Expiration Date 

Soldier: “Good news, we’re not dying! We are going to live forever!” You’re right, Soldier. You’re going to live forever, in our hearts. RIP

"But you're good with ladies. Ones that can smell good, and can... read," Incredibly high bar here.

Emesis Blu: Horrors beyond a man’s comprehension Emesis Red:

red bread redemption

"So were fine as long as nobody teleports any bread." "Question." *Top 10 Moments Before Disaster*

“This is a bucket” *”Dear g o d”* “There’s more..” *”No”*

1:10 I love the detail on how the keypad for red also has the 1 worn out. Which means both teams number is 1,1,1,1

This is strangely wholesome when you realize Spy did all that training just to get his son to be himself and confident

I don’t know what Demoman did during those three days he thought were his last, but I guarantee that he doesn’t know either.

Well the Engineer did tell the soldier, “you can teleport as much bread as you like”. So he did

Love how at 1:25 Spy makes a joke. Then Scout tells him to go to hell. But as soon as spy is out of hearing range, scout laughs at spys joke. The dynamic of spy and scout being both rivals, father and son, co-workers, (somewhat) friends, and Horible people is amazingly entertaining to watch.

10:25 I love how Soldier question wasn’t even a question

Everyone’s worst fear is not being able to teleport bread

“We are going to live FOREVER!” In our hearts you will

I love how in the beginning the three loudest classes went on a stealth mission, scout can't shut up, soldier is very loud, and heavy's minigun reved up makes a lot of noise

Whoever made these is a rare and long extinct breed of animator. The quality, the lines, the story is insane for basically a financially unnecessary project like this. I wholeheartedly believe the team behind tf2 is comprised of some of the most talented, fearless and creative minds to ever grace the gaming scene.

"Let's see... we all use the teleporter, let's say, *6 times a day, times 4 years, minus we're not bread...* yes. 3 days. We all have three days to live." No wonder how medic lost his medical license.

I like how when soldier thinks they can’t teleport bread anymore his first instinct is to slam scout on a table and punch him

blu lore: respawn machine red lore: *b r e a d*

Soldier moments that I love 0:35 Soldier being visibly proud of himself because he’s smiling and holding the briefcase 1:53 Soldier is immediately fascinated by the bread and wants it, but then is disappointed when Medic takes it out of his reach 2:07 Soldier takes out his anger on scout because scout seems to be the weakest of the team and soldier knows he can’t do anything 2:15 Soldier smiling the second he hears engie say “you can teleport as much bread as you like” 2:43 Soldier starts counting his fingers after hearing Medic say that they have 3 days to live 3:02 Soldier being immediately interested and confused when spy says “this…is a bucket.” 3:23 Soldier looking at spy and trying to understand what he’s saying 3:37 Soldier being slightly spooked when spy’s hand goes towards him 4:21 Soldier raising his voice so spy can hear him saying “you did not read mine” because he wants the bucket 4:25 Soldier grabbing the bucket fast and protecting it like it’s his child 4:32 Soldier visibly enjoying his time with his bucket, then tries to cover it when he sees Medic and engie passing by 4:39 Soldier looking at a piece of bread, then getting the best idea in the world (teleport nothing but bread for 3 days) 10:02 Soldier either being happy for scout or thinking scout is a complete idiot 10:17 Soldier trying to get the breads attention by tapping on the glass, showing how much he likes it 10:29 “I teleported bread” “what.” “You told me to.” “How.. much..?” “I have done nothing but teleport bread for 3 days.” 10:37 Soldier tries to go for the bread, engie tries to stop him, but medic grabs him before anybody can do anything 12:26 Soldier laughs and says “I TELEPORTED BREAD!” while he gets dragged away 14:10 “Good news! We’re not dying! We are going to live forever!” 14:24 Soldier being happy for scout again, then confused, then back to happy Bonus moment(not soldier related) 14:39 “Friday I have to kill someone who presses a briefcase alar- oh wait, you’ll already be there for that one”

“This is a bucket” “dear god...” “There’s more-“ “Nooo....”

I love how random soldiers emotions are. He literally strangles scout out of anger for no longer being able to teleport bread.

I can't believe that they didn't make this a series it would've been so good.

4:20 "You did not read mine" "Does it say you want the bucke-" "Yes"

Overwatch: Heros never die! Team Fortress 2: gentlemen, synchronize your death watches.

Scout: "you look... um..." Demo: "DRUNK" Soldier: "ROUND. SOFT, no ROUND" Demo: "BLURRY"

“Good news,we’re not dying! We’re gonna live forever!” Has a way bigger meaning now

11:59 When you realise the Bazaar Bargain's sound was meant for the default rifle

The video when I'm alone: "This is a bucket." The video when parents walk by: "SEDUCE ME!!!!!"

It's literally his dad giving him a lesson on girls. Lucky.

Years later this still is amazingly funny

We needed about a hundred more films like this.

Ok yeah Spy is a great dad in this but MAD shout out to the Medic and Engineer for spending their last hours trying to figure out a cure/solution

It is a canon fact that Demo can play piano and Sniper can play the sax.. Im living

12:59 That's the first and only time I've seen that gun model.

14:43 i love how pyro is playing with his cute little bread

“You did not read mine” “Did it say you want the bucket” “Yes” *creeps away*

I feel for the spy. He honestly tried to bring the boys together to help everyone through their final days and nobody actually cared.

It's insane to go back and see just how human the writing is, like the mercs feel almost real.

