, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”” Joshua 1:9 HCSB bible.com/72/jos.1.9.hcsb
Imagery friends are not only for children, adults in distress can benefit from them as well but remember, ultimately decency and goodness comes from within and thats why humanity is the only reality we have and my hope for you is that you will find the inner honesty to stand alone and recognise that humanity in itself can be beautiful without outside interference.
Jim Hawkins As one who has belief in the Creator, the Mighty One of the Bible, we almost agree. "Humanity is the only reality we have." I'd only add that God is also the only other reality. What were the two commandments Jesus gave that summed up the whole Law of the OT? Love your God with all your heart, mind, soul, and strength and the second is to love your neighbor as self. Love is not make-believe and can only be understood and reenacted in purity through its Source. The painting cannot define the Painter and the pot cannot define the Potter.
Ester, thank you for responding, Is it really possible to be commanded to love on the condition that hell awaits if we don't, this is totally immoral, it goes against human decency and thats my point, free will is inane, nobody can give it to you or tell you what to do with it. My frustration with religion is its effect of diminishing our basic humanity. There is nothing new in the ten commandants that wasn't practiced thousands of years earlier, except of course being told to love your god, is the absurdity not obvious and does it not show a removal from the reality of the real world we live in, which in my opinion is every good reason to take two steps back from and cast off superstition and let the light shine through.
Jim Hawkins The bible talks about religion too. True religion is helping the widows and the orphans. Toxic religion is helping the religious authority get its own desires, while they put uneccessary weight on people, hindering the people's individual walk with God, while the authority regards helping the common man as defiling themselves. It's a sick cycle. When David went to go fight Goliath, King Saul put his armor on David that was so big and heavy he could barely move let alone fight with it so he took it off. That armor is religion. David only needed a sling and a stone. Simple.
Ester, now that we have somewhat removed religion our next step is to remove the focus of religion, namely god. A book written in the bronze age by a group of anonymous authors written for superstitious bronze age people which can be interpreted multiple different ways dependent on what flavour you prefer is hardly a work inspired by a divine magician, no our own morality is far superior to that of the bible. Yes you can take some nice bits out of the dung heap but the stench remains. No need to look up when decency and goodness is all around you in the real world,
Jim Hawkins Well to be honest to say that the bible is a project of the bronze age is actually false. It was written over 1500 years and contains writing more recent than bronze age but mainstream knowledge would rather make a joke about it. In regards to its content and authorship, not only does it explain how to receive interpretation , but also 1 out of 4 verses is prophecy. No other group or work on earth can match that, including other belief systems. And with over 40 authors, almost every indiviual author is established by name and occupation. And I agree 100% its not written by a divine magician. The Almighty is much more than a magic show. In terms of morality, you're saying it's natural to love those that hate you? To bless those who physically abuse you? To forgive regardless of wrong? Going off of feelings is a terrible justification for morality.
I'm sorry ....your beautiful . been there ... it's not ok ....feel what you feel be strong... trust JESUS. .HE LOVEZ YOU YES THE LORDS EYES ARE WATCHING to n fro !bless you child
Esther thank you for sharing your story. After watching your video, the song "Theres Hope in Front of Me" by Danny Gokey came to mind. You should check it out if you don't already know it :)
esther I was friends with you as a child, and charlie also. you went to my birthday party at little ceasars on 15 mile and crooks plus I used to go over to your house and play with you guys cause my dad was friends with your dad
All these videos, well most all, have this moment where the person has this all of a sudden turning point, where God changes everything, and they get pulled into scripture and things just all of a sudden make sense...this has never happened to me. I believe in God yes, have for 30 years now, but not once has this magical moment ever happened where I'm at this point and go on camera now and tell my story. if anything the more time that goes on the weaker my faith gets, the less and less I hear from the Lord, the less scriptures mean anything...nothing seems to change or get better. I'm happy for these people, don't get me wrong, but I guess some of us just arnt meant to have that magical moment were it all makes sense and God cleanses us and we can hold our head high in the light. g
I hope you read my book, Randy. You'll see it wasn't one moment but a long walk of choosing God, after He had chosen me. I think the point is I stopped seeing it as God punishing me, and started seeing that He was broken for me... and therefore He could relate to me in my brokenness. He felt less removed when I considered how He was broken for me.
Esther Fleece well, i tried to read your book. And i just didnt connect with it. But im sure its a good read, and i apologize for the earlier comment. Im happy for you in your success and that you have a relationship with the lord. ;) god bless
Not trying to sound harsh or mean but yes God feels what we feel, he does love us. But what good is this when he doesn't help or comfort us? That is like seeing the homeless man and wishing him well, saying you feel for him, but going on your way and not doing anything.
That is not harsh or mean - it is a very honest question. Pain and suffering are topics every worldview - every person - has to come to grips with and answer. With Christianity - it all starts with our freedom to love God or not. The essence of love, is choice - we choose to love Him or not. Not loving Him is sin - and that sin hurts others as well as ourselves. But God loves us - chooses to love us - so much that he allows us to go through hard times in order to increase our love and dependence on Him. Think about not eating for a long time - maybe several days. How awesome is that bite of food when you start eating again - God's love is like that. When we hurt, when we go through pain and suffering, the awesomeness of God's love has more meaning and more power. At the time it seems arbitrary and unfair, but His love is never failing. He work ALL things for the good of those who love him. A short answer to a hard - but very fair question.
Hi Jonathan... you don't sound harsh or mean. I struggled with this for many years. It was only through perseverance that I could see years later God had not left me when I thought He had. I talk a little bit more about this in my book. For me it wasn't my circumstances changing. Thanks for the comment.
Jonathan Fisher God has given us everything we need. First right upon asking God/ JESUS for HIS HELP our prayers are answered. The Lord's Prayer...Oir Father who set in heaven hallowed be THY WILL...thy kingdom come thy will be done, on earth as it is in heaven...etc. OUR prayers are answered upon speaking them, don't forget the same with Adam and Eve...they were told not to eat from the tree in the center of the garden of Eden and, by the deceiver serpent they did eat the forbidden fruit....another thing, we have to remember with whom we battling with, EPHESIANS 6:12...and also when we approach God, how is OUR HEART...as an adult and a parent of our kids come to us asking for something and their attitude is negative, that's not going to make you render services until they show respect to you. As for your statement about the homeless, and less fortunate, Jesus has given all we need to survive. OUR world is filled with so much dispare, just like in the US, those in office have many different positions where they can hurt our economy or build it up to benefit all humanity. JESUS gave instructions for all to do as HE DID...He said the work we seen him do, WE do GREATER WORKS shall we do in HIS NAME. GOD BLESS YOU 😚
From the way it's presented, it sounds like her father was trying to reconnect before his death. It doesn't sound like a total victory, as we've been given the ministry of reconciliation and this man died alone, in his sins.
I think the God energy works in the same principles, the "law of attraction", the secret works. Ex- If you truly want something, say a good career, than you may say god help or me god listen, but did you just said that once and did nothing for achieving it?No, you have to work hard in the right direction and when you finally achieve the dream job you thank god all the time forgetting that at first you wanted it from your heart , you did all the hard work , overcame all the challenges ; making the law of attraction work from the very fist day when you desired it. You praise god for your success because you have been told all your life that your god created everything and you and other people's god's are fake. So this is how the mechanism is working for the past 2000 years. Anyways where was the damn god when ISIS was killing/ massacring Yazdis. Well , non of your concern right ?!, the god helped you after all, why should you care that there are many who are praying too but are in worse of misery than you !