"No i am GREAT with girls" "We both got buckets o' chicken... you wanna do it-"

I love how everyone just accepts that they're going to die in three days. Edit: to clarify, I mean how no one questions the logic of them dying of cancer despite none of them showing any symptoms.

I think you can really tell a lot about the mercs' personalities by how they decided to spend their last living moments. Scout tried to get a date with the girl he likes. Medic and Engie tried to find a solution. Spy was going to spend his time smoking, reading and drinking, but ended up helping his kind-of-son. Soldier teleported bread for three days.

emesis blu when theres a problem with the teleporter:gets ptsd emesis red:B R E A D

9 years, it took my 9 years to realize the title was refering to a expiration date of bread, AND humans, Clever valve, *reaaal clever*

"We cannot teleport bread anymore!" Soldier managed to correctly deduce the problem in under 5 seconds and this would have never happened if Engineer didn't fill his head with ideas

“WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!” “Tumors” Heavy: *nervous chewing*

Soldier: *teleports bread* Bread monster: *"ola"*

2:50 Pyro's "what" got a laugh out of me

Valve: "This is an update." TF2: *_"DEAR GOD!"_* Valve: "There's more." TF2: *_"NOOO!..."_*

"seduce me" "what" "SEDUCE ME"

"THIS! is a bucket..!" "D E A R G O D" "There is more.." "NO!!!!"

Scout: This never leaves this room. What he said: *Leaves the room less than a minute later.*

The fact that nobody blames Engie for the deadly teleporters really shows how close these guys are.

9:48 Scout-“you look....uh...” Demo-“BLURRY!”

After 9 years this is still an amazing short, I wished they made a series just like this

Red lore: WE CANNOT TELEPORT BREAD!!! blu lore: absolute horror and destruction

"Go to hell, Spy." "I'll see you all in hell" Very clever

Fun fact, the voice actress for Miss Pauling actually wrote this short. This long short. This medium. Edit (I don't remember editing this the first time so I can't give stuff on that); Miss Pauling's VA didn't fully write the script, as simsumboy22 said, rather helping in the process.

the last update valve truly cared about

It’s kinda funny that the first thing scout says is, hey I got a bucket of chicken

"seduce me." "you?" "seduce me." "what spy I ain't gonna.." "SEDUCE ME"

I'd watch this as a TV series.

"Question" "What's your question soilder?" "WHO LET THE DOG'S OUT"

I wish we had more of these

When you realize this is basically a video about a son asking his dad for dating advice.

"We both got buckets of chicken, wanna do it" "Eh, okay" Well that was easy

There is so many little details in this sfm. This was valve when they cared.

The fact this is 10 years old

I love how Engie and Medic are both willing to sacrifice their last hours to try to find a cure for everyone else

When the sniper said: “ ….. “ I felt that…

2:00 Medic: tumors!:D Heavy:wait....

"Oh and friday ive gotta kill someone that pressed a briefcase alarm button and... oh youre already gonna be at that one" PAULING WHAT?

"We have the resources, the will, to make these hours count!" *spy literally relaxes reading a magazine and smoking 2 minutes later*

These voice actors are actually incredible

I haven’t seen this in years and was laughing my ass off at the part where Spy was describing what Scout drew on the cards.

Tf2 marketing team is a different breed. I'm still out here rewatching this shit even tho I barely play the game.

This gets way funnier when you imagine the bread fight in pyro's pov.

“Teleport as much bread as you like” Soilder: don’t mind if I do

"HAHAHA! I TELEPORTED BREAAAAAAAAAAAAD!!!" is a really underrated quote

Paying attention to the background and character expressions really adds to these characters, making them feel much more connected and alive

4:20 "You did not read mine!" "Does it say you want the buc--" *Y E S*

9 years later to realise this was an advertisement for the game itself

I'm glad seeing people returning to that masterpiece after so many years. Never gets old.

I just realized Soldier came to the correct conclusion at the start, “we cannot teleport bread anymore,” not that they’re dying like the Medic and Engineer thought.

The “seduce me” scene is 100x better with spy being pretty much confirmed scout’s dad Edit: I thought this was common knowledge lol

How is this made 9 years ago. This was ahead of its time. This is hilarious

It is funny to think that Engineer and Medic are the ones who make the machines, so basically the Germen and American are the smart ones.

Who else wants a TF2 show like this?!

RU-vid: this is an ad Everyone: dear god RU-vid: there’s more Everyone: *no*

No matter how many times i have watched this , i always come back to watch it like it's the first time i have seen it

The fact that Spy is willing to spend his last hours helping Scout is actually really nice of him!

14:10 "Good news we are not dying, we are going to live forever!" -Soldier R.I.P Rick May, we'll never forget you!

3:00 5:37 these moments will be stuck in our heads

2:37 I just like how spy's face is like 😦

I think spy using his “ last “ hours to help scout is even better since spy is officially scouts dad

Two possible reasons Spy told Scout to help Pauling with the bomb: 1. He recognized that even though Scout's plan to set up a prom and push the missing intelligence button was completely asinine at best, it somehow lead to Pauling truly enjoying herself during her day off, and he wasn't going to let the opportunity go to waste 2. Scout has 2x payload push speed

AARRGH WE CANNOT TELEPORT BREAD ANYMORE! I love soldier.

Emisis blue:Horror Red lore:bread

not gonna lie scout has very good drawing skills.

“Hello ms Pauling, we killed everyone and stole a briefcase” I love soldier